Sorry for being inactive, with everything going on in the world right now it is important to take a step back and learn about new things and educate ourselves, sign petitions, donate and spread awareness. Together we can change the world. #BlackLivesMatter Enjoy x
I am left with the expression plastered across my face as I did a when Hugo walked away from me just moments ago. I understand that Hugo is mad and angry at Jay for the things he said, but I am left lost and confused as to why he needed to leave me. Hugo has always been conflicted by his mind, from the brief things he told me about when he lived in LA, I understood that pushing people away and blocking his emotions out was his coping mechanism. I was stupid to believe that I had changed him. With my face still holding the same expression, Naya notices me. "Mae? are you okay Hugo just slammed the door. I mean I get him and Jay are arguing but why haven't they hugged it out yet it isn't like them." She rambles. "But don't you worry I sure shut Jay up and he will definitely apologise, did Hugo agree to say sorry too?" She continues to ramble. After a few moments of silence Naya notices that her question hasn't been answered, or in fact no response has left my mouth for the entirety of her little speech. She waves her hands Infront of my face rather obnoxiously until I finally break my thoughts. "Hugo broke up with me." The words fall out of my mouth heavily without me blinking and before I had a chance to think.
After a few 'what!' and 'why?' questions from Naya and no logical answer from me, my mood goes from sad and shocked to angry. Why would Hugo do this to me, promising he would never hurt me or push me away from him, all he has done tonight is hurt me and push himself away. I understand that he hated how he reacted but if I wouldn't have stepped in between him and Jay then someone was going to get hurt, evidently, I didn't think it would be me.
After hopelessly watching the waves crash each other, much like my life was, for almost an hour, I decide to Hugo. He was easy to find even on this big boat; I went straight to the back of the boat where hours prior he was showing how much he loved me through his softly spoken words of affection and gentle touches. He is sat with his face in his hands and his body facing out onto the waves, as I was moments ago. "Hugo?" I almost ask hopelessly, I get flash backs from earlier as his name falls from my lips. His head doesn't move to look at me, the palms of his hands are still sharply pressed onto his face. Unsure of what to do I react to his non reaction and move closer to him. I sit next to him and place my hand on his back. Once I begin to hear the faint sobs that leave his mouth, I move my hand in circular motions to comfort him. From the contact my hand is making with Hugo's muscly back I momentarily forget that we are no longer together. I will always love Hugo whether that be separately or in union, he is always mine.