Edward Cullen hated himself.
He hated that he'd left, he hated that the girl he was so madly in love with hated him, he hated himself and he hated that his family would not shut up about the way they could save her.
However he didn't hate that as much as he hated the thought of having to tell Charlotte that he'd actually kissed someone else.
"Will you all be quiet?" Edward tried not to speak too loud, his eyes focused on the girl who's head rested in his lap while she slept on the sofa.
"We're trying to help, Edward." Emmett was angry, he couldn't understand how it could possibly be happening.
"You'll help by letting her sleep."
It was now very clear to the Cullens that Charlotte wasn't well. The fountain had rubbed off her face, showing just how much more pale the already pale girl was. Her concealer had vanished, showing the darkest bags under her eyes. It was only now after weeks of them being back that they could see how skinny she was.
"How many chips did she eat?" Esme didn't know what to do with herself, she felt like she should do something but she didn't know what. It was all tearing her apart inside.
"Fifteen, she had exactly three bites of her pizza." Rosalie hadn't left Charlotte's side, she felt so protective over her. It was Rose that Charlotte had chosen to tell first, it was her that Charlotte had rang when she was so upset. So now Rose had to make sure that Charlotte felt safe.
"How much did she....keep down?"
"....None of it." Only Rosalie and Jasper were allowed in the bathroom while Charlotte threw up. Rose was there to rub her back and Jasper was there to try and make her feel better through his gift - although he had to face the wall, Charlotte didn't want him to see her like that.
"She needs help." Emmett couldn't bare the thought of losing his best friend, he was so close to getting her back.
"She doesn't want it." His mate spoke from her place on the sofa where she was softly stroking Charlotte's head.
"She knows she needs it."
Edward had noticed that the barrier Charlotte normally put up to stop Edward from reading her thoughts had gotten weaker, she couldn't hold it up as long as before.
"Why doesn't she want it?"
Charlotte had forced the family to play music as loud as they could while she threw up the entire contents of her stomach. It meant that they couldn't all hear the disgusting noises but they also couldn't hear the things she was telling Rosalie and Jasper.
"She didn't want us to tell you."
"Don't be a dick, Rosalie." Edward needed to know why Charlotte didn't want to get treatment.
"She didn't want us to tell you." Rosalie kept her movements calm, but her voice was so cold.
"Please, Rose." It was Esme begging now, she didn't want to invade Charlotte's privacy, but she didn't really have a choice.
"She's been doing research." Rosalie sighed.
"She thinks if she doesn't have treatment she'll be able to give her mother a grandchild." Jasper finished explaining.
Edward didn't know if he was annoyed or upset at what his siblings had just told him. He thought it was so stupid of Charlotte to put off treatment in hopes of a baby - even if it was for April.
He understood what she meant. She had accepted death, and thought this way she could leave a piece of herself for April. Not only that, but it would be something that would take April's mind off the loss of her daughter.
"It's never going to happen." Carlisle spoke from his place next to his wife.
"You don't know that." Rosalie would defend any decision that Charlotte made, especially when it came to a baby.
"Rose, be realistic."
"Stop it Alice, all of you stop it. Let her make her own choices."
"Rosalie, we don't know how aggressive the cancer is, we don't know how long she has left, if it's spread, if it's curable. We don't know anything, she doesn't even know anything." Rosalie hated the way Carlisle was speaking.
"Just let her have hope, let her believe she has a chance."
Esme tried to be a voice of reason, "We can't do that Rose."
"You can. How are you going to tell a girl who a year ago thought it was impossible that vampires existed and is now in love with one. A girl who thought werewolves were made up a few months ago and now had one in love with her. How are you going to tell her that she can't have hope? That she can't pray for the impossible when her life is surrounded by impossible things."
"Be realistic, Rose."
"Oh my god, no! Her life is surrounded by the unrealistic....You can't say I don't have a point."
"Alice." Esme didn't want her family to argue at a time like now, especially not in front of Charlotte, "Can you see anything?"
Alice now felt the pressure from every pair of eyes turning to her. She'd been trying to see Charlotte's future for a while, but every time she tried it would just come up blank. She didn't want to say anything until someone asked.
"She either doesn't want me to see it or...."
Rosalie waited for Alice to finish her sentence, but she never did.
"Or what Alice? It's not there?"
"Rosie?" Everyone's golden eyes shot to Charlotte, they hadn't expected to be awake for another few hours, "Rosie, what's wrong?"
Her voice was so quiet, so hoarse. It sounded like she hadn't had a drink in years.
Edward tried to help as Charlotte lifted her head out of his knee. He could hear her thoughts, hear how she was complaining that her head was too big to carry but she just didn't want to complain to anyone.
"Nothings wrong, Charlie, I'm sorry for waking you."
"You didn't wake me, I've been awake for a few minutes."
