The Love We Never Had

By mildtogetherness

11.3K 233 20

Previously 'How to Be a Husband' - by AGoldenLannister (Edited and posted here with permission from previous... More

Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight - Part One
Chapter Eight - Part Two
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten

Chapter Three

967 22 0
By mildtogetherness

When Arya woke up she was incredibly hot, and there was a lot of noise. She groaned softly, opening her eyes, and finding herself incredibly startled to be looking at the faces of her ladies. And then she realized why she was hot, her face, was not resting on a pillow, it was resting on another face, Jaime's face, and his body was curved around hers, and his arms were so tight around her waist that she doubted she would be able to get out of his hold. And then her neck started to hurt, it had apparently been at this weird angle for quite awhile. Jaime's head was on a pillow, and underneath hers, so her head was at twice the height as normal for when she slept. And then she remembered: her ladies were still staring at her, looking very shocked and confused.

"Umm... hi..." Arya said stupidly to them, not yet trying to get out of Jaime's hold as she didn't want to wake him up yet.

"Hi. What are you thinking?" Krystine said to her sharply, crossing her arms over her chest in anger.

"What? I didn't do anything!" Arya said hotly. Suddenly frustrated that Krystine was even there.

"You didn't do anything? Really? You are in bed with a man who is not your husband!" Krystine said in a harsh whisper, suddenly remembering that that man was still sleeping behind her and probably wouldn't appreciate a servant yelling at his lady.

"You are correct, he is not my husband. But he will be! And we didn't even do anything! We just slept! Now get out all of you. Fetch water for my bath and do not ever come in here again without permission do you understand?!" Arya was mad now. Krystine was older than her, and had been her friend for many years. But that did not make it alright for her to come into her room and scold her like she was her child. Arya was a grown adult, and she is a Lady of house Stark, no servant had any right to chastise her. The servants behind Krystine automatically bowed and left, having never wanted anything to do with that conversation in the first place. Krystine hesitated though, still glaring at her lady.

"Krystine. If you do not leave this chamber at once I will have you sent back to Winterfell and you can be someone else's maid, maybe the cooks. Leave. Now." Arya was glaring at her now, Krystine frowned but nodded, sending a nasty look her way before leaving the room. Arya sighed and tried to reposition her neck so that it wouldn't hurt so badly, but apparently, even though he slept through the argument, her movement was enough to wake him up.

It took Jaime a minute to figure out what was going on. At first he thought the day before had been a dream and that this whole marriage had been cooked up in his mind and that Cersei was in bed with him. But then he realized that Cersei had never spent the night with him, to afraid of being caught, and the body he was holding was colder than his, which Cersei's was not, she always managed to be the same temperature. This body also smelled like honey and flowers and something else that he couldn't quite put his finger on but it smelled spicy. Arya. He was holding Arya. Why is her face on top of his face? Didn't they fall asleep with her on his chest?

"Good morning love." She whispered softly, turning her head to kiss him softly on the cheek. He felt a bright smile spread across his face, remembering what happened last night. He turned his face toward hers and put his hand on the back of her head, bringing her mouth down to meet his. It was a short kiss, but full of meaning and promise of more to come.

"Good morning baby." Oh how she adored his morning voice. It was just perfect. He was perfect, and she couldn't help but thank her lucky stars that she was matched with him and not one of the brutish Karstarks like what was originally planned for her life.

"You ready to get ready so we can go to the library?" Jaime murmured after kissing Arya again softly. She suddenly smiled, remembering that she would get to spend some time with Tyrion today. She nodded happily, and the next thing Jaime knew, she was up out of his arms heading into her room to get ready. Letting out a very large groan Jaime dropped his head back onto his pillow and covered his face with his arms.

After several hours Jaime and Arya had finally finished getting ready for the day and had breakfast, well really it was more of a brunch, as it was almost lunch time when they finally ate anything. After eating Jaime offered his arm to Arya, which she took automatically, and he began to lead her to the library. They talked about unimportant things on the way there, like the weather and how Jaime liked her outfit. When they arrived Jaime opened the door for her and when they walked in they saw that Tyrion was already sitting in the library with several books splayed out around him.

"Hello brother." Jaime said happily, leading Arya into the room while she looked around spell bound. The Lannister library was situated in a circular room, with tall ladders going up to the ceiling. The room went up several floors, and Arya was sure she would need to have other people fetch books for her if she needed one from too high up and she was deathly terrified of heights. Tyrion smiled up at Jaime from what he was reading and then glanced over at Arya, who was still looking around with a funny look on her face.

