ATTICUS RHETT VASILIEV
Kabanata 40
"Rhett, I'd like you to meet my new sister, Syden Amaryllis." Boaz was smiling widely when he introduced me to the girl shorter than him. She was small, looking innocent and scared when she stared back at me.
Crossing my arms, I stared at her more. I roamed my eyes all over her face to examine her features. She had a tan skin that made her look different from Boaz and people could clearly say that they're not related. She has a pair of almond eyes and her orbs were in the softest shade of brown. Her eyebrows weren't that trimmed because some of it were scattered a bit. Her nose is small but they stood proud. My eyes lowered more to her lips, they were pale and her lower lip is a little bit thick compared to her upper ones.
"H-hi po," I got distracted by her stuttering voice. My eyes immediately found her innocent almond eyes. Her eyes were brown, lying on the softest shade of it.
"Hi." I simply greeted before looking away. I caught a glimpse of her lips and she bit it after I greeted.
I don't like her. She's too reserved and innocent. Maybe she's hiding something or just faking it. After all, she's an orphan. They don't have parents who could teach them the how to's of life and she doesn't look like someone who knows everything.
Boaz seems happy to have a stranger for a sister. He doesn't care is she came from somewhere or who are her real parents. What was important to him is that he has a sister now whom he could protect and care for. I can't believe Boaz easily accepted her to their own family. If I was in his situation, I won't trust her easily.
She was five when I first met her but I don't see her often. Whenever we visit their house, she was nowhere in sight. Our friends always wonder why she was so shy around us. She's young, alright, and we're three years older than her. That makes sense. It wasn't easy to associate yourself with someone older than you, especially with us who's apparently a stranger to her too.
When she turned seven, Boaz formally introduced her to our friends during her birthday party. Unlike the first time I met her, she was different. She doesn't look like a person who came from an orphanage. She looked clean and cheerful now.
But I wasn't easy to be fooled. Her innocent looks may have deceived everyone but not me. I always think that there is something wrong with her innocent eyes. They're too alluring that somewhere behind it, hides mischief.
"Inaaway mo ba si Syden? Bakit palaging takot sa'yo yung bata?" It was Jax who asked. We were in Boaz' house. When we entered, the little girl just went up the stairs after giving us a short greeting.
"I don't. I don't even speak to her." My forehead was now crumpled into waves. What is that little girl's problem with me?
Jax chuckled and playfully slapped my back. "Ikaw kasi, bakit kasi iyang tingin mo nakakatakot? Loosen up a bit. You look cold and stiff."
"This is how I am. Deal with that." I told him sternly.
"If Bo finds out you're scaring the shit out of his sister, you gotta hide. Walang sinasanto iyon kapag si Syden ang nasasaktan."
Well, damn true. There was once a time when she got bullied in her school because she doesn't have any resemblance to any of the Costellos. Kids told her things about her being adopted and filthy. Bo got the news and didn't hesitate to report those kids. The bullying stopped after. They were afraid of him. They were afraid of what Bo will do if ever they laid their hands on his beloved sister.
I don't understand how Bo will try to risk everything for her. She's not related to them. Not even a single strand of hair resembled the both of them but he was so protective of her. I have a brother but I think Alexei's too young to experience bullying and I am not that protective of him. He's just four and he doesn't really talk much but he's a tech-savvy.
"Come on, Rhett!" Boaz clamped my shoulder. I looked past his shoulder to see his sister approaching us. She had a shock expression on her face when she saw me looking at her then, she dropped her head down.
I went to her to get the camera. I looked at Boaz irritatedly because I don't have time for his shits. He's been telling me that I should stop fantasizing about his sister because she's still young.
Fucking hell. I don't fantasize on his little sister. She's too young and I don't like her. He'd been accusing me because I was treating his sister differently. I was cold and distant when it comes to her.
"Baka kaya ka malamig kay Syden kasi pinipigilan mo ang nararamdaman mo? Bro, I am telling you, my sister's still young. Dadaan ka muna sa akin."
I gave Boaz a glare. "I don't like her."
"Maganda naman si Syden pero huwag lang ang kapatid ko, Rhett."
"I told you, I don't like her. I am cold because that's how I am. Don't put something else in my mouth, Boaz."
He shrugged me off like he doesn't believe me but I know myself. I don't like Syden Amaryllis for that matter. I don't like someone who's younger than me and definitely not someone who's practically a stranger to me.
I stared at the camera as I pointed it to their family. I had accidentally push the zoom button and took a picture of her. I didn't have time to delete it because Boaz continued requesting for multiple shots.
"Maganda ba ang kuha mo?" the bastard grinned playfully.
"Yeah. See for yourself."
I glanced at Syden Amaryllis who was smiling a bit. I scowled when I saw her wearing an off shoulder dress. It gave me a view of her tanned shoulder.That's why some of the boys were looking at her. I can say that she became presentable as the years go by. Alagang-alaga na siya ng mga Costello at hindi na siya mukhang napabayaan.
"Call the others, Bo." I told her brother. Boaz then went to our friends and called them while I stared at her.
"Kuya R-
"Shut it." I glared at her. I don't want to hear her voice, especially her calling me 'Kuya'. I was never related to her. Kailan pa kami naging magkapatid?
I can see that she was told to respect the people older than her but I don't think I would ever want to hear her calling me 'Kuya'. Something at the edge of her voice sends shivers to my spine. At marami ng naloko ang boses na iyon kaya hindi pwedeng masama ako.
I always hate strangers because they take advantage of people's goodness. Ang batang katulad niya, madali lang gamitin para mang-uto. I experienced it first hand when I was young, back in Russia. I was never the type of person who's very approachable but someone did ask for my help when I was alone in the park.
She was a little girl with innocent eyes. Like anyone would be totally smitten of those eyes and small voice.
She needed my help and even though I was still young, incapable of anything, I helped. But that's just what I thought.
She led me in a dark alley and I was cornered. Boys who were older than me cornered me in that dark alley and demanded for money. I looked like someone who's rich but easy to be fooled that's why they had me. I gave them money, but after that, they also put me to hell. They punched me until I couldn't see light anymore.
That's when I started hating talking to strangers, lalo na ang mga batang naabandona. They were already on the side of an unfortunate life yet they chose to also ruin others. When they find an easy target, they had no remorse. At kapag nahuli sila, magpapakita ng sisi pero uulitin naman ang ginawa kapag nakakuha ulit ng pagkakataon. Those people don't deserve a couple of chances. Isa lang ako sa mga taong hindi magpapakita ng kahit anong pake sa mga katulad nila.
But why is Syden Amaryllis different? Why is she damn timid and shy as if all along she was really innocent and not manipulative? Why is she so weak and pathetic?
