[A/N: special note at the end, please read and let me know in the comments! Your help is much appreciated, thank you:)]
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Slowly but surely, the dreadful week was leading up to the exciting game day, Friday.
After all that's happened during the past few days, everyone was glad to have a refreshing game awaiting them. It was a nice way to end the stressful week, especially for Hoseok and Yoongi.
For the two, the only thing that's been occupying their time and keeping them busy are annoying anxieties that won't leave them alone. Paranoia, anxious protruding thoughts, and not to mention the lack of sleep because of all of this- to say they were both exhausted would be a vast understatement.
However, out of the two of them, Yoongi was taking it the hardest.
On top of balancing school work and sustaining his grades, the male had been non-stop practicing every single day. Sore muscles, under eye bags, and more prominent shakiness and fidgeting did not go unnoticed by his friends.
Several times throughout the week, all six of them had done nothing but comforted Yoongi, always asking if there was something they could help with, in hopes that his workload would be lightened.
Yet, despite their persistent offers and begging, Yoongi shooed them off and always responded with a blatant, "Thanks, but it's my problem not yours."
All being quite frustrated that the boy wouldn't fess up and allow them to assist him in anyway shape or form, they eventually let it go as to not stress out the elder even more than he already was.
Because they knew that Yoongi hated getting help, especially in a form of pity. It only added on to his already large amount of stress that constantly weighs him down, so even though they didn't want to, the others sided with letting it go.
But, they did remind Yoongi once more that if he ever needed any help or aid with anything, they'd be by his side in the blink of an eye.
Hoseok was the one to emphasize this several times.
And when I say several, I mean several.
Nearly everyday, or a few times a day. Either it being in a form of text or verbally, it was almost impossible for Yoongi not to have it engraved in his mind.
'Okay, but if you ever need any help please don't be shy to ask me, Yoongi.'
'Thanks Hoseok, but I assure you I'll be fine,' the male reassured, letting out a small chuckle.
Hesitantly patting his shoulders before departing from the elder, Hoseok let the topic go before sending Yoongi one last comforting smile. One that was filled with sweet serenity, Yoongi was confident his smile tasted like honey.
That was said yesterday, just the second after their sixth period class before Hoseok rushed off to his dance course. After the male left, Yoongi stood there with a big stupid yet admirable grin plastered on his face, causing his very squishy cheeks to rise up in effect.
Slightly mimicking a mochi of some sort.
It felt nice to have someone care about you and checking up on your well being daily. Even before Hoseok arrived at the new school, Yoongi's friends never forgot to always establish that they'd be by his side no matter what.
And that was the best feeling in the world.
But, with Hoseok, it felt different somehow.
Perhaps it was the fact that they're relarionship didn't start off the smoothest, which Yoongi took full blame for and every time he recalled his harsh actions a ping of guilt immediately stabbed him in the chest.
And for that reason, Hoseok's actions came off as sweeter than any other person who may have done the same. Because it showed just how selfless and kind-hearted Jung Hoseok could be.
Which, Yoongi was not at all surprised by whatsoever.
Right when Hoseok entered the friend group, he radiated this intense feeling of high spirits and innocence, one that had never hit Yoongi so strongly before.
Even when he didn't particularly take interest in the boy, it would be a lie to say he hadn't thought he was the sweetest person alive. Hell, someone from a different school would say the same thing just from watching the happy and joyful boy skip down a sidewalk.
With a heart shaped smile, squinted eyes from the wide grin, and a happy little prance, Hoseok could attract anyone or everyone towards him.
Because who wouldn't want to be surrounded by a little bundle of joy?
Well, apparently Yoongi, but at least the dense male moved passed his grudges and began to ultimately warm up to him.
Currently, the said boy was riding the train home from school, his mint-haired head buried into his phone. Music blasted through his air pods, to which Yoongi freely bobbed his head up and down to, basking in the peaceful moment with no worries.
And at any chance he got, Yoongi always made sure to cherish times like these.
Free of worries.
Just Yoongi in his own little world, blocking out the bigger and scarier reality as he enjoyed his own made up fantasy.
A fantasy with no regrets that continuously picked at his skin, where he didn't have to worry about anyone hating him, and where all his relations were stable and healthy.
