~Nico~
"Hm, not bad. Not bad at all," The fake me says, his voice begrudging approval.
I stare blankly at the corpse at my feet. Crimson blood creates a halo around the body, seeping slowly into the soil. Alex's blond hair is touseled and out of place, his blue eyes unseeing. I wonder what number this one is? Number 200? 300? I've lost count a long time ago. But it's not like any of that matters. It's just a meat suit in the shape of Alex.
"Good, but one more time," It says silkily in my ear. His hands grab my shoulders as he sticks to my back. His voice is a low purr. "It wasn't quite what I was looking for. You understand, don't you?"
I nod my head without a word. Who cares anymore? I just need to finish the trials. I've already died countless times and killed more than that. Death has no meaning here, so any fear or repulsion that I first held has faded along with the innocence that I've also killed off numerous times.
It smiles and pats my head mockingly. "You're such a good pet, Nico. Just a little more shaping and you'll be just right."
Everything goes dark. First comes the smell. I smell hundreds of bodies packed into a small area before I feel myself being tossed around. The voices come next, a steady hum of chattering. Finally, I see that I'm standing in the middle of a crowd. Looking around, it seems that I'm at the Pack grounds; not an unfamiliar sight during all of these trials. I'm surrounded by fellow wolves who are watching something on the stage. I glance up to see it's Alex with his father. Both are giving a speech about something dull and unimportant that doesn't reach my ears that are ringing with three simple words: Kill them all.
And that's when the show starts. I start by slitting the person's throat next to me before I move onto the next person. Without even blinking five people are dead. The crowd turns rowdy with panic as screams and shouts break out amongst them. I don't even bother looking to the stage to see Alex's look of horror and disgust. I snap a neck with my hands and set flame to a dozen other people. Fangs tear my flesh apart but I barely register the pain as I keep moving. Blood coats everything in a spray of crimson. In an instant, the entire Pack is taken out except for Alex and I.
"Nico, why?" Alex growls, his eyes glowing gold and fangs bared. He can barely contain his anger.
I don't bother answering as I mutter a spell under my breath. I break through Alex's defense before he can even change into a wolf and place my hand over his heart. It ceases beating the moment I touch it. I watch without a single drop of sympathy or regret as Alex's eyes lose the shine of life. I look down at myself. I'm bleeding from various bites. Flesh has been ripped off in some places. And I have a knife in my spleen. I topple over and die beside Alex.
"Ahahaha, that was much better. You're still lacking in some parts, though," It says, placing a hand on my shoulder.
I glare at him. What more does he want from me? I've done it hundreds of times already. Just what am I missing?
"You want to know what you're missing, don't you?" It questions with a smirk on his lips. His blue eyes have a maniacal spark in them that sends a shiver down my spine.
"..." I remain quiet, gritting my teeth with impatience. I'm so tired. I want to return to the surface so badly. I'd prefer that nightmare to this hell.
It steps toward me. He wraps an arm around my waist and pulls me close, a twisted smile on his face. Slender fingers lift up my chin, forcing me to meet his sadistic gaze. He places a kiss upon my lips. My body stiffens and I cringe at the contact. Its skin is cold and similar to a corpse. The hair on the back of my neck stands on edge with disgust, but I'm unable to pull away from him.
It laughs, a low chuckle in his throat. "What's wrong? I thought you liked doing dirty things, Nico. After all, you're willing to do it with anyone, isn't that right? Here, I'll give you a hint on how to get out of here if you beg me for more"
My cheeks flame with embarrassment. This bastard... I'll never give in to his stupid demands. I would rather die another thousand deaths.
It licks and bites on my neck. "I could make that happen, you know? Are you sure that you should be wasting your time down here? Time is still passing, you know? With every wasted second Nyx is getting closer and closer to her goal. She's going to win while you waste your time in this trap that you volunteered yourself for. What's more important, Nico: your pride or being the hero?"
"Why should I trust you? You're the one standing in my way. I can't believe a single word that you've said," I hiss vehemently.
It laughs a deep laugh that seems to cause everything around us to shake and tremble. My heart drums with fear as I peer into his malicious eyes. "I'm the final boss, Nico. I'm the game master. Whatever happens here is under my control. That's why you should do whatever I say. You want to get out of here, right? Or do you want to prove that Nyx was right in assuming that you would never make it out of this pit?"
My hands curl into fists at my side. Why do I have to go through this? Why couldn't my trial be something simple and easy like petting kittens or believing in flying with pixie dust? I fix It with a glare. "What do you want me to do?" I spit.
Its hands travel down my spine and land on my hips. "Beg me for more and I'll tell you more information about this place," He slips a hand under my shirt, "maybe I'll even reveal the secret on how to get out of here."
"Give..."
"Hm, what was that? I couldn't quite hear you," It says in my ear.
