° I could be anything in the world
But I wanted to be his °
Chapter 30
Elation... I have never quite understood the depth of that one word.
I don't play sport of any kind and I don't compete in stuffs. I hear people winning everyday and describing the feeling of it but it's has never been something I fully understood. The closest I came to understanding it was getting my report cards and seeing an A* on it, that was the closest feeling to winning I've felt. Also when I once won a bet against Jamal. But that's all.
Now I understand it, the way my heart beat, the way I can't stop smiling and how free I feel... It's like I'm intoxicated with happiness. I'm elated. This has to be the cloud nine books thought about. I have won something, I have won against myself.
"I'd see you tomorrow," Sky asks, parking his car at the side of the road, two houses away from mine. It is dark now and the rain has finally subsided after a heavy downpour, but the street is light up with street lamps and lights from houses.
I nod, I might or might not have lost my ability to speak. Maybe I'd cry if I try or something close to it.
"God," Sky groans tossing his head back and closing his eyes, "do you have to go?"
I chuckle, swallowing and finding my voice. "I-I don't want to," my voice is all husky and unlike mine, I try to clear it out. "But my mum won't tolerate another night out."
Sky flutters his eyes open, his grey cat eyes landing on me. He blinks like the words he's trying to say are too heavy to get out. Giving up on speaking, he leans forward, his lips meeting mine in a kiss that I cannot get enough of. Like second nature, my eyes close and I let him kiss me, relishing in every second because I might just open my eyes and it'll be a dream. Sky pauses and speaks against my lip, tickling me nicely. "I'll miss you so much."
My hand move and my fingers sink into his silkly hair, "me too." I kiss him some seconds more before stumbling out of the car, I haven't taken a drop of alcohol but I feel the drunkest I have ever. "Goodnight, Sky."
He smiles, wiggling his fingers at me in a goodbye. I return his smile before going over to the back of the truck and retrieving my bicycle. I don't mount it and as I drag it with me, I can feel his eyes on me the whole time. Before I turn and enter our little fence, I look back at his car, not sure that he can see me and taking note of his silhouette before I enter, dumping the bicycle and rushing into the house.
I refuse dinner that night and I end up locking myself up in my room, reliving the entire day and smiling until my cheeks hurt. I touch my still tingling lips and then I cry and I laugh and I smile.
Moses beard, I kissed Sky!
My phone rings and I lung for it searching for it in my bag, when I finally get hold of it, I have a missed call from Sky. The next seconds, a text from him pops in.
Is it real or was it a dream?
I smile, something I apparently cannot stop doing, bouncing on my bed and crossing my legs as I reply; I don't know, was it?
If it was, I don't want to fucking wake up— is his immediate reply.
It's not, I sincerely text back. It is the most real I've felt in a long while.
You're not going to regret it? Sky's text ask and I can just imagine him biting his lip with uncertainty.
Funny, that's a question I have not gotten around to asking myself. Which says a lot, so I text back; No. I feel it's true, I won't regret it. I'd probably overthink it and beat myself about for it but I won't regret it. It's something I never even knew I wanted so bad.
I miss you. Sky texts back and I feel it's a replacement for something else we can't just say quite yet. It'll have to do for now because it's really true.
Me too. I wish I spent the night at his place, I would have not slept.
Get a goodnight sleep, love. I'd see you tomorrow, sweetheart.
I giggle to myself, texting him back and tossing my phone to my desk and screaming into my pillow in pure happiness; you too, honey.
I don't sleep a wink and that's totally fine.
*
"Mate, I don't know what y'all talking 'bout but that shit ain't right and you gonna be aight," Jamal says nailing at an imitation of somebody I still am not sure of. "We was fine before it all, we gonna be fine after it was all gone."
I laugh, "Mal, stop talking rubbish like that." He laughs too, shaving his head and chewing on a chip. "Who did you say was talking like that again?"
"My dad, man."
"Whoa, your dad?" I am not expecting that.
"Yeah, he was drunk and I caught him talking on the phone like that and then I approached him and I asked if he talked like that when mum was still with us and he shrugged and I said it's no wonder she left us."
"Oh my," I shake my head at him. "That was harsh."
"Well, he deserves it and more," Mal slaps his hand on the table. "I'm still not over the fact we both almost got arrested because he forgot to pick me up and couldn't hear his phone ringing in the bar. That's just shit."
I swallow, I have been trying not to think about that and with recent events, it was working. "That was not his fault, it was all mine."
Jamal tsks, "he started it and I was right. It's those friends and the drinking that made my mum leave him. Herb, my step father is a lawyer, all respectful and stuff. You will never hear him speak the way my dad does and we all black."
"Well, Herbert, your step father is different. He grew up in a different neighborhood, went to the university... and stuff. Your dad's different," I sigh. "I don't even know why you didn't go with your mum. Your step siblings are surely having a blast life."
Jamal sighs, letting his face fall on the table. "Nah, I couldn't leave my old man. He would've never survived another day if I had left."
