The rusty ceiling fan rolled slowly above and one of Monica Gandhi's best hit songs was playing on the radio. The living room seemed serene with the sparse furnishings of two sofa chairs and a new plastic chair settled at the left side of the room.
Pavish sat on the floor directly under the fan with her head resting on the table in the center of the room. She wore a black camisole and a blue baggy short that Bahan Deepika had given her after a year's use. With deep concentration, she bit her bottom lip trying to knit a deep blue sweater for her parents as their anniversary gift. She already had a matching one made for herself and hoped to wear it with the denim jean Bahan Deepika also gave her.
The sound of a heavy knock on the door jolted her from her work, making her heart skip a beat. Who could that be this early and so loud? She thought setting the woolen material and tools aside on the table.
"Coming!" She said in Hindi and went over to open the door. She stood in shock with her mouth open at the figure standing in front of her. Why was he here suddenly? Was he here to raise a commotion from the incident of yesterday? She thought. Her heart had long stopped beating and was now pounding hard now against her ribcage.
"Would you let me in or I do so myself?" Uncle Khan's tight commanding voice asked.
Pavish could not utter a word; she simply stepped back with shaking knees and allowed him come in. She squeezed the door handle tighter to keep from falling and watched him step into their house with his expensive shoes cloaked with mud and dirt from streets and the rainfall of last night.
"Namaste Uncle." She said and swallowed at the lump of fear that had risen to her throat. She blinked and watched his every reaction, trying to read the reason why he was there. Whatever it was, she knew it was trouble, especially when Mandisha had made a threat the previous day.
"Are your parents in?" He asked impatiently, ignoring her greetings. His eyes scanned the room accessing all they had. He looked at the creaking ceiling fan that Pavish had been enjoying only moment ago and frowned uncomfortably at it. He was dressed in black suit and looked in no mood for jokes.
"Get them!" He barked.
Pavish didn't need to move a step, the noise his voice made had already brought her mother in. Tanu appeared from her room with concerned frown on her face and then on seeing uncle Khan, the cause of the blather, a huge fake smile plastered across her cheeks.
"Namaste Bhai Khan, aap kaise hain?" (Hello brother Khan, how are you?) She asked in Hindi. Her hands were clasped together more tightly than the greeting demanded, making the veins on her lean hands very conspicuous. Mama opened her lips to utter another word of greeting when Papa rushed out. He was still wearing his faded cream night overalls that proved his was as surprised as everyone else.
"Ah! Khan? Namaste!" He said with a startled look on his face and gave a rumpled smile.
"Namaste Bhai." Khan said clasping his hands briefly and returned them to his back where he had them folded.
"Why are you here this early? I hope everything is all right?" Papa asked shifting his weight to his right hip with a hand placed on it.
"I too hope so, Bhai." He replied curtly.
"Have a seat then, let's talk." Papa said shaking his head softly.
Uncle Khan looked at the crumpling sofa that was torn at the edges exposing brown foam underneath. Most sides were patched with different pieces of clothing that conflicted with the sofa's original brown and green color. "No, I won't be long." He said shaking his head like he'd rather sit on hot coals.
"That's okay." Mama said trailing his eyes and noting his reason. "Do I at least get you some tea? We're about having breakfast and I made some. They're hot." She said when he hesitated.
"No, Bahan. I am fine." He said with a wave of his hand and turned to Papa with a firm look. "Did Pavish tell you what she did yesterday? At the short period she requested to get something to eat?" He asked narrowing his eyes.
The baffled and confused look he got from Pavish's parents urged him on, they knew nothing.
"I have been good to you, haven't I, Bhai? I paid for all your treatments and treated you myself, Bahan, you were sick, life-threatening disease. You remember? Now to pay me back you agreed to the arranged marriage I proposed between my friend, my business partner and your daughter, you remember?" He asked towering over them like they were little children.
Tanu's face blanched and she turned sickly pale. She wasn't happy one bit with the news she was hearing and where it was heading. She squeezed the edge of her sari tightly till her knuckles turned white. She swallowed and fixed her glassy stare at Uncle Khan. Her eyes always went that way whenever she was terrified and hiding tears.
