You woke up on top of 2D's bed. You gasp, quickly sitting up and frantically checking your surroundings. Did you and 2D fuck? Cuz that would be the worst. You are asexual, after all.
Eventually your eyes landed on 2D; who was asleep on the ground on top of a bunch of blankets. You sigh in relief. You didn't fuck. Thank God.
You stare at him for a good thirty seconds or so. Who could blame you? He just looked so cute snuggling with his teddy. It was just the wholsomest sight. Not sure if 'wholsomest' Is an actual word but, you know what I mean.
You smile as you carefully proceeded to slide off the man's bed and you walk towards your bag, which was across the room for some reason. You didn't remember it being all the way over there, but you didn't want to think about it right now. You just wanted painkillers. Your "headache" was killing you.
Eventually, you made it to your bag, and proceeded to shuffle through it, looking for your bottle of "bad habits" that you apparently refused live without because well, reasons. Wait... where were they? Dammit! Why the hell couldn't you find them? They couldn't have just grown legs and run away. That's simply absurd! You groan in agony. Where could they have gone?
You sigh, rubbing your frontal lobe in an exasperation when suddenly, you heard a clicking noise, as if somebody had shut a door or something. It certainly was suspicious. Perhaps some ASS had decided to steal your pain-away capsules. You twist your head behind you. 2d was gone. You don't know how he did it... but he was the one that'd stolen your pills. You were sure of it.
You growl in frustration as you slam the door open, and proceeded to stomp down the stairs, each stomp rumbling throughout the entire studio, menacingly. "STUART BLOODY POT, I SWEAR IF YOU HAVE MY DAMN PAINKILLERS, I WILL THROW YOU DOWN A WELL!" You shout, upon reaching the bottom of the steps.
"D, I thought you said she got you new ones? You can't just go stealing crap like that!" Russel scolds.
Your eyes dart towards your left. You saw Russel and 2D standing together. Russel obviously looked tired; slouched in stance, cup of coffee, and sporting some striped blue pajamas with cute white bunny slippers.
2D, on the other hand, he looked panicked. He appeared to be sweating, his hands tucked behind his back as if he were hiding something from you. You just knew those were your painkillers.
You let out a very drawn out sigh of exasperation, and you proceeded to stamp towards the two, stopping in front of the azure haired medication theif known as Stuart Pot. You simply glare at him, your hand outstretched in front of you, angrily waiting for the blunette to return what's yours.
Noodle runs behind 2D and stands proudly behind him, a small "2D" escaping her lips. 2D glances at the small Japanese teen behind him. "You have legs, yes?"
2D shot her a look of concern and he nods softly. "Yeh..."
"Well... NIGERUNDAYO, 2D! NIGERUNDAYOOOOOOO!"
You begin grinding your teeth in unmitigated frustration. "Just give me the damn pills." You rumble as 2D frantically proceeds to place them in between your palms.
Like the prescription drug abusing psycho you are, you wasted no time at all to pry open those pills, your speed and precision alone rivaling that of Star Platinum. It was quite the golden experience watching you skillfully open the bottle and pop about seven pills in your mouth and swallow them with not even a drop of water to help push them down your throat at all. Though this was an amazing sight to see, it was also quite concerning, leaving everybody around you wondering if you were ok, which clearly you weren't. You need help.
"Thank you. Now was that so hard?" You said with the smallest inkling of sarcasm lacing your voice. No response. Just stares of concern. "Okay I'll take that as a no." You turn and proceeded towards the sofa. "I'm gonna sit on this fuckin' couch." You sat down on the fuckin' couch. Comfy.
"2D." Russel says softly, yet firmly as well. 2D looks at Russel in response. "Apologize."
"But Russ, I-" 2D protests before being interrupted by Murdoc shouting a Sex Pistols song... well singing... very loudly perhaps. But certainly not well, no no. His singing was shit and it might stay that way for a bit.
"I AM AN ANTI-CHRIST!" He screams, making everybody flinch. "I AM AN ANARCHIST!!" Oh god. Make it stop.
"Not again, you crackerass." Russel grumbles while softly pushing the green man and sighing.
"Agh!" Murdoc presses his palms to his ears. "TOO LOUD, RUSS! I'M BLOODY HUNGOVER! SHOW SOME CONSIDERATION FOR ONCE! Jeez." He then proceeded to continue singing the song... very, very, badly.
You heard the shouting grow closer, and louder. He was going to sit on the couch. Oh god. The man flops down on said couch you happened to be sitting at and hung his head down, and he proceeds to rub his forehead, still singing, of course.
You scooch away as far as you could from the screaming pickle. Listening to his shrill shouting so unbelievably close to you felt like throwing up razors but for your ears. Murdoc suddenly stopped screaming, and looked at you in discomfort. "Where did you sleep?" He squeaks.
"I-in uh... in 2D's room, uh s-sir." You mumble, almost falling of the couch because, well, you know why.
"Mm." He continues to straddle his head in his arms. "Wait... DID YOU FUCK?" He shouts suddenly, making you fall off the couch.
"NO! Jeez. Ow."
Murdoc stares at you as you proceed to stand back up, rubbing your head all the while. "Oh." He massages his head some more. "That's bullshit but I'll believe it."
"It's not bullshi一" Murdoc intterupts.
"Ok how about we assign you to a room so you can shut up."
You glare at him a bit for, you know, interrupting. "Fine." You grumble.
"Good, good, good." He whispers.
You felt something poke you in the back so you twist around and what do you know! It's Noodle! "Y/N! Wanna hear a secret?" She whispers, clearly making Murdoc perk up and murmur something to himself. I don't know what he said, stop asking. "Murdoc kissed一" She suddenly fell over. That was interesting.
'I wonder who he kissed.' You thought.
Ok, SIS! Feel represented NOW? Asexual clump of... stuff? I guess? Shit I dunno.
Lmao, ok. Uhm... there was a lot of JoJo references in this, oops. My bad. I promise I'll tone them down a bit in the next installment of this stripshow of a book. (Unless you don't want me to. I don't mind 😳) Also before my sister 'Highway Star-s' her way out of wherever she is right now to my room to take my nutrients, no, Murdoc did not kiss 2D. So quit yer whining. But I will not tell you who he kissed until the end of this book. But I will give you a hint: it's a man 😳😳👀
Kay this note is getting long so I'll leave to make that Kira book I've been thinking about doing for so long. (Wow. I like JoJo now. I'm soooo random! Fuck you) Aight, goodbye.
I need help.