JACINTH
"Ughhh!"
"T-topher... uhhh."
"Jacinth... hngg..."
FUCK!
Putangina.
What have you done, Jacinth?
I slapped myself to let me know if this was all real and that's when I realized that I created a huge mistake.
Shit.
I have given in my virginity to Topher.
Fuck.
Hanggang ngayon ramdam ko pa rin ang sakit sa may puson ko but I can't hold it with my hands because I'm freaking tied on bed with no clothes on!
What have I submitted myself into? Bakit ko ba pinasok ang lahat ng ito?
I don't have any choice right now but to cry... to cry the pain that I can feel right now, physically, emotionally and mentally.
I'm tired. I'm hella tired. Pero ako naman ang pumayag na magkaganito ang buhay ko diba? I am the one who agreed in this fucking scheme that, that psycho Topher wants.
It's all for my friends. It's all for Axle, Freya and the souls of our other friends. But why does it feel like I made a very bad decision? Because I know that if I can talk to them right now and ask them if they're happy with what I am doing for them, I know that they'll say no.
Naiyak pa rin ako ngayon dahil wala naman akong magagawa kung hindi umiyak nang umiyak. I'm helpless. You're helpless, Jacinth.
"You're helpless, Jacinth."
"I know that you'll like it."
"Am I better than Axle?"
Fuck. No.
I tried to recall what happened last night but it only made me cry more. He d-drugged me. Topher drugged me. I was not in my sane state last night but now that I am, I know that I made a really bad mistake.
I didn't know okay? I didn't know anything that have happened last night. Hindi ko alam kung bakit at paano ko nagawa iyon.
But the thing that keeps on lingering on my mind right now is Axle. A-axle.. I'm sorry. You were so precious. How could I betray you?
I'm hoping that you'll understand what had happened to me. But I, myself, knows that what I did was wrong. At hinding hindi ko na maibabalik pa ang oras. I should've controlled myself last night. If it weren't for the drug...
My sobs got weaker as the sun started to go up. The first rays of sunshine illuminated the room where I am right now. The yellow beam of light kissed my bare skin and I felt hot by it.
Tinagilid ko ang katawan ko para maitago ko ang nakabuyangbuyang kong pagkababae. The white piece of blanket barely even covered my fair skin.
I looked to the mirror in front of me and I looked like a zombie. With those thick dark eyebags right under my eyes. Pale face and lips. But what shocked me is that I am not crying anymore. Maybe I am tired by doing that all night. I cried but until now.
A loud screeching sound of the door can be heard and it was opened ajar. Alam ko na anytime the demon can enter this room so I readied myself and I tried to find something that I can use against him. But with these cuffs in my hand, I doubt that I could reach one.
He opened the door ever so slowly as if he was teasing me but his charms (yuck) won't affect my sane state. How could he...
Kinunot ko ang noo ko and I looked at him with my deadliest glare the moment he stepped his foot in this room. Para naman siyang tanga na parang nakakita ng masarap na putahe na nakahain sa kanya. At normal times, I would feel harrassed just by his stares but I could not contain the anger that I was feeling when I remembered all the thing he had done to us.
I compared it with what we've done to him. Pero hindi ko pa rin lubos maisip kung papaano niya nagawa ang lahat ng ito. He already gave the reason and that's me but I still couldn't believe that he could do those just because he loves me. Is that the power of love?
Is he really in love with me? Or is he just obsessed with me? Those were two different things, and personally, I wouldn't call obsession as love because love would sacrifice one's self just for the sake of the other. Pero wala na siyang puso. He isn't in love with me. He's obviously obsessed with me.
"Hayop ka!" I shouted at him but he just returned that with a laugh.
He walked towards me kaya medyo napaatras ako sa higaan kahit wala na akong iaatras pa. He leaned onto me and whispered, "Are you ready for a second round?"
I froze at what he said. I thought that I wouldn't cry again but by hearing that question from him made a tear from my left eye fall.
Ayoko na. Can't he just stop? I'm willing to be his slave but not this kind of slave. Wala na akong nagawa but to cry and cry again. Crying is my last resort when I couldn't do anything.
"Hush," he tried to calm me down but because it was him, I wouldn't calm down. "Don't cry sweetie. I hate to see gorgeous ladies crying."
Well. Fuck you.
You call yourself a gentleman? Well, how ungentleman of you.
He was about to pick up the only thing that barely covers my body but was halted when a loud crashing of something can be heard from a distance.
"Fuck," he grunted then went out of the room. I was mentally thanking whoever was the reason of that loud noise because Topher haven't done anything to me. Mahirap man, I tried to reach my face to wipe off the tears from it. I hate to see myself crying.
I promise that I won't cry anymore.
I won't.
Topher's loud shouts could be heard right now followed by several gunshots. Hindi ko alam kung gaano katagal and tinagal ng mga putok ng baril na iyon pero ang alam ko lang ay napakahaba ng tinagal noon.
I got a little nervous for myself because I know that my life is in the once again from this unfamiliar trespasser. Alam ko rin na nagkaputukan sila ng baril ni Topher so I knew that he has a gun.
Wait... Baka si ano ito... Sana...
Iniisip ko pa lang kung sino ang gusto kong makita ngayon when the door of this room suddenly opened and it revealed the person whom I wanted to see right now.
"A-axle..." I called him.
He looked down on my exposed body and mumbled a curse. Inalis niya ang jacket sa katawan niya and he covered it onto my body saka niya inalis ang handcuffs gamit ang baril na hawak niya.
I wanted to cry right now but because I promised myself that I won't ever cry, I did not. But deep inside, I was so happy that he saved me.
Naalis na sa akin ang posas na kanina'y nakakabit sa kamay ko and it left some red marks on my wrists. Inayos ko rin ang pagkakasuot ko ng jacket ni Axle and because it was so long for me, it covered what should be covered.
"I miss you, Jacinth," Axle suddenly said out of the blue.
I looked at him teary eyed but no tears escaped my eyes. "I love you," I told him.
"I love you more," he said as he enveloped his arms all over me.
How I miss his familiar scent. How I miss the familiar warmth of his body. I thought I would never feel this way again.
But I constantly blame myself for whatever I have done last night. I feel like I was cheating with Axle.
"A-axle..." I called his name.
He looks a little bit confused with my reaction but he just hugged me tighter.
"Shhhh," he tried to calm me and I calmed down. "It's okay I understand."
His voice screamed assurance after I said what have I done but I can see that his knuckles closed tightly.
He finally let go of the embrace after a couple of minutes then placed his hand in front of me. I placed my hand over it.
"Let's go?" he asked me and I nodded.
We walked outside the room and I could see countless of lifeless body lying on the ground with bulletholes all over their body. A body caught my eyes because it was brutally murdered and I could tell that it was Topher, judging by the clothes.
Finally, I think we have gotten the justice we all deserve.
Masaya ako ngayon. I am happy now that I am with Axle.
I am beside the person with a big machine gun on his hand while his other hand was firmly holding mine.
I love you, Axle... Thank you for saving me...
-+-
Author's Note: Binalikan ko 'tong part na 'to, because I want to clarify something. S3x is consensual, and if walang consent from one person to the point na finoforce siya, that's rape. Kahit pa sabihin na the victim felt something from the s3xual assault, that's not a valid reason para sabihing ginusto niya rin ang nangyari. Women's private part automatically lubes itself during a force entry, and 0rgasms are normal responses of our bodies during s3xual activities. Same as men, 3jaculation doesn't mean he/she liked what happened. The victims have no proper control over their body during a s3xual attack.