There's a loud knock on my door, but I ignore it. "Violet?" I hear Varian call out, before he opens the door anyhow; poking his head around the corner. He's dressed in some stupid outfit that makes him look like he'd hunted through a lost and found box. "Can I please talk to you?" I turn away from him, scowling. "No. I don't speak to liars." He sighs as he enters the room and sits on the bed beside me. He holds out a parcel wrapped in brown paper, before sliding it onto my lap. "I bought something for you....."
I push it off me. "So you're buying my affections now? What are you, my suitor? Just go away." He sighs. "I'm sorry. I really am. I would have told you sooner, but I thought that they were going to let you go." "Ohh, I understand. You mean you only would have told me if they kept me prisoner. Oh yes, thank you so much." My eyes dart over to him, before they widen. "Why did you draw a barcode on your face?" Varian blushes, and wipes off the fake goatee. "It's only for show, Vi." "Well it looks stupid. Don't ever grow a beard." I cross my arms tightly, using all of my willpower not to look in his direction again.
"Are you not going to open the package?" "I don't want it." He sighs once more, before holding it out to me. "It's more of a need oriented present. Unless you want to freeze." I snatch it from his hands, and rip the paper off it, revealing my white undershirt and my black flats.
For a moment, I think that he's just given me back my old clothes, but then I realise that my red tunic dress is gone, and instead there is a black strapped dress with a brown belt to go on-top of the undershirt. This piece of clothing is clearly new. I hold it up to my face and inhale the new material scent. "What did you do with my old dress?" I question softly, turning to Varian, who looks uncomfortable. "Andrew didn't like it. He told Clementine to burn it."
I sigh sadly, as I hug the outfit to my chest. "I liked that dress." "I know you did. I'm sorry. I tried to stop them." I nod my head slowly. "Thank you." "You don't hate me?" I laugh softly, shaking my head as black and cyan streaks fall into my eyes. "No. If course I don't. I was just....... I don't know, I just felt betrayed."
He sighs, and wraps his arm around my shoulders. "I won't let them get away with this." He whispers into my hair. "I won't let them erase your memories." Now it's my turn to sigh. "Maybe it's better if they do." "What? Why would you say such a thing!!"
"What if it does make everything better?" I cry, my voice sounds strained. "I've lost everything Varian. I've lost my parents, I've lost my home, I've lost my cat...." "They're going to be bringing Yang here in the morning." I sigh and bury my face into my knees. "What's the point of remembering any of this? It's not like I remember my real parents anyhow. You should be encouraging them to erase my memories. You can start over with me. Maybe I'll be less selfish after-"
Varian grabs my shoulders. "Don't you dare say things like that." He pulls me into a tight hug. "I know that you're hurting. I do. And it is because of me. But if they use the gas on you, you won't just forget about the Automatons. You'll forget everything. And I don't want to get rip every last shred of happiness away from you. It's not fair. It's not my call to make." I slowly raise my eyes to face his. "You should have let me die, you know. If you did, none of this would have happened. I'm unremarkable Varian, I'm not worth saving."
Anger seems to overcome him, as he suddenly starts shaking my shoulders. "Take it back. Take all of that back. You are not selfish. I'd rather erase the memories of the Coronians ten times over if it meant saving your life." My eyes widen in surprise. "You can't choose me over hundreds of people Varian!" "Try me." I sigh, and start twisting the cyan streak in my hands, desperately changing the subject. "I need to get it stitched up before it gets infected." I bow my head as I gesture to the scarf concealing my injury. "It may be even too late."
He unties the scarf to inspect it once more, causing me to flinch. "You're right. We need to get it stitched now." He takes my hands. "Let's go to the infirmary."
~*~
Only one doctor remained in the royal infirmary. He was a middle aged man, with a balding head and half mooned spectacles. He looks up from the clipboard he was furiously scribbling upon as Varian and I, wearing my new dress, enter the room. "Can I help you with any-" before his eyes fall upon my neck. His cheery expression contorts into one of horror as his clipboard falls to the ground with a clatter.
He darts over to us and takes my face in his hands, as he stares at the wound. "How did this happen?" He questions, his voice serious. For a moment, I want to lie, but some sixth sense compells me to answer truthfully. If I lie, the wound may not be given the right treatment. "A knife." I say softly, and his eyes widen even more at this. "It's from the Saporian raid upon the castle, isn't it?" He sighs. "You poor girl. Don't worry, I'm going to fix you right up." He takes my hand and guides me to one of the hospital beds.
