Chapter 15: Dream Lover (Izza's POV)
It has been a few weeks since the boys found out the truth. They have been so happy. I can't get enough of hearing them call me mom. I am happy, but still upset with Devon. He hasn't locked me in a room and ignored me. He hasn't even tried to keep me in the house. I just haven't left. I feel embarrassed by what happened here that day. How would I explain all of that to my friends?
Dev has taken up the habit of sleeping in my bed. I don't invite him in. I just wake up with him wrapped around me like I'm going to disappear. I think that is his greatest fear. That one day he will wake up and I will be gone. I have threatened to leave, but here I am. I don't know if I would have been able to go through with it on my birthday. Even with being as pissed as I was.
Today I woke up alone though and decided to go for a run. Bella hasn't been out in so long. I think it will be good for her. She has been even quieter lately the usual.
I wrapped a large beach towel around myself and headed out to my designated area. I quickly shifted but found that Bella was less than excited to be let out. She just laid on the grass and sunned herself. She did not run and jump like she normally would. I still let her stretch her paws for about an hour before wrapping the towel back around myself and heading to the house. The towel is just easier than dressing and undressing in the woods.
As I entered the kitchen, I was meet by none other than Devon. Now I wish that I had more than a towel on. He offered me a cup of coffee and I accepted it by walking towards him.
As I came closer his eyes darkened, as he realized all I was wearing was a towel. I grabbed the cup and leaned against the counter taking that precious first sip and letting it hit my soul. Devon moved behind me and placed his hands on either side of me on the counter.
"What good deed did I do to earn you in just a towel baby." He said nuzzling into my neck. He took it upon himself to slide his hands into the slit of the towel and found both of my nipples in the blink of an eye. Rolling each in his fingers leaving me lost in the incredible feeling of it. I heard his zipper slide down and felt his pants hit the floor at my feet.
"Dev, I.. I... Please don't tease me."
"Who's teasing baby." And with that, he entered me from behind. He started off gentle so I could get used to the size of him but once I was moaning he picked up his pace. He still had a firm grip on my nipple and pinched and pulled on them as he continued to pump in and out of me.
I should be telling him no and walking away, but I need this. I already feel all of my stress melting away and building in my lower region as it prepares to explode. I'm was already crying out "I'm coming, I'm coming" as my core tightens around him. He's was just not finished yet. He keeps it up and going until I've came and went three times. He finally stilled behind me using the towel I was wearing to catch most of our conjoined love juice as he pulled out of me. I felt like I was going to melt on the kitchen floor when I felt myself being nudged from behind. Again already. No!
That's when I woke up and realized that the real Devon was in bed with me. He has a very strained look on his face. The sheet over his body is in full tent mood over his lower extremities.
"If you keep having sex dreams about me baby, I'm going to make them a reality whether you consent or not." Dev has been really good. Other than some crude comments, he hasn't pushed or asked anything of me. He just has had a hard time keeping his distance, because our bond has grown. It has been worse for him because he never accepted it before.
"Who said I was dreaming of you?" Lies all lies. I know but he doesn't need to know I was dreaming about how good it felt to have him buried deep inside me.
"You did, as you were moaning my name. Oh Dev, oh Dev, yes harder, faster, right there. Then you started shouting, I'm coming, I'm coming over and over, again and again. I loved that. It let me know, even in your dreams, I give you multiple orgasms. I enjoyed it, just not as much as you seemed to." He said while he wrapped his arms around me and pressed his hardness into me. Showing off just how much he enjoyed it.
"Get off me perv," I told him as I got out of bed.
"Oh, I was getting off on it. The only thing that would be better, is if I had the live show, not just the audio."
"Keep dreaming."
"Oh I will, and I know you will too." He said pulling back the blankets, showing himself off in all of his naked glory. I closed my eyes trying to remind myself why I kept my distance from my mate. "You keep dreaming of me, and I promised you we will make it a reality whenever you are ready. Until then it is rosy palm for me and wet dreams for you. All you have to do is ask and I will do whatever you want me to do to you. However, you want it done."
And on that note, I entered my bathroom to take a cold shower. I was definitely more than slick between my legs from my dream, but the beginning of it was more disconcerting than anything. Dreaming about Dev was nothing new. I have been doing that for the last three years, but the part about Bella being down worried me. I think it's that, even though I have been here for three years, she still hasn't met Dex. I think that their time needs to come sooner rather than later. Since Devon seems to be on board, he shouldn't object. He did just say all I had to do is ask and I could have him however I want him, whenever I want him.
The shower door was opened and Devon joined me in the shower. Crap. I forgot to lock the door. This has been happening more and more lately too. He reached out and took the sponge from my hand and worked on scrubbing and rubbing my shoulders, and then worked his way down. He made sure I was perfectly clean from head to toe while lingering on his favorite spots in between. I was taking a cold shower for a reason, damn it Dev. Now I'm nearly panting in need.
