A d r i a n C a r t e r ' s
P O V
I felt the walls closing on me.
I could hear their humorless chuckles as I screamed to be let out. The thumping of my fists ricocheted around the container, and a sense of helplessness washed over me.
I didn't know what I had done to deserve this.
I wanted to hold my father's hand and embrace my mother's warmth, not be locked in this cage.
I couldn't breathe here.
They didn't care about my pleas or cries, instead, they fed on my agony. It had been days since they kidnapped me, and I realized no one was coming.
I was all alone.
As the stench of my own urine reached my nostrils, I was overwhelmed with dread and fear.
I didn't think I would survive.
But I did survive.
I opened my eyes before I got consumed by the darkness taking refuge in my mind. I sighed and sat up straight in my bed. Another sleepless night of me reliving that wretched memory.
But the unyielding despair and pain that always accompanied these nightmares were gone, instead, I felt numb and detached.
Getting locked in that compact room had served as a trigger to memories I'd rather keep suppressed. The sequence of events of that horrid week from a decade ago repeatedly played in my head. They had belittled me and physically abused me. They had locked me up in a freezer in the basement as punishment for my cries and insolence.
Instead of focusing on the dreadful memory of captivity, I held onto the memory of crying into my mother's arms, after being freed from the torture. I had fought enough demons inside my head to face my fears and trauma, and I wasn't going to succumb now.
I wasn't willing to fall into the vicious cycle of self-destruction again.
I had gone through many phases in my past, from anger to withdrawal. I had battled all of it with my mother's unrelenting affection and support. I had channeled my rage to my advantage, making myself stronger, and finding my solace in football.
I had learned that we could let the bad things that happened to us define who we are, or we could define who we are.
And I chose the latter.
If I would've let fear dictate my life, I would've never truly lived. So I had decided to screw fear, and tell my own goddamn story. The reigns of my life were no longer in possession of distressing flashbacks, but in my own hands.
My concealed trauma might have escaped the threshold of my head, but I had the power to put it back in its place.
I went to the balcony to grab some fresh air when I found Ethan smoking there. He heard my footsteps and turned to regard me with his calculative glance. I leaned forward with my arms on the rails of the balcony.
"They're back?" He asked, referring to my nightmares. I wasn't even surprised that he had figured it out, Ethan usually kept to himself, but he was extremely perceptive. He extended his remaining cigarette to me.
I nodded and took a drag of the cigarette. I wasn't a habitual smoker, but on rare occasions, I enjoyed the buzz of it. It calmed my nerves, but I never allowed myself to get addicted to the feeling.
"Want to talk about it?" He offered, and I took another drag before stubbing the cigarette on the rails. The adrenaline rush I got from playing football wasn't something I wanted to fuck up because of this fleeting toxic comfort.
"Just another trigger," I shrugged, and he nodded. I had nothing to share that he didn't already know. "Do you?" I added, and he slightly shook his head.
I knew this week brought out the worst in Ethan, it was around this time five years ago when his mother had abandoned him, and he still hadn't been able to track her down. He altered between seeking attention from paparazzi and shutting everyone out.
"Nah, I'm good," he said indifferently and looked ahead at the stars that shone brightly in the dim light sky. I didn't bother berating him further. Instead, I stood next to him and turned my gaze to the view before us.
It reminded me that genuine moments were the truly radiant ones, the rest just faded away. The same way our pain would fade away.
"Come on, it wasn't that bad," Olivia said in mocking consolation, but when I continued to glower at her, she gave me a breathtaking smile. I held myself back from giving in, but it wasn't my fault that her smile was so fucking contagious.
She was the most headstrong and complex person I had come across. She feigned indifference and tried to push me away with her cold demeanour, but that reeled me in even more. Not because she was a challenge, but because she was so real.
She was reckless and brave by coming all alone to France in search of Jace.
She was loyal and protective when it came to the people she loved.
She was bold in dealing with the judgment of society and handling her business.
She was kind and gentle towards me that day, when she had no reason to be.
She was vulnerable and emotional, but even then she chose to be alone.
More importantly, I admired her because she didn't try to appease people or change herself to fit in. She didn't want to fit in, and her unusual nature is what made me befriend her.
"That's because you didn't have the stable guy feel you up," I retorted with a grimace, recounting the unpleasant encounter. I had been fucking uncomfortable, while Olivia had been trying hard to hold her laughter and snipping in details about my apparent break up with my boyfriend.