Papa stretched his hands to his wife and held her waist tightly. He knew how much she hated being reminded that they sold her daughter to save her life. He knew how much she hated Khan for doing that. Why not one of his daughters if his business partner was so precious? She always asked when the matter was brought up and refused to hear more.
Pavish groped around for a chair and crumbled on it. She managed to lift up her eyes to her parents and the miserable sight she saw made her eyes roll into her head. Her head felt suddenly light and her vision darkened. She pressed her palms to the side of her head and rocked herself on her heels.
"You remember. I am good, am I not? I didn't ask you to pay me back all the money I spent for the kidney transplant. I only asked for this union, and you accepted. It will secure your daughter's future. Muhkya Ravi is wealthy, he is chief only! He is fifty-five, but good catch. Pavish would live better life." He said. He almost spat the word "better" like they should understand things and worship him for his goodness.
On a different day, Pavish would have paid attention to the way he lacked the use of the article "a" but today she wished she could just die or cease to exist. Her beauty had long become a curse to her since the very day the Muhkya (chief) noticed it and wanted her. In truth, he had in fact been the one that paid her mother's bills to the doctor, Khan, her very own uncle, just so he could have Pavish.
"Now, Pavish is going around, hanging with men! She is now ripe for marriage and wants it eagerly too." He said turning around to look at Pavish with disdain.
"I spoke to the Muhkya last night," he continued. "He wants his bride. He said to hold the wedding in one month! We have one month to prepare! One month!" He said forcing cheer into his voice.
He gave a loud laughter spreading his hands out for the first time and throwing them in front of him happily.
"Wedding to big man in one month! Are you not happy??" He shouted in English throwing his hands up again and giving a loud laughter that echoed through the room feeling like slaps on the skin of the family.
Mama, the best pretender couldn't even produce a smile. She still stood like she was frozen on the spot with her sari still clutched tightly in her hand. Papa shifted his weight again and nodded.
"Ji, a wedding in a month." Papa said in Hindi and nodded like he had just consented to Pavish's death. He looked up at Khan, his expression grave and Khan stopped rejoicing and stared at his elder brother. He stood silent for a second and it seemed like a thin line of conscience touched him, then smiled devilishly again.
"I'll take my leave now. Think of what you'd offer as dowry." He said looking round the small house again. "And think of something nice. He's rich man. You can call me if you need help. I'll be in touch." He said lastly and helped himself out.
Siddharth lollopped towards Pavish and jerked her to her feet with the firm grip of his hands on her arm.
"Pavish! What did you do? What did you do? I've been working tooth and nail, saving up money for months to redeem you, why did you hasten this? What did you do?" He asked angrily. He was close to tears and it was evident in his voice.
Tanu fell to the new blue plastic chair beside her and broke into sobs clutching at her chest. Papa turned and gave a sideward glance at her and shuddered. He felt torn apart seeing the love of his life in pieces like that. Agony was written over his face and he bit his quivering lips.
"Pavish!" He shouted raising his hand at her and stopped midway, his hand shaking vehemently in the air.
A loud ear-piercing scream escaped Pavish's lips and she shrieked. She stood with her eyes widened and stared at her father. That was the first time her father had raised his hand at her. Without thinking she dashed for the narrow passage that led to her room, entered it and closed the curtain behind her and crashed on the floor.
* * * *
Pavish sat coiled together at a corner in her bed. She bit her lips and rocked herself, fighting back the tears.
"I'm not going to cry. I'm not going to break down." She kept whispering over and again to herself like it was a mantra.
She was just not going to breakdown. She was strong. She was not going to disappoint her parents further or let them see how hard this decision was for her and how her heart was being torn apart.
"Pav," Tanu called softly peeping through the wrapper cloth Pavish used as a shield to separate her room from the direct view of the living room and everyone that walked into it. "May I come in?" Mama asked softly. She was so scared that any sound she made would tear at Pavish and cause her to bolt.
She sat gently on the bed beside Pavish and touched her flowing black hair.
"Mama!" Pavish cried wrapping her arms around her mother.
