(That's the dress and hairstyle she is wearing.)
"I LOOK LIKE A HOOKER," I scoffed as Flynn added the obnoxiously large diamond dangled earrings that matched my dress. I stared at the vanity mirror, staring at the dress. The fabric was thin and clear... As see through as glass, and Flynn painted glitter on it to look like tiger stripes, which covered what needed to be. The clear fabric gave off the image that I wasn't wearing any clothes and that the tiger stripes were painted onto my own skin. My eyeshadow was a dark smokey black color, but he put a line of sparkly blue eyeliner on my undereyes. Flynn clearly had fun trying to make me as exposed as possible in all those outfits. I didn't blame him, though... He'd only worked on minors for the games, he deserved some mature work.
"You look fantastic," Flynn clapped. The dress went to the end of my knees, and my left arm was coated in the dress. But one thing that was hard to ignore... My cleavage. Flynn did the absolute most to make sure my breasts were practically staring at the crowd.
"Oh my goodness!" Bee's deep voice filled my ears as she walked up to me, clapping softly, "You look so beautiful— Amazing job, Flynn!"
I sighed and stared at myself in the mirror, running my hand down my body softly. I touched every curve on my body and admired the stripes on the dress, "It's perfect."
"You go out there and be you, Ameria. Not Alexie's sister, not the youngest victor, not anyone but you," she assured. The sound of Alexie's name made me flinch... I avoided hearing his name. But Bee's next words made up for it, "You don't have to be who they want you to be."
I smiled to Bee, accepting the small kiss on my cheek she gave to me. Flynn's stares interrupted the moment, "Maybe it needs to show... More."
"Flynn," I scoffed, and looked over at him, "My breasts are practically out."
"Fine by me," a familiar voice joked, making me turn my head to the door. Finnick was leaning on the door of my room and smirking. He removed himself from the door as he walked closer to me, "You know— I was joking the first time, but now I think they really are trying to get you as naked as possible."
I made eye contact with him, "They have a thing for black eye shadow too— But the blue eyeliner is new, I'll give you that."
"What do you want, Finnick?"
"To stare at you," he flirted, his usual smirk plastered onto his face, "With such perfection how am I supposed to stay away?"
I gulped and turned back around and stared at Flynn. He smiled widely as I leaned over to give him a soft kiss on the cheek, "Thank you, Flynn, you did lovely."
"My pleasure," he grabbed a box that he had makeup in and walked out the door.
My hair was slicked back, as if I had gotten in the pool and my hair stayed back, "Your hair looks fantastic, Gold."
"Stop calling me that," I glared, "And it took 5 layers of gel to keep it like this, so thanks."
"I wanted to remind you," Finnick's face fell serious, "Cesar might bring up... You know."
"Yeah."
"Just wanted to keep you prepared," he quickly changed the subject, "Johanna told me about that stabbed mannequin head with President Snow's name you brought out of the assessment."
I ignored him and walked past him towards the door, "Don't ignore me."
"Don't you have a girlfriend back home, Finnick?" I asked him, opening the door and barging out as he followed.
"Annie?" he scoffed and shook his head, "We were in love until she won her games... She changed."
"But you're still together?"
"No," he shook his head, "I broke up with her after a year of her victory. She changed to much— She wasn't Annie anymore. She didn't love me."
I stayed silent at his vulnerability, but he quickly smirked again, "Why do you ask?"
I stopped walking and turned to him, "Because if my boyfriend was following some other girl around, I'd be upset."
"You have a boyfriend?"
"No," I denied, and kept walking, "You're up soon, Finnick. You should go."
I saw Riffian running towards me. He was wearing silver pant suits, and a glitter see through long sleeved shirt tucked into it. He had gold lips and blue on his undereyes, "You missed Cashmere and Gloss' pathetic acting."
"Fuck, I love their freak shows," I whined, stomping my foot, "You should have called me."
Beetee was now on, speaking about some smart bullshit no one was smart enough to understand, "Well, well, well."
Johanna was smirking and taking long strides towards me. Her gold thick dress made me sweat just looking at it, "Ameria, you have me intrigued."
