Chapter 22
I drove Louis to the game the next day. Coach wanted his help to coach the team now that he couldn't be on the field himself while I would take his place as the captain. I was quite nervous about it, but I tried my best not to let it show.
We were currently warming up, the whole team standing in a circle on the field, passing the ball to each other while one of us was in the middle, trying to steal it. If you did, you switched places with the one passing the ball.
The warm-up continued until the referee blew his whistle, calling the opposing team's captain and me to the centerline. After tossing the coin — which I won — we walked back to our separate teams, now gathered at the side of the field to talk before the game began.
Coach and Louis had joined the circle when I reached them, Coach talking about what we should think about and what our priorities were. When he was finished, I got to say the last words.
"Alright, guys. Let's go out there and kick some ass!"
And that was exactly what we did.
After the first half of the game, we were winning with 3-0. I had scored two of the goals and Niall the other one while our defenders were doing a great job keeping their attackers away from the goal, and Liam was playing at his very best.
It felt amazing. I didn't recall the last time I had felt this excited for a game. The adrenaline was pumping in my veins, and I could tell I wasn't the only one, judging by the atmosphere around the team.
We were now sitting in the locker room, chatting about the first half of the game and how we would keep up the good work, when Louis plopped down on the bench beside me, placing his crutches on the floor.
"You're doing a great job out there, Curly," he complimented.
I turned to him, a toothy grin forming on my lips. "Thank you, Louis."
He returned the smile half-heartedly. I could tell he was sad that he couldn't play, and I felt bad for him. I patted his thigh twice to show my support. "We're missing you out there, you know?"
He cracked another smile, shrugging his shoulders. "I'll be back soon enough."
I nodded in agreement.
After that, it was time to head back to the field. We left the locker room and got ready to play the second half of the match.
We ended up winning the game, and the adrenaline among the team was most definitely the reason behind it. It ended 5-1, with Zayn and Ryan scoring the last two goals. Coach was pleased. It wasn't hard to tell when we were sitting in the locker room ten minutes after the game.
"You did amazing out there, guys. Everyone watching should be proud. I know I am," he smiled, looking between us with a bright smile on his lips.
"Coach is right," I agreed. "We played without our captain today, and I am proud of you guys for managing so well without him. I did my best, but I am sure I'm not only speaking for myself when I say we missed him out there with us today."
I turned to Louis, who was sitting on the bench opposite me, sending him a smile. He flashed me a small one in return, shaking his head as if I was being a sappy mom. I didn't care, though. He deserved to know the truth.
The other guys hummed in agreement, the two guys sitting beside Louis patting him on the shoulder. "Thank you, guys, I appreciate it. I'll be back to kick ass soon enough," he chuckled, avoiding the glare Ryan shot him.
"Alright, guys. Off to the showers!" Coach announced, clapping his hands together before leaving the locker room.
Chatter erupted when he shut the door behind him, making it impossible to hear what anyone was saying. Niall was sitting beside me, stripping off his sweaty gear.
"You did great out there, Harry," he complimented sincerely.
A smile formed on my lips. "Thanks. You too, mate."
He rolled his eyes. "I meant you were great at being captain, idiot."
I looked down at my lap. "Louis' the better captain," I said, furrowing my eyebrows.
Niall looked over at the feathery-haired boy talking to Zayn and Trevor. "Louis' great, but you're good too. Coach should have made you co-captains."
I shook my head, looking up at him. "No. I'm happy being an alternate. Louis wouldn't be happy if he had to share the post."
"Nonsense," he scoffed. "I don't know what is going on between you two, but something has changed, and I'm pretty sure Louis wouldn't mind sharing anything with you. You're even sharing his car now," he chuckled, rolling his eyes.
I nudged him in the side, feeling my cheeks heat as I looked over at the blue-eyed boy across the room, who was now looking our way. "That doesn't..." I trailed off, my eyebrows knitted. "That's not true."
"Whatever you say, mate. Whatever you say."
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The next few days, Louis and I talked more than we had in what seemed like forever. It finally felt like it did before my birthday party again, which meant he always lingered in the car after I had driven him home after school. It meant that he insisted on joining me to my work again, and it also meant that he made sure to include me in conversations he had with other people.
It felt amazing. Yet, I hadn't forgotten what Lottie told me at the diner the other day, nor what Louis had said about thinking no one cared about him. I had made sure not to bring it up since I knew he would only get reserved if I did. I figured I would have to wait until he trusted me and wouldn't get up and leave as soon as I asked him about it.