"Pavish... Pavish it's okay, I'm here. I'm here with you." She said in Hindi running her hand smoothly along Pavish's back. "It's going to be okay. It's going to be fine." She managed to whisper through clenched teeth.
Pavish had no idea when her dam burst open and hot tears that had welled up in her eyes began to flow and roll across her cheeks.
"Mama– mama." She whispered continuously.
Tanu felt a hot lash of pain on her chest. Pavish barely cried for anything. She was such a strong child that didn't take anything to heart. She didn't cry when she was denied a good life that all her cousins had. She didn't cry when she was forced to quit school and reject the scholarship. She didn't cry when the mention of the marriage came up, but here she was, sobbing in her arms.
"Pavish, I swear to you, I will buy you out of that marriage. I'll do anything I can. Beg anyone I can. Do any work. I'll do anything. Just do this for us for now." She said with tears in her eyes too.
Pavish cried louder pouring out her heart for the first time. She didn't want too much. She just didn't want to get married. Was that too much to ask? "I won't marry anyone else in life, just don't give me up to that man!" She warred in her heart.
"Dear Lord God!" She called out. "Papa believes strongly that you are there. Please, please, please help me! Help me this once only. I won't ask for more!" She cried shaking bitterly on her mother's lap.
Tanu held firmly to her, unsure of what to do or say in the moment. She felt the weight of how powerless she was being unable to care for her child, her only child. No other moment defined her as a failure better than this. She clenched her jaws to keep from breaking down too and began to rock Pavish softly. In the moment, she remembered something Pavish did whenever she was sad as a kid; she sang her most favorite hymn in Hindi
"Rock of Ages, cleft for me
let me hide myself in thee..."
"It's going to be fine, pyaara. It's going to be fine." She finally said sniffing.
* * * *
"Tanu!!! Happy Anniversary!!!!" Siddharth shouted.
Tanu shot up from the bed immediately in fright. The sunlight had already begun pouring into the room, casting a yellow shade on the cream colored walls. This was the finest room in their house. The bed was wide comfortable enough and there was even a T.V in it, one Pavish had forcefully brought in because her mother loved the soap operas. It was placed on a settee along with a large old radio and some cassettes resting on a rack. Siddharth and Pavish were on either sides of the bed, looking at her with bright eyes.
"What???" She yelled in English. Sitting upright and rubbing her eyes with her palm.
"It's your anniversary, mommy!" Pavish screamed joyfully with a bright smile that made the sun ashamed.
"Urrgh!" Tanu groaned, slumping her shoulders and holding her head in between her propped up hands.
She had barely gotten enough sleep the previous night from seeing her favorite series "Heart and Soul" by Sneha Manav, her favorite actress. There was no way she was missing out on that. Watching it was more like a race between her and the other housewives in the community, so she could have something to say when the others brought up the discussion. Those who couldn't contribute were secretly shamed for not having either power or a subscription to watch. She didn't want that reputation.
"That's why you both want to kill me?" She asked scowling.
"Quit being cynical! "Papa snapped in Hindi pulling her hands from her face and placing a small tray of gifts in them instead.
"You're too old for this, Romeo." She said in Hindi and looked up at him with affection in her eyes. She licked her lips and looked down to the tray and up at him again through her thick long lashes that Pavish greedily inherited.
"Kiss me already!" Papa said impatiently.
"Your dirty mouth? You haven't brushed your teeth." Mama said and Papa squeezed his face at her.
"No, you're the one with the dirty mouth. I'm properly clean." He said with a pursed lip.
"And you still want a kiss?" Mama asked frowning at him.
"Yes!"
"You're relentless!" Mama said laughing and kissed him.
Pavish felt tears that had welled up in her eyes spill to her cheeks. It was a little weird to see and other children would probably ask their parents to quit goofing around, but she felt sadness knowing she would never have that. Her parents were so lucky and they didn't know. Money didn't matter. Looking at them, she saw what true happiness meant and she was completely robbed off that.
She swallowed and turned away from them to wipe her cheeks. She didn't want to go about ruining their moment. She gave a soft cough and a fake smile when they turned to her.
"Here mom," she said bringing out the blue sweater she had knitted from a small brown bag on the floor and gave it to her mother, she held one out to her father too. "I made this for the both of you, I have a matching one too" she said.