"You look pathetic." I looked at her pitiful figure while setting inside a small house in the subdivision's playground.
When she heard my voice, she looked up, tears welling in her eyes. My jaw clenched and I tried so hard to look away from that pitiful face but I couldn't.
Is that tears? Are they even true?
"B-bakit ka nandito?" She wiped her tears using the hem of her shirt.
"I was just walking around here." I lied.
"Sinungaling." She pouted her lips a bit
I chuckled humorlessly and stride towards her. I ducked a bit to level her eyes and I saw them widened.
"Why do you say so, Syden Amaryllis?" I queried even when it's true that I was lying. I was there at Boaz' party. I am his friend. I am always invited kaya hindi nakakapagtakang nandoon ako.
"A-alam ko lang."
She tried to look away. I chuckled even more and sat outside that small house. She looked like a dog, really. Nagkasya siya doon na parang asong wala ng matutuluyan at naliligaw. What made her different from a dog is that she was crying while her cheeks were red and tear-stained.
"Interesting." I said and got a small rock. I threw it somewhere to distract myself from giving her a glimpse.
"You got scolded by Lola Ansela?" I asked her when I couldn't fight the curiosity anymore. I was there when it happened. I was always there whenever she tried to get the attention of their other relatives. I was there when people started sharing insults about her.
"Tss, don't try to impress everyone Syden. Not all people can be swayed by that."
And it's true. No matter how innocent she looks or how young she is, not all people are going to like her. I was one of those people. Hindi ko siya gusto dahil naranasan ko ng maapi ng mga katulad niyang inabandona. I was never going to trust people like her when my family tried to make me understand that not all of them are the same.
But for me, they all are the same. What makes the others different huh? They came from nowhere. They were nothing. They had nothing. They are no one else at all.
Even though she's been with the Costellos for years, I still couldn't find myself liking her even a bit for the world that I belong to.
"Congratulations nga pala. Salutatorian ka diba?" Her innocent voice invaded my thoughts. It pulled me out of reverie.
I simply kept my silence. I don't want to talk to her. I don't want to know her more. Kaya dapat nga ay umalis na ako at iwan na lamang siya dito.
But why couldn't I do that? Why couldn't I leave her here?
I felt her movements and the next thing I knew, she was already beside me. I abruptly stood up and got a small rock in my hand. Even that sweet scent of hers lingered in the air.
Damn it.
"Kuya R-
"Stop calling me that. Hindi tayo magkapatid." I spat coldly.
"Pero...mas matanda ka sa akin."
My jaw clenched. Why does she even want to call me Kuya? Mukha ba akong kapatid niya? Do I look like someone who'd take her as my sister? No way in hell that I'd be fooled by a small girl like her.
Iniwas ko ang tingin sa kaniya. I just want her to go home now but she had so many questions that it's making her look like a stubborn and spoiled kid.
"I really don't like you." I couldn't hide my opinion of her to myself. I want her to be aware of what I feel for her para hindi siya umasang matatanggap ko siya gaya ng pag-asa niyang matatanggap din siya ng iba.
I am different from everybody and I hope Syden Amaryllis knows that. She's nothing. She wasn't a true Costello. I wasn't even sure if Syden Amaryllis is really her name and I don't care at all. I didn't want our paths to cross again but it's always impossible to do that.
I am friends with Bo. We are friends with their family. It was inevitable for us to meet. She always looked innocent and when she does look at me, she's like someone who's afraid of what would I do if we were alone.
She was too young to capture boys' attention. Iyon ang kinagagalit palagi ni Boaz sa tuwing naririnig niya ang mga papuring para sa kapatid. We were already in high school and Syden just transferred in our school after she finished her elementary years.
She was tall for a twelve-year old girl. Her tanned skin seems alluring to every young boys in school as if it's the first time that they've seen such thing. She had a different aura and it captured everybody. Her innocent almond eyes and softest shade of brown orbs captured everybody like a witch's potion. It was an effortless way to attract people and it pisses Bo off.
"Pag nalaman ko talagang may nanliligaw kay Syden, babangasan ko na. Ang bata pa ng kapatid ko!" Bo was pissed.
Nasa grade 10 na kami habang grade 7 naman si Syden. She excels in most of her classes and that made her even more attractive. Kahit noon pa mang nasa elementary siya, she's always the content of their school paper because of her achievements. It made me smirk when she tried everything that it made her a mediocre to me. She can do almost everything but where is she really good at?
Is it arts? science? math? I don't know or maybe I just don't want to deal with that side of her life. I don't want to know her. I don't want to be fooled by that innocent beauty.
"Bo, di mo naman mapipigilan iyon. Kung lalaki ang kapatid mo, sigurado sasamahan mo sa pambababae pero Syden's a girl and it's inevitable. Magkakaroon at magkakaroon siya ng boyfriend kahit pa pigilan mo." It was Jax who said that. Katabi ko si Boaz habang siya kaharap namin.
Among the friends of Bo, we were his trusted ones. Boaz was really friendly to almost everybody but he also chooses his friends well. Kabilang ako sa mga taong pinagkakatiwalaan niya dahil halos lumaki na kaming magkasama.
"Ikaw ba? Pag magkakaroon ka ng kapatid na babae hahayaan mong may manligaw?"
Jax smirked. "Of course, I mean, I don't want to be the hindrance of her happiness. Ang gusto ko lang ay kumilatis sa mapipili niya and that's my role. To ensure that she's in good hands. Hindi naman parating makokontrol natin ang isang tao dahil gusto lang natin."
Jax and his words, really. Katulad ko, mga lalaki lang din naman ang mga kapatid niya. I never experienced having a little sister so I don't know what Bo feels.
Bumaling sa akin si Jax. "Ikaw, Rhett? Kung kapatid mo si Syden, pagbabawalan mo rin bang may manligaw? We also want to hear your opinion, man."
Bumaling din si Boaz sa akin. His brow raised as if also interested with my opinion. I kept a hard glare. Why are we talking about this anyway? And what's with the nonsensical question, huh?
"Hindi mangyayari iyon." I told. Tumaas ang dalawang kilay ni Jax at si Boaz naman ay salubong ang kilay.
"Hindi mangyayari?" Jax pried.
"Hindi mangyayaring magiging magkapatid kami."
That's what I said. Boaz punched me on the gut. Jax chuckled as if it amused him.
Totoo namang hindi mangyayari iyon. Si Syden, magiging kapatid ko? In my parents' wildest dreams. Mom always loved her presence in the house and it pisses me off. Dad told me that my Mom wanted a daughter but she got us boys instead. Tatlo na kaming magkakapatid and Mom stopped hoping for a little girl to come. She just settled on spoiling the adopted daughter of the Costellos as if she was also her own.
