Mask of Celibacy

Da Carolyn_Hill

134K 14.4K 14.3K

In the late nineties asexuality is all but ignored as an orientation. Jess doesn't understand her complex arr... Altro

Premise
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36
Chapter 37
Chapter 38
Chapter 40
Appendix I: Glossary of Ace/Sexual Terms
MASK OF CELIBACY has won the Wattys 2021!

Chapter 39

1.9K 266 176
Da Carolyn_Hill

A/N: This is a double update, so please read Chapter 38 first! <3 

Tomorrow is the last update, and then the book is finished ahhhhhhhhh! 

Thank you for all your support, my dear readers. I know I need to edit this chapter, but the deadline is tomorrow and I'm freaking out! lol

___

Being completely blind without my glasses meant I could properly enjoy the grand reveal at the end of a hairdo. I gasped with delight. Angel had swept my long hair up and teased it into tight curls held in place with a pearl comb and about a gallon of hairspray. 

Tendrils hung down to soften the look. 

No lie, it belonged on a Disney princess. 

"I love it," I exclaimed. "Thank you, Angel."

"You look positively fabulous," he said with a broad grin. He turned to Mom and Yaya. "You both have beautiful granddaughters."

They sat proud as Jack and Bryan after defeating the enemy team. 

I turned to Care and my mouth fell open. "Oh, sis! You look absolutely gorgeous!"

Her ebony hair hung half-down in long, glossy waves, the rest swept back into a gorgeous princess braid lined with decorative flower pins. When I handed Care her glasses, she squealed with delight.

On the way home, we worried about every bump and swerve ruining our beautiful hairstyles, something I never thought neither of us would ever do. 

Care and I slunk into our dresses and high heels. While she wore a strapless gown of pure white silk covered by sheer gossamer, my royal purple silk gown rustled as it cascaded to the floor. 

Shit, I've lost weight again! Fuck, you can see my bra!

"Oh, no!" I exclaimed as I twisted this way and that as part of my giant granny bra gaped above the dark purple gown. Back then they didn't have cute bras my size. "This is a fashion disaster."

"Don't worry," said Mom. "I can fix this."

She found a couple of large safety pins and covered the offending material so that nothing showed. I breathed a sigh of relief, jumping up and down to make sure everything stayed in place. 

Stupid primping sucks!

After a car door had slammed shut, I rushed to the window and caught a peek of our little ensemble through the horizontal blinds. Right on time, Eric and Jack got out of the black limo dressed in expensive, fancy black tuxes. Dressed in a gray tux, Bryan held out his hand for his new date--a short, pretty blonde girl I recognized from church--and sauntered to Care's front door. 

They all walked up to Care's house and rang the doorbell.

So soon? Damn, I'm not ready yet!

I added a touch more hairspray to my elaborate hairdo while Care tightened the clips holding her princess braid in place. The last thing we needed was for our styles to fall to smithereens after the first fast dance.

"Don't run to the door, sweetheart," called Yaya from the living room. "I'll get it."

"Little worry of that," muttered Grandad. "They've been up in that bathroom for hours."

"Yes, don't ruin your beautiful hair," Mom called up to us as I fussed with a wayward lock, smoothing it down with one last dab of hairspray.

"Don't forget to leave time for pictures," said Grandad.

"No, wait!" called Care. "Don't let them in yet."

The door opened with the familiar creak.

"Or go ahead and let them waltz right through," muttered Care under her breath.

I rushed out of the bathroom and peeked at the group from the landing above, where they couldn't see me. They'd gathered in Care's living room, standing around in awkward anticipation.

Except for Eric. He stood tall and proud, jutting his chin. Then I realized why. The last time that Bryan and Jack had seen him was last year when they'd bullied a skinny, nerdy kid. 

His change in appearance seemed to win over the two jocks because they treated him with the proper respect that they should always have shown him. While I admired their ability to put the past behind them, their shallowness kind of pissed me off. 

I didn't blame Eric one bit for keeping a polite but proud distance from his former tormentors. 

"Good evening, Ted," came Eric's voice, rich as dark chocolate and smooth as velvet. "You're doing well, I hope?"