"That's beautiful, my love. Thank you." Mama said and joyfully received it with a smile. She unwrapped it from the transparent nylon it was packaged in and fondled it happily.
"Thank you Pavish, God bless you." Papa said.
"Come, come Pav. Come sit here with me." Mama said patting the bed beside her with a bright smile in her face. Pavish hurriedly went over and resisted the strong urge to hug her parents. She bit her lips and opened her eyes inquisitively.
"Are you gonna dig into that, ma?" She asked looking at the tray that lay on her mother's lap.
Tanu gave a soft laugh and looked down at the tray. Siddharth had taken his time to buy her henna, a new shinny purple sari, kajal eyeliner, a necklace and some kind of note in a brown envelope. She smiled. A love letter? Can this man get any serious in his whole life? She asked taking the letter with pursed lips. She looked at him and waved it in front of him.
"What is this? Siddharth, you're too old to for this lovey-dovey." She said again with a slight shake of her head.
"Will you humor me only?" Papa said in almost flawless English and received shouts from Pavish and Tanu, even though Tanu didn't know what exactly that meant, it sounded so right. Mama took the letter and opened it with a flourish and was surprised at she saw.
"Pyaara, I told you not to be so dramatic. What is this? A trip or what?" She asked waving the letter in front of him. A questioning frown on her face.
"Ji, my love." He said smiling proudly.
Pavish snatched the letter from her mother's firm grip and read it. It simply said:
"Pack a bag for two weeks."
Papa wrote in Hindi in his illegible scratch of a handwriting. With confusion and excitement, Pavish looked up to her father. Her eyes expectant like a puppy's. "Papa where are you both going?" She asked.
Papa brought out three tickets from his pockets and flashed it at them. "The three of us are going to Goa. We are all going to lodge in the Golden Lake View Hotel for two weeks!" He announced. Mama looked at him in surprise and almost screamed in horror.
"No! That is so expensive! Are you out of your mind Siddharth? What for? Who are you borrowing from this time?" Without even letting him speak she continued, "We can't afford this trip. Cancel it. We're going nowhere!" She cried. The words she spoke were so firm and came out metallic, striking everyone.
Including Papa for some minutes.
Papa blinked and held his wife's hand in understanding, he knew her fear. They had already given their only daughter off and she was still dying from it. Just last week the episode had held in their living room with Khan, his brother. Pavish's face paled instantly as the understanding of what her mother said sunk in. And she looked to her father with widened eyes.
"Daadi remembered our wedding anniversary. This is her gift to us. She wanted us to spend some time together as a family." He said. "She also invited Vandisha and Patick and she is coming along as well." Papa said and mama quickly hugged him and began to cry.
"Just get ready" he sighed.
* * * *
Vandisha moaned for the fifth time that morning. She felt wobbly from the excitement and her knees danced unsteadily like they had been replaced with jelly. She couldn't remember the last time she felt this exhilarated about anything. She was happy. She was very happy to be here.
"Pav Pav, don't you just love the sight?" She exclaimed, barefaced.
She dragged her luggage behind her across the textured asphalt concrete into the large beautiful Hotel reception in admiration. Pavish was still astonished. She was yet to accept that this was actually happening.
Even after Papa's announcement the previous day, she had a difficulty believing it. Her mind was reluctant to process another visit to Golden Lake View in such short time. After her first visit, she had resigned and accepted that she might just never experience something so lavish again, but now she was here for a vacation. She never would have dreamed this. She was here to spend two weeks!
She gasped in awe at the magnificent building before her.
The Golden Lake View Hotel was an elaborate edifice of nine floors. The impressive lobby walls were painted ivory white with golden accents and millworks. There was a large reception desk at the center, painted gold and black with three pretty female receptionists in black suits behind them. The ceilings were painted white too, and multiple crystal chandeliers hung from them, making the halls very bright.
The lobby was furnished with large leather couches, half curve maroon red chairs and oak tables with frescoes and doreé ornaments. The flooring of the hotel was a deep black-and-white marble that contrasted beautifully with the ivory and gold art décor of the entry hall.