It made me annoyed. How could she capture everyone's attention, huh? She's practically a stranger to them. How could they like her?
And then, I know how.
She was nice and carefree even though she looked a bit serious on the other side. She tried to know things in order to get along with people. That's why it was easy for her to talk to them. The features of her face enhanced a bit when she grew but that innocent look in her eyes is still the same. Innocently manipulative.
But I see right through her. She wasn't always happy. Behind that mask of happiness is a girl trying to get the acceptance of an older woman. Through the years, I grew accustomed to how she tried to capture their Lola Ansela's attention. But the latter is as hard as a rock. No one could change her opinion of Syden.
Is she like me too? Hindi niya rin ba mapagkakatiwalaan ang kinupkop ng kaniyang kamag-anak kaya ganoon siya kagalit?
I didn't know the story about how she didn't want Syden for the Costello family. Her hatred for the little girls has always been transparent to everyone. Alam ko iyon. Alam ni Bo. Alam ng mga pamilya namin kung ano ang pagkadisgusto niya kay Syden.
But come grade 10 when Syden stopped trying. She just respected the old woman's decision of not accepting her. It made me wonder why. Did she stopped fighting for it? Or is Syden contented with what she have now?
Eh ako? Ano ang tingin niya sa akin? She always seems afraid of my presence that she couldn't look at me in the eyes.
Ah, baka sinukuan din ako. She tried to be civil with me but I see fire in her eyes. Not the fire for passion or intense admiration about me but fire of hatred. I always see right through her. Syden Amaryllis is easy to read. She's like an open book for me.
"Can you look for Syden, Jax?" I heard Boaz asked Jax. Kararating ko pa lang sa pwesto nila. It was Syden's party after her graduation.
Naglakad si Jax pero pinigilan ko. He raised a brow at me. "What?"
"I'll look for her."
Jax chuckled. "Huwag na. Baka takutin mo pa ang bata."
"Why do you always think of me like that?" my brows furrowed.
"Because you're always scaring her."
"I don't."
"Ewan ko sa'yo. Pero sige, ikaw na maghanap kasi gutom na ako."
So off I go to search for the missing princess. I found her in the arms of a boy. Her hand is on his chest and his arm was on her waist.
"After all, you're going to be my girlfriend after this Syden. Trust me." The boy said, too much confidence was oozing in his aura. My forehead crumpled as I listened.
Binalingan ko ng tingin si Syden. She didn't say anything but her reaction tells me that she didn't want the boy touching her.
I stepped forward and called her name. "Syden Amaryllis..."
She pushed the boy enough for him to let go of her. Syden's soft gasp resonated in my ears or was it a sound of relief?
"K-kuya Rhett..." she mumbled. I noticed that the boy was already staring at me. I gave him a cold look before I glanced at her.
"Bo's looking for you, Syden," She gasped and pulled her hand away from the boy. I smirked when she walked out.
"If you're planning to court Syden Amaryllis, you shouldn't do it that way." umiling-iling ako. The boy's forehead creased and glared at me. Bago pa siya makapagsalita ay tumalikod na ako at sinundan si Syden.
She was already in front of Boaz. The latter gave me a look before replying to his little sister.
I don't know what Boaz thinks of me now. He probably thinks that I like his sister more, when in the first place I don't feel anything for her.
But everything changed when I started noticing her. Really noticing her. I'm like a bee stuck staring at her glowing pollen, hesitating whether I should take some or not. Her different glow as she grew up made me notice her.
She wasn't the same as the other girls. In fact, her body wasn't that mature to be called a woman. But her beauty and brains made her look like someone who's independent and doesn't need a man to take care of her.
At that age, I already had a girlfriend. Mas bata sa akin ng isang taon lang o di kaya'y kaedad ko lang din. But her, on that age, she just focuses on her studies. There had been boys around her but she doesn't entertain them that much.
How would I know these things? It's just how those little boys talk about how she would just read their letters and then fold it after. Hindi itatapon o itatago, pero hinahayaan niyang ang janitor ang maglinis ng kalat. She doesn't accept flowers too and just let them wither.
She was cruel with boys and I'm glad she was. She shouldn't entertain them. Bata pa siya at kung magkaka-boyfriend man, sisiguraduhin ni Boaz na hindi na rin magtatagal.
"What are you doing here?" I stopped right in front of the door. I saw her standing near the couch with a bag in her hand.
My eyes narrowed as I realized it was Jax's. Bakit niya kinukuha iyon? Perhaps, she likes Jax and now she's leaving something for him? At sa kwarto ko pa niya gagawin iyon? And why is she even here, huh?
So many questions filled my mind but I chose not to ask more. It's not really my business if she likes Jax, right? After all, Jax is better than me. That motherfucker is like a walking sunshine.
"Kinuha ko lang ang bag ni Kuya Jax."
My brow raised at her stiffness. "By barging into my room without my permission?"
"I asked permission from the maid. She led me here. Pwede na ba akong makaalis?"
I just stared at her. The room was bright and so was she. Despite having that tan skin, she's glowing. Bagay sa kaniya. Even her almond eyes seems to scream confidence.
Nagsimula siyang humakbang ngunit hindi ko iyon pinalagpas. Fuck, I'm drunk. I shouldn't touch her.
Pumikit ako sandali. My hand glided at the length of her arm until my palm stopped just above hers. It was just a feather light touch but I felt the currents of electricity connecting us.
Fuck, get a grip Atticus Rhett. She's a minor!
"The next time you come here without my permission, flower, you wouldn't like what I will do to you."
What the fuck did you just said, asshole?
I scolded myself and tried to massage the bridge of my nose. Alcohols always get the worst of me, and of all the nights, why now, huh?
She's probably scared or maybe she'd been thinking that I'll hurt her if she tried to enter my room again. For now, maybe she's thinking the worst of me. I was always cruel to her-and cold and a bastard for saying things that only matters to a kid before.
Nag-iba na ang pananaw ko sa kaniya. Through the years that I've spent observing her, she didn't bring any harm to anyone of us. She didn't fool us. She was always true to herself and to other people.
And I was always in the wrong. I always think that they're all the same. That all of them, those without identity and those who grew up with strangers too, are all cruel and manipulative. Surely, Syden Amaryllis is an exemption to them.
"Rhett," Dad motioned me to sit on the chair across his office desk. I gazed at my mother who was behind him, holding my father's shoulders.
"What is it?" I asked coldly. Whenever they called me for something serious, it's always done in the office. Kung hindi lang din naman, we could talk the matter freely with my siblings around.
"Syden is turning seventeen next year." Mom supplied. Tumaas ang dalawa kong kilay. What am I gonna do with her being seventeen then?