"Now just sit here a moment sweetheart, let me just fill out a form." He hunts for the clipboard he'd dropped which Varian hands to him. "Thank you." He then returns to my side, dips his quill in the inkwell, before starting to fill out the form. "What is your name child?" "Violet Asaki." I respond calmly. "Birthdate?" "August thirteenth, 1805." His eyebrows raise. "Oh, happy birthday for yesterday." I wince at the memory, twisting the cyan streak. "Thank you sir." "Please. You may call my Dr Lewis. Who do I put down as your legal guardian?"
Varian steps forward. "Me." Dr Lewis nods. "Are you her brother or-" I shake my head. "No. Write down Henry and Agnes Weathers please. They're my parents." He scrawls this down, before turning back to me. "Where are they now?" I bow my head. "I don't know sir." He frowns at this, before putting the clipboard aside to dry. "Now Miss Asaki, if you don't mind, could you please lie down?" I oblige, and rest my head upon the hard pillow.
He turns to a dish cotton swabs that are floating in a bath of warm salty water. He picks one of them up, before he leans over me, the cotton bud dripping on the floor, yet he seems not to mind nor notice. "Now I may warn you, this will hurt. I will need to give you an anaesthetic injection when I put the stitches in, but until then, this will hurt a great deal." I nod, biting my lip tightly as preparation. Varian looks away, blood. The doctor holds out the cotton swab, and begins to dab it upon my neck.
When I was ten, Varian and I had been climbing up a tree, when the branch I'd been holding onto snapped. I'd fallen out of the tree and broken two of my ribs. Breaking ribs is different to breaking your arm, however; you can't just put it in a splint. You kind of just have to let it heal. It was a nightmare, I couldn't breathe without being in agony with every breath. I'd had to tightly cross my arms across my body when I talked, it was so painful.
That had been the worst pain that I'd ever experienced. But the exact second the warm salty water makes contact with my skin, I suddenly have a new first. I cry out in pain and begin twisting and struggling as I try to edge away from the liquid touching my skin. Hearing my distress, the doctor temporarily stops, as I continue to fidget and squeal in pain. I know that it's embarrassing, I probably look like a child, but I'm in too much pain to care. He wasn't exaggerating.
Without warning, a hand suddenly reaches out and takes my own hand. The action startles me, causing me jolt in shock. "Just squeeze my hand." Varian reassures me, I tilt my head slightly to face him, wary of twisting too much and causing the gash to protest. His expression is one of concern, yet he smiles reassuringly at me once our eyes lock. "You can do this." He whispers; my throat hurts too much to talk, so I just squeeze his hand in response.
Dr Lewis turns back to me, holding a fresh swab. "Are you ready to try again, or do you want some more time?" I shake my head slowly, before wincing in pain. "N....no. I want to try again. I can do this." The doctor looks like he thinks otherwise, yet obliges.
The next five minutes are a pure mass of searing burning pain. Although the doctor tries to go easy on me, it's impossible to make salty water sting less. I can feel the water dribbling into my throat, it feels so odd that even that causes discomfort. I clench Varian's hand so tightly, that I'm practically waiting for him to be unable take it anymore and pull free, yet he doesn't. Both Varian and Dr Lewis reassure me during the entire process, as the doctor begins to check the injury for infection. "You're doing great, we're almost done." The doctor would say, while Varian would repeat continuously, "I'm here, I'm here." Eventually, I feel myself slowly adjusting to the pain. The ache feels less sharp and sudden now, the pain almost seems to be dulling.
"There are no signs of internal bleeding." Dr Lewis comments, as he discards the last swab. Varian turns to him, still holding my hand; my grip beginning to relax now that the pain is gone. "That's good, right?" The doctor nods, as he begins to prepare a syringe. "Very good. I rarely see patients with this type of wound that haven't already lost a considerable amount of blood. How long ago did she receive the injury?" Varian bites his lip as he thinks. "Maybe about twenty four hours? Roughly? We've been tying a scarf around it too....to stop the bleeding." I'm relieved that Varian is doing the talking for me now, it's as if the salty water has effected my vocal cords too, as I seemed to have forgotten how to speak.
The doctor returns to my side, needle in hand. Varian pales, and clenches my hand. "What is that?" He questions, standing in front of as if protecting me. "Anaesthetic." Dr Lewis explains. "I don't want her to be awake when I pull the stitches in." Varian frowns, before turning to me. "Are you sure that you're comfortable with-" I wave him off. "I'll be fine, I'm not afraid of needles." He doesn't look convinced by this, but he really has no choice.
Varian sighs, and surrenders my hand, before stepping back. Dr Lewis kneels down beside me. "Now Miss Asaki, do you mind holding out your left arm?" I oblige, and raise my arm, holding it out towards him. He takes my wrist, and begins feeling my forearm with his index finger, he's looking for the right vein. Finally, he seems to have found it, as he rests his index and middle fingers upon a certain place on near my wrist, and pulls out the needle.