"Hmm," is all I can say, staring at my sandwich.
"And he's better, okay," he lifts his head up, a defensive glint in his eyes. "He was worst before and now he's better. He has a stable job to take care of me and help out aunt and he doesn't drink so much anymore, he cut down really well. That day was just a bad day, I guess."
"And he regrets it," I chip in. It's one of those rare days when we are the only ones at our table.
"Yeah, he does," Mal smiles and I do too. "I'd forgive him, I just want him to know it's not right, you know. I should always come first, like you and Ness do with your parents."
"I'm not sure we always come first with our parents," I say trying to lighten the mood a bit and adding a wonky smile to it. "God does and after maybe a couple priest and after some charity events and after- maybe the lawn," that gets a laugh out of Mal. "I think we come like tenth or something, especially to dad."
"Especially to dad," Jamal repeats laughing, then he points a fry at me. "And what's up with you today? You've got this glow on you and you're more chatty and smiley than usual."
"What do you mean more smiley than usual?" I ask, although I get what he means. I didn't sleep but I'm the happiest and freest version of me than I've been in a while. "Are you trying to say something, Cole?"
"Yes and you know I am," he leans forward and squints his eyes at me. "What did Sky do? Or did you take spiked coffees? Are you a bit high?"
Sky, I can't keep the smile out of my face and I end of poking my tongue into my cheek and looking away from Mal. I can't tell him, it's my little secret now and it still a fetus. "It's nothing."
"Ah, now I know it's something," he wags his finger at my face.
My eyes caught Darcy sitting with a group of girls and one guy, they are all laughing and it gives me an idea of how to stop Mal's questioning and escape from here before my face spills it all. "I'll be right back."
"Issy, you can run but you can't hide."
"Shut up, Mal," I hiss walking over to the vending machine. Something I barely do, I think this machine has eaten my penny all but twice since I entered secondary high school. Beverages just weren't my thing. I get a fizzy soda I've seen Darcy sip on regularly, rolling it on my palm as I walk to her table.
My voice almost disappears when I stop there and they all go silent. Different colours and pairs of eyes on me. I hope this is a good idea. Swallowing my nerves, I speak trying to look at Darcy's blue eyes and none other. "Hey Darce."
She narrows her eyes at me, "Israel."
I clear my throat louder than I would have preferred and while fighting a blush, I continue speaking, extending the canned drink to her. "I brought you this," she takes her time collecting it. "And an apology."
"Aw," a girl whose name I don't know awes making Darcy and I blush. Although mine cannot be easily spotted but Darcy looked really close to a tomato sauce.
"For what?" Darcy asks trying to be stubborn but I could see right through it and I smile in achievement.
"Anything you're mad at me for," I say and now I think two girls aw.
"Okay, apology accepted," Darcy smiles, "now scram."
I laugh, "come to the table please?"
She looks between her table and I can't miss the nods going around. "Sure, be right there."
I nod, turning on my heel and walking back to the table triumphantly. Jamal is a fit of laughter when I return. "What?"
"The prince charming himself," he praises and I can't help but laugh. "As if you're going to get Darcy Pickett to fall for you."
I bite into my sandwich, "stop talking stupid."
"I'm going to be here, crossed leg and all watching because I love drama."
"I just apologized Mal," I shake my head. "She knows I don't like her like that."
"Darcy doesn't know shit," Jamal whispers and I see her coming over. "Only myself, Sky and you know that. And maybe Lou because there's no way he can't have noticed the staring and saint."
"Shut up Mal," I actually mean this one.
"Hi gentleman," Darcy says dropping her bag down before her eyes meet Mal. "And goat."
"See see," Jamal says as I chuckle, "there's no way calling me that is right in the church, Darcy Magdalene."
"Well forgive me then," she spits, sitting down with her tray. "Don't speak to me Jamal, I'm in a good mood."
"Why, because Issy bought you soda?" He says and I look up sharply at that, glaring at him.
Darcy blushes, looks at me and then raises her chin up at Mal. "Yeah, that's right. Got something to say about it?"
Jamal shrugs, "nope, nothing." His eyes flicks to me, then back at Darcy. "Except I could make you happier."
"Oh yeah?" Darcy scoffs, "as if."
"I could give you my chips. Hell, I could buy you a bucket of chips, I could buy you so many pennies worth stuff in the machine," Jamal goes on and I'm confused about what's going on. Is this a fight?
"Oh yeah?" Darcy actually smiles and my eyes widen. "Just pennies worth?"
"Pound worth... Dollar, yen worth," Jamal continues and Darcy laughs.
I shake my head, completely weirded out by the what's happening in front of me. I bring out my phone, smiling to myself. As if Jamal Cole is going to fall and make Darcy Pickett fall for him.
I slide open my phone sending a text to the one and only;
Hi.
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*Wiggles brow*, whatcha think? Is there a possibility of a Mal and Darce? Or is Darcy actually going to fall for Issy? That should get things complicated.
Vote and comment.