On the left of the hotel's lobby was the elevator and on the far right was the staircase that had an eye-catching chandelier at the center with over a thousand shimmering spheres dangling down the middle of the white spiral staircase from the top floors.
The hotel spoke of nothing but elegance, class and luxury.
This was bound to be the best two weeks of her life. And she vowed to enjoy it to the fullest and maximize every moment till she returned home and got married the next week. She dashed over to where her grandmother mother stood, talking to the receptionist and hugged her by the waist.
"God bless you, Daadi!!!" She bubbled, squeezing her tight for a moment before letting go.
"Ah!" Daadi exclaimed in surprise before turning to see that it was Pavish. "Oh!" She said smiling as everyone burst into laughter.
"You, baby only!" Papa said shaking his head and his hands, still with a proud smile on his face. Daadi hugged Pavish smiled.
"Now, run along with Vandu and Patick, let him show you to your rooms." She said as a handsome staff dressed in starched pristine white shirt and black pants showed up with keys in his hands. Vandisha, Patick and Pavish took their bags and muttered words of thanks to Daadi and followed the man who led them to the elevator.
"7th floor." Pavish noticed was where he was taking them. "Why so far?" She asked inquisitively.
"A special room for you." He whispered, winking at her with a small smile and Pavish noticed the dimples on his freshly shaven cheeks. "Why did he have to be so handsome?" She thought blinking and steered her eyes away from him quite sure that her face was all red.
"How long have you been working here?" Patick asked in hopes to start a conversation and it worked well for him. The staff responded and they continued in a conversation. Vandisha edged closer to Pavish and shared her opinion.
"Damn, that's a fine man! So is every other person working here. This is going to be the best two weeks!" She said with a wink and bit her bottom lip. And Pavish narrowed her eyes at her. She knew Vandu had a fancy for cute guys, not like she was indifferent, but Vandisha had a tendency to obsess.
Vandisha stepped gingerly behind the staff immediately they were out of the elevator, looking for opportunities to touch him. Pavish took hold of her kameez top and tugged at it.
"Be responsible!" She whispered through clenched teeth. Vandisha looked at her over her shoulder and scoffed.
"This guy- is mine." She mouthed in Hindi.
The staff came to a stop before a room and held out an electronic key card to the ladies, waiting for who would receive it first. Vandisha rapidly reached out and took the key from him with her fingers brushing his and lingering till he became uncomfortable and began to look flustered. Pavish pressed her hand over her mouth to stifle a giggle that threatened to burst from her lips. Patick looked in confusion at Vandisha directly.
"Please, show me to my room." He said and the disoriented staff came around.
"Yes, please. This way." He replied, coughing slightly and resumed walking ahead a few steps.
Patick looked back over his shoulder and shook his head at Vandisha and she winked in return. He knew exactly what she was about. Pavish snatched the key from Vandisha and swiped it across the door and walked in.
"Pav Pav!!! Did you see that?" Vandisha asked laughing. She walked into the room excitedly, it was so obvious how thrilled she felt.
"Have you seen this?" Pavish asked in awe, standing still at the entrance of the room for a moment with her hands over her mouth. She walked in slowly, imagining the awaiting comfort for the rest of her stay.
"This room is- heaven. Don't wake me if I'm dreaming!" Vandisha squealed standing in place by the door post. She dropped her bag to the floor and exchanged glances with Pavish.
"Oh. My. God" She mouthed. It was hard to believe this was going to be their room for the next two weeks!
The room was fairly large and painted with soft pink. The interior designs were also done in light pink, wine and deep red. The beauty of it made her heart pound. There was a queen-sized bed, at the far left of the room, just before the window. The bed was dressed with pale pink sheets, white pillows and a deep red flower patterned duvet was draped around it. Each of the four pillows in white had the hotel's logo on it, hand stitched with lighter shades of pink, red, and green. They were fluffy and soft to the touch.