I furrowed my eyebrows, "You may be a suspicious, weird, quiet, traitor, untrustful son of a bitch, but that President Snow head thing—Admirable. I'm impressed."
I rolled my eyes and ignored her and watched Beetee on the screen. Finnick glared at her, "Johanna."
"What?! I'm being nice!" Johanna exclaimed, her voice louder than it should be.
Cesar called Finnick and Mags' name as they both gathered together. Finnick gulped... I had never seen him nervous, "You'll do fine."
I was nice to Finnick for once and it felt weird.
He inhaled and leaned in to give me a gentle kiss on the cheek. He smiled at turned around to walk onto the stage. I widened my eyes as he walked away. I couldn't tell if I liked it or never wanted it to happen again.
"Ameria," Katniss approached me from my left. She was wearing her huge white dress, which I assumed was her wedding dress, as she walked towards me, "I like your dress."
I heard from everyone she was bitter and rude... I wanted her to be like that with me and leave me the hell alone. She had so many other people to be allies with, yet she wanted me after she'd been warned to keep her distance. She did have a reputation of rebellion after all.
It wasn't that I didn't like Katniss. I liked her, except for the whole breaking the rules and getting us all killed thing. She was brave, and she was unique... She gave everyone hope, and whether it was false hope or not, it still brought people together. I just couldn't risk having allies.
"Thanks, your wedding dress is beautiful," I emotionlessly said, but gave a little nod to be nicer. Johanna scoffed at the sight of Katniss and walked away. Haymitch stood next to Katniss, tensed up, "Haymitch, how are you?"
"I'm peachy," he sarcastically said while gulping.
"You can breathe, man," Riff joked, as he put his hand on Haymitch's shoulder. Peeta continued his glare on me as I spoke.
"Baker boy," I said while holding the eye contact, "We haven't met yet."
"Good," he said, walking away. Katniss sighed and looked at me. Peeta looked at Haymitch and Katniss, who looked at me and left, but Katniss gave me a small sympathetic smile before leaving as well.
Riffian glared at me and rolled his eyes.
ꨄ
"Everyone, give it up for District 6!" Cesar yelled, the crowd cheering, "Riffian and Ameria, come on out!"
Riffian stuck his arm out as I hooked mine into his. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. We walked towards the entrance, but before I could get on, I felt weak. I could feel my legs becoming jell-o as I fell on my knees, "Riff, I can't."
Cesar's face had done enough to bring trauma. I gulped and stared at my shaky hands that I quickly brought to my mouth and bit my fingernails. Riff tried to carry me up, but I kept myself weighed to the ground. I felt my eyes watering, "Riffian, I can't— I—"
I couldn't breathe.
My vision was getting blurry.
I never knew what PTSD or an anxiety attack felt like since I never got out of the house, but as I stood next to the entrance of the interviewing stage and saw Cesar's face, the capitol, and all the victors, I finally understood. Cesar looked over at me, as I nearly passed out, "Give us a moment, folks."
I gulped and kept my stare onto the ground, feeling shaky. Riffian was talking but I couldn't hear it. I heard Bee's voice behind me, and her thin hands patting my back. It all sounded like I was underwater and they were speaking, but I couldn't hear. I felt like I was drowning. I swatted away both their hands and tried to take gasps of air, but I felt like I wasn't getting enough oxygen.
I wanted to scream, to yell that I couldn't move, but I couldn't. It was like I was in a room filled with people, and no matter how hard I yelled, no one heard.
Then all of a sudden I saw someone crouched on their knees in front of me. I recognized a familiar white button down at my eye level.
Finnick.
He was talking, but I couldn't hear what he was saying either. I could hear Flynn, too, and then Cesar.
I hated the attention. I hated the way everyone crowded around me. If I could have breathed normally in that moment I would have yelled at them to all leave me alone. But the feelings of two hands on both sides of my face made me focus on my breathing more, "Ameria, look at me."
I was taking gasps of air as I moved my head up to make eye contact with Finnick. He was holding my face with his hands as he ran circles over my cheeks with his thumb, "You're okay."