It was now Friday, a week after we had hung out at Niall's place, and Louis was finally allowed to take off the bandage and start using his foot without the help of crutches again. He was ecstatic about it. When he came back from the nurse, walking (but limping slightly) on both feet, he was beaming.
And his good mood lasted the entire day. When we met up at our lockers after the last class, as usual these days, he grabbed his bag from his locker and slung it over his shoulder, giving me a knowing look.
"See? Perfectly capable of carrying my own bag," he said, making me roll my eyes.
"I'm sure it's happy about that, given how badly you've been treating it the last couple of days," I chuckled.
He snorted, closing his locker. "I didn't lie when I said I never liked it, so it's used to the way I treat it."
I wanted to hit him for being so ridiculous, but I settled with letting out a bark of laughter. "I can't believe we're talking about a bag. It's not like it has feelings."
His lips threatened to twitch, even if he remained serious. "Who knows? This bag might have," he smirked, making me smile in amusement.
Before I could say anything, the lads joined us at the lockers. "What are you guys laughing about?" Zayn asked, raising his eyebrows at us.
By now, they had all accepted that Louis and I had grown closer and no longer questioned it. Niall was still suspicious, though. I could tell by the way his gaze always followed us and lingered.
"Louis claims his bag has feelings, but I'm trying to tell him he's ridiculous," I said, muffling a laugh with the back of my hand.
Louis rolled his eyes while the three guys looked at us as if we were stupid. "I'm starting to question if you two growing closer was a good idea," Liam muttered, shaking his head, but an evident smile played on his lips.
Louis scoffed, grabbing my bicep. "Come on, Curly. I don't have time to talk to these idiots."
"Speak for yourself, Tommo. We're not the ones claiming a bag has feelings," Zayn called after us, making me chuckle.
We didn't get far until Louis halted in his steps and had to slow down due to his limp. I slowed down to walk beside him, making sure I didn't pressure him to walk faster.
As soon as we arrived at his car, he placed a hand on his hip while extending the other to me, his palm facing upward. I cocked an eyebrow at him, making him tilt his head to the side, a wide grin on his face.
"I want my car back now that I can drive again."
My mouth fell open. I hadn't thought about that. I had gotten so used to accompanying him to his car that I didn't think about the fact that he could drive now, let alone that he might not even want me here. I lived on the other side of town after all.
I quickly fumbled in my back pocket, pulling out the car key and handing it to him. He narrowed his eyes when he noticed I wasn't making eye contact.
"What crawled up your ass and died, Curly?" He asked, his hand still on his stuck-out hip.
I pursed my lips. "I uh, I guess I should head to the bus stop," I mumbled, nodding towards it, but I didn't move to leave.
He scoffed. "Nonsense, I'm driving you. You've been driving me for over a week now, so that's the least I can do."
I furrowed my eyebrows. "But I've been driving your car, Louis."
He shook his head. "It doesn't matter. You've been paying for the gas, and I wouldn't let you take the bus anyway. Come on, just get in the car," he ordered, limping to the driver's seat.
I bit my bottom lip, thinking about it for a few seconds before sighing and walking to the passenger side. I put my bag on the car floor and got inside, shutting the door at the same time as Louis.
He turned on the engine with a bright smile. It was easy to tell that he had missed driving. His entire aura showed it. He reached out to turn on the radio, and loud rock music instantly began blaring through the speakers, making me press my fingers to my ears.
"For God's sake!" I groaned, making him laugh, but he turned down the volume a few seconds later.
"Sorry, princess," he smirked. "Forgot there's a sensitive baby in the car."
I huffed, looking out the side window. He chuckled at me and pulled out of the spot to drive to my house.
"So," he said after a couple of minutes, glancing at the side of my face. "Have you found any car you're interested in yet?"
I bit my lip, shrugging. "There are a few, but I haven't looked too much into it," I admitted. If I were honest, I hadn't thought much about it now that I had driven Louis' car, but I would miss being able to go anywhere I could, so I needed to get to grips with it.
"Been too busy drooling over mine?" He assumed, raising his eyebrows at me.
I couldn't help the smile that formed on my lips. "Maybe."
"It's hard not to fall in love with it," he said knowingly.
I rolled my eyes. "Such a bragger."
His lips curled. "Oh, you love it."
I bit my lip to prevent myself from smiling wider. I was starting to think that he was right. My feelings for him were growing so strong I was sure other people would have defined them as love.
I decided not to answer him. Instead, I let my gaze wander out the window, looking at the bypassing trees and houses.