"We've made a deal to the Costellos before, Rhett. Before Syden was adopted by the Costellos, their elders made an agreement before adopting her to their family."
"And what's in it for me, Dad? Kayo ang may deal. Bakit ako nadamay?"
"The deal is all about partnership and also, Syden's adoption. Agatha and Lyco badly wanted a child but they couldn't risk other options. That's why they opted for adoption. The condition is that the adopted child should be married when the time comes." Dad explained.
Mas lalong lumalalim ang linya sa aking noo. I get that they have a deal but why am I in this? Unless...
"Dad, what did you do?" I drawled lowly. Dad gave me stern look before leaning to the desk.
"Agatha and Lyco trust our family so much that they've also made a deal to us. They can't risk letting Syden marry a stranger so..."
"So you fucking sold me off?" I spat angrily.
"Atticus Rhett," the soft warning was from my mother. Lumingon ako sa kaniya.
I can't help but gave out a sarcastic chuckle. "God, you must be insane!"
I stood up forcefully. "You can't just marry me off like that!"
"The deal has been sealed and we can't do anything about it. We trust the Costellos and this is for your future, too- and Boaz and Syden's. Hindi lang naman ikaw ang may makukuha dito."
"Why the fuck is Boaz involved?"
"Rhett, language please." My mother interjected. I clenched my jaw because this is fucking insane.
"Wala naman talagang dapat na kasalang magaganap but Ansela Ramirez also made a deal on the agreement. She's actually the one who suggested the marriage because she's against the adoption. Talo siya sa botohan dahil pumayag ang puder ng Costello na mag-ampon sina Agatha. The other side of the agreement is that, if the marriage will push through, Boaz could get his full inheritance and even the highest position in the company. If not, even with the persistence and passion in the job, hindi niya makukuha ang inaasam-asam na posisyon."
Well fuck. Now that I am starting to like Syden Amaryllis, this is what happens. I never knew that the hatred Ansela Ramirez had was beyond angry. The latter wanted her to suffer for being in their family. But why? Why would she want her to suffer, huh? I was dying to know.
What is it with Syden that she hates? or maybe it's because she's merely a stranger to her and she doesn't want it?
Boaz had been told already about the agreement, Syden hasn't. He told me that his parents will tell his sister once she turns seventeen. Galit si Boaz. He was angry because why would his grandmother do such an agreement?
Galit din naman ako. Galit ako kasi kailangan naming maipit sa ganitong sitwasyon. If I was that little boy before, I'd probably get angry to Syden for dragging us into this. Kung hindi siya inampon, hindi ito mangyayari. But their parents wanted the adoption, hindi man si Syden o kung sino man iyan, matutuloy pa rin ang kasal. It was in order to ensure Boaz's inheritance.
"Syden, doesn't deserve this. Fucking hell." Boaz cried on my flat. He doesn't want to go home, especially when Syden's asking him what was wrong.
I could keep my mouth shut about everything but Boaz, he couldn't keep a secret for so long. Takot siyang maunahan ang kaniyang mga magulang and he busied himself to distract him.
And with what he did, he made her worry. Nang dahil doon, Trance-fucking-bastard had his way with her. Touched her inappropriately. Hindi ko makalimutan ang bagay na iyon.
I was too late. She was tainted by his filthy hands. At wala akong nagawa dahil nahuli ako ng dating. All I did was to save her from that bastard but still, too late.
"What the fuck are you doing here, flower?" I whispered angrily. I couldn't contain my disappointment to myself. I was fucking too late. He touched her!
"Pinuntahan ko si Kuya."
My jaw clenched. Putangina naman, Boaz. Kita mo na ang nangyari?
"Well, news flash Syden Amaryllis, wala ang kuya mo dito. Why would you even go to Boaz, huh?"
"Rhett, you're scaring her,"
"Wala akong pakialam. She needs to learn her lesson." I caught her wrist. Sinubukan niyang bawiin pero mas hinigpitan ko ang hawak sa kaniya.
My jaw moved aggressively. Huwag na huwag siyang magtatangkang umalis kasi marami pa akong tanong. Hindi naman ako galit sa kaniya...sadyang galit ako sa sarili ko.
I sighed. "Did he hurt you?" I lowly asked. My thumb caressed her wrist where that bastard touched her.
"I was asking if he hurt you, flower." I repeated.
"I...I-I'm fine." she stuttered. Dumilim ang aking paningin. It's fucking obvious that she's not fine!
"Ang tanong ko kung sinaktan ka niya. Hindi ko itinatanong kung okay ka lang ba."
"He held that part tightly." she said pertaining to her wrist. Nagsalubong ang aking kilay.
"What else, flower? Don't hide something from me."
I can tell that she is conflicted. Alam na alam ko. Basang-basa ko siya.
"Syden Amaryllis..." I drawled her name. It always felt so good to have her name sang by my lips.
"H-he touched me in some ways inappropriate."
When she told me that he touched her waist, I was beyond angry. But she was still afraid. Afraid that I might do the same thing to her.
"I didn't want you to touch me there. Anong magiging kaibahan mo sa kaniya kapag ginawa mo iyon?"
Natigilan ako sa sinabi niya. Fucking right. She's fucking right. What did I even do huh? Play the hero? And then touch her too to erase his traces? Pero kabaligtaran ng iniisip ko ang iniisip niya. She thought I'll sexually touched her too. She thought I was like him too.
Almost. Fucking almost.
Pero hindi ko naman palalagpasin ang ginawa ng lalaking iyon sa kaniya. Trance may come from an influential and powerful family but I have mine too. I also have the Costellos. Not because he had an advantage, he could also win.
No, that's not how this game goes.
I want to give her justice, same with the girls that had been the target of Trance's abuse. No girls should go through that phase of life where they'll regret not fighting for justice. I did not just do it for Syden. I did it for all the women who's been a victim. I may not have a sister, but I have a mother. At hindi ko kayang ganoon din ang mangyari sa aking ina.
"You did the right thing, man." Boaz clamped my shoulder and smiled. "If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't know about what Trance did to Syden. Mabubulok ang gagong iyon sa kulungan, kung ako lang din naman ang masusunod."
Well, the bastard just got kicked out of school. Hindi sapat iyon. I want him in jail. And he was put to jail, for his attempts.
It was a peaceful month after that but came her birthday and the agreement was out in the open.
Just like how I thought, she didn't take the agreement well. Ganoon din naman ang tingin ni Boaz dahil kahit alam niyang malawak ang pag-iisip ng kapatid, Syden also makes rush decisions.