As soon as I was clean, I left him wanting in the shower. I hope he enjoys blue balls Monday. I dried and dressed before he came out with a towel hanging low around his waist. Damn, he looks good. He kissed my cheek, leaving to go to his room to get dressed for the day.
I made my way to the kitchen and couldn't help but stare at the spot, that I had been bent over in my dream. My cheeks reddened at the thought.
"Hmmm... What's got, you blushing mate? Don't tell me, your dream was here in the kitchen."
I just smiled and went to fill my coffee cup. Something about it tasted off this morning, so after just one sip, I poured it out. Maybe my creamer has gone bad. Dev raised an eyebrow at me but continued on with his own cup. I went about making breakfast for everyone. Bacon in the oven and French toast on the stove. We were shortly followed by Kelly, Jax, and the boys.
"Yay mommy made French toast. I love French toast. Thank you, mommy. Did you know it was my favorite?" Xavier exclaimed.
"No it's my favorite, " Xander argued back. "Don't tell mommy it's your favorite, when you know it's mine."
"That's enough boys. There is no need to argue over this. It can be both of your favorite." Devon said to the boys giving them a stern look. At this, they sat and quietly ate their food. Dev got up kissed me on my temple and whispered, "I'll see you later baby." In my ear before shouting a love you to the boys and heading out with Jax and Kelly close behind.
I made my own plate and sat to eat. I got about halfway through my breakfast when I had to run to the bathroom. My breakfast was making a second appearance, as it came back up. What is wrong with me. The last time I was sick was..... Oh no. The last time I was sick was because I had horrible morning sickness with the boys.
It's been exactly four weeks since my birthday and I don't remember having my period. Crap. Crap. I know Kelly has some extra pregnancy tests in the guest bathroom because they having been trying to have a pup forever. Apparently, I don't even have to try with Dev. We have sex and he hits the mark both times. I bet that's why I have been having such vivid sex dreams, and why Bella has been feeling so off too. Before confirming my suspicions, I got the boys' cartoons rolling in the living room and a few toys to keep them occupied. I grabbed the monitor, so I could keep tabs on them and headed to the guest bathroom.
I sat and did my business which involved peeing on a stick. I decided to pee on two of them just to be sure. I sat on the toilet as I waited the allotted time on both, and they both came back positive. Fuck.
How was Dev going to react to this? Was he going to be happy, upset, mad? He could really only be mad at himself. He neither wore a condom nor pulled out that night. Did he want this? Was this his plan?
Am I happy about this? Yes and no. I love my kids and have always wanted a big family, but I don't know how this fits in with my mate's issue. I pulled off my tank top and checked over my body in the full-length mirror. I did seem to have a little extra weight in my abdomen and my boobs definitely felt fuller and really sensitive. I had about two weeks before it would become noticeable, and I would have to make sure no one caught me being sick. I know this is something I have to tell the Alpha about, but I was just not ready to yet. I will not wait six months this time though. That is for sure.
I went back out and made myself some toast knowing that would help settle my stomach. There will be no fried eggs and spam this time. Just thinking about it made me want to get sick again. I took a few deep breaths and managed to keep my second breakfast down.
I spent the day teaching the boys their alphabet like we have been working on. I think they will be starting Preschool in a few weeks. I'm both excited and sad about this, but knowing I'm pregnant again, it will be best if they are in school.
At around two, I put a whole chicken in the roaster for dinner, set the timer for three hours on low, and laid on the couch while the boys played. I watched four episodes of Paw Patrol before I passed out.
I was gently nudged awake by Devon when he came in.
"Hey baby, you feel asleep. If you're not up for making dinner, I can go grab us something."
"No, it's fine I have a chicken in the roaster, and just have to go put on the mac and cheese and green beans." I felt queasy as I got up, but it quickly passed.
"Oh, okay. Sounds delicious. Almost as delicious as you." He said kissing my cheek and heading to the stairs to go change into something more comfortable. The something comfortable was just a pair of gym shorts and nothing else. He walked into the kitchen that way, while I was finishing up everyone's plates. I turned and there he was still glistening wet from the shower, muscles on show and his shorts hanging low to show a very happy trail leading to his favorite appendage.
I closed my eyes and tried to even out my breathing before I started panting again. I felt the wetness grow between my legs and cursed my damn pregnancy hormones, on top of the mate bond, for putting me through this torture.
Devon stopped at the entrance, and his eyes grew dark. He could smell the situation he had caused when he entered the room. Both he and Dex were enjoying the effect. Thankfully at that moment, everyone else joined us in the kitchen to have dinner.
"Izza," Devon spoke between bites.
"Yes, Alpha," I responded automatically.
He growled. "You are my mate. Please don't call me Alpha." I nodded and he continued "I need you to join me at an appointment tomorrow. The Elders have some questions about your origins, and I think it's time they learned the truth. I think everyone should know the truth. I want to announce you as my Luna."
