Destiny is trapped in darkness. It's the sort of darkness that's so thick that it feels like you can't move. She's suffocating, confined in an empty space. She's running. She's running and she can't stop. There's something behind her and she's fleeing from it, stumbling through everything without any sense of direction. There's not even a scent to guide her.
Where's Diaval? He said he'd take her somewhere safe, or...did he? He said she couldn't stay.
Because Shredder killed the turtles. He took away the closest thing she had ever had to a family and, without them...
"Destiny."
She skids to a stop so sharply that she pitches forward, falling to her knees with only her hands to stop her fall. She stares at the floor, the endless darkness beneath her, shaking and breathing hard, sweat running down her face. Why does she ache so much? Why is it so hard to breathe?
"Diaval?" she asks, looking around.
The pale boy seems to materialize from nowhere. He moves like he's floating, holding his hand out as a silent invitation, but she doesn't take it. He hides it beneath his cloak again as she slowly pushes herself up so that she's seated on her knees, starting out at the nothingness, and he stands before her. Waiting.
"They're in trouble," he says. "Can'tcha feel it?"
"Who?" she asks.
He stares down at her, his hair rustling as if blown by wind that Destiny can't feel. A sinking feeling floods her stomach and a moment later, there's a scream that echoes from everywhere. Her heart wrenches and she nearly cries out.
Leo? It can't be. He was dead. They were all dead.
"Kill 'em," Diaval orders, pointing to something behind her.
She looks over her shoulder as five figures dressed in black step toward her. They watch her with cold eyes, weapons in hand, not a hint of remorse anywhere. Then, they step aside and the Shredder comes forward, his tekkō-kagi still rusted with old blood.
Hatred floods her. He's the one who ruined everything.
She bares her teeth and moves before she can think about it. Her uchigatana materializes in her grip as she lunges, but the figures scatter. Shredder disappears but she won't let him get away this time. She'll find him, destroy him for what he's done!
Again and again, she swings her sword and the assailants fight back. She's faintly aware of them fighting back, punching and kicking, but her senses are dulled. She fights harder with every blow they land on her.
One of the figures grabs her face, freezing her for a second, and Destiny faintly hears a voice—feminine, firm, desperate.
"It's us! Please!"
Destiny lets out a terrified scream as she yanks herself away from their touch, heart pounding. "Don't touch me! LEAVE ME ALONE! I'LL KILL YOU!"
The figure disappears and Destiny whirls around as two more attack. Tears roll down her face against her will, her anger turning to desperation. Why can't they leave her alone? Haven't they hurt her enough?
She spins around, sword raised as the Shredder appears before her, but a hand falls on her shoulder and she freezes. Diaval stands at her side.
"Wait," he murmurs. "Listen."
Destiny's hands tremble and the Shredder stays before her, silent. She just wants to swing, to cut him in two. Diaval's grip gets tighter.
But she listens. And she hears a voice, so faint she can barely make out the words.
"Just...just know that I love you."
A sharp pain lances through her head and she flinches hard. That voice...it can't be.
"Leo?" she calls into the darkness.
His voice comes again, clearer this time. "I know you're in there, Destiny. I love you. I love you."
Her arms drop, her sword disappearing as her mouth falls open. She can't remember anyone ever saying that to her. Nobody has ever loved her.
Diaval's grip spasms and she looks at him just as he flinches, letting out a breathy gasp. He stumbles away from her, gripping his head, trembling.
"What's going on?" she demands. "Tell me!"
"Go," he pleads. "Before it's too late."
He disappears and the instant he's gone, the heaviness around her releases. She takes a deep breath as her mind clears, only for a sharp pain to return once more.
She wakes with her mouth a breath away from closing around Leonardo's throat.
She blinks, confusion worming its way in as she raises her head. Leonardo has his eyes closed and he's sweaty, exhausted, and if it weren't for the faint rise and fall of his chest, Destiny would believe him to be dead. She's got him pinned down, claws embedded in his arms.
She lurches off of him, earning a groan as her claws retract from his skin.
"Leonardo?"
Slowly, he opens his eyes. He takes her in, relief flooding his face as he forces himself to his feet. His arms bleed from the multiple identical puncture wounds.
"You're back? You're really back?" he asks, his tone hopeful.
She feels herself shrinking as she returns to her normal form, only to hiss as she clutches her side. When she pulls her hand away, it's coated in blood. Her vision scissors. Everything hurts—her nose, her body, her mouth. Why can she taste blood?
She stumbles once before her knees give out and she collapses, a soft moan of agony leaving her. Leonardo catches her, encasing her in his arms, clutching her like he never has before. He's solid and warm, familiar. The confusion remains.
"You...you were dead," she whispers as he strokes her hair. "Shredder got to the lair, he...Leo..."
"Ssh, no, we're...we're here. We're alive."
She looks over his shoulder and her blood runs cold.
Donatello and Michelangelo lay in unconscious heaps on the floor, Casey's shirt is soaked in blood and April works desperately to staunch the flow while keeping him half-alert, and Raphael cradles an obviously broken arm. Broken weapons, hockey pucks, and shuriken litter the floor, scattered amongst spots of blood and bits of black fur. Next to Shredder's throne is a tiny two-legged robot with an arrow through the head and, on the other end of the room, Diaval's body.
Destiny's attention falls on Raphael again and only then does she realize that his arm isn't just broken, it's been bitten by something with a very large mouth. Donatello's leg has a matching mark and she realizes just why she has the taste of blood in her mouth.
