"Come on, hit me again," Carl commanded, looking at the girl before him as she shook her head. "Carl—" the boy raised his eyebrow. "What, you scared?" Clary let a smirk grow on her face, shaking her head before she brought her sword and swung it at him. He counteracted with his own, defensively hitting her blade away before preparing himself to strike at her. Analyzing him quickly, Clary realized that he was heavier on his feet compared to her due to his taller frame. Using that to her advantage, she was able to dodge the large swing of his sword before going low and sweeping his legs out from under him.
As Carl fell to the floor, she was satisfied as he let out a grunt before she used him being stunned to straddle him. On the higher ground, her blade immediately pressed against his throat while she placed a grip on his hand that held her blade. He tried to fight against her hold, believing it should have been easy considering her much shorter frame. However, that proved false as she didn't falter, her grip on his staying strong and solid. Begrudgingly, Carl let out a sigh before looking up to her. "You're kind of on my hand so I can't tap out." Clary smiled proudly. "So..." the boy groaned playfully. "Yes, Clarissa Dean, you win." The girl laughed before standing, holding out her hand and helping him up. "I gotta admit, you're not too bad, Grimes. You're actually doing pretty good." Carl rolled his eyes, letting out a sharp exhale. "You don't have to lie, you took me down. I doubt that's good." Clary threw a water bottle towards him, drinking from her own before she spoke. "Well one, this is only your third training session. And two, you have to remember I was able to take down men twice my size. There's a reason I got my ranks so young." Seeing her smirk, Carl nodded extravagantly. "Right, forgive me Commander." As he made a motion to bow, the boy laughed as Clary pushed him playfully.
A smile was on both of their faces until they heard footsteps approach. However, Clary's smile didn't waver as Glenn's figure moved closer, looking at the two before speaking. "So, is Carl a better fighter than you or—" Clary let out a scoff. "He wishes. To reach my level, that would take years." Carl rolled his eyes, giving her a playful flare before she shrugged. "But he's getting better. He'll be a damn good fighter in no time." Glenn nodded his head before looking to Carl as the boy approached the two. "Your dad wanted to talk to you. He also said you need to take care of Judith." Carl nodded, grabbing his stuff before turning to the two, focusing more on Clary. "You coming over tonight?" Carl asked, surprising Glenn as he saw Clary smile softly. However, before she could respond, Carl's eyes flickered over to Glenn. "You know, if that's okay with you and Maggie." Clary looked between both Carl and Glenn, surprised that the teenager was asking for permission. She was even more surprised as Glenn looked cautious. "You doing another training session?" Glenn asked, to which Carl shook his head. "I just thought she could meet Judith, maybe be normal and pick up a comic or two—" Clary hit on the arm. "Hey!" Glenn couldn't help but smile as he saw the two of them laugh before he nodded. "Of course," Glenn agreed, watching as the boy nodded before departing with quick goodbyes. Glenn noticed Clary watching as he went, a soft smile on her face that told him everything he needed to know.
As Clary turned towards the man, she was surprised to see a grin creeping onto his face. "What?" Clary questioned, to which Glenn only shook his head. "Spending a lot of time with Carl. Should I be worried?" Raising an eyebrow, Clary laughed at the mere suggestion his smirk was hinting at. "You're crazy," Clary declared as she realized what he was insinuating, a laugh sounding again as his eyebrow raised. "After what happened on our run, he just wants to be ready in case he ever has to fight. So, I'm teaching him."
During Glenn's time of healing, he had admitted to the girl that Nicholas had lured him into the forest to kill him. With his revelation, she told him about the man that Carl and herself had encountered and how it brought her past back. Glenn only nodded as Clary gathered her stuff, the two beginning to walk home in silence before she spoke. "Is everything okay?" Clary questioned the man, worry gnawing at the pit of her stomach only to be quelled by Glenn's nod. "Yeah, everything's good. I just wanted to remind you that the dry run is tomorrow and, as much as I want to have you helping me out—" Clary nodded begrudgingly. "You want me here, I know." She looked up to him with an unsure look. "But maybe going with Nicholas isn't the best idea, what if—" Glenn stopped, cutting off the girl as he faced her. His face was stern but she saw his eyes soften. "I can handle Nicholas, but I want to know that you're safe here. And to help out Maggie if she needs anything. Can you do that?" With a nod of assurance from the girl, the two continued walking towards their home.
