the record player was full blast when I entered the shop.
'you can drive all night
looking for the answers in the pouring rain
you wanna find peace of mind
looking for the answer'
the lyrics echoed in the empty space, no costumers to be found. the lights that were once all on when I drove by, now set dimly.
the door closed behind me, the same old bell ringing. I wrapped my arms around my body, the air condition on full blast.
I made sure my footsteps were as quiet as possible so I wouldn't grab his attention from where ever he was in the shop.
i knew he was here.
my eyes trailed up to the back lounge where Luke had taken me the first time we met. I decided to trail the rows and rows of records first.
the first aisle I walked down, there were records all scattered on the floor. albums of love, of money, of sex, of cheating.
I took in a deep breath kneeled down to pick up a broken record. this boy was a mess.
turning to the next aisle, Luke was no where to be found. this was the aisle where we first met. I gazed through the peeks and cracks of the shelve to get a view of the aisle next, but still no sight of the boy.
that's when I decided to head upstairs.
the steps creaked due to the fact that they were old and wooden. I placed a hand on the door knob, staring blankly at the door.
I bit down on my lower lip and brought in some air. I knew he was in here. I just had a feeling.
slowly the door swung open, the room pitch black, the only light coming from that one window.
and there he was.
his legs brought up to his check, sitting on the wooden floor. he stared mindlessly out the window, capturing the California sun. he had his headphone in his ears, obviously not hearing me enter. his head rested on his knees and his arms wrapped around his legs.
I spun and shut the door behind me, being alone in a pitch black room.
my dirty hightop blue converse skidding their way over to Luke. I tried to be as quiet as possible.
and I stopped as soon as I was right behind him. I stood there. and watched as his chest slowly lifted and fell. his droopy eyes forcing their way to stay open. his music loud enough for me to hear through the headphones.
I blew out the breath I had been saving in and put a firm grasp on his shoulder, causing him to jump at my touch.
his head flew around to face me, tearing one headphone out of his ear, the other still in.
he squinted his eyes at me, running his tongue over his lip and just stopping at the ring.
we didn't speak a word.
I made my way next to him and sat myself down. I as well brought my legs up to my chest and gazed out the sunny window.
we were like this for quite some time and it was nice. I was patient with him and waited for him to speak.
"how'd you know i'd be here?" he mumbled, his deep voice now even deeper and scratchy.
I sighed, "lucky guess."
and another pause of silence came between us except for the lyrics coming from his headphones.
"why are you here with me?" he squeezed his eyes shut as if he was in some pain.
a look of confusion struck my face, "what do you mean?"
he faced me, his captivating blue eyes in mine, "stop wasting your time on me, you don't know me, you don't want to know me."
I shook my head, "I want to know you." I said as I reached out to place my hand on his thigh.
he grabbed hold of my wrist slightly and held it in place. he looked down at my tiny hand and tossed it off him.
I took my hand in my other hand, rubbing it slightly.
"I want to be here, I needed to see if you were okay." I spoke in a whisper.
his head fell into the palms of his hands in frustration as he collected his thoughts. after this he looked back up at me and I could almost see the hurt in his eyes.
"why did you help me? why didn't you just let me go through with opening that door?" he spoke very quiet, just like myself.
"you didn't deserve to see that." I swallowed harshly, keeping our gaze constant.
and this was true. nobody should see that. though I knew nothing of his past, I wanted him to be okay.
"olivia is too good for me." he laughed pathetically, but this laugh was sad, it was painful, and it was forced.
this was false.
me and this girl have yet to meet, but I know everything I need to know about her. she was worthless to luke. she did not benefit that boy at all. and he deserved better.
"you don't need to tell yourself that." I scanned his sad face.
his tiny nose was so lovely through his side profile. and his lips were so pouty.
"she's all I want." I remember him repeating this phrase over and over before he passed out at the party.
"I know it seems that way, but it's alright to say enough is enough. your past with her may have been well, but you can't dwell in the past." I wanted so bad to grasp onto him,
but it wasn't my place to.
he sniffled, "I still see my girl when I look at her, she still loves me." he gazed out the large window.
my hair fell in my face causing me to push it behind my ears swiftly. I blinked endlessly at him.
"that girl is gone." these words slipped out of my mouth.
his eyes gleamed at me, filled with anger, "you're wrong."
"she cheated on you!" I raised my voice slightly, fearing for his reaction.
instead of screaming back at me, he sat there emotionless. cheeks pouting as they rested on his arm.
"jade." he spoke up, speaking my name with confidence.
"yes?"
"why would she do that to me?" he gazed up at me, looking like a lost puppy, or a little boy who lost his kite, or a boy who's heart had just been broken.
I brought my lip between my teeth, not wanting to say anything to hurt him anymore.
"I don't know, luke, the world is a scary place."
"she made the world not seem so scary." he began bringing up the past some more.
I placed my hand on his shoulder, this time he allowed me to rest it there.
"you deserve someone who will treat you right." my hands gently fell down his back for reassurance.
he shook his head, "I'll make things right between us."
I shook my head in frustration, he was missing the point of this all. he was completely blind to the problem.
"is that what you really want, luke?" no matter what I said, this boy thought the opposite.
he stared into my eyes and nodded his head, "shes what I want, jade."
it pained me to hear him say this. how awfully he could just let her use him like that.
he was a sweet boy. her sweet boy. not mine.
I swallowed, "t-then fight for her." I stumbled over my own words, not wanting to say this.
"i'll talk to her."
I nodded, giving up the fight, "whatever makes you happy, luke."
i spoke softly under my breath, but in my head i knew i didn't want this boy getting hurt.
authors note;;
ok so this chapter was hella short, I know!! I just needed to get this part out and have an update for u guys. and ill probably have another update for u in about an hour or so. but anyways, I just wanted to say thank u all so much for such positive thoughts about my story!! u all are too sweet to me and im so happy u enjoy my writing. I promise u this story will get even better and the updates longer!! and the story will all tie together at some point lmao.
ok bye,
nat.