Just like the mirror I punched so long ago, I feel as if I'm breaking into a thousand pieces. Each task he has me do causes me to fragment more and more. I watch myself from above like a ghost as I wrap my arms around his waist. I put my mouth against his ear and whisper, "Please, give me more."
"I knew you would give in," It says, smiling, always smiling. He sets me down on the ground and hovers over me. His hands trail up my chest until they wrap themselves around my throat. "You're always giving in because you're weak," He squeezes until I'm gasping for air. "It's because you're weak that people are always taking advantage of you. It's because you're weak that what you fear the most is yourself. You think I choose this appearance without a reason?"
I can barely hear him over the ringing in my ears. I watch as It, a creature with my face, my hands, my voice, squeezes the life out me with a big grin on his face. My eyes begin to blur with tears and black spots.
"You're your own worst enemy, you know? You only ever hurt yourself. You can stand up for others but never yourself. Every action you take hurts yourself more and more. The only way that you can grow stronger is if you stop fearing yourself and start fighting back." It lifts up one of its hands and presses it against my temple. "In here there is a switch to turn it all off. You can turn off the fear, the doubt, the sadness, the pain. You'll finally be able to defeat Nyx if you do this. So, what do you say?"
My vision has gone completely dark when he finally lifts his other hand. I cough for air, breathing in painfully through my bruised airway. Saliva dribbles down my chin. My chest heaves as I suck in breath after precious breath. It taps my face, bringing me back to consciousness.
"Were you listening?" It inquires.
"A... switch?" I ask hoarsely.
He smiles. "Exactly. A switch that will turn off all the unnecessary emotions that will inevitably bring you down in your battle against Nyx."
"I...I," I cough, trying to speak clearer, "I won't do it."
Its eyes go dark as he glares down at me. "What? Why not? Don't you want to win?"
"But if I don't care about anything, what if I accidentally hurt someone I care about? How will I continue living without feeling anything? The only way that I know that I'm alive is because it hurts. It always hurts."
"I don't think you understand, Nico," It says, leaning in real close, "you're not going to survive your fight with Nyx. You're both going to die. Why do you think she said she'll give Alex back? Because she knows that there's no point in giving you what you ask for when you're going to be dead in the end. So do it, turn off the switch. Otherwise, you're going to be the only one who dies pointlessly without doing a single thing."
My eyes widen. Thoughts whirl through my head at a million miles an hour. I'm going to die in my fight against Nyx? Was there even a point in me living this far then? Shouldn't I have just died earlier?
"It's too late for those thoughts, Nico, right now you can choose your own path by turning off that useless switch in your head. I tried turning it off for you by putting you through those trials, but you're stronger than you think. Every single time, you killed Alex and your friends as gently as possible. Even when I made them say the nastiest things." It places a hand on my cheek, as cold as ice. "You were born too nice and caring in a world that could care less about you."
I stare blankly into his eyes. So, in the end, I was going to die no matter what. That's why the world has been selfishly keeping me alive: so I could die when it tells me to. So I could be some sort of hero. A martyr.
What bullshit.
Rage and grief build up in my chest. Being with Alex was never an option. All the times I foolishly thought that we might have a chance after all of this is over... that slight hope burns to ashes inside of me.
"H-How do you know?" I demand, sitting up. I grab It by the front of his shirt and glare daggers at him.
It laughs. "It's obvious, isn't it? Your body is already in terrible condition. You have no back up to support you and help bring Nyx down. The most logical conclusion is that you're going to have to fight her yourself. You're strong enough to bring her down, but it's guaranteed that you're going to die doing it in your state."
"Then, then I'll just come back later!" I shout, hurting my throat.
"Hahaha, you think she's going to let you go? Or that she'll wait in the same spot for you to come back with more forces? Even if she does, for some strange reason, her goal will already be complete."
"You keep going on and on about her goal, but what is it?"
"Well, she wants to get rid of all werewolves, for one. And two, she wants to storm heaven and kill as many gods as she can with her servants. You and her are a bit alike in that sense: you both want to die."
My heart thuds against my chest. Werewolf genocide? Storm heaven? Is this for real? Nyx is using us for her hate agenda? I'm going to die for a reason as stupid as that? My fingernails dig deeply into the flesh of my palm, drawing blood. I bite my lip until it splits. I want to kill her. I want to kill her so badly it hurts.
"So, what do you say?" It inquires, sitting on his heels, rocking back in forth in his boredom. "Will you turn off the switch or are you going to go back up there and die in vain?"
Blood dribbles down my chin. I wipe it away with the back of my hand, tasting iron on my tongue. It leaves a bitter aftertaste in the back of my throat. Turn off all the emotions I feel? To live my last few moments with only a single objective in mind: kill Nyx and save Alex.
"I'll do it."