By the time the next lesson came around, the sadness had transformed into insurmountable rage. It wasn't just this situation on its own - though having to denounce my nation in front of the very people who had destroyed it was bad enough. It was more a build-up of everything I'd endured in this country, all the hate directed at other nations, all the insults, all the lies. This was just the last straw.
Thankfully, I could just fake a twisted ankle in order to not participate in the next lesson - it was just bending practice (or regular martial arts in my case, since I couldn't bend). I was sent up to the library with another girl to work on homework instead.
That day, I took out my books as usual, hoping the work would distract me. It did not. If anything, it made me even angrier. The lies, the propaganda was everywhere, permeating every page of every Fire Nation textbook. Maths questions about finding the speed of a Fire Navy warship, Biology texts about the Fire Nation's genetic superiority, not even mentioning the required reading for Literature.
I couldn't focus. Emotions swirled around in my head, an inferno of shame and despair and rage. Intense, all-consuming rage, rage to an extent I had never felt before. I hated this country and everything it stood for.
They had come for my people. An entire race, human beings with homes and beliefs and best friends, mercilessly slaughtered at the hands of Sozin. Pacifists that had, even with the Avatar, never been a threat to anyone. All wiped out, dead.
And then, what made it all the more painful, they had the audacity to lie about it. Making the Air Nomads out to be stupid and uncivilized - simultaneously an empty mountain wasteland full of dumb hippies, and a violent nation threatening the Fire Lord with a full-fledged army of its own. It was trash, complete and utter nonsense, all of it.
I hated the Fire Nation, and I hated not being allowed to say that out loud. I wanted to scream it from the rooftops, to rip up all the textbooks, tear down all the propaganda posters. To blow up the tanks, sink the ships, break the walls. To destroy every reminder of the pain this country had brought to me, and so many others. To get my revenge. I wanted this place to burn.
"(y/n)!"
The girl's voice broke through my train of thought.
"(y/n), what on earth are you doing?"
"Huh?" I asked. I wasn't doing anything...
"The table!" she cried. "Look at the table!"
The smell of burning wood suddenly hit me, and I looked down to see that somebody had lit the table on fire. With growing horror, I looked at my hands, and realised that it was me.
//////
When (y/n) came home, she was relieved to find both her parents in the lounge.
"Hello dear! How was school?" asked Mayako cheerfully.
"Mayako... Tomin... I need to tell you something."
"What's wrong, (y/n)?" asked Tomin.
"Well... I think I should just show you," (y/n) whispered. She hesitated, then held out her hand. After a few seconds, a small flame appeared on it.
"Wow, (y/n)... I thought..." started Tomin. He didn't know what to say.
What he saw worried him. For two years, he'd been convinced that the mysterious Air Nomad child he had taken in couldn't bend, a thought that brought him great relief. If she couldn't bend, that would be easier for everyone - no hidden abilities, no awful punishments when the truth inevitably rose to the surface. However, after what he'd just seen... This was much worse.
"Aren't you meant to be an airbender?" he finally said.
(y/n) said nothing, only stared at the floor.
"How did you find out? How long have you known?" asked Mayako.
"I found out today. I don't want to talk about how."
"Okay."
Mayako also didn't know what to say. She'd seen (y/n) try to bend before, but to no avail, so why now? What did this mean? But, she remembered, (y/n) was probably more confused about it than she was, and so she needed support in this difficult time. Mayako quickly replaced the shock on her face with a smile.
"Well, I guess that means you should learn to firebend! I can teach you, if you want."
(y/n) thought about it for a few seconds. Her decision depended on an extremely important question that she couldn't yet answer - the question Tomin had asked - wasn't she meant to be an airbender? If she was an airbender with the additional use of fire - if that was even possible - then that would be okay, she thought. But if she wasn't actually an airbender - if this meant her biological parents had somehow been from the Fire Nation... well, she hated this country. She felt sick at the mere thought. It was one thing to be adopted by two of the very few actually good people there were in this country. But actually being from the Fire Nation herself? That was another thing entirely. (y/n) stood in place, looking at the floor, not knowing what to answer. As it turned out, she didn't have to answer anything.
Knock, knock.
"I wonder who that is?" said Tomin, "I'll go check."
He didn't have time to open the door before five Fire Nation policemen kicked it down.
"General Tomin! Mayako!" one of them yelled. "You are hereby arrested for the possession of banned literature, a subset of treason!"
Nobody tried to deny it. They knew they were guilty.
"I'm sorry," whispered Mayako, and after that, nobody spoke. The family walked dejectedly out of their house, surrounded by Fire Nation soldiers. They were done for.
