Le Final Update - Enjoy Xx
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Seconds, minutes, hours, they all feel the same.
I think my heart might explode from how fast it's beating in my chest. My body wants to make a run for it, either towards Alex for his safety and protection or towards the gun on the floor a few metres away. Let's face it, there's really only one thing I can do: wait for Archer to pull the trigger.
I don't expect anyone to burst out of the trees to save me. I don't expect Alex to miraculously escape all of their bullets to get to me. He and I both know we're stuck.
My hands tremble at my sides and my breathing is erratic. It's so hard not to let my whole body shake and fall to the floor.
I really don't want to die. I really, really don't want to die but in my gut, I know this is the lesser of two evils. We're stuck between a rock and a hard place. Who's to say what Leander will do after this but, as of right now, this is the only option.
Time has slowed to a simple trickle, allowing my nerves to skyrocket.
The nerves in my stomach only get worse as time goes on. It's like that feeling you get when you're blowing up a balloon and you don't know how much more air you can put in it before it pops. I'm just waiting for it to pop.
My senses go on override as my body goes into its fight or flight response - doing what it can to try and keep me alive.
The tears burn my cheeks, working their way down my skin at a painstakingly slow pace. This hurts more than I ever thought it would.
I always thought I'd go peacefully in my sleep one night, never knowing that it happened. It would be painless and peaceful. It wouldn't cause a scene, wouldn't cause unnecessary hurt to those around me, I'd simply drift away and it would all be okay.
I never wanted to die at the hands of someone else but, if it has to be this way, I'm glad it's Archer who's doing this. Not a complete stranger.
"Don't look at me like that." Archer pleads, his eyes looking up towards the sky to avoid facing mine.
I don't say anything. What is there for me to say? I have too much dignity to beg for my life. I won't beg for him to not pull the trigger with pleas that will most likely fall on deaf ears. This was my decision after all.
"Blue, I'm serious." He grounds out. So was I when I said that he has to look me in the eye when he does this. It's his turn to be a man.
He scrunches his eyes shut, the anguish is clear on his face. He doesn't know what to do. "Ugh," he groans, his hand tilting horizontally, "I can't do it." He admits, his arm dropping to his side.
I release a breath but the tears don't stop coming, now out of relief rather than fear. I can feel Alex's relief in the pit of my stomach.
"Fine," Leander speaks up, "Bianca'll do it."
Our eyes both widen and suddenly Archer is grabbing my arm, stealthily shoving his gun in it while twisting me around his back until I've got him in some kind of headlock with the gun pressed against the side of his head. He sends me a 'look' and I nod, playing along with whatever he's planning.
"Don't shoot." Archer shouts, Leander turning back around to see the position Archer has just put us in.
Leander begins to laugh. It's not forced in any way, it's a proper belly laugh as he looks over to us. "Bested by your little sister were you Archie?" He teases.
"Something like that." He holds both his arms in the air as if he's surrendering.
I slowly begin to catch on to what he's doing and take a deep breath. He's too tall for me to hold him in a headlock so I kick him onto his knees, shocking not only him but everyone else watching this go down.
My eyed are instinctively drawn straight to Alex who hasn't torn his gaze away from me. He has a sort of dazed look on his face but that's probably just my mind playing tricks on my in the darkness of the trees.
"Bianca." Leander laughs dismissively.
"Finally." She grins, stepping towards us and pulling her gun out of its holster. I panic, raising the gun up and pulling the trigger.
We all flinch and my ears begin ringing from the deafening noise. All eyes are now on where the bullet landed - mere centimetres in front of her feet. She's stopped, noticing the gun in my hand now aimed at her while my other hand grasps the back of Archer's neck.
"Don't move." I warn but I think my shaking gives away how scared I really feel.
"Okay," she raises both her hands in the air, "no need to go all Charlie's Angels on my ass." What on Earth is she talking about? Who's Charlie?
There's a slow clap from Leander, "Congratulations Blue," the condescension in his voice is obvious, "you shot the floor."
Hey! It's harder than it looks old man!
