Feelings

By sugatrapnaee_

549K 19.6K 15.5K

Kimani Goode, 24, lives in the projects of Compton, California with her cheating/abusive boyfriend Shia. She'... More

The Difference |1|
Calming Moments |2|
Pool Party |3|
My Morning Sickness |4|
Meeting Them More |5|
Im Giving Up |6|
Sticking Up for His |7|
Boop Boop Boop |9|
My Break |10|
Old Roots |11|
Lé Date | Chapter 12
Green Eyes | Chapter 13
Close Friends |14|
Red Lights |15|
Dont Know Why I Came |16|
Going Through It |17|
Open Df Up |18|
Taking Off |19|
Tension |20|
Its Yo F*ckin Birthday |21|
Really Keisha? |22|
He Dead, Dead as Hell |23|
New Friend |24|
I Peep That |25|
Im Leaving |26|
Pull Up |27|
Back To It |28|
Makin Money Moves |29|
Shopping Prep |30|
Surprise B*tch! |31|
Finding it Out |32|
Home Sweet Home |33|
Put Yo Fucking Clothes Back On |34|
Viva Las Vegas |35|
The Truth Can Be Too Much To Handle|36|
Flash Back Of Truth |37|
His Funeral |38|
Buying Tickets |39|
Baton Rouge |40|
No No No |41|
Risky Procedure |42|
Pop Off Bitch |43|
Fuck 12 |44|
Settling This Out |45|
Incoming Evidence |46|
Im backkk!!!
The Great Passing |47|
Grand Funeral |48|
To Be Lucky |49|
Pick Some Names Pleaseee
It was you |50|
Troublesome |51|
Empathy Dreams |52|
This Bitch Needa Get Handled | Chapter 53
Taking Action - Chapter 54
Holding back |55|
1 Month Closer |56|
Unexpected arrival |57|
Hectic First Day Home |58|
Same Idea, Best Ending |59|
Good Days |1|
My Type |2|
In the darkness |3|
Thinkin Bout You |4|
My new coverrr
Drama |5|
White Tee |6|
I Wanna Know | 7 |
Potential |8|
Suspecting |9|
When The Party's Over |10|
Playing Games |11|
Something Special |12|
Lovely |13|
Session 32 |14|
Everything I Wanted |15|
Spotless Mind |16|
Dear Mama |17|
Body Party |18|
Do Better |19|
Birthday B*tch |20|
Tombstones |21|
Loyal |22|
Say Something |23|
Keep your head up |23|
Three's a Crowd | 24
Agreements |25|
What The F#ck?! |26|
One Thing After The Next |27|
My Little Love |28|
Putting 2&2 Together | 29

Against My Will |8|

10.7K 403 219
By sugatrapnaee_

The Next Morning..
9:16am
Kimani POV

I stretched and yawned as I woke up, I removed the covers off of me and went in the bathroom.

The burning sensation in my pee made me remember that I gotta go back home and take those pills.

I wiped and then I took some mouth wash and swished It in my mouth since I didn't have a toothbrush here and I washed my hands the flushed the toilet before I left.

As I was going downstairs I smelled food being cooked and I walked into the kitchen and saw Jacy cooking something.

"Good morning, I thought you would've slept for longer or I would've hurried up and cook" he said.

"It's fine, I can help you if you want?" I asked him.

"Nah I'm cooking breakfast for you so just sit down and wait" he replied taking eggs out the carton it was in.

I sat on the stool behind the island and watched as he cooked. "What you even making?" I asked.

"French toast, eggs with bacon" he said cracking the egg into the bowl.

A hour in a half later

He placed the plate in front of me and a cup of orange juice and then he sat next to me with his plate.

I put syrup on it and took a bite and it was actually good. "Mmm, this is actually good" I moaned.

"What? You thought it was gone taste bad or something?" He frowned smiling.

"Uh- nooo" I said then laughed.

"Mhm, what you doing today?" He asked.

"Nothing at all, just gonna go home" I sighed out.

"If anything happens when you get there, I want you to text or call me Ight? I'll speed down there and get you if I have to" he answered taking a bite of eggs.

I nodded my head, I wish I can live here with him cause I was scared to go home.

"I hope that nod was a yes you will and not a I'm hearin you but I'm not gone do it" he replied.

"I will jacy" I spoke up.

He nodded his head and we ate breakfast while we talked and that's when his phone started to ring.

The name on the phone was Baby Moms 🙄. He rolled his eyes and answered the phone.

"Hello?......Gio what the hell you doin on yo momma phone......she what?!........where you at?........Ight ima connect the location to that phone and ima be over there to pick you up....Ight son Love you to" he spoke then hung up the phone.

"What happened?" I asked him as he stood up from the stool.

"My baby moms on some nut shit leaving him in the car while she fucking some nigga" he said as I followed him out the living room.

"I'll drop you home after I get him so you coming with me" he said.

"Okay" I replied.

In The Car- 28 minutes later

He turned the street and we was in the projects that I lived in and I raised my eyebrow.. was he dropping me off first orr?.

"There go her fucking car too" he spoke parking up behind it.

"Stay in the car real quick" he told me.

"Jacy... I live here" I told him.

He tilted his head and we both got out the car. When he went up to her car he opened it cause it was unlocked.

"Gio come on" he told him as he reached in and got him.

"Finally, it was cold in here" he shivered.

"Mani can you take him to the car for me please? Then come back" he told me.