It was her birthday and yet she feels like it was her funeral. She was crying at the playground, her figure sitting on the sand. She's young. She's still a child for me. She should have her freedom. Hindi iyong makukulong siya sa isang kasunduan.
I know she hates me. She hates me even more now that she knew that I am her fiance. I didn't agree to the agreement but my parents thought I did. Ayaw ko naman talaga, lalo na kung sa hindi tamang paraan iyon.
The agreement is absurd. Even though I like her, I don't want to trap her feelings. I want her to have the freedom to choose whom she'll like. Hindi iyong mapipilitan siyang magustuhan ako dahil kailangan.
I maybe cold but I was also hurting for her. She doesn't deserve this. She doesn't deserve the hate and the judgment, too. Nagbago na ang tingin ko sa kaniya. She wasn't nothing at all and she deserves every good thing in life.
I tried to be cold and I distanced myself to her. Kahit na pumayag siya, alam ko, hinding-hindi niya ako magugustuhan. I am trying to help her. I want her to hate me. I want her to stay away from me. Mas gusto ko pang magkagusto siya sa iba kaysa magkagusto ng pilit sa akin. What's the point of liking me back if it was forced, huh? The feelings will immediately fade away.
But I couldn't stay away, not when my mother is planning everything-not when she looks alluring everytime I see her.
"I like yellow and green."
I looked at her when she suddenly blurted her favorite color. I wasn't really aware we're playing the getting to know each other game, "Really?" I asked with a bit of taunting smile on my lips.
"Yeah, it symbolizes the sun and nature."
"I want to ask you some questions. Okay lang ba? I mean, I am not being nosy, I think it's better that we need to get to know each other even though I know you probably hate my presence right now."
"Who said that I hate your presence?" My brows furrowed at her words. Sandali akong natigilan at hindi ngumuya ng pinakain niyang fries.
"Uh, you? Pinamukha mo na sa akin noon kaya alam ko."
"When did that even happen, flower?"
"Pwede ba? Why are you always calling me that? Mukha ba akong bulaklak sa'yo?"
"Your name says it all, Amaryllis."
I hid my smile. I don't really know why I call her that, aside from her name being a type of flower. But maybe her beauty symbolizes that of a flower. It was alluring, bright and it beautifies everything.
She asked some more questions until,
"Why are you always cold to me when we were kids?"
"I am?" My brows met again in the middle.
"Come on! Ayaw mo ngang tinatawag kitang Kuya, when it's obvious that you're older than me."
I chuckled lowly. "We're not relatives, nor siblings. Calling me that is not a necessity, flower."
"As a sign of respect then?"
"Would you rather call your fiance 'Kuya', then?"
"That was before. Bakit nga?"
I sighed. Is there even a point of telling her that I just hate it every time she's calling me Kuya? It's not even a valid reason.
"You don't have to know. Next question before we stop outside your house."
I slowed down the car and waited for her query.
"Why do you hate me?"
We stared at each other. I felt like the time stopped when I looked into her brown eyes. They were serious and innocent for me.
"I don't."
Her forehead knotted. "What do you mean by you don't?"
"I don't hate you, flower."
I sighed heavily. That was before. when I was doubting her. Hindi na ngayon. I realized hating her is the most absurd thing I ever did in my life. I don't hate her now.
As I stared into her beauty, especially her eyes, those with the softest shade of brown, I realized that I was in a deep trouble. Her mysterious eyes captured me. Her beauty enticed me but what's the most dangerous thing about Syden is her personality. She could be like anyone. She could be funny, serious and mysterious. I realized I was falling for her so deep that I could get myself drowned.
Pero hindi niya pa dapat malaman iyon. She's too young to even know how much I like her. I can't wait for her to grow some more so I could be with her. So I could freely express how much I want her to stay in my life, hindi dahil sa kasunduan o kung anuman. I want her to stay because I harbored deep feelings for her.
"Anong nangyari diyan?" She touched the bruise on my jaw. It hurts and it was fucking aching up until now.
"It's nothing, " I looked away.
"Hindi ka talaga pumasok kagabi ano? You what? Went to a bar and got drunk?"
"Pumasok ako, I told you I had to pass some plates, hindi pwedeng ipagpalipas. I did not go to a bar, okay?" I explained. Syden's ranting voice always annoy me. Hindi dahil inosente siyang tingnan wala na ring nakakairita sa kaniya. When she speaks too much, it annoys me. Her mouth just speaks wonders that I was dying to kiss them.
But I am not going to do that. She's just seventeen, for Pete's sake!
I let go of her hand but before that, I caressed my thumb on her wrist. I noticed that she looked guilty for accusing me. Tumaas ang sulok ng labi ko nang unti-unting mamula ang kaniyang pisngi.
"I got this from Jack, our drummer. We got into a little problem and then he rumbled some inappropriate things, so I got heated. I punched him first, gumanti lang siya. The band's already in a rocky road and there's no point in saving it. I already quit."
"Why would you quit?"
"It's because I can and the other reason behind it."
My jaw clenched when I remembered that bastard. The band wasn't doing great because of him. He pissed me off when he tried describing how beautiful Syden is when he first saw her.
And then he said inappropriate words that made me punch him straight to his face.
"What's the fucking problem, Rhett? Bata lang iyon! She's really beautiful and she looks fuckable."
"Motherfucker!" I muttered. How dare this bastard say that, huh?
He chuckled touching his bruised face. "Putangina, masakit ang suntok mo. Gusto ma ba ang batang iyon? Well, it looks like she doesn't like you."
"Wala akong pakialam. Don't say things like that about her, you shameless motherfucker!"
"Galit na galit ka? Siguro di mo pa nahahalikan kaya ganyan. Putangina huwag mo kong dinadamay diyan sa selos mo."
This harebrained bastard just don't know anything at all. Wala ba siyang kamag-anak na babae? I knew he had a sister. Didn't he even think of her when he said those words about Syden? Hindi niya ba naisip na may kapatid siyang babae? What if it also happened to his sister? Putangina, ang bobo!
"Bahala kayo sa buhay niyo. I quit!" Jack muttered and gave me a hard blow on my jaw. Pinigilan na agad siya ng dalawa pa naming kasama.
I fucking glared at the bastard. Pinigilan ako ni Jal na gumanti pa. When Jack was out of sight, I also got my things, especially my guitar.
"There's no point in saving this group, Jal. I'll quit, too. Kung gusto niyo pang kumanta, humanap kayo ng ibang miyembro." I told him.
Being in the band was fun alright, but I had enough of them. I don't like the rhythm anymore. I don't like how the beat goes and I hate how I sang the song without harboring feelings to it.
I just don't feel it anymore but when Crithos, a family friend asked if I could replace someone in their band, I didn't hesitate to say yes. Maybe because I missed it. It's been months since I last played my guitar or even sang a song.