"You're lucky I didn't shoot you." I fire right back. Not that I have the aim for that, but I could've tried. A girl can dream.
He opens his mouth to reply but he doesn't manage his snide remark when, out of nowhere, three wolves come barrelling out from the undergrowth behind him.
They leap onto the two men either side of him, crashing to the floor with their paws crushing their backs. They pair scream out in pain as the wolves sink their teeth into them, blood splattering up everywhere as they gnaw them to pieces.
The third wolf had gone straight for Bianca. She mutters something along the lines of, "I don't get paid enough for this," just before they tackled her to the floor, the pair rolling into the undergrowth. I watch in horror as she pulls out a knife, attempting to thrust it into whoever it is on top of her.
As for Leander - Alex gave into his wolf and let him take control. He was on him faster than you can blink.
With wide eyes I watch on with pride as Leander attempts fight back but it's all in vain. Alex and his wolf are angry and if there's one thing you never do, it's piss off a wolf. Emphasis on the fact Alex is an Alpha.
Wolves are vicious, territorial and unforgiving creatures but they're also beautiful, majestic and protective. They're Pack animals, they're social animals, they rely on others and look after their own - something Leander will never understand.
He thought we'd be outnumbered but he forgot we have our pack mates on our side to help fight for us. Wolves aren't like humans, they're loyal to their last breath.
Leander could never.
Alex is a perfect juxtaposition as he fights him. His vicious and deadly moves in attempt to rip Leander limb from limb look so smooth and gentle. His motions are effortless and calculated where as Leander's are jittery and weak.
The stronger leader is obvious. Alex practices what he preaches - his men go to war with him, Leader's men go without him.
Leander looks almost lost as he fights the angry Alpha. Alex and his wolf are almost treating this like a game, snapping at his ankles and knocking him to the ground in humiliation. They're ridiculing him with pleasure.
"I knew you were weak.." Leander stutters, "Can't even face me on even grounds."
Alex growls at him, wasting no time in reining his wolf in and shifting back to his human form. Archer has moved closer to me, having a slightly more protective stance between us but my gaze doesn't leave Alex.
"Are we even yet?" Alex growls, his eyes still glowing their deadly red, "How about now?" He mockingly holds one arm behind his back.
Leander doesn't take the insult too kindly, mindlessly launching his injured form at Alex who easily dodged him and lands a mighty punch to his face. He puts his whole shoulder into it, his arm extending completely in front of him as he sends Leander crashing powerfully to the floor.
Even from here I heard the sound of his fist connecting with his face, the bone in his jaw cracking. It was almost sickening but I'm too enthralled by Alex to even spare Leander a glance. Though, in hindsight, I should have.
I should have looked at the man we all deemed down for the count. I should have spared him a glance - then maybe I'd have been able to stop what he did next. Maybe I'd have been able to call out to Alex to stop him just in time, but it was too late.
I was too preoccupied with racing past Archer towards Alex. Alex was too preoccupied with turning to scan me up and down for injuries, his eyes lingering on the blood that stains my clothes.. his clothes.
A thundering gunshot resounds through the air.
It's like I run into an invisible wall, my entire body freezing and hitting a barrier of pain. My eyes flash over to the half conscious Leander on the floor, zeroing in on the gun in his hand with faint smoke residue trailing out the end.
My eyes widen, my whole body going cold. My heartbeat throbs like a powerful drum in my head, my ears ringing - deafening me from the commotion. My vision becomes dazed and unable to focus on anything as I scan the scenery before me.
Agony.
That's all I feel. An intense, soul destroying agony that radiates from my left shoulder, all the way down my arm and throughout the entirety of my body.
I want to scream as a way to release the immense pain but I can't even bring myself to open my mouth. The only movements I can achieve are my eyes frantically scanning my surroundings and the occasional blink.
"I told you what would happen Blue, even Archer warned you." Leander begins to push himself back to his feet but his words are just noise that echo in the background of my head.
I will my legs to move, begging them to fucking do something other than leave me standing here like a useless statue. The adrenaline flooding my body somehow turning it numb altogether.
