Emma's POV
Mom texted me that she'll be here later, which is a great thing actually
I finished my painting today, it's a beautiful flower girl alone in a garden
Every new painting is my new favorite, although I don't really get the confidence to flex my works, I love 'em
I'm on my phone now, hindi ko pa rin pinansin ang mga messages ni Marcus
Pero sa totoo lang, pwede naman akong masasaktan dba? Feelings ko 'to
Pero past niya 'yon tapos nasaktan siya, hindi naman niya balikan ang nanakit sa kanya dba?
Pero hindi nga imposible, sa picture pa lang, ma fefeel mo talagang nagmamahalan silang dalawa noon.
Pumasok si Rosa sa room ko, dala-dala yung pagkain ko for lunch
"San galing mga snacks na yan?", she asked
"Kay Clent, he gave it to me yesterday, pwede naman ako nito dba?"
She just smiled and placed the plates beside my works
"May bagong estudyante dito sa floor niyo", sabi niya
"Oh...she or he?"
"Si Meryl Loe Padilla, kanina lang nag move in"
Linigpit ko ang mga gamit ko para kumain na ako
"Ahh...anong meron sa kanya?", I asked
"Cancer, galing siya sa ibang hospital. Hindi ko alam kung bakit sila nag change ng hospital. She's not really looking good out there"
I just smiled
"Nagbabakasakaling lang baka gusto mong makipag friends sa kanya"
I didn't looked at her, she knew the pain
"Honey..", she draw herself near me
"No, its okay Rosa, subukan ko", sabi ko
"Thanks ", ngumiti siya at lumabas sa room ko
Yeah, we are not getting better kaya minessage ko kaagad si Marcus
Ngunit offline
Convo: Marcus Valenzona
Emma: Wanna check on the new resident?
Nag online siya kaagad
Marcus: Saw her, marami siyang dala
: pero salamat ha, pinansin mo na ako, ano ba kasi ang nangyari
I sent him a rolling eyes emoji
Emma: wala, see you laters
I smiled as I turned off my phone
Namimiss ko nga si Marcus sa totoo lang, hindi rin naging madali sa'kin ang pag-iiwas sa kanya
Eh bat naman kasi iniiwasan ko siya
Hindi ko na talaga maintindihan sarili ko
-------------------------
Ang gwapo ni Marcus ngayon, nag suot siya ng isang grey beannie, white plain tshirt with black jacket and black shorts and his oxygen tube, holding his dextrose
"Hey"
Simple lang naman sa'kin, cute pink v-neck tshirt with black shorts
"Hey, good to see you again my friend", Marcus uttered
I rolled my eyes at him, "what?", he asked
"What room is she in?"
"325"
"Okay, mauna na ako", sabi ko with a smile
Naglakad na ako patungo sa room ni Meryl, leaving him behind
"Hoy, ano ba kasi problema mo?", he catches up
"Wala nga sabi"
"Eh nung nalaman mo tungkol kay Margarette, nagkakaganyan ka na, bakit?"
Tumingin ako sa kanya, "hala siya"
"Oh ano? Pag uusapan nga natin. Anong ginawa ni JM sayo?", wala namang galit sa tono ng boses niya, curiousity lang
I rolled again my eyes at him
"Knowing you, ang salitang 'wala lang', may meaning parin"
I stopped infront of Meryl's room, open lang yung room niya
"Ganyan naman kayo mga babae dba?", huminto rin siya, "hoy, nakikinig ka ba?"
Nakita ko si Meryl, naglalaro sa phone niya
"Shouldn't you be listening to your boyfriend kaysa mangi-alam ka sa'kin?", sabi niya at tumingin sa'min
Who? Me?
Tiningnan ko si Marcus, tumingin rin siya sa'kin
"Oh no, we're not.."
"He's not.."
"Hindi kami.."
