Ok guys, that's my first published story. It's not something big, just for entertainment. I'm also no expert in the Naruto universe. I really hope you can laugh a little while reading. English is not my native language so please excuse mistakes on that part. :-)
„Ouch!"
Sasuke rubs the back of his head while he is sitting beside a dumpster in a dark sideway.
What the...? Where is the guy who attacked me?
Activating his bloodline, he couldn't sense anything out of the order. He slowly peaks out of the sideway and sees people doing their business like nothing happened.
Great, I finally lost my mind.
Walking carefully through the streets he is rather confused as why some people are staring at him like he is Death in person. At least the girls are normal since they're blushing, whispering and giggling at the sight of him. He gives a short wave with his hand and smirks lightly at them. At first it seems like they're not believing he meant them. When realisation finally hits, they're grasping their hearts and one even faints.
Ok, it's a bit exaggerated but at least I still got my flair.
While his smirk grows a little wider he rakes a hand through his hair. In the distance he sees two very familiar faces. With his hand in the air he calls to them:
"Oi, Menma and Sakura!"
The two shinobis are turning their heads to him. Their brows shot up while their eyes become the size of saucers. They're staring in absolute shock at Sasuke.
"What wrong with you guys?", he asks a little disturbed.
Naruto starts to pull at Sakuras arm while whispering dreadful: "Are we... are we in a different dimension again?"
"I don't think so but I'm not sure...", she answers in a small voice.
Sasukes left eye begins to twitch: "Hey, I am right in front of you and my hearing is absolutely fine."
"Ahem Sasuke, how am I in your world?", Naruto asks slowly and carefully.
"Are you kidding me? Since when do you have a sense of humour?", the dark haired teen replies.
"I guess this is our answer.", Sakura sighs.
"What? I don't get it?", Naruto turns to his female teammate and rubs the back of his head.
Sakura glares at Naruto and smacks his head: "You're definitely an idiot, Naruto! Menma is the opposite of you and therefore NOT funny."
Sasuke was never this confused in his life. "What's going on? Why are you so mean to Menma and who is Naruto?", he shrugs.
Sakura lowers her head with a sigh and shakes it lightly. "This is going to be very difficult.", she starts while pinching the bridge of her nose. She then turns to Naruto and whispers something Sasuke couldn't quite understand. Yep, Sasukes eye is twitching again. Naruto nods his head at Sakura, says goodbye to Sasuke and runs off. The pink haired girl turns again to the raven.
"Look, we would head right now to the Hokage tower. We'll explain you everything there. This has to seem very strange to you but I promise we'll take care of the problem."
"What problem? The reason why you're acting like you're out of your mind? Yeah, I really want to know that!", he retorts angrily.
Sakura sighs for the third time whilst this conversation and just says "Follow me" and starts to go in the right direction.
Sasuke is confused again. Why should I follow her? I've been multiple times there. He decides not to question her again and just walks beside her.
At the Hokage tower
When Sasuke and Sakura arrive there, the door to Tsunades office is enough open to see Naruto explaining something to the Fifth. As he notices the newcomers he gives a small smile and disappears with a puff of smoke. The blond woman motions them to come in.
"Alright. Naruto told me about the situation and his real self is looking for the person we definitely need to explain what's going on."
"Hokage-sama", Sasuke greets respectfully. Tsunade couldn't help but be amused and positive surprised from the alternate boy.
"My... I could get used to a friendly Sasuke."
"What?"
"Nothing..."
After two knocks Narutos head pokes in the office: "Ok? Ready?" Tsunade nods and the blonde teen opens the door completely to reveal... Sasuke. Wait no... a bad copy?
"Very funny dobe. This is one of the worst imposters I've ever seen. Even you were better.", the brooding Sasuke mutters unamused.
"Yeah likewise. Why did you choose an emo kid with a bad fashion style to copy me? I'm a little offended", the Charasuke counters.
Tsunade, Naruto and Sakura are watching the encounter with great interest.
"You had your appearance now change back.", emo Sasuke deadpans. He's not amused at all.
"You'll do that but let me give you some advice for your next try ok?", Charasuke offers.
"That's enough. If no one tells me who this is I'll find out myself.", the owner of the Rinnegan retorts and activates his bloodline. The alternate Sasuke instantly stops joking and activates his. The tension in the office increases noticeably in seconds. Red and purple clashes against red.