"We're actually being scouted pero baka magback to zero kami ulit kasi wala si Helion. He may not come back for a couple of years. We can't contact him either so we have no choice but to find another vocalist." Eion explained and smirked to me.
"I know you missed playing too although it's not really your priority, right?"
Shaking my head, I leaned my back on the couch, "I also want to focus on Architecture but sure, I'll give it a try."
"But if we go internationally?"
Tumaas ang kilay ko. "You're all aiming for that?"
Humalakhak siya. "There's nothing wrong in dreaming. Kaya ko namang maging engineer habang nagbabanda."
"Five years din ang engineering na kinuha mo?" I asked him.
"Nope, I chose a four-year course. Mahirap ng mag-fifth year."
"Same."
The Architecture program should actually be a five-year program but in UDM, they turned it into four. They were following other Universities abroad when it comes to the other program's duration.
When I started playing my guitar again, it felt nostalgic. The feeling of the strings at the pad of my fingers, the tremble when it bounced as I strum and the sound of my voice echoing.
"R-rhett, g-galit ka ba talaga sa akin?"
Her soft voice pulled me out of my reverie. Napatingin ako sa kaniya nagtatagis ang bagang.
"You're really asking me that, Syden Amaryllis?"
I was really damn angry when I couldn't find her. Malinaw naman na sinabi kong huwag siyang aalis doon sa pwesto niya pero umalis siya. And this is what I get in the end.
Iniyakan niya ako na parang kasalanan ko. I felt guilty, alright. But it was her fault. She made me worry. I was so fucking worried that something might have happened to her.
"B-bakit mo ako hinalikan? K-kung galit ka n-naman sa akin?"
Syden Amaryllis, you're torturing me.
"Do you think I'd be more angry if I see you crying? Hindi ko sinabing umiyak ka, pinagsasabihan lang kita kanina."
"You just shouted in front of me while your band mates are there. Pakiramdam ko ay napahiya mo ako kaya ako napaiyak."
Damn this girl. I really feel guilty about shouting but she shouldn't blame me. Paano kung nawala siya? Hindi lang galit ni Bo ang makukuha ko. I'll have to face the wrath of my mother and their family. Most of all, I'll be the most miserable. Pagsisisihan kong nawala siya at hindi ko nabantayan. I was supposed to tale care of her, now that she is my fiancee.
"I like you,Rhett." She whispered that it was almost in audible but we were so close. We've shared kisses a while ago. At ngayon pa siya mahihiyang umamin?
I tried to hide my smirk. This flower amuses the hell out of me.
"Really now, flower? Just a kiss and you like me?"
Namumula siya habang umaalma sa akin. Syden isn't the type of girl who's on the adorable side. She was more than that. She doesn't look cute nor pretty, she's like an alpha female with claws out trying to come out like a baby.
But yes, try harder on this one Amarylls. Her stuttering is also cute that it doesn't offend me at all.
"Aalis na ako. Our position is a bit scandalous for someone who doesn't even like me and yet kissed me."
Ah, not so fast. I smirked and pulled her closely. I leaned on the leather seat and watched her as she squirmed above me.
Ang dami niyang naging paliguy-paligoy. I can't help but be amused more as she tried to get angry with me. Ayos lang naman sa akin na magalit siya. It turns me.
Well, fuck. I can't also fucking believe myself. I was turned on to a seventeen year old girl and she's my fiancee. Kung ikukuwento ko ito kay Boaz, hindi siya matatawa dahil baka patayin niya ako dahil ganito ang naiisip ko habang nakakandong ang kapatid niya sa akin.
"I think am wrong for saying I have a crush on you what I mean is I am crushing into you. Like I am already hitting myself on you. I am subdued completely. So don't take advantage of my weakness and urge me to kiss you like that. I am like those assholes who can't stop themselves."
"Then, you do like me?" She gave a skeptical look.
"I told you I am crushing into you. Subjection. I am a slave to you."
Her face tells me that she doesn't understand what I just said. I felt so proud. I made the intelligent Syden Amaryllis confused.
But I let her be. Darating ang panahon na malalaman niyang hindi lang basta-bastang pagkakabangga ang nararamdaman ko sa kaniya. She's too young to even know my feelings for her. She's too young to be involved with me.
Pero hindi ko maiwasang isipin na kailangan ko siyang ligawan para doon. It was clear to me that she wanted to be courted and I don't fucking know how.
I wasn't a teen or a high schooler now. Hindi na uso ang panliligaw sa kolehiyo. But Syden's not a college girl! At gusto niyang maranasang maligawan ko. And I did and she was naughty.
Gusto niya lang na maligawan kahit isang araw lang. The fuck?
I know it shouldn't be a big deal but it made me think.
She doesn't deserve me. Kahit pa isiping ikakasal kami, I can't seem to think that she deserve a man like me.
I wasn't sweet. I can't even make her laugh with my words. I can't help but to act cold towards her and still, she understands.
I don't deserve her. She deserves someone who'll shower her with all his attention. Hindi ako iyon. I was never a fan of romance. I was never a fan of cheesy dates and such, but she appreciates my little effort about it.
Bata pa nga siya.
While she was walking in the middle with her parents, wearing that red gown, I was thinking of the things that she wanted to do in this age of being a legal woman.
She just turned eighteen and yet, the next day, she'll be married to me. Habang isinasayaw siya ng mga kaibigan at pinsan, I was also thinking that she should experience dancing more with other people rather than dancing with a stiff like me. She's just eighteen. Marami pa siyang pwedeng magawa. Marami pa siyang pwedeng masubukang bagay pero hindi niya na magagawa iyon kasi matatali siya sa akin.
She'll be tied to me forever. She won't explore the feeling of being in love and she'll force herself to love me.
That's why I also doubt if she really does like me. Yes, it could be possible but there is also a great possibility that she just likes me because she had no choice. She can't choose anyone but me. She can't love someone but me. She can't just marry any man. She can't choose who to love.
And I wasn't ready to marry her either. I wasn't ready for that responsibility.
"You can't make me do that! I can't marry Syden!" I shouted at him.
Humingal si Daddy, akmang susugod sa akin. My mother was quick enough to stop him from beating me to a pulp.
"Believe me, Dad, I want to marry her pero hindi ngayon. She's just eighteen. Kaya ko namang maghintay, j-just not now. She's not ready for it. I am not ready for it."
"Ganoon pa rin naman ang mangyayari sa inyo sa huli. You'll still marry her, mapapaaga lang."