"Can I ask you something?" Louis questioned after a while, glancing at the side of my face.
I turned to meet his gaze. "Sure."
Furrowing his eyebrows, he bit his lip. "How did you cope when your dad left? Wasn't it hard to process that he just left without caring about staying in touch with you?"
I didn't expect him to ask me about that. I rarely talked about my dad since he was in the past. He wasn't part of my life anymore since he had made it clear that he didn't want anything to do with it.
I shrugged. "Of course it was tough initially, but I guess you learn to live with it after a while. My mom has done an amazing job raising Gemma and me by herself, and she's never made us feel like we needed a father figure again after he left," I explained. Even if it was long ago, the subject was still touchy, and it would probably always be.
Louis nodded, cracking a small smile. "I see."
"Why are you asking?"
He shook his head. "No reason. I was just curious."
I pursed my lips, turning to look out the window again. We stayed quiet for the rest of the ride, which only lasted about five minutes. When he pulled over outside my house, I felt reluctant to get out of the car. I didn't want to leave him yet, especially not now that things were so great between us.
He looked at me, raising his eyebrows at the expression on my face. "Something's on your mind, Curly?"
I met his gaze, biting my bottom lip. "You want to come inside? I'm not working today, and we don't have soccer practice," I could feel my stomach fill with nerves. Even if we had grown closer, we still hadn't hung out just the two of us since before my birthday.
The corners of his lips twitched at my request. "Sure, why not?"
"Great," I grinned, unbuckling my seatbelt and opening the car door, now feeling much more willing to leave.
It wasn't until then I noticed Gemma's car in the driveway. I hoped that she wouldn't torture me about Louis now that she knew I had feelings for him. It would be the first time she met him since she learned about it after all.
With my bag slung over my shoulder, I walked to the front door of my house, Louis following close behind. I decided to stay quiet when we entered the building, hoping Gemma wouldn't show up.
After tossing my bag to the side, shrugging off my jacket and getting out of my boots, I turned to Louis, who was waiting for me to enter the house. "Hungry?"
An amused smile made its way to his lips. "Are you offering me your sandwiches again?"
I pouted. "There's nothing wrong with my sandwiches. They're delicious, but we can have something else if you don't like them."
We started walking to the kitchen, Louis nudging me in the side playfully. "I'm just kidding, but I want to show you how real sandwiches are made."
I looked at him with raised eyebrows. "You, making sandwiches?"
His mouth fell open. "What gives you the impression that I don't know anything about food?"
Rolling my eyes, I shook my head. "Wouldn't take you as a cook, is all." I shrugged, earning another nudge in the side, this one a little harsher than the first.
He was about to reply when he caught sight of the girl sitting at the kitchen table, sipping on a cup of tea. She looked up as we entered, her eyes widening in recognition.
"Oh, Louis," Gemma said, her eyes flicking to me in surprise.
I bit my bottom lip, averting my gaze from her.
"Hi, Gemma."
"Hey," she replied, composing herself. "It's been a while since I last saw you. Where have you been?"
Louis furrowed his eyebrows, eyes darting to the floor for a second before moving back up. "Um..."
"He's been injured, Gemma, and that makes your life shitty," I explained, finishing for him. I could tell he didn't like the topic, and I knew why, considering how he had been acting lately.
He shot me an appreciating smile before looking back at Gemma, whose mouth had formed the shape of an 'o'. "I see. Well, it's nice to see you again," she said, her eyes flicking to me to send me a wink.
I mentally groaned, getting frustrated about the situation. I had always known it would be a bad idea that she knew about my feelings for Louis.
"You too," Louis smiled, seemingly not having caught the wink.
I shot Gemma a pointed look, making her sigh and reluctantly get up from her chair. "I'll see you around, boys."
On her way out of the kitchen, she made sure to bump my hip with hers behind Louis' back, and yet again, I wanted to hit her. She needed to lay off.
"So, where do you have the good stuff?" Louis hummed, walking over to the fridge curiously.
He tried to assemble two sandwiches for the next half hour, but it did not go well. He first managed to drop the ham on the floor, which he blamed on me for being 'in the way'. Then, he squirted way too much mustard on one of them, which he blamed on 'the damn bottle'. Finally, he put so much stuff on them that they didn't look edible. You couldn't cut them without everything falling out.
"And you told me the chicken stew didn't look appealing," I said, scrunching my nose at the sandwich before me.
Louis rolled his eyes. "Don't knock it till you try it."
