Part 1
Nate
Things had taken a turn for the best for me. It was only a matter of time before Ryn came back to me, like I always thought she would. I couldn't stop myself visualizing us as a couple.
But, first things first. I had told Ryn that I gave her a week to make up her mind. It was so much torture seeing her close yet so far away in the past month, and I wasn't ready to entertain another round of that.
I was so happy when she confessed to returning my feelings yesterday that I couldn't shake my smile off my face. I always pictured the two of us together, from the moment I laid eyes on her that fateful day, but now that it was almost happening I couldn't get a better version of us.
"OK this is bordering insanity. Would you tell me what is going on, and why you look so smug?" Ray decided to finally ask.
"Ryn admitted to having feelings for me yesterday in Chemistry class." I couldn't contain it anymore. I had to let Ray know.
" isn't she dating your cousin? " the confusion was clear from his tonal voice.
" Yeah, she said she might have been leading him on. She's going to talk to him and clear things out, then give me...us a chance. I'm so excited and so worried, I don't want to ruin this for us."
" Mate, you're really blind. If you ask me, I think she's just toying with you. I can't believe you're falling for her traits again. She was in love with your cousin for two years bro, two years. You think she's just going to throw that away for you? How long have you two known each, not even remotely close to the time they were together. " I trusted Ryn and I knew she wouldn't do anything to hurt me. Not purposely. Whatever Ray was getting at, it was unnerving me.
"It takes only a second to fall in love with someone Ray. I don't care if I haven't known her longer than Caleb has, I love her. I don't think I have loved someone before and I have nothing to compare this feeling with but its the best feeling ever. This overwhelming sweet pain in my chest that threatens to drown me every time I see her face, its a feeling unlike any other. I didn't know loving someone could be so painfully sweet until I met her, in fact I didn't know what loving someone was until I met her. I just know she was going to be the end of me. I know all this may sound crazy to you Ray but I have never understood myself better than in this moment. I have never been so sure of anything my entire life."
" I thought you wanted to keep a low profile this year, what happened to that. And I thought bad girls were an allergy of yours, again what changed? I don't approve of your mismatched feelings for her. If you haven't heard, she broke Jack's heart and if that's not reason enough for you, she is going to break your cousin's heart too, what makes you think she won't do the same to you?" He made a perfectly clear point but my mind was already made up.
"I don't. That's the point Ray, if you love someone, you'd be willing to overlook everything else just to be with them. I have no assurance that we would last forever, but who said forever is something I wanted. I always thought love and relationships were overrated, she turned everything around for me. One day, when you get to experience this, you will understand everything I am saying. I wasn't like this myself, but a few months of knowing her was all it took to change everything."
It was true. It only took me a few months to realize that forever is not what mattered to me, but moment by moment with her was enough to make me feel alive. And I looked forward to many more moments with her.
"Clearly I can't argue with you in this state." He gave up on trying.
"What state?" I was genuinely interested now.
"You're obviously smitten Nate. You speak of her as though she's some sort of god and you subscribed to her religion. Arguing with you will be futile. A waste of good energy." Was I that obvious?
I decided to give Ryn and I space. I didn't want to overwhelm her with my presence to a point where she felt obligated to pick me. I also needed the time to clear my head.
Neilani had been throwing subtle indications of interest towards me and I didn't know what to do with that. On rare occasions, she would flirt with me albeit lightly but I noted the hints.
"What about Neilani?" Ray questioned.
"What about her?" I feigned nonchalance.
"She likes you, that's as clear as day." Looked like I wasn't the only who noticed her advances.
" You know I don't fancy Neil like that."
" Don't tell me, tell that to her. I'd hate to see two girls fight over you and poor thing she wouldn't stand a chance against Ryn. Did you know that she was a boxer?"
" Neil? No way. She couldn't hurt a fly, even if her life depended on it." I chuckled. The was girl was just so afraid it was hilarious. She hated anything that crawled, loathed every flying insects and despised whatever kind of animal she couldn't name and she was always jumpy. Even her own clothes scared her sometimes.
"I'm talking about Ryn. I hear she was an underground fighter. Have you ever been to any of her fights. I bet she's bad ass."
She'd never told me about that. I guess it was one if the many mysteries that made Ryn Clarence who she was. I was planning on knowing each and everyone of them.
People were so nice to me and my group back at school. I wasn't the invisible nerd anymore. Even Ryn's friends seemed to be friendly towards me. They'd strike a conversation with me once in a while at the hallway.
Despite the distance and space Ryn and I promised each other, I couldn't shake the constant worry I had for her.
Would she be alright?
Ever since we last talked, I hadn't seen her anywhere near school grounds. I was getting frustrated by the day. I hoped she was alright wherever she was.
When Friday finally knocked on our doors I was so happy that I couldn't contain myself. If the rest of the group noticed, they didn't bring it up. After school that day, I drove home straight up and freshened up before I took a nap. A much much needed nap. Throughout the week, I looked like a sleep deprived animal and I felt like I needed the sleep more than anything.
When 7:00pm arrived, I decided to take a trip to make favorite place. On the hill. The sky was beautifully clear and I knew I would see the stars tonight.
After parking my BMW on the side of the road, I grabbed my earphones and my iPhone and headed straight for the tree I loved to lay under. As I approached, I could make out a figure slouched against the tree. The person had their head between their legs and they were in a sitting position.
"Ryn, is that you?" Realization dawned on me that she had been crying an awful lot before I arrived.
"What are you doing here Nate?" Her voice came out horse. I guess it was from all the crying. She looked utterly defeated, like the fate of the world was on her shoulders.