My eyes finally land on his green ones, nothing but agony in his eyes as he looks at me. Nothing but concern. No, this can't be happening right now.
I attempt to run forward but it's too late. I watch him collapse to his knees and then the floor in front of me, not even flinching at the contact with the solid ground.
"NO!" I scream, finally finding some sort of movement in my legs that propels me forward. I feel Archer reach for my wrist but I slip right through his useless grip.
A chorus of howls resonate from far off, cancelling out every other sound that exists. It starts with one and slowly they all join in, each and every howl louder than the last.
My body is moving on autopilot, racing to his side despite all commotion that has come about behind me. More wolves break through the clearing, more Pales race after them, all sides coming together at full force. The reinforcements had finally arrived.
Ignoring all of it I collapse to the floor at his side. Taking his head into my hands and lifting it off the floor first before rolling him over onto his back by his shoulder.
"Oh my god."
My hands are shaking like an earthquake is happening in my arms, my mind hazy from the amount of blood surrounding him and the minuscule movements of his chest.
"B-ba..by.." he croak, attempting to lift his hand to my face. I take his hand into mine, bringing it up to my lips and pressing a firm kiss to his palm.
"Alex." My eyes well with tears as I look at him. I use one hand to keep his hand on my cheek, the other reaching down to press against his chest.
I await the tingles, long for the feeling of pain I get when I do this but they don't come. The sob wracks my body as fear floods my chest.
No, this is not happening. I won't let him die. I failed Liam, I'm not going to fail Alex. My Alex.
His thumb slowly wipes my cheek, catching the tears that I can't seem to control.
I've never felt hurt like this.
This hurts man. It hurts so fucking bad.
Please, whoever that voice in my head was, if I ever needed you, now's the time. Help me! Please, I'll do fucking anything! Just help me!
"Help me dammit!" I snap, moving my hand around on Alex's chest.
The fight continues to reign on around us but I have no sense of how it's going or who's winning. I briefly perceived someone say Alpha, deducing the neighbouring packs have arrived... late.
Alex repeats those same three words as a mantra, over and over again, "I love you."
"Stop acting like this is the end Wolfie." I cant bring myself to be harsh, the words only coming out broken as I caress his face. If only I knew what would come next.
I push his hair out of his eyes, I know how annoying he finds that loose curl that always hangs over his forehead. He keeps saying he's going to cut it short but he never does because he knows I like it. I also know he likes it when I run my fingers through his hair to help get it out of his face.
"I j.. just want you to.. to know." He caresses my cheek.
A wobbly smile graces my face, tears pouring down my cheeks. How is he the one comforting me right now? Trying to hush me and soothe my tears. That shouldn't be his job, that's mine.
It's too late for him.
What? No! It's not! I won't accept that. I will never accept that! That stupid voice is back again with a useless, unwanted statement. She's wrong!
A sob wracks my body, feeling his arm becoming heavier in my hand. He offers me a gentle smile, his eyes floating away from mine.
"Alexander, baby, please." I beg, "Please!"
I feel it before I see it.
My heart being ripped out of my chest and thrown to the ground, stomped on and shredded into nothing right in front of me. The pieces being tossed to the wind and carried every which way so I'll never see it whole again.
It's what I don't feel against my palm that confirms it. There's no gentle heartbeat against my hand.
"I'm sorry," I wail, pressing my forehead against his, "I'm so so sorry." This is all my fault. All of this is my fault.
If I had just fucking stayed in the bunker then none of this would have happened. He wouldn't have had to listen to Leander because Leander wouldn't have had me at gunpoint.
If I had just been logical for once in my life then maybe I could have stopped this. Stopped my whole life getting ripped away from me. Stopped him from slipping through my fingertips.
If I hadn't been so careless, maybe I'd be able to hold him one last time. See him smile at me with his eyes lit up and those little dimples in his cheeks. Hear him laugh at one of my terrible jokes and yes, I admit they really are bad jokes. Kiss him and feel him kiss me back, pulling me closer to him like he couldn't get closer to me if he tried.
I'd do anything to experience everything with him, just one last time.