"Okay Sasuke and Sasuke calm down. Don't fight!", Naruto jumps between them immediately. Tsunade couldn't resist a face palm at the knuckleheads behaviour. He acts like a ringmaster.
Our emo Sasuke dissipates his kekkei genkai first. "Alright. He's obviously a real Sharingan-user and not using the transformation technique. What's going on?", he asks more calmly.
"Look, here's the thing. Naruto and me have been in an alternate universe. Everything is different there. Well... not everything but a lot. Shikamaru is an idiot, Kiba likes cats while our Shikamaru likes dogs and Kiba is smart and so on. It's really confusing and it sounds unbelievable but it's true. I swear! Naruto is Menma and Menma is Naruto and my parents are heroes and so on. What I'm trying to say is, that you're both Sasuke but at the same time not. Uhm, you are but your characters are different, quite the opposite.", Sakura says in one breath without pause not even noticing her mistakes and ignoring that she spread with her explanation more confusion. Everyone is staring at her and wait what's that? Where came that tumbleweed from?
Slowly the alternate Sasuke starts to laugh. What a strange sight. His laughing gets stronger. Sasuke. Is. Laughing. Hilarious... no one is moving a muscle.
Suddenly a soft knock is heard. Out of reflex Tsunade calls the visitor in and regrets her decision instantly. Like I'm asking for more trouble...
The door opens slowly and a shy girl with moonlike eyes and dark inked hair pokes her head in. Yeah, you know who's that. She reveals herself cautiously one hand over her heart the other on the doorknob.
"A-am I i-interrupting something?", she asks softly not quite understanding the sight before her and secretly wondering if she is asleep and this just a strange dream.
Finally, Charasuke notices the new guest. His laugh transforms into a genuine smile and he approaches the girl joyfully.
"Hey Hinata-chan, it's so good to see you. Maybe you can tell me what's going on."
He puts his both hands homely on her shoulders. She stares at him as if he had grown a second head.
"Oh, modest clothing and no make-up today hm? I like that.", he exclaims while raking his eyes shamelessly over her body. He grins briefly, grabs her face and presses his lips on hers.
Wow... how to describe the situation? Hinatas eyes are wide as saucers while she turns from head to toe red as a tomato. She is absolutely frozen in her spot, not moving, not breathing.
At the same time Tsunades, Narutos and Sakuras eyebrows are hitting nearly their hairlines, mouths opened in utter shock. Sasuke on the other hand nearly hits with his eyebrows his flaring nostrils, his mouth a lopsided smile.
When our lover boy tries to deepen the kiss Hinatas body refuses further functions, her mind goes in overdrive, her eyes are rolling to the back of her head and the heiress faints like a 12-year-old child. Her partner notices this at least right away and catches her around her waist. "Hinata-chan? What's wrong? Are you sick.... or maybe pregnant? Please! Say something!", he shouts at the unconscious girl hanging in his arms like a sack of potatoes. He pulls her on top of the couch in Tsunades office. He turns desperately to the older woman: "Please Hokage-sama! Do something! Something like that never happened before!"
That brought Tsunade out of her paralysis and gives Hinata a short check-up to lessen the outraged teens tension. "She is just unconscious. It happens well... yeah sometimes. I promise you, she's not pregnant. How did you get that idea?", the fifth Hokage asks astounded just realising what he said. Thus team seven finally recovers from the shock. Naruto and Sakura are rushing to the couch while Sasuke stays a little back but still able to watch everything.
"What did you do you pervert? Are you out of your mind?", Naruto accuses Charasuke with his pointer finger close to his face.
"Am I suddenly not allowed to kiss my girlfriend anymore or what?", he counters angrily and grabs Narutos finger.
The word "girlfriend" seems to free Sakuras tongue from its paralysis. "G-girlfriend?", she stutters out. She shakes her head and turns to the alternate Sasuke: "No, no, no! She is not your girlfriend. This is not your Hinata. That is our Hinata!"
"Bullshit! Of course it's my Hinata. Look, I'll prove it to you.", he answers while sitting lightly beside Hinata on the couch.
Ziiiip!
Without hesitation Charasuke grabs the zipper of her jacket and pulls it in one move down. Next, he lays his hands on her sides at chest height. He gently presses his thumbs against Hinatas rack so the mounds are moving a little bit more together.
"Look?! This is my Hinata. I'd notice these curves everywhere anytime.", he explains like it's the most obvious thing.