My jaw hit the floor. He's going to admit that he lied. That he has been lying to the Elders, for three years now. When did he decide this? He also wants to tell the pack and announce me as Luna. I started to hyperventilate, as I was not able to take all this in right now. Pregnant. Mate. Luna. I ran from the table and to my room. I locked the door behind me and continued running to my bathroom. I locked that door too and turned on my shower to muffle the sounds as I got sick. Morning sickness doesn't just happen in the mornings and when I get upset it will come any time of the day.
When everything was gone from my stomach, I got into the shower. I removed the evidence of the clammy sweat that had covered me and when I was done I swished some mouth wash to remove the nasty taste from my mouth. I came out wrapped in a towel and Devon was knocking on my door.
"Izza, are you okay? Talk to me please."
I opened the door and motioned for him to join me. "I'm fine. You just caught off guard is all. I needed a moment alone to process everything. When did you decide on all of this? What does it mean? Devon, what do you want from me?" I whispered the last sentence.
We sat together on the end of my bed, and he turned towards me while holding both of my hands. "I want what we should have had when we first met. I want you as my mate. I don't want the lie. If I could go back and erase it, I would. I would go back to The Claiming and treat you right. We would still have our boys, but I would have been there by your side the whole time. I wouldn't have fucked around with every unmated female on the island, while I had you. You would have been and should have been the only one in my bed every night. I have been a fool for so long and all I want to do now is try to make it right. I know you may never fully trust me, but I need you to know that this is real. Izza, I love you."
"I... I... I don't know what to say Dev. We have had such a rocky relationship, and you are right I don't trust you. I have seen a change in you lately. I have seen that change in how you feel about me as your mate. Maybe with the lie gone, the rest will fall into place."
"That's fair. Thank you Izza." He said and wrapped his arms around me and nuzzled gently into my neck breathing in my scent. "Can I sleep here tonight?"
"Dev, you sleep here most nights."
"I know, but tonight I would like to come to bed when you do and not have to wait for you to be asleep before I sneak in. I sleep so much better with you. I have people coming this week to completely remodel my room. I'd like it to become our room. I want your influence on the design. I want it to be a place that you want to be in. You don't have to decide to move into my room with me yet. I just want to let you know that I do have plans for us. I want to keep you involved in them this time around, and if you think it's a bad idea I want you to tell me." He leaned in and lightly kissed my lips. He kissed me again holding on for longer. He tried to deepen the kiss, but I knew if I let him, we wouldn't stop there. He pulled back breathing hard, giving me a small smile before kissing the top of my head and leaving me alone in my room.
Once dressed in a tank and shorts, I went to find the boys. They were bouncing around the living room with Devon playing some game. I sat and watched with a genuine smile on my face. I think my fairytale may have started today. My life has taught me not to trust, and to expect to be failed by everyone, but I just want to enjoy this moment before the other shoe drops.
Around eight, I made the boys settle down and watch a cartoon before it was bath time followed shortly by bedtime. I had gotten up to grab the tv remote, so I could change the cartoon. When I came to sit back down Devon was sitting in my normal place. I went to sit next to him, and he pulled me into his lap. "This is where my mate should sit." Devon proclaimed. I smiled as I snuggled into him. Trying to avoid his happiness, that was very evident, of having me in his lap.
After bath time, I got the boys tucked into bed and read them a story, as I sat in the rocker in their room. While I read to them, I kept a hand on my stomach. I was thinking of the new bundle of joy that would be joining us and was hoping that this time we would do this right. Hoping that the path that we are on now is the one that will lead us to happily ever after. I sat there listening to the boys snore as if it was the greatest sound in the world because it is. Knowing they are safe and loved in their beds is the best feeling as a parent.
Before hunting Devon down to go to bed, I made my way back to the kitchen to get a glass of water. I leaned against the kitchen island, while still lost in my thoughts of the pup growing inside of me. Devon had entered at some point and came behind me and held me close in his arms. He was so gentle as he dipped his head to kiss my mark. I moaned without even thinking and he kissed it again. This time gently sucking and nibbling on my sensitive spot. It took everything in me not to respond by rubbing my rear into his very hard front.
"So what was I doing exactly in this dream that had you blushing this morning mate?" He whispered into my ear.
"Don't you wish you knew?"
"I do, but I can always create my own fantasy and act it out for you."
"You may be able to, but not tonight. Let's go to bed. I'm still tired and we have a lie to erase tomorrow."
Devon sighed, as he grabbed my hand and pulled me to my room. He was still just in his gym shorts, and I was in a tank and sleep shorts, so when he snuggled up against me I could feel his happiness press against me. It just wasn't time to give in. He still has a lot to prove. A lot to make up for. Not long after, he was snoring softly behind me with his left hand directly over my small bump. I drifted to sleep myself, feeling warm and happy in my mate's embrace.
I could try to fight this feeling, but that's the problem. Dev fought it and we still ended up here. I could try to fight it now and things could end up even worse for us. For our pups. I'm not just going to roll over and give in but I see a future with my mate. A future that includes a new arrival.