"Arya? Are you alright love?" Jaime said softly, looking at her, concerned after realizing she hadn't greeted Tyrion. She looked at him and then, before either of them knew what she was doing, she was throwing her arms around him and squealing happily.

"Oh Jaime it's beautiful! It's so much better than a dream! I can't believe this is your library! Why didn't you bring me here yesterday?! It's fantastic! Oh I can't believe I am going to live in a place with such an amazing library! Oh Jaime thank you thank you thank you!" Arya was kissing him now. Jaime was in shock. He didn't do anything except bring her to a room full of books and she had thrown herself on him, and was kissing him. In front of his brother! What happened to the girl that was afraid to sit on his lap in a somewhat concealed alcove?! Jaime kissed her back, of course, and wrapped his arms around her waist so she didn't have to hold herself up by his neck anymore. When she pulled away she spun out of his arms and started to look around again. Jaime looked over at Tyrion.

Tyrion found this woman marvelous. Not only was she making Cersei absolutely crazy with jealousy, but apparently she had ensnared Jaime's heart, and made him completely forget about their witch of a sister. Tyrion looked over at his brother with the biggest smile on his face.

"I like her." He said shortly, looking away from Jaime to look back at the girl who was running around the library like she would be able to see every book there just by running by it. Jaime, unable to help himself, watched her as well.

"I do too brother. I do too."

After an hour or two of sitting there watching his woman and his brother rave about history, there was a knock on the library door. When they called for whoever it was to enter, Jaime saw that it was his father's squire. He raised an eyebrow at the boy, as he was looking at him directly.

"Lord Tywin wishes to speak with you in his chambers Ser Jaime." The squire said softly, so as not to interrupt the lady and the dwarf who had not stop talking when he entered. Jaime scowled but nodded. He didn't want to leave Arya, he knew Tyrion wouldn't do anything to her, but he didn't know where Cersei was, and she definitely would. Besides, she was just so interesting. He didn't want to leave her side for even a moment. He sighed, standing up. Arya sensed his movement and looked over at him, to where he was now standing behind her. He eyebrows furrowed in confusion, not even having realized the squire had come in.

"I'm sorry Jaime, were we boring you? We can talk about something else..." She said, trailing off when he shook his head at her with a smile.

"No love, I've been summoned to go speak with father. I'll be back in a few minutes. Stay here with Tyrion?" He said the last part desperately, as if he didn't want her to go anywhere. She wondered why that was but nodded anyway. His smile looked relieved, and he bent down and give her a sweet kiss before turning and leaving silently out the door. Once in the hallway Jaime set his face into the stoney facial expression that was his everyday mask in the "before Arya" time of his life, it was what people were used to seeing, and it is the face his father expects when talking with his children.

When Jaime arrived at his father's door he began to wonder what it was that his father wanted with him. He would have thought that his father would be wanting him to spend all of his time with Arya. He knocked on the door.

"Enter." Tywin Lannister rumbled out in his 'I haven't spoken all day' voice. Jaime sighed, knowing this would more than likely be a long conversation. He opened the thick oak door, stepped inside, and tried to close it as silently as possible, as the door to his father's chamber tended to slam closed with even the slightest touch. Jaime looked over at his father who was seated at his desk, as per usual, and walked until he was only a few feet away from him.

"Father." He said in greeting, folding his hands behind his back. Tywin turned in his chair so he was facing Jaime, and laid his quill and the parchment he had been writing on down.

"Ah! Jaime, good. I wanted to talk to you." Tywin said, moving further out of his chair and heading towards his table that held refreshments.

"Wine?"

"No thank you father, water is fine." Tywin cocked an eyebrow at his son but filled a glass of water for him anyway. After handing Jaime his glass Tywin moved to the table situated on his balcony and motioned for Jaime to take a seat, he did so without question. After a few minutes of silence Jaime spoke up.

"I'm sorry father but what was it you wanted to talk to me about?" Jaime asked, setting his water down as he looked out over the ocean, trying not to let his father see how nervous he was.

"Right. How is it going with the Stark girl?" Jaime wasn't shocked at this question. In fact, it made him smile.

"Wonderful father. Arya is a magnificent woman, she really is." Jaime said, still not looking at his father, afraid he would punish him for actually liking the woman. Tywin nodded his head.

"Yes I thought you would like her from what Lord Rickard told me at court. Have you shown her the library yet? He said she likes to read." Tywin said thoughtfully, trying to remember things Rickard had said about his daughter. Jaime smiled, trying to make it unnoticeable.

"Yes father, I was there with her before you summoned me. She and Tyrion were debating the existence of White Walkers." Jaime almost chuckled before he remembered who he was talking to. His father scowled.