"Yes, very well," Grandad replied. "Come in, gentlemen."

Bryan escorted his girlfriend into the foyer. "Thank you, sir."

"Jack, my boy! I haven't seen you in quite a while."

"Yes, sir!" replied Jack in a mature voice I never heard at school. "Ever since they changed the schedule for the youth football league practice, I've had to attend eight o'clock mass."

"I'm impressed, young man." Grandad stood tall and proud, giving him a friendly nod. "Dedication to your sport and loyalty to the faith."

"Yes, sir." Jack stood proud but accorded my grandfather the proper respect. "Coaching looks very good on the CV."

"Full ride, I hear?"

Jack nodded. "Just like my buddy Bryan and Eric."

At that, Eric stiffened. I didn't blame him. He probably didn't appreciate being lumped together with two guys who had received full tuition based solely on their skills with a football.

"Jess and Care are just getting ready," Mom said. "They'll be down in a minute."

"You know women and their elaborate hairdos."

Grandad, OMG! Stop embarrassing me.

"Come on, Care!" I hissed outside the bathroom door. "We gotta go before our grandparents embarrass the hell out of us."

"Coming!"

"Girls, let's go!" called Yaya upstairs.

"I'm coming! Jeez!"

"My, don't you look dashing," Mom exclaimed as she eyed Eric with a critical gaze. "A full tux complete with a vest. I'm impressed, young man. You went the whole nine yards."

Bryan and Jack exchanged a meaningful glance as they stared at their own tuxes. I couldn't see a difference. Then again, what the hell did I know about men's fashion? 

Eric jutted his chin. "Thank you, Carmel."

"Just wait until you see my lovely little girl," Mom gushed, making my blush superfluous. "She's an angelic vision from heaven."

"As always."

"So, tell me, Eric dear..."

Everyone fell silent as I took a deep breath and descended the stairway into the living room. When Eric stood at the base of the stairs, his eyes widened with delight. His lips parted a fraction as he drew in a breath. 

"Lovely, isn't she?" Mom said.

"Yes," he breathed. "Stunning."

I held up my a corner of my purple dress so that I wouldn't trip, revealing my sparkling gray heels. Eric took my hand, covered in arm-length white gloves, as I descended the last two steps. Holding out the crook of his arm for me, he tucked my arm against his side.

His black tux had been immaculately pressed, and he'd trimmed his hair to less than an inch long. I hardly dared to look at him because I was nervous.

"You're so handsome," I whispered.

He didn't say anything but gave my hand a gentle pat. I braved a look at him, and he flashed me a rare smile.

Care descended the stairs next as Jack gazed up her. He took a page out of Eric's book and extended his arm out to her as well, prompting her to give me a surprised look of pure joy.

"You're absolutely beautiful, Carolyn Stavros."

Care adjusted his bow-tie, which lay slightly askew. "So are you, Jack Kowalski."

"We will need some pictures in the garden first," Mom said to Eric. "Do you have Jess' corsage?"

"Oh, of course," he replied. He rushed to the table and presented me with a beautiful purple wrist arrangement featuring one perfect cream rose in the center. "I hope you like it."

"Thank you so much, Eric!" I said, breathless. "It's beautiful."

"Just like you," he whispered.

My cheeks felt like someone had set them on fire as he slipped it over my wrist. "I love it."

"Come on," Grandad said, curling his lip. "Picture time."

After a few moments, Mom raced out of the front door. "Your necklace, dear! You forgot it."

She handed me the silver jewelry, and I looked up at Eric. "Would you mind helping me?"

"Of course, my muse."

He clasped the necklace, gently brushing his hands across my shoulders after he'd finished. A whole flurry of butterflies danced in my stomach as tingles traced along his touch. Closing my eyes, I remembered him kissing my neck, and pleasant goosebumps rose along my skin.

After a whole host of pictures, including some of Eric and me as Care and Jack looked on with pride, he turned to me and placed a hand on my waist.

"Time to go," Eric whispered. "We don't want to be late."