All of the Cullens froze at Charlotte's words, she'd been awake for minutes, listening in to their conversation and they didn't even know.
"You have?" The worry was clear in Esme's voice, she must have heard what Alice said.
Charlotte placed a smile on her face, it was so fake but they all knew why she was doing it- for some reason she wanted to comfort them.
"Yeah it's okay.... I already knew everything you were saying anyway." She sounded so carefree, so happy.
Edward couldn't bare it, she couldn't be dying. Nothing could be wrong with his Lottie.
"Do you need anything sweetheart? A drink, some food-"
"-Can I have some toast please?" Esme rushed into the kitchen as fast as she could, anything to busy herself.
"You feeling okay ,Charl?" Emmett couldn't move from where he stood, he just didn't know what to do.
Charlotte hummed in reply before slowly pushing herself off the sofa. Edward and Rosalie tried to help her but she just swatted their hands away.
"I'm okay I promise. You guys are making me feel like an old lady... I'm just a bit slow in the mornings... I'm gonna go to the toilet."
Rosalie immediately stood up, ready to walk Charlotte there. Until Charlotte pushed her weakly back down onto the sofa.
"Thank you, Rose, but I can go by myself I'm not incompetent. Nothing bad is gonna happen to me."
They watched as Charlotte walked out of the room, her movements were so much slower than before, her steps not as graceful. How had they not noticed?
Emmett started laughing, although it wasn't a happy laugh, "She cares more about us and about how we are than she does about herself."
"What do you expect from her? She's always been that way." Jasper spoke for Alice who was unusually quiet.
After a few minutes of nothing went by Emmett decided to speak again, "It's not fair, it's not fucking fair. That girl is the sweetest person I've ever met, she loves with her whole heart, she'd probably give her dying breath while sticking up for one of her friends, she's fucking making sure everyone else is gonna be okay instead of worrying about herself.... She's been so kind to the world and all she asked for was one thing in return, a happy long life.... But the universe just laughed in her face."
The other Cullens had noticed Charlotte arrive back in the room half way through Emmetts little speech, he hadn't noticed though. He still didn't notice her now she was back in the room.
"Oh Emmy" Charlotte rushed forward as fast as she could and threw herself into Emmetts arms, holding him as tight as she could, "I'm okay Emmy, I'm not in any pain and I'm really really happy." Charlotte squeezed him tighter, "You're just really emotional right now... you all are."
"You're not in any pain now Charl, but what about later?" The two still had their arms tightly wrapped around each other.
"When have I ever done something without a fight? Besides.... if you keep me drugged up I'm sure I'll be fine."
Carlisle had a small smile on his lips at Charlotte's interaction with Emmett. Was she the sweetest person he'd ever met? No, she had her moments, but for his family she was perfect.
"Charlotte," Esme walked back into the room, placing Charlottes toast on the coffee table, "Your toast."
The girl wasn't walking as slow now, it seemed she had more energy. So she rushed over as fast as she could and engulfed Esme in a hug, pressing a kiss against her cheek, "Thank you Mimi."
Esme was very cautious in her short hug with Charlotte, she didn't want to hug her too tight in case she hurt her but she also didn't want her to think she didn't want a hug.
Charlotte felt awkward eating her toast, all of the Cullens started at her like she could drop dead any second.
"I'm fine you guys. I'm not really sick on a morning."
"Is that why April doesn't know your ill yet? Because the only time you've ever sick is when she's not around." Charlotte narrowed her eyes at the man next to her.
"No Edward, she doesn't know because it would break her heart. Thanks for your concern though."
Edward couldn't help but roll his eyes, Charlotte was back to stressing him out to the max.
"What are your plans for today, Charl?"
"Well," Charlotte grabbed Rosalie's hand "If it's okay with Rose and Edward, I was hoping they'd come with me to tell my mum." Charlotte gulped, "I know I said it would break her heart, but imagine if I just dropped dead now and I never got the chance to tell her the truth."
"Really? So you are gonna tell her?" Alice didn't know if she was happy at the news or not, it was the right thing to do but also the painful thing.
"If Rosie and Ed come."
"Of course we'll come," Rose squeezed Charlottes hand ",But we can't tell her for you."
"No I know, I don't want you guys to. I just need the support."
Emmett was slightly upset that Charlotte didn't invite him to come with them, but he also understood. Edward was her soulmate and Rosalie was the first person Charlotte had told- she was like her blanket of comfort.
"Are you sure you're ready to Lottie? I know I just made a comment about it, but I didn't mean it. If you don't feel-"
"No no. I'm gonna do it today."
this has been me the last few chapters seeing how it's got u all feeling some type of way🥺 means the world u guys actually take the time to read and comment💓
also not that i wanna make everyone cry all the time but i kinda just like writing sad stuff cos i think i'm better at it than happy stuff, so maybe bring your tissues for next chapter.