"The point is for her to fall in love with you boy. Not that dwarf." Tywin snarled out, suddenly on edge with the mention of his second son. Jaime frowned.

"That's not going to be a problem father, she has feelings for me, as I do her, this will work out splendidly for everyone." Tywin noticed that Jaime was confident in his answer, and decided to bring up the rumor he had been told by his daughter that morning.

"Yes... Cersei informed me of a rumor she heard this morning." Tywin watched as Jaime's face scrunched up in rage, the first he had ever seen his son do at the mention of his twin sister.

"Oh did she now." Jaime growled out, suddenly all the happiness he had felt that morning was gone, replaced with hatred towards his once most dear sister.

"Yes. She said that you and Lady Arya were found in bed together this morning, in various stages of undress." Tywin was very cautious as he spoke, knowing one wrong word could set his son off. Jaime could not help but laugh wholeheartedly at his father's rumor.

"Yes, that is true, however, we were dressed, in nightclothes. Nothing happened, but we did sleep in the same bed." Jaime said smiling now, seeing no reason not to tell his father this information.

"Well alright then, we can have the wedding in three days then. We wanted to give you two time to acquaint yourselves, but, seeing as you have already done that, we can move ahead. Does that sound reasonable?" Tywin asked, suddenly very matter-of-fact about the whole thing. Jaime was shocked, but wedding of lords and ladies did normally happen fast, they were lucky to even be able to meet before saying the words. So Jaime nodded. Under normal circumstances he would have wanted to ask Arya, but he knew his father wouldn't allow it, would say that women shouldn't make the decisions for a man. So he kept silent, and hoped that Arya would be alright with it when he told her later that day.

"Good. Now that is settled, you may go back to her now, I'm sure you've been dying to since you left her." Tywin said, somewhat rudely, but Jaime didn't care. He nodded, stood up, and walked out the door. He made it back to the library in what felt like half the time it took him to leave it, which he did not mind at all, and when he opened the door he found Arya and Tyrion still sitting together talking about the First Men. At the sound of the door opening Arya turned around, and should couldn't help but to beam at the man she was going to marry.

"Jaime! I'm so glad you're back! We were just talking about the First Men, would you like to join us?" Arya said, sounding more excited than Jaime had ever heard her. He couldn't help but smile at her. To Arya this smile looked different, there was an added feeling behind his eyes that she couldn't quite put her finger on. So she ignored it and held her hand out to him. Jaime took her extended hand without question and she gently pulled him closer, when he was right up against the back of her chair she pulled him down and gave him a short but firm kiss on the mouth and then smiled when he sat down, still holding her hand. She turned back around to Tyrion who was looking at them with a strange look on his face. Arya couldn't help but wonder what was running through his mind.

"What is it Tyrion? Why are you looking at us like that?" Arya said softly, kindly, so as not to make him think that she minded him looking at them. Tyrion blinked at her a few times, looking like she had surprised him.

"I'm sorry. It's just I've never seen anything like it."

"Like what?"

"Well, just the way you two seem to know what is going on in each others heads, without even needing to speak. You just know. It's beautiful, really. I hope I have something like it someday." Tyrion shocked the pair as they both turned to look at each other, eyes wide, until they thought about it, and they both seemed to come to the realization that he was right at the same time. Jaime leaned in and kissed Arya, softly, but it lasted longer than the ones they had in front of Tyrion before. When Jaime pulled away he really wanted to get away from his brother, and just spend some time with his woman. So he stood up and looked down at her, still holding her hand.

"Do you want to talk a walk with me?" He asked her softly. Arya glanced over at Tyrion, and he nodded, so she stood up and followed Jaime out the door.

After walking around the Rock for almost half an hour Jaime led Arya to a bench in the middle of a beautiful garden where he asked her to sit with him. When she complied he took her hand in his and looked at her, suddenly nervous. Arya could see the nervousness written all over his face and felt herself become nervous as well. What if Tywin wanted to speak with Jaime to tell him she had to leave?

"What's going on Jaime?"

"You know that father asked me to talk with him a little bit ago."

"Yes, what did he want to talk with you about?"

"Well, he said, that since we are getting along so well that he is going to move the wedding up, to three days from now. I told him that would be okay, but I wanted to check with you as well." Arya smiled, oh well that wasn't as bad as she thought it was going to be! Jaime was still looking at her nervously so she squeezed his hands.

"That's perfectly fine with me Jaime, really! I don't mind, we were lucky to have any time together before the marriage." Jaime's face suddenly relaxed into a soft smile and he nodded, pulling her in for a gentle kiss.