What I'd said to Varian was true, never in my life had I been afraid of needles. Like any normal child, I'd had my immunisation needles. Varian and I had actually gotten them together just before our thirteenth birthdays, another fact that I'd always been proud of, Varian didn't like needles while they never fazed me. It felt nice that despite our genders, I was the brave one.
So as the doctor plunges the sharp metal object into my forearm, I don't even flinch. Varian looks away during the process, yet retakes my hand once it's over. The effects of the substance now in my blood doesn't take long to work. I squeeze Varian's hand slightly; not because I'm in pain, but more of my way of reassuring him. That's the last thing I remember, before everything fades into nothingness.
~*~
When I awake, I'm in a bed. For a moment, it takes me several minutes to realise where I am. Corona. I'm in one of the royal bedrooms in the castle. I shoot up from the covers, realising that I'm in the same clothes from yesterday. I pinch the skirt of the black dress, it fit the exact same way that my old one did. "Hmmm. Not too bad." I mutter to myself, before a piece of parchment upon the dresser table catches my eye. Frowning, I lean over a pick it up, the ink on it is shiny, it's been written recently.
Once you're awake, come downstairs into the dining room, Andrew wants to outline the terms and conditions of the deal. I won't let them erase your memories.
-V
I reread it once more, before placing it back upon the table. Before I go downstairs, however, I walk over to the mirror at the vanity set. The ugly massive gash on my throat as vanished, and been replaced with a line of neat black stitches. I run my hand across it, I almost expect it to sting, yet it doesn't, which confuses me for several minutes, before I remember, anaesthetic. I'm so focused upon the newly acquired stitches, that I had barely noticed my hair. It looks like an explosion has occurred, it's fluffed up and matted making me look like an asylum patient.
Sighing, I pick up a hairbrush that doesn't belong to me to that sits upon the dresser. I spent several minutes trying to comb out all of the knots in my waist length hair, biting my lip with any occurrence of pain that I feel. Brushing out tangles in my hair after an anaesthetic injection possibly wasn't the best idea, I feel dizzy and groggy during the whole ordeal.
By the time I've finally succeeded in detangling it, it still looks just the tiniest bit too fluffy. But that's the least of my worries now. Instead, I just temporarily hold it down, and the retie the scarf around my neck; before finally opening the oak door, and calmly walking down the stone staircase.
The dining room is surprisingly much more busier than I'd imagined. The table is laid out with the biggest variety of breakfast oriented food and beverages. It seems to be functioning almost identically to a buffet, with various Saporians jostling around for the food. Yet the head of the table is quite barren, and sitting in one of the chairs is Andrew, and in the other is Varian. Excitement takes ahold of me, as I awkwardly push past people to get to him. The second he spots me, he rises out of his chair and practically sprints over to me. "How you feeling?" He inquires, after he approaches me, handing me a plate of toast and a mug of tea. I smile and accept the food offerings. "Groggy. Everything still feels like a dream."
He nods as we walk back to the table. "The doctor mentioned that you may kind of.....lose your grip on reality for a while. It should wear off in about an hour. The pain medication for the gash may take several days to wear off, however." I hold my hand against the wound disguised by the scarf as Varian pulls out my chair and helps me in. Andrew smirks over at me from his spot at the table. I scowl in response.
Grinning, he turns to Varian. "So. You want to negotiate the terms of the deal." Varian nods in agreement. "I'm more than happy to create the gas. I'm completely fine with that. But what I'm not fine with is using Violet as a test subject. The condition that I propose is that I make the gas in exchange for her freedom." Andrew frowns in concentration. "No to all of those proposals. All of the original conditions stand."
Varian jumps up from his seat in anger. "You're cheating! You were never going to say yes to any negotiations, were you?" Andrew smirks over at me instead of replying. This time I think better of shooting back an angry look, and divert my eyes. "Perhaps." He finally says, his voice slow and calm. "I have reasons for keeping the stiff here, you know. It's not just some way of torturing you Varian." Yet he's not having any of it. "Why? What reasons do you have for keeping her here?" Andrew continues to grin. "You'll see." Varian still looks confused, and for a moment I am too, before it suddenly hits me like a lightning bolt what he means.
I shudder, and avoid eye contact. I will never let that happen. I reassure myself, as I twist the cyan streak between my fingers. Even if my memories are erased. Smirking once more, he turns back to Varian, who scowls in return. "It looks like you have a memory erasure gas to make, huh?" Now both of us avoid eye contact.
We'd failed.