"I can't," I cried a little, and I internally thanked Flynn for using waterproof makeup, "I can't—"
"Yes you can," Finnick smiled, "You can do anything. And you're gonna get back up, and show the capitol who Ameria Gold is, alright?"
I held onto his arm that was on my face and gave it a squeeze. I felt my air evening out slowly but surely. My other hand gripped onto Finnick's other hand. I closed my eyes, focusing on Finnick and I kneeling in front of each other, and his hands on my face, and my hands on his wrists.
I hadn't felt affection like this ever until Mags and Finnick, and I enjoyed the feeling.
I moved my hands up from his arms to his hands and rested my hands onto his. I took a deep breath and got myself up one foot at a time. I removed Finnick's hands from my face and stood up straight slowly, "I don't know you, but stop crying about it and catch your breath."
Johanna's attitude made everyone's head snap. She put her hand on her hip, "You wrote President Snow's name on a mannequin's head and stabbed it in front of the gamemakers. You killed like— 8 people by yourself when you were 13, and you can't handle an interview?"
I could see Johanna staring at me, but her words gave me an odd sense of confidence. I gulped and nodded. Finnick glared at Johanna as he put his hand on my back supportively. Cesar smiled with his shiny teeth, "Ready?"
I nodded and cleared my throat as I hooked my arm into Riffian's. Finnick and Cesar ran out to where they were before on stage, and Cesar began talking into the microphone, "I apologize for the delay— Now, the tributes of District 6!"
I gulped and slapped on a face of bravery as Riff and I walked confidently out onto the stage. Cesar looked taken aback, "What happened back there, Ameria?"
"Just memories," I nodded, sounding emotionless. Riffian was closer to the crowd and I to Cesar. I looked over a little behind me to see Finnick supportively nodding, "It's just been a while, that's all."
"Indeed it has, Ameria," he nodded and smiled, "Not since... Well, you told us your side of the story already, right?"
"No, I told you the truth... There is no other side of the story," I rudely remarked.
"Sassy! I like it! Don't we love it folks?!" he laughed. The entire crowd yelled and cheered. Cesar let the cheers die down and he looked at Riffian, "You were her mentor, Riffian... How does it feel to go back out there and fight with your trainee?"
"It feels... scary. I mean, I care for her, it's hard to imagine one of us gone," Riff frowned and grabbed my hand, "I'm ready to sacrifice anything for her."
The crowd awed.
"Why did you volunteer, Riffian?"
"Because when you care someone enough," he sighed, reaching over and squeezing my hand, "You're willing to die for them."
The crowd awed even louder and cheered at his words. They loved Riffian, "Ameria! My, my, you came back with a spaz! At the parade you showed with the beautiful white wings and now in this extravagant piece!"
"Thank you, I owe it to Flynn," I pointed towards the strangely tall dark skinned black man who was smiling and waving to everyone.
"Ameria, I have to ask," Cesar said, sounding intense. He squinted his eyes and dictated his words, "What are your thoughts on the Quell? This is your big comeback, we wanna know what you think."
The crowd stayed silent as they awaited for my response. I gulped and looked over at Riffian nervously, but he just stared as well, "Well, it feels... suffocating."
"Suffocating?" Cesar asked before shoving the microphone in my face, "Can you elaborate?"
"I mean, we're guaranteed a life of harmony once we win those games, but... But quite frankly life is the opposite of that. It's almost as if the ones who don't win have it easier," I sighed, looking down, "There's one thing about games... Once you're a player, there's no way out. You're trapped."
"Do you think the victory of this Quarter Quell will bring you the peace you've longed for?"
"I think we all long for something more than victory," I said, looking around in thought. I paused to build the tension, which caused Cesar's eyebrows to furrow and bring the microphone closer to my face, "We long for peace."
The crowd clapped less loudly than before, "Well, Ameria, Riffian, I truly wish the best for you two."
"Thank you, Cesar," Riffian nodded as we walked towards the stands where all the interviewed tributes stood. I walked and stood next to District 5, but next to them, I could see Finnick's stare on me. His smile was wide and he nodded with a little thumbs up.
"That was District 6, ladies and gentlemen!"