"What have I done?" she croaks.
Leonardo pulls back from the hug. "Diaval and Shredder made you do this, Des. It wasn't—"
"It was me. I fell for it. I gave him control," she whispers. His hand touches hers and she flinches, yanking it away from him. His eyes widen and she shoves away from him, forcing herself to her feet. "No, get away from me!"
"Destiny—"
"I'm a monster...I nearly killed all of you!"
She can't look away from the carnage, at her wounded friends and the bruises blooming on their bodies, the scratches lining their shells. April is the only one who doesn't have any noticeable injuries, but there's a distant look in her eyes and she grips her tessen like it's the only thing keeping her grounded. She doesn't meet Destiny's eyes.
Destiny's breaths sharpen, her chest far too tight. She searches for solace, for someone to tell her that this is just another nightmare, and she spins around to lock eyes with Raphael. He'll tell her the truth. He'll be painfully, bluntly honest, but the Raphael she finds is foreign. His eyes are anguished and cloudy, teeth gritted against harsh, pained breaths, but his anger is gone. He stares at her like he's waiting for her to finish him off.
It chokes her.
Raphael...Raphael is scared of me.
Her hands shake and she stumbles again, knees weak. There's a pool of blood underneath Casey, too much blood.
"A-April, is..." She swallows hard against the lump in her throat. "Is he...?"
April doesn't look at her. "Still breathing," she says, barely a whisper, like she's reminding herself. "Still...still breathing."
Destiny stays locked in place, stuck for a moment before a sharp, lancing pain fills her head. She lets out a pained yelp as she drops to one knee, gripping her ears. Shredder's face flashes in her head, malice, hatred, and for a second, she bares her teeth as she snaps her head up, a growl in her throat.
Raphael's hand flies to his sai.
Tears roll down her face as a sharp breath leaves her. "Raph...I...I wouldn't..."
He doesn't relax, doesn't let go of his weapon, and the fire has returned to his eyes. He'll do whatever it takes to keep her away from his brothers, from Casey, and she deserves it. Her heart aches but she doesn't have words.
"Des—" Leonardo again, coming closer to her.
She spins to him, holding her hands up as she tries to back up, only for her feet to fail her as she tumbles back. Leonardo holds his hands out, half-reaching for her, half showing that he too isn't dangerous. But she knows he isn't. It's not him she's worried about.
"Don't!" she snaps, hands out as she shoves herself back another few inches.
He seems to blur as she focuses on her hands, stained with blood, green flesh caked beneath her nails. Her brain aches, like someone keeps yanking on it with a heavy chain and, again, the Shredder's wrath slams into her. She looks at Leonardo and it's all a mess. Agony, desperation, then a flash of hatred that doesn't match her true feelings.
"We have to go," Leonardo urges. "We'll make it alright, Destiny. I promise."
"No," she insists, shaking her head as she shrinks back from him even further. Whatever took control of her still has a hold and the Shredder is near. "No, I...you have to go. You have to leave me here."
"I'm not gonna do that."
"You have to!" she begs, but he doesn't move, still reaching for her. More tears roll down her cheeks. "Damn it, Leo, I'm supposed to be the stubborn one!"
He purses his lips and a weak sob leaves her. He won't let her go. He'll never let her go because he loves her and she wants to love him back. She wants to love him so badly.
It's up to her. It tears her up inside, breaks her heart all over again, but she won't make him leave. She's young, she's stupid, she's not in control of herself anymore, and it all scares her to death. Maybe this is a coward's move, but she'll take being a coward if it protects them. Leonardo, Raphael, Donatello, Michelangelo, Casey, April; they're too important to lose. They're too important to her.
Whatever miracle ripped her away from the Shredder isn't strong enough to make things okay. Whether it was love or something else, it isn't strong enough.
Destiny wishes that Leonardo had stopped her. She wishes that he had rushed into the battle and cut her down before she could hurt his family. She wishes she had never woken up from the nightmare, even if it meant never seeing him again.
She'd look at him forever if she could. She'd ask to stay by his side until the end if only the world weren't so cruel. How can she tell him that she loves him after what she's done?
She forces herself to her feet. Her throat hurts. Her eyes itch. Her body is sore, bloody and beaten.
"Just come back," Leonardo breathes. "It'll be okay."
He's wrong. No matter what he says, it won't be okay, maybe not for a long time, maybe never. She can't go back with him. She can't go home. She can't pull him into her arms and tell him just how much he means to her, how meeting him was the best thing that could have happened to her.
She's still dangerous, she's still a monster, and she could still kill him. She would rather die than let that happen.
"Leo...I'm sorry," she whispers, voice an inch from breaking.
Leonardo comes closer, but she reacts first. She changes back into a wolf, dwarfing him in an instant, and Leonardo's steps falter as he stares up at her with wide, terrified eyes. Good, she thinks. Please, be scared enough not to follow.
"LEO!" Raphael cries, his voice breaking.
She turns away from him and runs at the nearest window, lowering her head and ramming her shoulder right through the glass. It shatters against her bulk as she bursts into the cool night air, landing atop the roof with a sharp cry.
She looks back one more time, a single second to remind herself why she's leaving before she runs away, leaping across the rooftops. She has to stay away until it's safe again. She has to stay away until she's strong enough to face her fear because today, anyone could call her a coward and she wouldn't object.
To keep them alive, she has to leave.
I'm sorry.