Hello guys, thank you for your continued support. I love you all so much. I started another book called azure, please check it out and tell me what you think. Its called Azure; The blood of the standing Oren but you can check it out on my profile.
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This chapter is dedicated to @WillaAlanon .
Ryn
I was in my bed tossing and turning. I couldn't sleep a wink. My head kept going back to the activities of the day.
My fight with Caleb
My time with Nate
The kiss.
All my thoughts orbited around those things but ended with the kiss.
I was glad I was finally going to straighten things out with Caleb and I dreaded how the talk would go tomorrow after school. Would he be willing to explain his side? Did he still have feelings for me? Would we ever get back together?
All those questions kept jamming in my head, making it more difficult to get any sleep.
My mind went back to Nate and what we'd talked about. I thought that he was really brave to do something like that, giving me an ultimatum knowing that the odds were not in his favor. He was well aware that I would always choose Caleb first, yet he gave me that option still.
Not many guys are capable of such a thing. I knew I had feelings for him truth be told, I just wasn't sure to what extent.
Sleep finally seemed to overpower me and I succumbed to the endless darkness.
That morning, I woke up with renewed energy. As I looked outside my window, I saw my bike parked at the driveway.
Nate must have brought it back after I left it at his place.
I prepared myself for school and went downstairs to get breakfast.
After taking my breakfast and dumping my dishes on the sink, I grabbed an apple and made my way out of the house.
I revved my bike to life and took off with a smirk on my face. My bike was my best friend, aside from Kate of course. It had been long since Kate and I spent some time together. I missed her. But I was going to meet her at lunch today.
Time moved insanely slow and I just wanted the day to end so I get it over with. Before I left that evening, I saw Nate talking with his friends at his locker and I approached him.
" Hey."
No one greeted back. Just Ray who hesitated before answering shyly. The rest were just giving me strange looks and the Neilani girl was glaring at me.
"Do you still have time to finish the assignment we were supposed to do yesterday?" Not that I cared a damn minute about the assignment, I just wanted to spend time with someone who has always been there for me in my most vulnerable moments of my life.
"I finished it yesterday when you went back home." He answered dejectedly as he gave me a sympathetic nod and went on to talk to his friends.
I understood why he was giving the cold shoulder. He was still hurt by the entire thing, I mean I would be too.
"See you around nerdy boy." Not wanting to push my luck, I turned around and headed for the parking lot. People had already started talking and I didn't want to be their center of attention. At least not now.
Fifteen minutes later, I was at Nates door ringing his door bell.
The door opened only to reveal a shirtless Caleb who looked as handsome as ever.
"Can we talk?" My voice came out timidly. I always was afraid of Caleb and after so many years of not talking, his presence up close sent into a pathetic frenzy.
"That depends. Are you going to Punch me again?" He smirked. He seemed to be in a good mood today.
"Sorry about that. Are you okay though." I said as my hand reached out to touch his nose then realized what I was doing and quickly drew my hand back.
He swiftly caught my hand in his large one and returned it back to where it was. His touch felt strange and foreign and that really confused me.
"Forgive my manners, please come on in. Its just that seeing you again after so long just made me forget." He directed me to the couch.
I sat on my side facing him as I anticipated what to say. Where do I even begin?
"Okay, I'm just going to cut the chase and tell you why I am here. I want answers Caleb."
"Ask the questions then R. " When he called me that, all the memories came flooding back to my head. All the time we spent together, the fun we had and my other things that we did together.
"Why?" That's what I could mange to ask. All the years of trusting him and he just walked out and left. I couldn't think of a better question than that. Why would be do that to me?
"Let's not be vague with the questions please. But I'll still answer your first one."
I didn't know if I was ready to hear the answer yet.
"I know you're probably going to hate me for this but I owe you the truth. " I braced myself for the hit.
"Back at the base, All my mates used to tell me was that I was not good enough for you. That I was only spoiling you and destroying your future. I didn't mind because it was not what you thought. You had so high thoughts of me and I couldn't love you more. Then I started getting threats from my friends to break up with you or die, I always thought they were joking. One day your parents came to me at the base and threatened to have me sacked or deployed to Somali where I'd probably die in battle if I didn't stay away from you."
" I still don't understand. How does the sex part comes in?" I was now angry as I balled and flattened my fists.
" Be patient I'm getting there." He smiled. I didn't know what he found funny at that moment because my mind was in a scrambled mess.
" When your parents approached me with that threat, I was still adamant to let go. I loved you."
"Loved? " I felt the blow.
"Let me finish will you. When I was still adamant your parents offered to pay me five hundred grand for the break up and I couldn't say no. My mom was in the hospital and I needed the money so badly for her surgery and a kidney transplant so the offer was too good to let go. Call me whatever you like but I would do it again if it meant getting my mother the treatment she needed to get better and heal. And on the sex part, I just needed a reason to break up with you. I knew if I asked you to have sex with me, you would refuse, making it a more suitable reason for a break up. I'm sorry for breaking your heart and leaving you without an explanation."
"You could have told me about this Cal , I would have given you the money you needed. You know I would."
"What about my life? I needed to lay low a little bit before I became dead meat." He reasoned with me.
" I deserved to know all this a little sooner don't you think? Would you even have told me?"
" I wanted to. Trust me I did. But your parents kept tabs on me I didn't want to lose my job, or die. I knew how rich people worked. Then I tried to get over you but when I saw you on that door yesterday, all those pent up feelings just rushed back like a whirlwind."
"What are you saying Caleb?" I just needed to hear him say the words.
"I still love you R. I don't know what we're going to do about your parents, but I wanna get back together with you if you're up for it. But if you've moved it's cool also, no one to blame really, I did this to myself. You and my cousin Nate looked pretty close yesterday, he's a nice guy."
"Are you kidding me, I would love to get back together with you." This is what I had longed for. Even in my dreams. But why was my heart feeling a little heavy?
"Really? What about Nate, aren't you two...
" No no Nate and I are just good friends that's all. So how's your mother? "
"She didn't make it through the transplant. She passed away during the procedure. Sometimes I wish I never took that cursed money, maybe she would have lived a little longer." He had a regretful look on his face and I patted his shoulder in comfort.
" I'm so sorry to hear that. But you shouldn't blame yourself for that. You did what you thought was best for her, I'm pretty sure I would have done the same thing."
"Still, I could have done better."
"You know, all those years I imagined telling you everything and you just chasing me away like a stray dog. I know that was a dick move to make but I was desperate."
"Its okay Caleb, I forgive you. Let's start over."
"I'd love to."
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