The sandwich wasn't good, just as I had assumed, and I made sure to tell Louis that. Maybe it would stop him from bragging so much, although I doubted it. I wouldn't let him think it was good, though. If it could be prevented, no one deserved to have that made for them.
"It wasn't that bad, Curly," Louis told me once we had finished eating (I left half of mine) and were walking to my room.
"Yes, Louis, it was," I said, lying down on my bed.
He huffed, walking over to the shelf beside my closet and letting his eyes wander over the picture frames and books. "Is this you?"
He was holding a picture of me as a kid, hugging a teddy bear to the side of my face.
I groaned. "No. Louis, stop."
He chuckled, placing the picture frame back on the shelf. "It's cute, though. I didn't know you used to have straight hair," he smiled, striding over to sit on the edge of my bed at my feet.
I heaved myself up in a sitting position, scooting over to sit next to him. "It turned curly when I was twelve."
He pursed his lips, nodding.
It suddenly hit me that he was here, sitting on my bed in my room. I had pictured this happening several times before but never thought it would happen. It made me nervous, but I tried to remind myself that this was Louis, the Louis I had grown comfortable being around.
"Can I ask you something?"
This felt like a great opportunity to ask him about what Lottie had mentioned at the diner since it didn't feel like he would run right now.
He knitted his eyebrows, thinking for a few seconds before answering. "Only if I can ask you something first."
His words caught me by surprise. What could he possibly want to ask me? "Uh, sure." I shrugged, getting more aware that our thighs were pressed together.
He bit his bottom lip as he turned to me. "How did you realize you were bisexual?"
My mouth fell open in shock. That was not what I had expected him to ask.
It took a few seconds until I found the ability to reply. "Um, I don't know? I guess I just knew I was attracted to both girls and boys at some point."
The crease between his eyebrows deepened. "You just knew? You never felt the need to like... try out your theory or something?"
The question that kept repeating in my head was, why was he asking me this? "I uh... I may have gotten the urge to kiss a guy when I was thirteen, and I may or may not have kissed him when I brought him home to my house once," I admitted, biting my lip.
The nerves were suffocating me, and talking about kissing people with Louis felt like an awful idea because I could feel the same... no, worse, urge to kiss him build up inside me as with the guy five years ago.
"Yeah?" He breathed, his face inching closer to mine, making my heart race. He was so close that I could feel his breath on my lips, making it hard for me to breathe. "And you knew you were bisexual after kissing him?"
Swallowing hard, I nodded curtly. "I... yeah. I guess so."
He hummed, and the crease between his eyebrows was so deep now that I was sure it couldn't get deeper. He was looking me in the eye, and he was so close that I could barely see his entire face. I inhaled deeply to stop my heart from racing, but it was useless. It didn't make matters better when he reached out to run his fingertips along my cheekbone, so feathery light that I could barely feel it.
His eyes dropped to my lips briefly before looking back into mine. The action made me stop breathing altogether because I could feel it; he was going to kiss me. The Louis Tomlinson that I had been crushing on for more than three years was about to kiss me. Was this a dream that I would wake up from the second our lips touched?
Before I could think further about it, Louis shut his eyes and leaned in to close the small distance between us. His soft, pink lips nudged against my own, making a soft gasp escape my mouth, a tingling sensation making its way through my body. I didn't know how to react, so I sat there, frozen as his lips moved gently against mine, almost massaging them.
When I snapped back to reality, I began moving my lips with his, feeling a new sensation run through my body. This feeling was something I had never experienced before. It was like my entire body was on fire, yet only our lips were touching.
I was about to reach out and place my hand on the side of his neck when he pulled away so quickly that I could feel my heart drop in my chest. When I fluttered my eyes open, Louis was staring at me wide-eyed, his mouth hanging open. "I-I... shit. I shouldn't... fuck, I shouldn't have done that."
He abruptly rose from the bed and started limping backward towards the bedroom door. I shook my head frantically, feeling a stab in my heart with every step he took. "Louis, wai—"
"I'm sorry, Harry," he mumbled, looking at me with an apologetic glint in his eyes that made me want to crawl into a ball and cry my eyes out.
With that said, he opened the door and walked away, leaving me sitting on my bed with a broken heart.
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Oh my God. Oh my God. They kissed! But Louis left... What do you think is going on inside Louis' head?
I hope you liked this long chapter! And I just wanted to tell you guys that even if I don't reply to all of your comments, I see them and they always make me so happy. Thank you so much for that, love you <3
Pauline .xx