"I could ask you the same thing. This is my favorite place, I love to come here once in a while. What's your excuse?"
She went quiet. Like she couldn't bare to elicit another word out of me. Her shoulder sagged in defeat before she proceeded to lay flat on her back and watched the stars shine.
Seeing I wasn't going to gauge any reaction out if her, I laid myself next to her as we watched the stars together, in silence. A very dreadful silence. I felt like I had done something wrong, even though I didn't know what.
"What's wrong Ryn. I hate seeing you like this."
Silence.
She wasn't making this any easy for me and I didn't want to jump to conclusions, because I was so good at that.
"I'm not going to ask again, just know I'm here, I'll be ready to listen when you're ready to talk."
A few hours passed by and no one made a move to talk to the other or go home. I was almost giving up before she decided to open up. She turned to the side to face me and I reciprocated. We were now facing each other. She looked so sad it was heartbreaking.
Then suddenly she drew her hand to my head and started touching my hair.
" I love playing with your hair. I love putting my fingers in here and feeling the softness of your locks. " She admitted with a shy smile.
"And I love your beautiful orbs. They are so endearing I always feel like I'm drowning. And the smell of your body wash makes me want to cling to you like a second skin."
She smiled. Genuinely smiled. I couldn't help but smile back. She looked so beautiful it was almost painful to watch her smile.
"I just found out that my mother and my sister were hiding a very huge secret from me."
I didn't know what to do. Do I prompt her to proceed? Do I remain silent and listen? I just knew I couldn't upset her, whatever happened had drained her of energy.
"Ryn, I don't want you to feel obliged to tell me anything. You know I wouldn't judge you for staying silent." I didn't want to force anything out of her. I might be re opening long healed wounds.
"I want to." That was enough to silence me. The fact that she always found me worthy of sharing her secret and letting me help. " I love that I can silence you with just my words, and when you blush, oh boy, that would qualify to be my favorite show." My blush only deepened and I covered my face with the palm of my hands but she removed my hands and held them in her own before touching her forehead to mine. Our noses were touching as well.
The feel of her subtle touches was so electrifying that I couldn't look her in the eyes. I was afraid she was going to see how vulnerable I felt in her heated gaze.
"Open your eyes." She commanded. I found myself obliging and taking heavy breaths as her presence suddenly felt overwhelming.
" I'm going to kiss you now." I found no strength to utter a single word. I felt her hot breath on my lips before her mouth descended on mine with a hunger I couldn't fathom. "God, I missed this." She mumbled into the kiss. Her mouth did perfect wonders as she slightly bit my bottom lip causing me to release a breathy moan. "Ryn." I mumbled somewhat flustered as my hands involuntarily found their way to her hair and I tugged earning me a moan. The kiss got more intense I felt hot in places I never thought possible. She dragged my right hand to her bum and placed it there and I immediately squeezed bringing us closer than we were. The feeling of her hips under my palms was so heavenly and I couldn't control my ragged breath. My hands found their way to the swell of her right breast and I slightly squeezed. "Nate, oh god." Her kiss was with brutal force I never thought she possessed. When I lowered my hand to her upper calves, roaming the rest of her she whimpered breathlessly.
"I could do this forever and not get bored." She mumbled before pushing me slightly away to catch her breath." As much as I would love to continue with this, I think we should stop now before we do something we would regret later. "
"That was... wow." I was lost for words. Ryn could be so gentle with me but I didn't know aggressive her was equally arousing. " I have never been kissed like that before. You were so brutal yet I couldn't have my fill of you." She was already a drug to me. I couldn't have enough.
"That makes two of us. I have never kissed someone like that before either. Caleb was always so careful with me, like I was some porcelain doll." I brought my fingers to trace my lips, where Ryn's had been not so long ago. She had kissed me with so much passion, like she was trying to mark her territory. I brought her towards me and spooned her under the skylights. I'd never spooned anyone before, but with her everything felt so natural.
"We'll talk about everything tomorrow, right now I just want to relish in your embrace." I told her as I caressed her. My palm traced her arm to her hips repeatedly and she seemed to enjoy the pattern and feel of my hands on her. Her back was practically glued to my front and I Nuzzled my face into the crook of her neck as I beamed.
"You're smiling aren't you?" She smiled equally amused.
" if some one would have told me a few months ago that you and I would end up spooning each other on the top of a hill like the love birds that we are, I could have totally recommended them a psychiatric ward."
" I knew that our paths were bound to cross the moment I saw you on my first day. What I didn't know was that I was going to fall helplessly in love with you. In case I haven't already told you this, I am fucking falling hard for you Nathaniel Wellington Adams."
"I've loved you longer than I could admit to myself Ryn. I love you to the throes of foreboding. I want to ask you to be my girlfriend but I know you are yet to break up with Caleb. I'm losing it here, every single day you spend with him, break up with him already, I don't think I can wait any longer."
"Eager aren't we? I'm going to break up with him tomorrow don't worry. Besides we haven't been talking since Tuesday when I found out about the secret they were keeping from me."
"Hold on, Caleb's also involved in that? Now I'm curious." I had promised to approach the issue tomorrow but by the look of things, it seemed to be graver than Ryn made it look. I wouldn't be surprised to know she already forgave them like that. She was so kind it surprised me too. How someone as tough as her could be so kind and sweet by the inside.
"We'll talk about it tomorrow." She threw my words back in my face. " Right now I just want you to hold me like you never wanna let go."
"I never wanna let go Ryn."
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Edited. Enjoy!