•••
As night blanketed Alexandria in darkness, very few figures could be seen in soft glow of porch lights and lanterns. One of them was Clary as she walked through the barren roads, making her way towards Carl's home after checking up on Enid to see how she was doing. She knew Enid hadn't been necessarily close to Pete, having learned of his abusive tendencies towards the boys and Jessie, but his death had still shaken her. Even worse was Ron becoming distant, which had terrified her friend. Clary had been unable to do much, leaving her to sleep as she knew Enid well enough to know that, when she needed to think, she would rather be alone.
However, as Clary's boots scraped against the asphalt with her slow steps, her thoughts bled away as as saw a figure making its way from the main gate. As it approached, Clary realized it was Deanna, the woman still in the trancelike state she had been when losing her husband. "Deanna?" Clary questioned, approaching the woman who continued to walk. She slowed down slightly, seeing the woman paid no mind to her. "Hey, Deanna, are you o—" as Clary reached out to touch her shoulder, the woman spun around. Clary was surprised when the woman grabbed tightly onto her arm, the grip almost bruising. "You said we would need you to survive. We do. But why didn't my husband get that chance to live? Why?"
Clary had known the stench of alcohol from a young age that it didn't even take a second to recognize its familiar scent coating the woman's breath. The teenager could only shake her head softly, glancing to the bruising grip still tight upon her arm. "We don't get to control who lives and who dies. What happened to Reg was a terrible accident, and Pete didn't get away with it. It wasn't fair, but we just have to continue on." The woman's eyes met hers and they were bloodshot, almost scaring Clary as she wanted to step back but couldn't. "How do you do it? Lose your people, family, childhood... all of it. How do you just lose it and just 'continue on'?" Clary clenched her jaw, knowing she had no real answer, but she could see the desperation in the woman's eyes. She needed an answer, so Clary gave her the only one she could. "I— I don't think I am," Clary admitted to the woman, surprise appearing in Deanna's eyes before she continued. "But I try to go on, for them. For those I lost. I try to survive to tomorrow because they didn't get the chance to."
It was with those words that the woman nodded softly before letting go, realizing how tight the grip had been. Surprisingly, she patted the spot, almost as if in apology. Clary's eyes softened as she saw what the woman had endured had broken her, realizing she wasn't just the strong woman she had perceived her to be, rather just human. "I'm sorry about Reg. I— I can't even imagine how that feels like," Clary admitted, having never felt the strength of the bond she knew the two shared.
Reg had been the builder of hope and creator to everything Alexandria had housed while Deanna was the leader. She recognized how much a leader needed hope, and it was as if Deanna had lost hers. "He was the love of my life," Deanna said softly, her sad gaze falling upon the girl. "You were right when you said I was scared of you. Not because of what you could take from me, but because of how much you remind me of myself." Clary was surprised at those words, staying silent as the woman held her arms. "You are a leader, Clarissa, and I can't deny that. You are ambitious and you are cunning and you are strong. But you won't live until you find your hope. I wouldn't have if I didn't find Reg. And one day, just as I did, you'll find this person that doesn't complete you, no... they'll show you how to be complete yourself. They will make you feel whole because they'll show you that you weren't missing any pieces, you just couldn't find them within you." Clary was surprised to hear a laugh from the woman. "You are sharp and you are cold as ice because that is who you have to be. But they will be kind and hopeful and full of light. And when you find them, that person you'd do anything for— be anything for? You hold onto them. You protect them. You love them. Don't lose them. They may be the one good thing you'll have left in this world." Clary didn't get to say anything as the woman departed, leaving the teenager behind with her mind full of questions.
Clary remained in the middle of the road until the woman was long gone, trying to grasp onto the ramblings of either a wise or drunk woman, she didn't know. She pushed aside the thought as she continued towards Carl's home, knocking upon the door. It took a few moments before it opened to reveal Carol, the smile upon the woman's face widening. "Clary, it's good to see you, Carl said there was a chance you'd stop by. He's upstairs with Judith." Clary nodded, Carol welcoming her in before the girl made her way upstairs.