My entire body wracks with uncontrollable sobs, my bottom lip jutted out. My grip doesn't loosen on his head, not letting him go. I will never let him go.
"I mean it. I'm never letting you go baby, never." I kiss his hand, resting my lips on his knuckles.
We never got our time together. Never got to make memories together. Never got to do all the things we wanted to do together. Never got to be together.
The weight of the guilt crushes me, ripping me apart from the inside out. He was my everything - I was just too afraid to admit it.
All he ever did was care for me, look after me.. love me. And what did I do? I didn't even tell him how I felt. I took everything he did for me for granted and I'll never be able to tell him how much I appreciate him.
He couldn't have been more perfect and I couldn't have been more terrible to him.
I already miss him.
His laugh. His smile. His hugs. His kisses. His heart. His kindness. His everything. I've never missed someone more - it's absolute torture.
I can't handle the excruciating pain of seeing him like this. He's so peaceful, so still.
With a solemn sob and one last look at the exquisite green of his irises, I carefully close his eyelids. Closing his eyes to the world for the last time.
He missed out on so much. He never got to see Dom and Summer's baby. He never got to see us at the waterfall, somewhere he promised to take me the moment this was all over. He never got to see his sisters grow up and find their mates. He never got to see us grow old together. He never got to see the morning sunrise one more time.
Worst of all, he never got to see his own pup because he never even got to be a father.
I can help, but at a cost.
Fucking anything, I don't even fucking care what it is. She could have me walking over Lego with wet socks on, wearing just a bra and shorts in negative 50°C and I'd do that for forever if it means Alex is okay.
The sensation in my arm suddenly comes back full force, flooding my body with immense pressure. It burns my insides, twisting and turning through my body.
This can be as painful as it wants, I will sit through it a thousand times over for him.
I watch as his face contorts, his eyes pinching shut, eyebrows furrowed and cherry lips falling open. I squeeze his hand on my cheek, shakily turning my face to press a soothing kiss to his palm.
It doesn't take long for that lightness from before to hit me, making me feel like a feather floating on air. I begin to feel dizzy but I keep my hand firmly pressed against his chest like I did to the wolf earlier, the sensation will go away when he's healed and I will not stop until then. Not a second sooner.
Come on baby, please be okay.
The sudden gasp of air has me crying out in relief, "Oh thank god." I breathe heavy, his gasping breaths putting my mind at ease.
The sensation continues, making me feel more and more dizzy. Blinking with wide eyes, I hold Alex close to me. Open your eyes baby, please open your eyes. Let me see that beautiful green!
His eyes shoot open, searching his surroundings in a frenzy until they land on me. They rake over my face, taking me in like it's the first time he's ever seen me.
"Hi." I whisper, slowly becoming more and more lightheaded. Is the world swaying or is that me?
"Hi." He whispers right back, like this moment between us would be broken if he'd said it any louder.
His eyes stray from mine for less than a second before widening, some sort of realisation dawning on him.
"Blue, stop!" He pulls my hand away from him by my wrist, sitting up as fast as he can to support my drowsy body. "It's too much."
"I don't care. I don't care, I don't care, I don't care." I move to touch his chest again but he takes both my wrists in his hands, stopping me from moving.
I stare up at him with pleading eyes, the tears still pouring down my cheeks. His whole face softens as he caresses my cheek freely with his hand now. His fingertips dancing delicately over my skin.
"I love you." He whispers and moves to press his forehead gently against mine, both of our eyes closing to relish this feeling. I place my hand on Alex's chest over his heart, feeling it beat against my palm.
I could stay like this forever.
"Aww, well isn't this touching?" We both jump, turning to face Lander. He's stood a few metres away from us, a hand placed over where a heart would be if he had one. His face has a massive bruise on his left cheek, his eye in the process of swelling shut.
"Alpha dies, Luna saves him only for them both to die together right after. Kind of poetic really." He steps closer, Alex growling at him.
"You're not going to touch her." He stands to his feet, gently pulling me up behind him and holding my wrist in his hand. His thumb rubs slow circles against my skin, distracting me from putting all my focus into staying on my wobbly feet.