By the time Tomin, Mayako and (y/n) arrived at their destination, the sun was already beginning to set. The beautiful colours of the sky, exquisite shades of pink, orange, and purple, provided a stark contrast to the large, grey cube of a building that (y/n) guessed must be a secret police station. Inside the building, there were mazes of corridors, leading to rows upon rows of reinforced metal doors.
"Where is this?" asked Tomin, breaking the ominous silence that had fallen. But there was no reply. Just more and more guards, hallways, locked rooms. It was a good example of Fire Nation architecture, thought (y/n), trying her hardest to distract herself with sarcasm. Truly the epitome of this country's ideals. Order, monotony, despair.
After a few minutes, or perhaps a few hours of walking - (y/n) couldn't quite decide what felt more real - they finally reached a door, seemingly no different from the rest. The policemen opened it, and threw the family inside. It was a plain room, with nothing but three chairs, a desk, and a person (y/n) didn't know sitting behind it. As soon as the last of the policemen entered, he started speaking.
"Tomin... Mayako. I wish I could say I'm happy to see you, but under these circumstances... Oh dear, I expected better from a General."
He paused for effect, the dim candlelight illuminating his sadistic grin.
"A few days ago, we received a tip from, let's say... a very important and reputable source, that you had some banned books hidden in your house. We have concluded that this is indeed the case."
Mayako suddenly sat up in her chair, a cold sweat breaking out on her forehead.
"When did you search the house? I'm there all the time and I didn't notice anything!"
"Well... Technically, no formal search was conducted." The man smirked. "But the aforementioned source saw it all personally, and we have no reason to disbelieve them. Sometimes, the word of a person important enough is sufficient evidence."
Seeing Mayako's dumbfounded expression, he went on.
"I know what you must be thinking. This is unfair! But, since you've been reading forbidden literature... You should know better than anyone that the Fire Nation is not always a nation of justice."
Mayako stared at the floor in defeat, or maybe just so that she didn't have to look at the creepy smile that never seemed to leave the man's face. She didn't know what else to say. Whoever it was who snitched, it was clearly someone of great importance. There was nothing she could do.
After a while, Tomin spoke. "What will happen to us now?"
"Well, you see..."
The man got up from his desk and took a step towards Tomin.
"If you'd just been a regular citizen, Tomin, then you and your wife would have been sent to... a compulsory work therapy centre. But, Tomin, you are no regular citizen, oh no!"
He bent down until his eyes were level with Tomin's, and still, his smile remained intact.
"Fire Lord Ozai expected much better from someone entrusted with the duties of a General. And he took your betrayal very personally. He really did have faith in you, you know? Your -"
"Just get to the point," interrupted Mayako. It was unbearable listening to the man's sinister taunts. He slowly turned around to look at her, sick pleasure written all over his face.
"Oh my, someone's forgotten their manners! But alright, I'll do as you wish. In short - Tomin, Mayako, you are to be executed. (y/n)..." he looked at the girl, acknowledging her presence seemingly for the first time. "You are to watch."
A suffocating silence filled the room. There was nothing left to say.
The sun blazed orange in the scarlet sky, casting huge, purple shadows behind every pebble. No birds sang, no insects circled each other in the cool evening air. The whole world was quiet, nature itself frozen in time, watching, waiting. Only one thing moved, something that nobody had noticed until now, its slender silhouette swaying gently in the breeze. The small, elegant loop of a noose. Pitch-black against the burning horizon, the concrete facility stood still. Then, suddenly, a door opened, and two people were led out of the building.
It was inevitable that things would end this way, Tomin supposed. He always thought it was a possibility, ever since he felt his heartbeat quicken at Mayako's smile for the first time, and, by the time (y/n) had come home with him, he knew it was the only outcome. As the noose tightened around his neck, and his body thrashed about wildly in mid-air as if it was no longer his own, he felt a sense of calm wash through him for the first time in years. Tomin died with no regrets.
Mayako was next, trembling as she walked up to the spot where her husband had just died. She had always been ready to die fighting for her beliefs, and now that she was writhing on the coarse rope, mouth agape for oxygen that would never reach her lungs, she stuck firmly by her convictions. What she did regret was bringing her husband and her daughter (for she had grown to view (y/n) as such) into this. "I'm sorry," she said, her last words almost unintelligible through her futile gasps for air. And then it was over, Mayako's shame and guilt wiped away completely, like waves washing away shells and pebbles from the shore. Her body hung limply from the noose.
The sun sank further into the horizon, the crimson flames of the sunset sky slowly fading, replaced by deep shades of blue. The harsh shadows softened, lost their purple tint, and the shroud of silence was slowly lifted from the world. Crickets chirped in the bushes, leaves rustled as hedgehogs and raccoons ran past. But the giant concrete block stood still and quiet as ever. A few men came out eventually, dragged two lifeless bodies into the facility, then left, locking the steel door behind them. They didn't say anything to the crying girl sat a short distance away from the noose, body collapsed in a shaking heap, tears streaming down her cheeks. Her bloodshot (e/c) eyes met the unforgiving grey of the men's, and they said all that needed to be said. (Y/n) had lost everything.