But, of course, life was like that.
Bumpy roads were essential for life, if someone didn't experience some drawbacks then, what was the point? From those mistakes and regrets, one learns and improves their own self to move forward, and progress to a better future.
And, Yoongi hates to admit it, but at times like this he was jealous of Hoseok.
Whenever he happened to lay his eyes on the younger male, not once had he seen him not smiling or laughing with someone, instantly creating this jubilant atmosphere around them. Yoongi doubted Hoseok had any bad relationships with anyone, as the younger was just too sweet for anyone to hate on his pure heart.
He was envious of the fact that Hoseok blended in to the friend group so well by the first day, mixing as if he had known them for years. Sure, Hoseok was awkward and still is, but that was apart of his goofy charm.
Perhaps that was one of the many reasons Yoongi formed this simple minded and unnecessary resentment towards the brunet.
Because it took practically a couple years for Yoongi to build up the relationship he had with his friends, while with Hoseok it naturally came to him.
That made his skin boil.
And as much as Yoongi hates himself for it, scolded himself constantly telling himself that it wasn't Hoseok's fault, there was still that underlying jealousy.
And Yoongi wanted nothing more than to rip it out and burn it in a never ending fire.
It didn't help that Hoseok had nothing but good intentions, and was already insecure about people disliking him as it is. The subtle thought made Yoongi's heart break, and only made him blame himself more.
He was the cause of any unhappiness that Hoseok endured.
Or at least, that's what Yoongi told himself.
If only the male knew how much that wasn't true, but atlas, theres so much the two oblivious boys don't know about each other. Which pains them both endlessly.
Because both Yoongi and Hoseok want to know more about one another, they want to understand their internal struggles and past life experiences, since that was the reason why the two had an unsteady part in their relationship right off the bat.
It was all just a simple misunderstanding of each other's feelings and intentions.
Snapping out of his thoughts, Yoongi slowly opened his eyes from his daydream as he heard his arrival street being called through the intercom,
'Up next, Madison Rd'
Sighing heavily, the male stood up tossing his large and book-filled backpack over his shoulder, as his hand grabbed at a pole nearby as to balance himself on the rocky train.
Finally seeing his stop come into view from the train window, Yoongi hastily stepped out along with other passengers and began his walk home.
It wasn't too cold out, but the chill breeze bit at Yoongi's delicate skin, causing the boy to shiver beneath the grey skies and cool air. He was just thankful it wasn't raining, as it usually is, since he would end up getting soaked and afterwards catch a cold.
Through aching muscles, his toned yet tired legs managed to carry his sturdy body the few blocks it took to reach home.
It nearly killed his energy-drained self, as with every step his breath only hitched and grew shorter, as by the end of it he was practically gasping for air on his doorstep with bright red and panting cheeks.
When Yoongi did reach the long awaited porch, he let himself collapse onto the stone paved steps right away, barely caring if his neighbors sent quizzical or judgmental stares.
Because at this point, Yoongi had no energy left, barely enough to make it though his doorway entry. Kicking off his shoes basically stripped away the last of it, causing the boy to just reside in working on his homework in the kitchen as he was sure he would pass out if he even attempted to move upstairs.
But, Yoongi wasn't upset because he was in physical pain.
No.
He was disappointed that he couldn't spend the next six hours or so shooting hoops, heavily practicing or exercising himself to his full extent.
I'm so weak, Yoongi mumbled to himself, only wanting to do warm ups or conditioning in preparation for the game.
I cant even handle simple practices anymore, what the f*ck is wrong me with?
I'm so pathetic, Mom and Dad worked so hard to get our family where we are yet here I am, crying because I can barely do simple drills.
Letting the buildup of anger and self resentment build up, Yoongi couldn't hold back anymore before he let out a blood curling and agitated scream.
Because in his mind, he had already lost.
🍓hope u enjoyed ༼ つ ◕◡◕ ༽つ!
🍼also, for chapters like these where it's a bit heavier with more self degrading thoughts and such, would you guys like a trigger warning? I never really thought about putting one, but my worst fear is upsetting people. Please let me know, thank you 🥺💖!
🍓editor/assistant: jiminie_cricket_