I never knew healing someone that much would make me feel this dizzy. It's like a never ending head rush, my feet acting as though I've just spun around in a circle a hundred times.
I stumble out of Alex's grip and fall against the leaves on the floor. Alex is quick to crouch down at my side, one hand supporting my head while the other rests on my hip.
On weak arms I push myself up into a half sat position. My eyes are still dazed, struggling to focus on Alex in front of me.
"You're okay, I've got you." He helps me back up to my feat and I lean against a nearby tree, putting all my weight on the bark and using it as my support.
Alex keeps ahold of my hand as he turns back to face Leander. He's busy rolling his eyes at us, well.. eye. Alex beat one shut.
"You're a deadman." Alex threatens, his thumb slowly caressing my knuckles.
"I'm sure," Leander hums, turning around and beginning to stroll away. In his place comes a group of men, all armed and ready for a fight.
Alex growls threateningly at them, as if daring them to make a move. He turns back to me with a look of concern, "I'm fine," I reassure him, raising my arm to indicate he go, "kick their asses."
With great reluctance, he drops my hand and steps forward. A smirk plays on his lips as he cracks his neck, the growl cowering in front of him. I hardly make out the commotion that occurs between them, scanning the surroundings instead.
It's absolute chaos. Wolves are chasing Pales and Humans alike, ripping each and every one apart. The humans are dropping like flies. The Pales, though their numbers are a lot smaller than before, take a bit more to kill but they're being beaten just as easily.
The wolves are picking them all off one by one and I couldn't be happier.
A hand wraps around my wrist, snapping me out of my daze to see Archer. He's taken ahold of my wrist and is trying to pull me with him.
"Come on, we need to go." He tugs on my arm.
"What?" I snatch my arm away from him, "no." He steps towards me so I take two, much larger, steps back. I stumble ever so slightly but manage to keep my balance.
"Blue, we need to go." He says slower, as if talking to a child and retaking my wrist in his.
"I said no!" I struggle in his grip but can't break out in my weakened state. Even standing up is exhausting for me. I pull against his hand, using all my strength to get out of his hold but he's too strong and is easily pulling me along behind him.
"Archer, let me go! Stop!" I cry out, taking ahold of a tree with my free hand.
"For fucks sake!" He curses as I grip the trunk of the three for dear life.
"Archer, leave me alone!" I kick at him with my leg but that doesn't seem to deter him. He lets go of my wrist, going to grab my waist but I hurry away from him.
"Alex!" I call out, rushing as fast as I can towards where I saw him last.
"Blue!" Archer hurried behind me, tackling me to the floor. He pulls something out of his pocket and next thing I know he's locking my wrists in a pair of cuffs.
"What the fuck! Take them off!" I try to pull my wrists out of them, only resulting in a sharp pain when they tighten.
He roughly pulls me back onto my feet so I resort to screaming bloody murder. I frantically kick and flail my arms about to try and break free from his hold but he simply tosses me over his shoulder and begins walking.
"Help!" I cry out, not giving up on kicking or screaming. "Archie, get off!" I beat at his back. I even go so far as to grab a branch on a nearby tree to try stop him but it does nothing more than cut up my hands.
"Blue!" I hear Alex call and I look up to see him battling his way towards me, "I'm coming!"
I'm coming for you baby.
I try to slow Archer's advances as best I can, pining for Alex's touch. I watch on as Alex battles his way towards me but no matter how many people he takes out, another 10 replace them.
He's becoming frantic and frenzied, a group of wolves copying his actions to try and make their way through the defensive lines and get to me.
"Stop! Let me go! Alex!" I cry out, kicking at Archer's front and pounding against his back.
I begin to hear the sound of engines and peer behind me to see Archer approaching some kind of armoured truck.
"No. No, NO, NO!" I flail around, feeling completely useless. No matter what I do, I can't get out of Archer's grip.
"Let me go!" I scream, punching one of the nearby guards across the face and knocking him back. "Stop!"
I feel Alex step up into the van, continuing to curse each and everyone out, though my eyes don't stray from Alex's.