/////
It had been a week since my parents died. After it happened, I was taken home by some men, and told I had seven days to grieve, get my belongings together, and move out. They didn't tell me where I'd be going next, and, to be honest, I don't think they either knew or cared themselves.
I didn't go back to school. I think even if I'd tried to, they would have turned me away before I so much as set foot in the building. Who would want to educate the child of traitors? Not that I missed that place, anyway.
I stayed at home that week, sat in my parents' bedroom, stared at the walls. The bedrooms were the only place that remained mostly untouched by the police. I didn't dare go into the library again. It was probably destroyed.
I spent my time trying to think about the happiest moments I'd shared with my parents. It was useless trying not to think about them at all, so I figured if I had to remember, I'd at least try to remember only the good bits. Even so, I could not stop the horrific images flashing before my eyes. When I slept, the memory resurfaced again and again, playing on repeat in my mind like a broken record from hell. I tried not to go to bed those nights. It was better to be sleep deprived than to witness it all over again.
The days should have by all means passed slowly, but before I knew it, it was time to leave. I didn't want to go through all the rooms of the house, so I only took what I really needed. Food and clothes. Basic sanitary supplies. A tent. My mother's hairpin. My father's knife. And with that, I was on my way, closing the door of the house I'd lived in for two and a half years for the last time.
Without a particular direction in mind, I started walking. The streets of Royal Caldera City spread out before me, lined with houses and fancy gardens and ceremonial buildings. The road was wide and clean, everything kept perfectly in order. The sky was clear and the weather was hot. I took in my surroundings - really took it all in - for the last time. I hated all of it.
Walking through the Fire Nation Capital was different now to how it used to be with Mayako and Tomin around. I still disliked the country back then of course, but at least I could appreciate its occasional beauty - smells of bonfires and barbecues wafting out into the streets from behind the walls of wealthy residences, children running around the squares, music playing at almost any minute of the day. Now, all pleasure I had derived from my surroundings was stripped away. I hated the patriotic hymns - what right did they have to be so proud of their murderous dictatorship, anyway? The children - future Fire Nation soldiers, their hands already stained with the blood of future victims. The smells were still nice, but even they couldn't disguise the stench of death that had permeated the entire nation since they'd killed my people. And they felt no guilt for any of it!
A corner turned. Another scarlet banner. A street crossed. Propaganda posters covered the walls. A plaza traversed. A giant statue of the Fire Lord. A shopping district walked through. Portraits of Ozai in every window display.
I was sick of it, I never wanted to see any of it again. And then it came to me - I didn't have to. I had no home, no school, no friends, no parents. I was free to go wherever I wanted, travel the world, and nothing and nobody could stop me! I sat down on a bench and breathed in the fresh afternoon air. For the first time ever, I was hit with the overwhelming realisation of my freedom.
After resting for a few minutes, I set off once again, this time with a purpose in mind. I was headed to the train station. From there, I would take a train to the harbour area, then hop on a boat, and sail to wherever the wind would take me.
____________________________________
When I got off the train at the harbour station two hours later, the first thing I noticed were the crowded streets. People bustled into and out of shops, ran into factories, ducked into alleyways. It was hard to breathe with so many people around - a problem only made worse by the clouds of smoke billowing from every chimney. What worried me, though, were the soldiers. There must have been hundreds of them. They weren't exactly everywhere - though there were a few patrolling the city - but the problem was their location. The guards were concentrated near the Royal Plaza - the only way into or out of the city from the sea. There was no way I could escape with them around.
I would have to come up with a new plan. I groaned. Just when everything had been going so well... For now though, I decided to wander the city streets looking as innocent as possible. I'd work something out by nightfall, I figured, and then it would be dark and the guards wouldn't see me as easily anyway.
It took another few hours for the sun to set. By now, my legs were tired of walking. I sat down on a bench to rest.
Everything was much quieter than it had been in the afternoon. Most people had gone home, and the streets were empty, except for the odd straggler. The soldiers still remained, but a few were beginning to doze off, put to sleep by the darkness and the fresh breeze of the sea. I waited.
I didn't know what I was waiting for, exactly. I still hadn't come up with any ideas of how to escape. But, maybe, if I waited long enough, something interesting would happen and then I'd know what to do.. A minute, two minutes, then five then ten then thirty went by. Nothing happened. Then, just as I was about to stand up and resume walking, I heard a voice that made the hairs all over my body stand on end.
"YN... What a pleasant surprise."
A shiver ran down my spine as I turned around to look at Azula.