"You should be happy, at least men are attracted to you," she said with a teasing grin and I scoffed. I wasn't fazed by her replies anymore, I rather enjoyed them.
We had just made our way to the archery range and paused outside the entrance. Along the way, we had bickered about yesterday's stupid as fuck horse riding experience. Well, one of us had found it quite amusing, and it certainly hadn't been me.
"Are you sure about that, princess?" I asked mockingly and cocked my head to face her. "I still haven't forgotten how you took advantage of me." I grinned in satisfaction when her eyes flared up in irritation. Obviously, she didn't blush, that just wasn't who she was.
I loved provoking Olivia, her reactions never failed to intrigue me.
Honestly, I was extremely grateful that she had helped me through my panic attack, but talking about it just made me feel uneasy and self conscious. So when she had inquired how I was yesterday, I had turned the tables and instead decided to tease her about the kiss, if we could even call it that. She had acted nonchalant but took her revenge by pushing the stable guy towards me.
"Look, the fantasy where you're smart, funny, and appealing to women only exists in your mind. If I were you, I'd get over it." She shrugged while smirking, and I controlled the urge to prove her wrong.
Her words thoroughly amused me and challenged me to provoke her even more.
"Just like you're over our kiss?" I said mockingly and stretched out my arms to the wall behind her, effectively caging her in. Her enticing scent reached my nose, and I found myself staring at her intensely.
Her hazel eyes were gazing at me coolly, but there was an indescribable emotion flowing through them.
She crossed her arms over her chest then said, "How typical of you to obsess over something so trivial, too bad, it won't ever happen again."
I just rolled my eyes at her brush off and pulled back. She quickly moved away from me and opened the door to the range.
"I wouldn't be so certain," I said jestingly and sauntered behind her, and she scoffed. Riling her up had certainly become my favourite hobby.
By the time I reached inside, she had already reached the equipment area and was strapping on the gear. It was an open range, and we weren't the only ones here, a few guys who had been practicing had gotten distracted by a certain redhead's presence.
I couldn't blame them, but that certainly didn't stop me from wanting to gouge their lecherous eyes out. Olivia hadn't even blinked at their behaviour. She was busy carrying the bow to a vacant spot.
"You do archery?" I asked her after gearing up and taking a spot next to her, but Olivia looked a little hesitant.
"Not really, I mostly observe," she replied tersely, and picked up the bow. She was too stubborn to ask for help.
"I could teach you, sweetheart," A guy next to her offered and winked at her. He lewdly checked her out with an obnoxious smirk. I shot him a hard glare and moved forward to deal with him, but that wasn't what simmered him down.
"Why don't you become my dartboard instead?" Olivia said seriously and gazed at him coldly. He raised both his palms before he walked away. I whistled at his departure and turned to regard her with amazement.
I was in awe of her ability to call out people on their bullshit. She wasn't afraid to stand up for herself, but what irked me was that she internally thought no one else would.
She didn't rely on others to fight her battles, but she never expressed her pain either.
Even when she was surrounded by people she loved, she was utterly alone.
Her garden of loneliness was fenced with thorns of fear and mistrust and wires of hesitation.
She wasn't willing to let anyone in, but it made me want to protect her even more.
She grabbed an arrow and placed it on the bow before taking her stance. I wanted to correct her but didn't get the time as she drew the bow in haste. Then without further ado, she aimed and shot the arrow. It landed on the brink of the dartboard, which honestly, for an observer, was a commendable thing.
I wasn't a pro or anything, but my father had always treated everything as a competition. He wanted to beat me and never missed a chance to put me down. He called it motivation, but I knew better. It was just another way of feeding his ego and asserting his control over my life.
I fucking hated it, so I always trained myself to be better than him.
Olivia's hiss pulled me away from my thoughts. I looked at her in concern and realization dawned on me. Her wrong posture had caused her to face the brunt of the shot.
But she didn't ask for help. Instead, she bent to pick her bow again. Stubborn woman.
I rolled my eyes and went to her, she regarded me with a cold look, but it didn't bother me. It fascinated me how her eyes brimmed with determination to overcome everything that stood in her way.
I picked her bow before she could and took my stance. Upon drawing, I aimed and released the arrow which landed on the bullseye.
"Show off," Olivia muttered haughtily, but her eyes were smiling. "Since when have you been practicing?" She inquired, and I smirked at her.
I could see the excited glint in her eyes, but it was swirling with reluctance.