"Blue!" He races towards me, more and more Humans and Pales alike blocking his path to get to me.
"Alex!" I reach out, even though he's nowhere near me. I still have hope. "I l-" the van door is slammed shut right in my face, leaving me to mutter, "-ove you."
Archer tosses me down and two men grab my shoulders to keep me still as I begin to fight for a way out. He connects the cuffs around my wrists to a chain attacked to the floor, my eyes going wide.
"You can't do this! You can't keep me here!" I protest.
"I think you'll find we can." Leander's voice makes me jump and I spot him stood at the other end beside Archer.
I open my mouth to argue, only for a gag to be shoved in my mouth instead. I feel the rumble of the engine as the car begins to drive through the trees.
Baby, I'm coming. I'm going to find you and I'm going to bring you home. I promise, Blue. I'm coming!
I nod to myself, accepting his promise while simultaneously cursing myself for not knowing how to reply.
I slam my head hard back against the metal wall behind me, gaining the attention of everyone else in the can. An intense feeling of frustration builds inside me from not knowing how to reply to him. Stupid Blue.
You can't even break free from a simple hold. This is your fault. Everything that's happened is because of you.
From the day I entered the Capitol my world has been flipped upside down. There's so many rules and customs the wolves have that I don't know or understand but was expected to follow.
I had a target shoved on my back from day 1 - not even a month into being there was I bitten by a bloody vampire! It's just so mind bending and I've been overwhelmed from the start.
But, in spite if all of that, it felt like it was all worth it. I may have been screwed over mentally, all of it so much to take in, but I got to meet the greatest group of people I've known in my entire life.
The boys have become the closest people in my life, they're my best friends, my brothers. I can feel the tears building up in my eyes but I fight back the sobs. I'm not going to cry.
I won't let myself cry - I can't let Leander or any of them see that.
I know they're going to take good care of Mia. She's got all of the boys and Donna to look after her, even Alex. My silly Wolfie likes her more than he cares to admit.
I swore I would never do anything that puts Mia in harms way, I'd do anything to keep her from danger and that's the exact reason made sure she wouldn't be here with me.
I knew Leander would find a way to bring me back with him, that's what he wanted. That's why he was shocked when I told him to kill me. He told Archer to do it because I know he knew Archer wouldn't.
He needs me, and I want to know why.
"Don't look so glum, we did you a favour Blue." Leander humourlessly chuckles from his seat in the vehicle, the gag preventing me from coming up with a reply. I keep my face impassive, staring at the chains that encompass my wrists and are bolted to the floor of the van.
The tears have built up to the point I physically can't hold them in my eyes anymore and they roll down my cheeks. My heart is already aching in my chest.
My mother always told me when you find the one it's like everything just falls into place. She told me how precious love is and that when you find that one person, that one person who manages to make everything make sense, it all just feels right. My father was him for her.
And Alexander is him for me.
Whenever he looked at me it was as if every ounce of breath was taken from my lungs, floating into the air like midnight smoke. Every time he kissed me it felt like the world stopped, leaving just the two of us to wander the earth together. Every time he held my face between his hands it felt like he was untying all of my knots. Holding me for eternity in the arms I've grown so accustomed to.
This is what falling in love is like, a story you never wanted to end.
For so long I imagined everything my mother had described to me. I longed to feel it, experience it, achieve even a sliver of the happiness she found with my father. I always said that when I find it, I would never lose it - lose this thing that makes me feel so complete.
And I've found all of it in him; Alexander Black.
Falling for him, that was the easiest part; it was admitting it to myself that was hard. I don't even know what made it so hard for me to admit that I am in love with him.
I am completely, endlessly, irrevocably, head over heels in love with him.
But it's too late.
I'm chained to an armoured truck that's taking me to the Resistance. Taking me away from Alex and everyone else I love, surrounded by angry people hellbent on killing every last wolf.
But I need to put on a brave face. I need to hide my true feelings and I need to gain their trust. I need them to need me, I need them to trust me because I want to know what they're planning.
I want to know everything.
And because of that, here I am;
Running from the Wolves.