"I love her dad, but I can't steal that freedom away from her. You see how happy she was when she turned eighteen? Gusto kong makita ulit iyon habang magkasama kami, but not in this way. Not when we're married in this kind of way. I want her to grow up and understand that this is a heavy responsibility. I love Syden but I can't just marry her just because of the deal. I want to marry her because of what we both feel."
"Mamahalin ka rin naman ni Syden kalaunan. Just like your Mom and I did,"
I closed my eyes and breathed hard. Dad doesn't understand a thing about me. He always sees the end and the future but not the present. He was always the optimistic one. Akala niya kasi lahat sa huli maganda ang kalalabasan.
I don't want Syden to regret marrying me in the end. She'll meet someone and then she'll realize she made a big mistake of marrying me just because of the deal. I stole her happiness. I stole her freedom of choosing the man to love.
But seeing her walking on the middle of the garden, I can't help but think that maybe this is our fate. We can't run away from it.
I love her. I really do, but there are things that I want her to experience before loving me back too. Maybe she's just confused and overwhelmed about everything that's why she signed the contract.
Days after our wedding, she became cold and distant. We were just inches apart but it feels like she was miles away.
Did I even choose the right thing? She wasn't happy. I can see it in her eyes.
What changed huh, baby? We were okay. We talked. We gazed at each other for so long but now...you can't even stare at me with those mesmerizing eyes.
Her cold treatment continued for months. I don't want to ask why. Siguro naisip niya rin ang pagkakamali niya nang pakasalan ako.
Maybe while she's walking towards me, she was already regretting that decision.
I didn't try talking to her or ask what was wrong because myabe I deserve the silence too. Maybe I should just let her live the life she wanted.
Hinayaan ko ng ilang buwan. I contented myself with just watching her and listening to her breathing. Kahit iyon hindi naman niya ipinagkait sa akin.
I smiled bitterly. Is this what I get for defying the agreement?
I stared at her as she sleeps. She just got here in the condo. Hindi ko naman ikinagulat na darating siya dahil tapos na ang usapan namin ng mga magulang niya.
It's time to be with her. I just missed her. I missed her voice, her touch and even her smile. Hindi ko akalaing hindi ko iyon nakita at naramdaman ng iilang buwan.
"Rhett, nagkausap ba kayo ni Syden?" Boaz boredly stared at me when he sat at the chair just across the table.
"About what?"
"Bloodletting? Pinapadonate niya ako ng dugo. May inuman kami mamaya kaya di ako pwede."
"She didn't tell me anything about that."
Boaz smirked at me, his eyes a bit playful. "Hindi ba kayo nag-uusap? Kasi kung nag-uusap kayo sigurado akong willing kang maging donor niya." He taunted.
My lips curved for a scowl. Boaz can't really keep his mouth to himself. Kailangang isapak sa akin na hindi kami maayos ng kaniyang kapatid. I never keep secrets from him especially if it concerns Syden. Sana pala ay hindi ko na sinabi.
I left Boaz there while he's silently laughing at me. When I went home to the condo, I found my wife sitting idly on the couch, lost in her thoughts.
Why can't she even tell me her needs? Kailangan pang malaman ko sa iba na kailangan niya ng tulong tapos sa huli wala akong magagawa? Even though she treats this marriage as something that's just written on the papers, the least thing that we should do is to act on our responsibility as husband and wife.
At least she didn't hesitate on inviting me as her donor. Habang naliligo siya, I was sitting on the couch and reading the guidelines about blood donation. Bawal magpuyat, no alcoholic drinks, eat a proper meal before donating and some more.
I asked Eion if he could volunteer. Pumayag naman siya kahit may pasok. I told them Syden needed their help and they did not hesitate to say yes, lalo na ang pabidang si Crithos.
I didn't think that me volunteering for her would do us good. It's like we're back to that time where we'd just talk, but mostly she was doing the talking. It was shocking to my part as well but I was happy.
My drive to become a responsible husband was back again because she started opening up to me. She even agreed to come with me to our gig.
Naninibago ako.
But it's time for us to talk. It's time for us to clear things out before we even regret everything.
Sa gabing iyon, napakaganda niya. I asked her if she could let her hair down, and she did. Maybe she got tired of my request that she just agreed. But my reason was, her neck was too attractive for me, even her collarbones. She was wearing that velvet fitted dress and it exposed her shoulders and neck. Her creamy skin was flaunted for everyone to see.
Hindi ko naman siya pinagbabawalan sa suot but I can't stop myself if ever someone would harass her. I'd kill if ever someone would even lay a finger on her.
I held her stare as I sang the song to her. It feels so good to have her attention solely for me. I was never breaking the eye contact the moment my eyes were connected to hers. Even with the playful purple led lights, I still see her ethereal beauty.
I hope she knows how alluring she looks tonight. Ever since she'd gained weight, she was too conscious about everything. Kahit hindi niya alam, palagi kong nahuhuli kung paano niya titigan ang mga braso.
They weren't that thick before but I am glad she was gaining weight. I am glad she was also taking care of her body unlike before. Kung hiyang man siya sa akin, I should be thankful for that right?
"Being with you suffocates me. I keep remembering how you became so unfair to me. How I was so foolish to even believe your words. How pathetic I am for liking a cold man like you. Kaya, oo, ayaw kong makasal sayo kasi hindi ako masaya...kasi nasasakal ako. I am too young for this, Rhett. I don't want to love a man like you. I don't want to be married to you...pero ano bang magagawa ko, ha?"
I gasped as I kept hearing her words. I never imagined myself hearing this from her. My heart constricted as I traced the pain in her voice.
I was the cause of her pain. I was the cause of her sadness. Alam ko, simula ng makasal kami pakiramdam ko ang layo-layo niya. Her eyes had lost its shine when we tied the knot and put on each other's rings.
Hindi ko alam na sa iilang buwan, kinimkim niya iyong paniniwalang ayaw ko siyang pakasalan. She heard me and my father talking, but Syden didn't hear the whole conversation.
My flower loves to jump into conclusions, mas lalong, hindi siya marunong tumapos ng isang usapan.
I understand her. If I was to put myself in her shoes, I'll also do the same. We all make mistakes. Pero ang isang pagkakamali ko lang ay hindi ko kaagad siya kinausap. I didn't ask her about our problem. Naging kuntento akong nasa tabi lang siya at naging sapat na sa akin na makita lamang siya.
If we had talk sooner, she'll never doubt and hate me even more. But it was never too late for the both of us because we gave each other the chance to vent out what we feel.
I apologized to her-for all the hurtful words I said, for all the awful memories she had with me. She didn't deserve any of it.
What Syden deserves is a love that is pure and the attention that is solely for her. What she deserves is someone who could understand everything about her even if she loses everything.
"May babaeng nabangga sa labas ng Arena!"