Clary was able to find the room considering it was right where hers was just on the opposite side. She saw the door open a crack, the girl pushing the door open to see Carl bouncing Judith as he walked. Hearing his door open, Carl turned towards it to see the girl walk in, a smile emerging on his face. "Hey, I didn't think you'd actually come." Clary only shrugged, a ghost of a smile on her face. "Well, I admit I mostly came for Judith. Who I'm guessing—" she pointed to the young child in his arms and he nodded. Clary moved closer, the little girl's eyes landing on her before she smiled. Seeing the exchange, Carl looked to the teenage girl. "You wanna hold her?" Clary's eyes widened at the suggestion. "Oh, I— I don't know—" Carl raised an eyebrow, wondering if she didn't, but he saw her eyes give away that she already adored the young girl. "Come on, you'll be fine." Clary didn't want to admit to him that the last child she had held had been her niece, Layla. Her sister and Leon had taken in the child after her parents had died, quickly seeing the two as her parents as she was too young to see any different. Clary didn't want to imagine what had happened to the young girl, the thought placing a deep hurt in her chest.
Nonetheless, Clary held open her arms before Carl place the child in them. The little girl smiled, clasping her hands around the braid Clary wore to keep her long fair out of her face. The child then moved her hands to cradle Clary's face, her pale skin contrasting from Clary's deeper tones. Clary couldn't help but smile as the child gurgled, laughing. "She's beautiful." Carl nodded softly. "Yeah she— she is." Carl didn't admit that when he heard beautiful, he wanted to say that watching Clary with his sister, the kindness in her gaze, was beautiful. His head battled with his heart, knowing he shouldn't be seeing her in such a way when previously they hadn't even been friends. To push down the rising infatuation, he took a step away. "Are you going on the dry run tomorrow?" Carl questioned, surprised as the girl shook his head. "No, Glenn wants me to stay here to keep watch over everything and, he won't admit it, but to watch over Maggie too," Clary said, shrugging. "I'm okay with it though, we need to make sure everything is in order here anyways." Carl nodded and the two sat in silence, which broke as Judith's laughed filled the air, causing the two teens to smile.
Carl got up, moving to the side of his bed before grabbing the sheathed sword Clary had let him borrow, holding it out to her. "I wanted to thank you, for training me. I'm good enough to take down walkers but I know that people are more dangerous, and you're getting me ready for that. So thank you." As he tried to give it back, Clary smiled before shaking his head, pushing the sword back to him. "That sword only collects dust, I've got mine." Seeing the confusion upon the boy's face, Clary laughed softly. "I want you to have it, make sure you can protect yourself when I'm not around to save your ass." Carl's eyes widened as he looked at her hand on the sword, which she let go of. He looked at it in a new light as she spoke again. "It's a true warriors weapon," she declared, the boy noticing the softening eyes she held as she looked at the weapon. "It belonged to Millie, it was her backup when she couldn't use her bow. She'd want it put to good use." Carl looked back at the girl, unsure if he should take the weapon. Clary had opened up to him more about her past, Millie being mentioned a few times. He knew they had been... close, maybe closer than she let on. "Are you sure? You don't—" Clary waved off his concern. "I'm sure. And it's a two part gift, so..." Clary pulled something brown from her pocket and placed it in his hand.
Carl was surprised as he looked at it, placing the blade on his bed before examining the cuff. He was surprised to see an embossed sun in the leather, and S under it. Looking inside, he was surprised to see a pocket, a small blade hidden within. "There, now you also have a cuff with a hidden knife. It's how I got out from the ropes when we got nabbed." Clary beckoned Carl to her, taking the cuff from his hand and tying it around his wrist tight enough to stay on yet loose enough to grab the small blade in the pocket in the cuff. "Thank you, Clary this— this means a lot." Clary only smiled, meeting the boys blue gaze before nodding softly. "I think you deserved a little something, especially putting up with me not being the nicest person to you." The two smiled to each other in a deeper understanding before playing with the young girl that Clary swears was the reason she came.