A deep pink rug covered the floorboards of the room which Pavish walked on now. Vandisha watched her feet sink into the softness of it as she walked across to settle herself on the bed. On the far right of the room, was the wardrobe. Burgundy- somewhere between wine and maroon. Opposite it, there was a furnished dressing table with a leather chair polished gold. A beautifully framed mirror was secured to the wall above the dressing table. Pavish stood beside it, admiring the constructive linings on it. Close to the entrance was a door that led to the bathroom. Same color with the wardrobe.
She walked to the window, it was hidden behind the sealed pink curtains. Pavish drew them open and gasped. She turned to Vandisha, an amused look on her face. Vandisha dropped the pillow she was fondling and rushed to the window, there was something to be seen. Awestruck at the sight, she moaned again in pleasure.
"Who owns this place?" She marveled.
"Heaven knows." Pavish replied softly.
The view from the window was targeted directly at the lake. The sun was shining brightly on the large pure lake, giving it a golden sheen. They were lucky enough to have been given this room that was at the extreme on the seventh floor. The sight was phenomenal and breathtaking.
"This is why they call it the Golden Lake View." Vandisha announced and Pavish couldn't argue with that.
She remained there, gazing outside interestedly while Vandisha edged away and settled on the bed. She ran her hands along the covers and smoothed them again. She resumed touching every single thing in sight and summed off by falling back on the bed. She sat back up to stare again at the place.
"I'm amazed." She finally said.
"Do you think our matrimonial bed will be this lovely?" She asked. Pavish turned to look at her for a moment and a lump formed in her throat. She swallowed at it and tried to dismiss the thought.
"Perfect timing, Vandu." She said rolling her eyes and went to sit on the bed beside her. She pouted and sighed. She might as well come to terms with that fact because it would not be changing anytime soon.
She looked at Vandisha again and now tears had welled up in her eyes. Her heart sank for her sister, she knew what Vandisha wanted to say but couldn't. She drew closer to her and wiped off the tears from her face with the back of her palm. She took her hand in hers and squeezed them gently, saying a little prayer.
"It'll be okay." She assured her.
She had just asked God to dry up all their tears the way she had just done for Vandu. She couldn't picture how that was going to happen. Was it the marriage? The poverty? Or the pain and rejection? Which of them was "all" whichever it was, Pavish knew she could trust God and stop questioning. Even if it just didn't happen.
Vandu sniffed and sat up. "We might as well enjoy what much we have here now. Thank God for Daadi." She said.
"Yeah... who would believe Pavish Noah Patel would be here twice in one month?" Pavish asked smiling. It was not a sad one.
Vandisha got to her feet and started humming the most popular song that month, "Chand Ka Tukda". She wasn't the best dancer, she wasn't even close to whoever might come last at any dance competition, but she enjoyed moving her body. She danced noisily around the room, putting on an entertaining show for Pavish who didn't care to hide her laughter at Vandisha's terrible dancing.
"I enjoy watching you embarrass yourself." The saving grace of Patick's knock jolted Vandisha's and sent her sitting calm. Pavish kept laughing in mockery as Patick poked his head through the door.
"Come on in, Patick." She said.
"Thanks." He said with a smile and stepped in.
"Vandu, I noticed you earlier. You can never get a good man like that." He said rebuking her.
"Trust me, she feels chastised already." Pavish said with a strict face trying to hide her laughter but failed to and snorted. Vandisha rewarded her with an indignant look that made her laugh even harder.
"You might as well own up to the fact." Patick said still brooding over Vandisha. He always talked with authority and he was the ever reasonable one; too reasonable for his own good because no one was that smart and straightforward these days with that much courage to say hard truths. It was nice, but most times, he got on the nerves of everyone, including Pavish.
Vandisha rolled her eyes and stood up. "Yes Bhai." She said with a deceptive fake smile and patted his arm. "I need F and F" she said disinterestedly.
"And what the heck is that?" Patick asked.
"Food and Fresh air" Pavish replied dryly.
"You're so antique you know." Vandisha said suddenly wondering how he survived in life being this backward.
"I'm not an object. Only objects are antique." He said.
"Urrghh!" She groaned. "I give up!" She announced lifting her hands up in the air and throwing them back down.
"Let's go for a swim or a brief walk." Pavish said and they all consented.
"Yaayyy! Something goes." She muttered to herself.
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