"Great, well now thats settled, how about dinner?"Jaime said softly, still holding her hands, and giving them a little squeeze. She nodded happily, still not seeming to mind their impending nuptials but Jaime was still a little hesitant about her willingness to be with him. However he kept his mouth shut, and nodded back before standing up, and when she rose as well he tucked her hand into his arm and began to lead them up to his chambers, thinking a private dinner would be nice. When they arrived, he opened the door for her, like a proper gentleman, and proceeded to close it behind them.

"So what would you like for dinner love? I can have the kitchen make us some chicken, or lamb if you would prefer that, whatever you want." Jamie said as he guided her towards the small table near the window that had quickly become his and Arya's favorite spot. He pulled the chair out for her, and she gracefully sat down, making sure that her skirts didn't get caught up in the feet of the chair.

"How about... grapes, and some lemon chicken? And maybe some sort of vegetable, if there are any in season?" Arya said hesitantly, not used to being asked what she wanted for dinner, instead she was normally just served whatever the kitchen had on hand since the North did not have a stable crop yield.

Jaime nodded down at her quickly, and leaned down to press a kiss to her forehead.

"Very well my dear, let me just find someone to go and fetch that for us and I will be right back, any request for drinks?"

"Do you happen to have Pomegranate Juice? A Septon gave me a glass when we stopped near Oxcross and it was amazing." Arya could not control the blush at the look Jaime gave her whenever she spoke. It was like he was trying to memorize every word she said, even the incredibly mundane things such as a drink. He nodded at her, smiling a little at her blush.

"I'll have them look, I have never had it, we can have it together if they can find some. I'll be right back darling, make yourself comfortable, I shouldn't be too long." He leaned down, and kissed her firmly on the mouth, lingering longer than he ever had, allowing him to take in the taste of her, and she tasted sweet, like honey. When he pulled away Arya still had her eyes closed, almost in a daze, and before she opened them he had already pulled away and had left his chambers, smirking at his ability to completely disarm her.

It took a few minutes to find a servant, the majority must be working on preparations for the wedding, as well as the cleanup from the supper the night before. When he did find one though, the girl was carrying a large mass of linens, piled above her head. She was walking away from him, so he sped up his pace to catch up with her.

"Excuse me! Girl!" He said, quite loudly as she was several paces in front of him, but she heard him, and quickly whirled around to face the voice. She looked like a typical Lannisport girl, so Jaime knew she probably knew his voice, and might be a spy for his father, or his sister, so he quickly pulled the mask down over his face to hide any form of emotion. No need for rumors to start that he had gone soft. When he reached her she quickly curtsied, so low that she almost sat on the ground.

"Yes Mi' Lord?" She asked in her very lowborn accent. Jaime felt his eyes narrow but didn't say anything. Most of the servants here were well spoken, it was a pride of his father's, that most of the household be able to communicate properly with visitors. So either she was new, which is possible if his father thought the staff would need more help with the addition of the Starks, or she was an imposter.

"Who do you serve girl?" He asked bluntly, hoping she would said she was just a new scullery maid.

"I am one of Mi' Lady Cersei's new handmaidens, she sent me to fetch 'er new sheets since I am new and dunno how to fix 'er hair." She said quietly, looking at the floor as she spoke in her very uneducated speech. Jaime nodded, relieved knowing that Cersei had requested a new handmaiden since she believed one of her old ones was stealing from her.

"Right, well My Lady Stark and I are eating in my chambers, so after you drop off those linens, run to the kitchen and tell them that we want grapes, lemon chicken and whatever vegetables look good sent up to my room, along with Pomegranate Juice if they have any." She nodded quickly, looking like she was thinking quickly, trying to remember everything he said.

"Yes Mi' Lord." She said curtsying again before turning to walk away. Jaime did the same until he remembered something he almost forgot.

"Oh, and make sure my squire brings the food and drink to my chambers." He watched her nod quickly before she almost ran away from him in her haste to complete the tasks he had set for her. Jaime chuckled a little bit before turning away to go back to his chambers. On the way back he passed by Cersei's door, he wished that there was another way back to his chambers, but he would rather walk by her door than though the servant quarter's which was the only alternate route from where he was. And of course, his reservations had standing because right before he turned the corner to go down the staircase he heard her door open and then a voice speak in a voice more confident then he had ever heard a proper lady speak.

"Well hello brother, trying to ignore me are you? Well I wonder why that could be? Could it be that there is something that you don't want Little Miss Perfect to know? Something like a little bit of debauchery?" 

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