The next morning, Anay had to rush to office. He had no time to think about the previous night. Salil had messaged a reminder to be on time for the meeting with Sen. He showered without soap and threw shirt and trousers on himself and got out of the house. On the way he thought about how he'd spend one more night alone in the apartment, but he pushed that thought for later. He had the difficult day to get through first.
The way it turned out; it wasn't a meeting to be proud of.
Everything had been done regarding the ad. Each input from Sen and his team had been incorporated. The creative team at Changemakers had been making sure the entire week to ensure that nothing that Sen wanted was left out. Salil did not want the balance payment to be pushed on to the next month. His express instruction to "close the fucking thing" had only served to put extra pressure on everyone.
Sen wasn't pleased. At least, not entirely. He reiterated the point he had been making since Day One. "I want something that will blow people's socks away. Something that will make them stop going to the loo during the ad break and sit up and take notice." And now he just sat there shaking his head. "It has not turned out the way I was promised," he said, looking directly at Anay across the table where the entire creative team was in attendance.
"Give us another week, sir," Anay said quickly. "One more week and we'll bring you the ad exactly as you see it."
"A week it is then," said Sen, standing up. "But only a week. I want the ad up before the product gets outdated. Just like human foods have fads, cat foods do too."
When Sen left, Anay crashed into his chair, deep in thought. Salil said, "Is there anything bothering you, Anay?"
"Not at all, sir," Anay said too quickly.
"Look at me, boy. You are here to work and make a name for yourself. A lot of eyes are on you. Everything depends on what steps you take here. You have a wonderful break at Changemakers, and I love you, but I can do only so much. The list of eager young men looking for similar breaks is too long, as you know."
With that not so veiled threat, Salil left the room. That was when Anay broke down and cursed the terrible turn his life was taking.
***
The only good thing about the day was that Shanaya called in the evening after leaving office. Anay quickly mended his disposition and they hopped over to The Bandana for dinner.
"Did you get a chance to talk to your boss?" she asked when they were done with their first round of beers.
"About?"
"About the job, Anay..."
"Oh, I will soon," he said and peered into his glass.
"My sleazy boss has started asking me to stay back at the office after everyone leaves. I have been making one excuse or the other so far. But one of these days..."
"He's an asshole," said Anay, flaring up. "Why don't you change your job and find something else?"
"I am looking, Anay. Apart from asking you, I have applied to a few other places too. But, you know, it will be special pleasure to work alongside you."
"I have no doubt of that." Anay attempted to smile. "I shall look forward to that day. We are currently busy with a difficult assignment. It has become a thorn in our side. My initial thought was to rope you in on this project, but it's not a good idea. Once I do this well, I shall have some negotiating power with my boss and get you in for sure."
There was silence for a while. Then she said, "I don't want you to think I am pestering you, okay? Please don't think I am meeting you only for a job."
"I know."
"I enjoy talking with you," Shanaya said. "Being with you is like being back home. All those school days..."
That thought made him genuinely smile. The carefree days of school! When nothing mattered; when he was king. There were no terrible ads to make, curbing one's own creativity and pandering to someone else's. It was so easy to impress doting teachers and fawning friends. Not like now when you had to kiss the ass of anyone who had money and called the shots.
"Those were fun days!" he said.
"Weren't they?" repeated Shanaya, excited. "I still remember so many things, like they happened just yesterday. All those friends we had... wonder what they are doing now. Do you remember them?"
"I don't think I do." Anay shrugged. "I am terrible with names and faces."
Shanaya laughed. "You would be!"
Anay laughed too. "What does that mean?"
"Why would you need to remember? You were the most desirable stud in school! Son of rich parents, strikingly handsome, and at the top of his game in everything."
"Really?"
"Compliment-fisher! Of course, ya! All the girls were crazy about you. I am sure some of the boys had a thing for you too!" She winked.
"Whoo, whoo, slow down! All the girls?"
Shanaya blushed.
"Not you?"
"Well, I won't say no. But we were such kids back then!"
Anay stared into her eyes with a mischievous smile dancing on his lips. "So, as long as we are confessing, let me tell you this. I had a major crush on you too."
"Really?"
"Of course! The boys could not stop chattering about you. They got haircuts to impress you! And when they talked about you, I used to feel like socking a punch in their bloody jaws. I felt for you so bad!"
There was more laughter.
"Do you remember the kiss?" she said.
A knot arose in Anay's throat. "Our first kiss..."
"Two young people, mad for each other, ended up sharing their first kiss," she said, "and then we were so embarrassed we hardly talked."
"I want to thank you, Shan," Anay said suddenly, his eyes turning a bit misty.
"What for?"
"I don't know if you feel it too, but this place has something about it," said Anay. "I used to think that a big city is all fun and glamor, and that is what we are all chasing, really, but at the end of the day, we are just lonely as hell. We are just feeding on this soulless city, like maggots feeding on a corpse."
"Oh, what an analogy! What brings that on, Anay?"
"The thing I want to tell you is... thanks for coming back into my life like this. I am not lonely here anymore. You know, when I left my family, it wasn't in the best of circumstances. For a while, I didn't think any of that mattered—family, friends. I still don't think, to be honest. But when you came here, it was like a breath of fresh air. I found a friend."
"Now don't get all sentimental on me, Anay!" Shanaya laughed. "You are a strong, motivated guy. You mustn't think about all these things."
"Nah, all of that... that attitude, that personality, is just on the surface. Beneath it all, I am just as lonely as any other bloke."
"Damn it! Let's have one more beer for you!" Shanaya snapped her fingers at a passing waiter and indicated an order for another pint. Then she said, "And as far as being lonely is concerned, you don't need to worry about it. I am here now."
It was the way she said it that did something to Anay. No, it was no commitment, but it was the exact thing he wanted to hear in that moment. He slid his hand across the table and felt her fingers tentatively. "Shan, tell me one thing," he said, moving up his hand on hers, carefully measuring her reaction. "Do you feel for me? I mean, do you think about me when I am not with you?"
"As a friend, ya!" she said with widened eyes, emphasizing the 'ya!'
"I mean more than that..." Anay said. "Last night, I was feeling so lonely, and all I could think of was you. I just wanted to message you, call you, and... and I hoped you were with me in my room."
She looked away, mumbling something incoherent. For a moment, Anay worried that he had angered her, but probably she was just bemused. There was no anger on her face.
He felt bold enough to ask her the question. "Shanaya..."
"What?"
"Look, don't get angry..."
"I won't. Why should I?"
"Look, I am always thinking about you. All the time. What if... I mean... would you come with me to my house tonight?"
There was a long moment of silence. She put her spoon and fork back into her plate and drank up her beer.
Anay's eyes did not leave her for a second. While deep in thought thus, she looked so much more desirable.
She narrowed her eyes, and he could not sit straight anymore. "Anay," she said, and there itself he knew what was coming. "It won't be appropriate, not at this time."
"Okay, sure. Of course, of course... I understand." In that moment, he wanted to kill himself. She had meant friend and he had taken it too far. He had screwed up the one good thing that he had going. Would she ever meet him again?
"Know this—you are the sexiest man I have ever met in person," she said. "But you see... we are both working here and something like that happens between us and doesn't work out, it will destroy both of us. I hope you understand."
Anay stammered with his words.
She took her hand away. Changing her tone, she said, "And with that, let's drop the subject. Shall we have some dessert?"
They had no dessert. For once, Anay could not wait to pay the check and get out of the accursed place where his humiliation had been put up on such prominent display.