"Have a lovely time, dear," Mom called out. "Remember, no drinking. No drugs. Resist--"

"I'll protect her, ma'am," Eric said. "But I don't think she needs it. Jess is a strong woman and can take care of herself."

Mom nodded with tears in her eyes as I climbed into the black limo with Eric. The smell of leather polish wafted in the air along with faint hints of shower gel and perfume.

"Wow, we get to travel in such style," I exclaimed.

Eric gave a shy half-smile. "It's more economical when there's six of us."

"I meant it genuinely." I stroked the leather seats. "Never seen anything like it."

"Sir, are you all ready?" came a voice over a loudspeaker.

To my surprise, Eric replied. "Yes, thank you, Mr. Jenkins."

We all shifted our gaze to Eric, who blushed as he donned his sunglasses. 

"Is this your limo?" asked Care, wide-eyed.

"No, my father often uses the same limo service to impress his clients," replied Eric in a matter-of-fact voice. "That meant we could get a decent price for six people."

"Gosh," breathed Care, "thank you, Eric."

"That's fine," he said with a shy smile as he stared out the window and reached for my hand.

I felt bad for Bryan's date, who must have felt out of place amid a group who all knew each other. A pretty blonde in a gorgeous navy blue dress, she stared at her hands in silence. 

I leaned over and asked, "Hey, you're Kristin, right? I'm Jess."

She gave a shy smile. "Yeah, we go to the same church. I've seen you read. You're really good."

A faint blush crept upon my cheeks. "Aww, thanks." I cleared my throat and cast a cursory glance at Bryan and Kristin together, noticing that they didn't hold hands like the rest of us. "Have you two been dating long?"

"Oh, no! We're going as friends," she said with a polite smile. "I'm going with Bryan, and then he's going with me next weekend."

"Awesome!"

Jack planted a gentle kiss on Care's lips, prompting her to reach up and wrap her hands in his hair. Bashful, I looked at our entwined hands before Eric gave me a tender squeeze.  

I gazed up at him while he stared down at me, searching my face for permission.

When I leaned toward Eric, he planted a tender kiss on my lips. 

Bryan cleared his throat. "We're here, guys."

As the limo stopped in front of the main entrance, Eric stepped out of the limo and held his hand out to me. I tripped a bit when my heels caught the fabric. Eric reached out for me to steady me, after which he wrapped his arm around my waist and gazed at me with those deep, soulful eyes. 

We stood there--God only knew how long--until Jack cleared his throat and gestured towards the entrance with his chin. "Shall we?" he asked.

Care and I walked inside the Sheraton together with our dates on either side of us. In the most subtle whisper she could manage she said, "O-M-G, marry him!"

"I know, right?" I whispered, my cheeks hurting from our broad smiles.

As we entered the lobby surrounded by our classmates, the others gaped at us in surprise. There stood Jack the Jock escorting one of the biggest nerds in the entire senior class. Lord knew that I could judge that for a fact. Still he stood prouder and taller than he ever had with Nicky. No one would dare to judge his choice, and if they did, I would kick their asses from here to China. 

All the popular beta girls swarmed away from Sarah and Nicky, flocking around Jack and Care instead. I breathed a sigh of relief as the attention shifted to them, allowing Eric and me to make a discreet exit. We got some air on the balcony as the sun set on the horizon. 

"I can't believe we're at prom," I said to Eric. "And I'm actually enjoying it."

He reached for my hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. "Same, to be honest."

"I can't believe everything fell into place," I whispered as the others spoke, brimming with emotion. "I didn't think my family would ever budge."

"You have every reason to be proud, resolving that so well," he said. 

"Eric?"

"Yes, my muse?"

I gazed up at him and rose on my tiptoes, steadying myself on his shoulders. Placing his hands firmly on my waist, he planted a gentle kiss on my lips as I snaked my arms around his neck.

That was when it happened--an ignominious ping as one of the safety pins came free, revealing my bra. 

"Oh, God!" I cried, hiding from him.

"What's wrong, my muse?" he asked, furrowing his brow as he backed away. "Did I do something wrong?"

"My bra!" I cried. "I--I--I mean, my dress!"