The words circulated as we continued the meet and greet program. The moment it reached us, it made my heart thump harder to my chest. Lalo na nang makatanggap ako ng tawag kay Boaz.
"Bo-
"Syden's rushed in the hospital."
His words were enough to make my world crumble down into pieces. My fingers trembled as I tried to held on the phone tighter.
"What is it?" it was Eion who asked.
"S-syden," even my lips trembled. Dali-dali akong tumayo. I couldn't tell them what happened as I struggled to run towards the exit. They called for me but I didn't look back.
I called Boaz again when I was already driving my car. Nasa malapit na ospital lang sila kaya mas nagmadali ako.
I was panting hard when I reached the hospital. Boaz was there at the lobby, clothes filled with blood. Syden's blood.
I weakly sat on the chair. Napahilamos ako sa aking mukha dahil hindi ko alam kung ano ang gagawin ko kapag nawala siya sa akin.
Boaz told me it was hit and run. No one caught a glimpse of the car's plate number because everything happened too fast. Wala kaming nagawa kundi ang maghintay sa magiging findings ng police at sa paggising niya.
When she woke up, I asked her if she knows someone who'll give a motive of killing her. She said none but her parents think it was Ansela Ramirez who plotted the accident. Siya lang naman ang maituturing nilang masama ang loob kay Syden.
Pero hindi na importante sa akin kung sino ang gumawa, what was important is that she is safe and alive.
"Lyco, paano kung hindi na siya magkaanak? The doctor said that the accident might damage her reproductive system. Naaawa na ako sa anak natin. First, PCOS and now, this accident. Ano pa ba ang pwedeng mangyari sa kaniya?"
Tita Agatha cried on her husband's shoulders. It was also my cue to enter Syden's private room. Nagulat sila nang makita ako, especially Tita Agatha.
I gave the sleeping Syden a glance before my gaze went back to her parents.
"R-rhett," Tita Agatha gasped, "Kanina ka pa?"
"Is it true? Syden has PCOS?" I sharply asked. The colors in her eyes faded and it was clouded with worry. Sumulyap siya kay Syden bago ako hinawakan sa balikat.
"Maybe, we should talk about this outside."
And we did. All these months, she'd been keeping things from me. She consulted a doctor about the changes in her body and she was given diagnosis but she didn't tell me anything about it.
"She wanted to keep it a secret from you because I think my daughter is afraid that you might leave her."
"Why, Tita?"
"I think Syden believes you want a complete family, with lots of children. At sobrang down niya nang malaman iyon so she was buying her time about telling you."
I sighed. My heart painfully constricted as I think about the months that she cried alone and suffered. I didn't know that she already hurting when I told her I do want kids, kahit dalawa lang ay okay na.
I should have known why she's acting strange. I should have consoled her, confronted her about the problem. Hindi naman ako magagalit eh. I won't get disappointed that she couldn't give me a child because it wasn't her fault. It's not her fault that she has PCOS. Hindi niya kasalanang hindi siya magkakaanak dahil sa kondisyong iyon.
When we talked about it, she was sorry. She was sorry that she kept it from me. She was sorry that she couldn't give me one.
Hindi naman ako umaasa eh. If we couldn't have any children at all, I'd still be grateful for having her beside me. Sapat na siya upang mabuo ang pamilya namin. I don't want her to stress herself more about it.
Her accident was left unsolved but our family believed that the accident just didn't happen because the driver was reckless. Mas naniwala kaming may gustong pumatay kay Syden.
But we have nothing else to do but to rest the case. We continued on with our lives until Syden told us about her unexpected meeting with Trance.
She told us about the threats she had been receiving and ignoring. Nagalit ako doon dahil bakit kailangan niyang maglihim tungkol sa ganoong bagay?
It was harder to catch Trance this time because there was no trace of him. He kept on running after Syden. He kept on haunting her. Hindi na siya nakakatulog nang maayos sa gabi. She was always screaming in her sleep and waking up telling me that Trance is going to kill her.
It was painful to see her that way but what's more painful is seeing her say goodbye to me.
"You'll visit me?" her lips trembled as she tried to keep her tears.
Hinalikan ko ang kaniyang noo. "Of course. I won't forget a single day to even call you. Kahit busy ako, tatawag ako."
Her parents planned on sending her to the US to be away from Trance. Hindi na basta-bastang makakaalis ang gagong iyon dahil bantay sarado na siya sa bansa.
I ignored the feeling of sorrow and loneliness when my wife left. I carried on with my life, engaged in the band and at the same time, helping with her case. Hindi ako titigil hangga't hindi pa naikukulong pabalik ang lalaking iyon.
I'll make sure that he'll pay for everything that he inflicted to Syden. My baby has been through a lot and I'll make sure that justice will be served again for her.
"R-rhett," She was crying one morning. It was almost night in the Philippines. Whenever she calls in this time, I knew she had a nightmare again. Palagi na lang iyon.
"It's okay baby. I'm here."
"R-rhett, I keep seeing him in my dreams. Natatakot ako. Baka mabaliw ako dito."
It was a painful cry and I couldn't do anything. I couldn't come to her immediately. I couldn't hug and console her. The only thing that I could do is to talk but even with my words, I don't think she will be okay. I could only listen.
Two years after she left, Trance was caught by the police. He wasn't easy to catch because he was involved in a drug syndicate. He's been protected but he was caught for being in a trap operation. Multiple cases were filed against him and we made sure that he couldn't get out of jail. We made sure that no one does it for him.
Syden didn't come back to the country after that. She chose to stay in California to study in a medical school. She wants to be a doctor and who am I to stop her? Kahit asawa niya ako, kahit matagal kaming nahiwalay sa isa't isa, pagbibigyan ko pa rin siya sa kagustuhan niya. It was always her dream to become a doctor and I want her to achieve it. Even if there's a possibility that we won't even talk much or see each other often.
Ayos lang. I will always wait for her. That's what I have been doing for years. I was waiting for her to grow. I was waiting for her to realize how important her life is to the world.
When she was just a child, I made her think she was pathetic and that she doesn't belong in the world of luxury. But now, I want her to realize that she deserves so much from this world because of the things that she's been through.
My baby was a tough woman. Syden Amaryllis never fails to make me feel proud of her. And now, as she walks to me, with her eyes solely staring back at mine, my heart is now reaching the point of its outburst. She's so beautiful in that graduation dress and diploma. It suits her. My doctor.
"I'm so proud of you," I whispered as she clung to me more. Parang ayaw niya akong bitawan.
I chuckled in her ears. It was a good feeling to have her in my arms again. They felt empty for years and now that she was back in it again, I felt everything. Her scent, her heat and her love for me. She is everything. And without her, I have nothing-I feel nothing.