I nodded my head and the little boy grabbed my hand and I took him to the car and it the back seat and shut the door and went back to Jacy.

"Which door is it?" He asked.

"Door A" I replied.

He nodded his head and he went up there as I followed him and I unlocked the door with my keys and Shia was really fucking this girl on our couch.

"Come on man keisha, you gotta do better than that girl. Leaving our son in the freezing car? And nigga you ain't no good either for fuckin on my baby moms while with this fine ass female in front of me. I gotta go man. Kimani I'll hit you up later" Jacy said as he left shaking his head.

The girl gathered her things and ran out pushing passed me calling jacy's name.

I closed the door behind me and locked it and Shia was staring at me hard while putting his pants back on. I ignored him and just went upstairs to take these damn pills.

After I took them I was going to go take a shower but then Shia busted in the room and pushed me to the wall and hurt my back.

"FUCK YOU THINK YOU DOING COMING UP IN HERE WITH THAT NIGGA?! YOU GOT A DEATH WISH KIMANI? HUH?" He yelled getting in my face.

"no shia i just-

"SHUT THE FUCK UP BITCH, YOU FUCKED THAT NIGGA HUH? YOU POPPIN THE SHIT THATS IN BETWEEN YO LEGS?" He yelled.

I shook my head nervously until he went in the dresser and pulled out a gun and pointed it at me,taking it off safety.

My heart dropped to my ass. "Shia, please put that gun down.." I shuddered.

"I told yo ass, if I can't have you. Then nobody can, you thought I was playing?" He said getting closer.

"Okay wait no, please.. I won't- I won't talk to him ever again just please shia put it down" I said on the verge of crying.

"Yea you won't ever talk to him again, matter fact you won't be talking to no nigga. You finna lay on that damn bed and give me a child." He yelled.

"Shia please no, you know I don't want kids" I said with tears coming out my eyes.

"I don't give a FUCK what you want, you either die or ima fuck the shit outta you and put a baby in you" he said putting the gun on my neck.

I sobbed. "F-fine" I gave in crying.

He put the gun down and grabbed me by my neck and threw me on the bed. He started ripping the clothes off of me and I cried and cried.

2 hours later

I laid on the bed and stared at the wall from what just happened.

"And if you abort my kid I'm gone put 10 holes in your body" he said in my ear.

I heard him get off the bed and then leave the room and I started to pour down and cry.

I had no choice but to have his baby and I was scared and worried. I didn't want a kid by him, I was scared that he will abuse them too.

I wanted to text Jacy, I really did but I was scared. Shia really pulled a gun on me and it shook my core to the fullest. I'm actually terrified of him now.

After a long while of crying I got up and took the pills then I went in the bathroom to go take a shower.

An hour later

Shia left out and I was still in bed just in shock meanwhile Jacy was blowing my phone up with text messages and calls and I ignored them all cause I wanted to be left alone right now.

I didn't even know what to do, I was lost and clueless. My mind went off to the first time shia and I met and I stared crying

Flash Back...

I was sitting in class doing my school work and these boys beside me kept picking with me and throwing paper balls at me.

I let out a sigh and continued to do my work, this was a everyday thing with people picking on me and calling me a orphan since I stayed in a foster home.

"Aye y'all leave her alone damn, y'all niggas got nothing better to do?" This one light skin boy said standing up for me.

They stopped and he sat in the desk beside me and smiled. "Wassup, I'm Shia" he spoke.

I smiled back. "Hi, I'm Kimani... thanks for doing that by the way" I said.

"It's no problem, how old are you?" He asked.

"14 how about you?" I asked.

"15.. your pretty ass Jawn" he smirked.

I blushed. "Thank you." I replied.

"Can I get your number or something? Maybe we can hang out one day" he smiled taking his phone out.

"Oh um I don't have a phone right now but we can meet up today after school? The park is where I'm normally at, just drawing" I spoke.

"Yea, Ight I'll see you there Kimani" he smiled.

We talked for the whole bell even though we weren't supposed to and I found him really attractive and cute. Maybe this'll lead onto something.

Flashback over.

He was so nice and treated me with respect. I don't know what the fuck happened in his brain to just go and cheat. It didn't add up at all.

6:15pm

"Get the fuck out the bed and go make me some dinner. I'm hungry" Shia said ripping the covers off of me.

"Why don't you just order something" I replied grabbing my sheet back but he pulled it back.

"Bitch because I ask you to make something up for me" he said.

I rolled my eyes and stayed in bed. "You ignoring me now?" He said loud.

He snatched me up by my hair and got close to me. "I'm not going to repeat myself mani, go downstairs and make me something to eat" he said through gritted teeth.

He let me go and pushed me in the process while I went downstairs and just cooked him some fucking ramen noodles.

After it was done I called him down and he looked at the bowl with disgust. "Fuck is this mani?" He asked.

"You asked me to cook you food right? There it is" I said putting the pot in the sink.

"You trynna get smart?" He said coming up behind me.

"No I'm not Shia, I'm just tired and wanna go to sleep" I said washing the pot out.

He stayed silent then grabbed my ass. "You see all this? It's fucking mine. No other nigga can have this but me so get that through yo fucking skull" he said on my neck.

I hissed in pain cause he was grabbing it to hard. "move" I said softly pushing him off.

He smacked my ass hard as fuck. "Don't be fucking pushing me. Now make me some actual fucking food bitch" he said then left the kitchen throwing the bowl of noodles in the process.

I sighed and shook my head.

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