He raised a quizzical brow. "What?"

"The pin came free, and you can see my bra!" I cried in an anguished whisper. 

"Should I give you some privacy?" he asked, turning around so that I could fix it.

With a frustrated growl, I couldn't do it. The damn pin had to fit in such a precarious way that only another person could see what they were doing without stabbing me.

"Ouch! Damn it!"

"Can I do something?"

"Can you get Care, please?" I asked, flustered. "I can't do it, and I can't go back in there like this."

He hurried back inside to find her but came back empty.  

"They're all seated for dinner and the principal is speaking," he said with a concerned look.

"Shit!"

"I don't mean to be forward, but could I help?"

"Could you?" I asked. "I mean--only if--"

"It's okay," he said in a solemn tone. "Tell me what to do, and I'll fix it."

"You have to attach the outside cloth of the bra to the inside of the dress," I said in a matter-of-fact tone. "Enough so that it hopefully stays but not so much that you can see... And try not to spear my boob in the process."

He gave a serious nod. "Well, I'll do my very best."

Careful not to touch me in any way inappropriate, he fixed my little problem. The whole time he held his breath, brow furrowed in concentration, until he clasped the safety pin shut.

"There, my muse. All set. Nothing speared and no bra to be seen."

I reached up and embraced him, carefully this time. "Thank God, you're such a lifesaver. But maybe no crazy dance moves?"

He chuckled and planted a chaste kiss on my lips. "Agreed."

The rest of the evening passed in such a glorious blur that I could hardly remember it. Only one thing stood out apart from all the rest: the prom king and queen.

"The student council would like to announce this year's prom king and queen," said Bryan, the President of the senior class. "This year's king is: Jack Kowalski who will dance with his queen..."

He paused, embarrassed. A murmur swept the audience. 

"Nicole Storm."

Care and I exchanged glances as Jack stumbled to his feet as though drunk from shock. As if that wasn't enough of a surprise, Nicky sat in her seat, folding her arms. Refusing to move. 

When Jack tried to discreetly cajole her into joining him for the first dance to begin prom, she rose and left him standing there on the dance floor as everyone stared on in stunned silence. 

That was until my best friend saved the day. Care rushed toward him and put her arms around his neck as he grasped her waist, staring down at her with joyous relief. 

"Jack Kowalski will dance with his queen," said Bryan, "Carolyn Stavros."

He crowned both his best friend and mine with the ceremonial sashes, which thankfully didn't carry their names, while he placed a tiara on Care's head. She grinned and embraced Jack as Cher's "Believe" began to play. Meanwhile he couldn't take his eyes off the girl who'd saved him from public embarrassment. 

Soon other couples began to join them. 

"May I have this dance, my lady?" asked Eric as he kissed my hand.

"It would be my honor," I said.

Eric led me to the dance floor and began to lead me in a series of subtle dance moves that didn't require me raising my arms. Even though my classmates surrounded us, I imagined it was just me and him. Then he did what I dreamed about for years. 

He cradled me from behind as we danced, planting a tender kiss on my crown.

I closed my eyes, relishing the feeling of the music and his hands on my waist. When the song ended, he turned me to face him. Then came the exhilarating thrill of him dipping me low and pulling me up in a single, fluid moment. Without bursting my safety pins.

When I reopened my eyes, everyone had made room for us in the middle of the dance floor. Jack and Care led the cheering as Eric showed off all of our dance moves. 

"Go, Jess! Go, Jess!" they chanted. "It's your birthday! It's your birthday!"

"Who the hell is she dancing with?" someone asked.

"That's freaking Eric Stevens!" Carolyn shouted over the music.

"The nerd from last year? Nah, it can't be."

"They make such a damned cute couple," my best friend cried. "I loooooove it! My heart just can't take it anymore. Ahhhhh! I'm so proud of my girl!"

High on life, I cracked up laughing. Care began dancing with us in her awkward, nerdy way as Jack joined us. Before I knew it, a crowd of guys and girls swarmed us and joined in the fun.

They left queen bees Sarah and Nicky standing in a miserable heap with their grumpy dates in the far corner of the dance floor.

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