Sakura presses her hands against her cheeks and lets a high pitched scream out while Narutos jaw hits the floor. Pervy-Sasuke had only a few seconds to admire his girlfriend's assets before a force – known as the last Uchiha – grabs him from behind at his collar and slams him with a loud crash in the opposite wall. Well that has to be the last string that our strict Sasuke needed to finally snap.
Charasuke stuck shortly in the wall due to the impact as small cracks are forming around him. When he finally falls down to the ground a nice print of his body can be seen on the left side of the Hokages office.
"What the hell Uchiha? Are you insane?", Tsunade barks furious.
"Tch, can't have that guy ruin my image.", Sasuke counters defiantly.
"Your image? Can't have you ruin my office! I'll garnish the necessary amount of money from your bank account for the restoring bill!", the busty woman thunders.
"Whatever."
When the alternate Sasuke regains consciousness and picks himself and the rest of his dignity up he starts to fight against the blurry vision. Sakura on the other side won her fight against a fainting spell and is finally able to tell the two Sasukes what's going on in understandable words.
...
"So I'm stranded in your dimension and this Sasuke is the opposite of me right?" Naruto and Sakura nod their heads.
"Ok, so this Sasuke is the opposite of me and your Hinata is the opposite of mine?" They nod again.
"Too bad I liked a shy Hinata. She wouldn't beat me up so often.", Charasuke sighs more to himself than the others.
"I really can't imagine the reason for that.", emo Sasuke mutters sarcastically under his breath but everyone could hear him – well except Hinata, she is unconscious.
"Oh, now I get it! Since the Hinata from my dimension and I are a couple so must you with your Hinata!", Charasuke points excitedly at his counterpart and the girl on the couch.
"What? No!", Sasuke and Sakura reply quickly at the same time, whereas Sasuke seems a little flustered.
The Charasuke – obviously confused – starts to put a few pieces in his head together... well he tried at least. When his fake realisation hits him he takes a sharp breath in and slightly hyperventilates.
"No, no, no! It can't be, but... I love girls and I've been quite the player before Hinata punched me into submission... that means ...
...
YOU ARE GAY!!!", he shouts with his whole might as through the entire city should hear his declaration."
*Chirp chirp chirp*
Emo Sasukes left eye starts to twitch uncontrollably. He definitely has to get this one checked another time.
"I AM NOT!", he deadpans at everyone in the room with the silent threat to never bring that topic up again. The two kisses between Naruto and him are still grinding on his masculinity, especially since it's his only kissing experience.
"I'll send that douchebag back to his own dimension or any dimension for all I care! Depends on your behaviour idiot!", canon Sasuke glares at his "twin".
"Strange to hear Sasuke call someone else idiot than me.", Naruto mutters under his breath.
"You know how to send him back?", Tsunade turns to "her" Sasuke.
"I have an idea. Let's get to the point where he came here. I can use the lingering chakra to send him back."
"Alright let's go.", Tsunade declares while turning to leave.
"Ahem what are we going to do with Hinata?", Sakura asks a little worried.
"Would you stay with her and tell her afterwards she had a bad dream?", Tsunade wants to know.
"I'll do it even if I don't like the idea of lying to Hinata but it's probably best after that traumatic experience.", Sakura sighs.
"TRAUMATIC EXPERIENCE? You mean the best day of her life!", Charasuke fumes.
"Move. Now. Or I'll just send you into oblivion instead of your home!", emo Sasuke hisses.
After this point has been clarified the two Sasukes, Tsunade and Naruto are heading to the place where our story started. "Now there are two Sasukes who didn't want me...", Sakura adds as an afterthought when she is left alone with Hinata.
Back in the street (you know where the dumpster is...)
When Sasuke opens the portal Charasuke looks back to bid his goodbyes and turns a last time at his darker "twin".
"One last thing emo Sasuke: If you don't start to pursue your Hinata, I'll come back to get her. I'm definitely able to handle the softer one besides the dragon.", he smirks knowingly.
"Fuck off. If you come back I'll make your Hinata a widow.", canon Sasuke glares.
Even they're very different it doesn't take Charasuke a second to understand the hidden meaning. Then he walks with a slight wave of his hand off... home.
After all, it wasn't a total waste of time to meet this idiot. I have something to do now.
That's it. I hope you liked it. Please be gentle in your comments. Constructive feedback is always appreciated.