We laughed akwardly, Meryl teased us with her look
Kaya umayos ako, "hindi kami, walang kami" at tumingin na naman kay Marcus, "may iba 'to"
He left out a sarcastic tone
Tumayo si Meryl sa iniupuan niya, "Eh ikaw may gusto sa kanya", sabi niya sa'kin, "I'm Meryl, Meryl Loe Padilla", pagpapakilala niya sa'min
Short hair siya like as in boy cut, understandable naman 'yon, kasi nga may cancer siya
Tapos nagsusuot siya ng light orange tshirt with a big white heart nasa center ng tshirt at maong shorts.
Obviously, she's unhealthily skinny.
"Ako naman si Emma, at siya si Marcus", turo ko kay Marcus
Nakita ko ang dextrose stand sa tabi niya, I wonder why Marcus didn't bring his today
She smiled
"Matagal na kayo dito?", tanong niya
"Ahm yeah, a month or 2", sagot ko
"Yep", maikling sagot ni Marcus, at lumapit don sa dextrose stand ni Meryl,
Nakakapagod rin namang dalhin 'yon, stuggle kaya everytime kapag pupunta kami ng roof top
Eh mas nakakapagod parin pag wala
"salamat", sabi niya kay Meryl
Hindi ko alam kung ano pa yong sinasabi niya bilang pang introduction, marami 'yon, nagtagal kami doon sa room niya.
Mabait siyang tao, I like her kasi hindi siya mahiyain, she's so easy to be with, and she makes you feel comfortable.
"Fungal Pneumonia, that's rough", she said as she leaned back to the wall
Nandito na kami sa itaas ng building, nagwawatch na naman ng sunset.
"Yeah, sure is, we all got it rough", respond ni Marcus habang tumitingin sa aming dalawa
She nods to agree, "And Alport Syndrome right?"
"Yeah, never knew about it, it's rare", I said
"Yep, parang bago", she said, "Pero the fact na nag stay ka dito sa hospital is new too, from what I knew, pwede ka lang namang pumunta rito for check ups or dialysis"
Oo nga, tama siya, pero pinili ko parin 'to over the reason that I thought I could give my mom a more comfortable life and me staying at home does not help it
Pero Im not sure about that
Totoo, si mama lang yung rason ko sa pag charge dito, dba?
"Well, obviously, pinili ko nalang mag full time dito. Atleast may nagfofocus na sa'kin, treatments and meds, schedules, all in their hands"
"Wala kabang gustong gawin? Alport Syndrome is a kidney disease, okay? Which can allow you pa naman to do things, bigger things than Marcus and I could ever do", she said
I catch a glimpse of Marcus
She's right, she's so right na sa una palang, hindi ko naman gusto maging ganito, na mukhang walang freedom kasi nga sa hospital nalang nagsastay, even though I'm still allowed to do things
I so hated the feeling of not being free, kaya nga siguro depress na depress ako nang malaman ko 'tong sakit na to
"You're probably right"
"Well yeah, damn Im right", you can hear the sarcasm
Marcus let out a chuckle
"Pero kung hindi lang dahil sa sakit na'to, o sa desisyon kong mag stay dito, I wouldn't probably met you guys", I paused and faced the sunset, "Some true and great friends", I smiled at her and she smiled back, "maybe I didn't got to do what I want to do, but even if I didn't stay here, for sure hindi ko parin magagawa ang mga bagay na gusto ko"
They both stared at me, "duwag ito eh", turo ko sa puso ko
Puno ako ng takot nuon, I was so down that I thought I can't get back on my feet again. Maraming gustong gawin ngunit hindi naman gumagawa o kumikilos para makamit 'yon. Never knew I'll reach this far
And that's the bad thing about being ill, being sick. Kailangan mo nang constant assurance, constant encouragement dahil matatakot ka e, matatakot ka kahit anong deny mo, kahit gaano mo pang i-insist na maniwalang okay lang ang lahat, may takot parin
My eyes are getting teary kaya tumalikod ako at tumingin na naman sa sunset.