"Since I was ten," I said and paused before offering,"I could teach you if you want."
Her eyes wavered, and I thought I had finally made a breakthrough, but then a tight-lipped smile graced her face.
"I don't want to. I'm tired, let's call it a day," she said wryly, but her fingers twitched a little, and I could easily see through her lie. She was used to creating defenses around her because she treated life like a battlefield.
I didn't know anything about her past. But I sure as hell wanted to change her opinion about the present.
"Fine, we'll have it your way." I shrugged, while she nodded and turned her back to me. If she thought I was going to back down, she was in for a surprise.
"I'm claiming my third wish. Let me teach you archery," I said after her, and she stood still. Then she slowly pivoted on her heels and stared at me with incredulity.
Even I couldn't fathom why I was so persistent when it came to her, but I didn't care to ponder on the reason.
All I knew was that I loved riling her up at every turn and enjoyed her company a little too much.
"You're ridiculous," she said in disbelief and scoffed at me.
"It's all part of my charm," I said with a teasing grin, and she glared at me.
"This is unreasonable, one perfect shot doesn't make you a professional," she muttered under her breath and gave me a pointed look. Dealing with Olivia wasn't an easy task, but that was exactly why I relished it.
"Fine. If I teach you and you don't hit the bullseye in three tries, I'll let you borrow my car for a day," I proposed unwillingly, and her eyes lit up in amusement. She was crazy when it came to driving, and my car was fucking precious to me.
She very well knew that and had been coaxing me to let her borrow it for a ride. But I didn't like her that much that I'd let her destroy my car.
She walked back to me, and I grinned like a kid who had just received his favourite video game.
"And if I hit the bullseye?" She asked with a raised eyebrow as she stood facing me, her toes aligned with mine.
"I guess you'll have to wait to find out," I said feeling exhilarated, a perfect idea already running through my head. I wasn't stupid enough to wager my car, without knowing that Olivia had the potential to do it.
She eyed me skeptically, then murmured, "Fine, let's start."
"Your wish is my command, princess," I grinned at her and added, "Now, take your stance."
She picked her bow and stood with a little hunch. I placed my hand on her lower back, and she tensed up briefly before relaxing. Her feminine peppery scent consumed my senses. It was addicting and feisty, just like her.
"Lesson 1: Keep a straight back, don't lean or bend," I murmured to her and she complied with a nod. I removed my hand from her back while she retook the correct stance with her right shoulder forward, and her feet were shoulder-width apart. She was a keen observer.
"Draw your bow," I told her, and she did. "Lesson 2: Straighten your hand with the bow ahead of you, but keep it flexible with a slight bend in the elbow." My hand guided her elbow, and fucking weird sensations ran through my body, so I quickly retracted my hand, and Olivia shot me a quizzical look.
"Like this?" She asked in confirmation, and I nodded halfheartedly. An aftereffect of the sensations still ran through my veins. Get a hold of yourself, idiot.
"Don't lock up your shoulder," I emphasised, and she nodded.
"Now, all you have to do is look down the arrow shaft, aim at the centre, and release the string," I instructed from behind her and pointed towards the shaft. "Don't miss on purpose," I reminded her.
"I don't cheat," she said matter-of-factly, and I chuckled at her. She really was one of a kind.
I didn't want to be in her proximity to avoid a recurrence of the previous feeling.
I wasn't a fucking idiot to not understand the concept of attraction, but being attracted to Olivia wasn't right, it was all kinds of wrong.
Not because of any other reason, but the fact that she would just find more reasons to push me away.
I valued and respected her enough to not lose her over mere physical attraction. But was it just physical attraction?
I didn't know, and I didn't want to find out. That shit never ended well.
I broke myself out of my thoughts to notice Olivia as she took aim with concentration, shot the arrow, and it hit the bullseye.
I hooted in appreciation, and she looked thrilled. People regarded us with weird looks, but I couldn't care less. Watching her smile genuinely had made my fucking day.
I let her enjoy her newfound passion, and she kept practicing without breaking a sweat, while I observed her and gave her pointers. It was so fucking satisfying to watch her be excited about something, the cold look in her eyes transformed into a fiery resolve.
After her adrenaline wore off and we decided to depart, I decided to reveal my demand.
"Looks like you'll be coming to Ethan's party tonight," I said with a smirk, and she looked at me in outrage.
"You're unbelievable," she muttered and stared at me wryly.
"No, I'm just Adrian," I countered cheekily and she rolled her eyes.
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