I heared them getting closer, "then let's be stronger, let's be braver together", Meryl said
I am happy I met her, kahit ngayong hapon ko palang siya nakilala, ang saya-saya ko nang nakilala ko siya.
I grabbed her by the waist and drag her near me para ma aakbayan ko siya.
Mas lumapit si Marcus sa'min at, nandon sa kabilang side ni Meryl at inakbayan niya siya.
Ang saya sa feeling.
Sana maka survive kaming lahat sa sakit na'to.
------------------
Pag balik ko sa room, nandoon na mama ko
I'm guessing that my mom is starting not to like staying here, oh well, can't blame her
"Hi ma", I greeted her as soon as I saw her
"Aba? Good mood ata?", she uttered
"I met another friend", I replied
She's busy finding something in her bag, "Yep, I've heard", she paused, "Is she nice though?"
"Sobra, komportable ngang makasama eh", sabi ko
Dumiretso ako sa bed ko, "that's great hon", I heard her say
Binuksan ko phone ko para mag message kay Clent, sinend ko sa kanya ang selfie namin kanina, "new friend🤞"
She stopped finding the thing she's busy finding with at humarap sa'kin, "Punta lang ako sa car saglit, baka nandoon lang yung glasses ko"
"Okay ma"
Convo: Clent Bandalan
Emma: *Sent A Photo*
:new friend🤞
Clent: ayos ah!
Hmmp ang cold
Clent: Kailan punta niyo sa sementeryo?
I froze as I saw his message
It's been a few years
Emma: Don't know
Cold kong reply
Emma: How's tita, by the way?
Pag che-change ko sa topic
I closed my phone as Rosa entered my room, "I do hope you didn't had an early dinner"
I smiled at her, "how's the new one?", she asked
Inilapag niya pagkain at meds ko sa mini table tabi sa bed ko
"She's so nice", I gladly said
She chuckled, "Well, I hope you three will be bestfriends"
I went quiet for awhile, thinking about something while Rosa turned away to get me some water
While she was pouring it, "she'll not last, right?", a stupid question came out from my mouth
I don't mean to disrespect Meryl but I don't want her to disappear, I don't want to lose her
You can say na ang dali ko lang ma attach, but hindi lang ako ang ganito, we all do feel like this when we meet new people, especially kapag may naibibigay na ang tao sa iyo
She probably froze at my question, she turned to face me, "I don't know honey, maybe yes, maybe no"
I don't like what I'm hearing, I somehow hate how Rosa is unsure of some things, but I can't blame her because of that, it's not like she really knows everything
"Oh hi Rosa, hinahanap pa kita, nandito kalang pala", sabi ni mama
She put the water beside my plate, "here you go honey"
"I just wanted to let you know that I'll be bringing Emma tomorrow sa cemetery, will you let Doctor Galvez know?"
Narinig ko si mama, what? Hindi pa siya pumunta kanina?
I looked at her while taking a spoon of my food
"Okay, I'll let her know", kinuha na ni Rosa ang mga gamit at lumabas
"Hindi kapa pumunta kanina ma?", I asked her while she's looking at her paper works
"Hindi pa, we'll visit your father together", she replied, still focusing on the papers
Tumahimik nalang ako
I don't actually know what to feel, I mean, I love my dad, ofcourse, but I'll be seeing his grave, which ang cause ng pagkamatay niya ay ang sakit na'to
I just don't know when will I die, but for sure ako na ang susunod
Binuksan ko na naman phone ko,
Convo: Clent Bandalan
Clent: Okay lang naman, e si tita ba? I rarely see her
Emma: We'll go there by tomorrow, mom insisted I should go with her.
Pumunta ako sa instagram para mag post sa mga pictures na kinuha ni Clent the other day.
Habang nag iisip ng mai ca-caption, nakita ko ang message ni Clent, "okay, see you then"
Hindi ko nalang pinansin ang message niya, pinost ko nalang ang picture na walang caption at tinurn-off ko yung phone ko
Pagkatapos kong kumain, nag ready nalang ako for bed at natulog.
It was a nice day