I wake up in Luke's bed alone. Everything that Zoe said pops up in my mind. I walk up to the mirror again. I pull up my shirt to see my fat. That's all I am. I am fat. Then I remember I slept with Luke. In shorts and a shirt. I am a slut. Why haven't I seen this. I'm so fat and a slut. I have to change things. I can't be known like this.
I put some yoga pants on and a hoodie. I decide to go for a jog. Anything to get this weight off. While I'm listening to music I get a text. From her.
"Hey Alex. I'm glad we talked yesterday. I hope you were ok. I could tell something was bothering you."
Oh nothing at all its just you laughed at my dad dying and called me a slut and fat. Other than that just fine.
"Oh no I'm just fine."
"That's good. I didn't want it have been something I said."
Actually it was.
"Oh no it wasnt. I'm sorry it looked like I was not ok."
"Oh it's OK Alex. Hopefully we can meet up again."
"Maybe later. Right now I'm out for a jog."
"Haha me too. Meet me at the Coffee house."
"Sure."
I take the long way(home) to the coffee house. Passing through the park. I decide to sit on the park bench and really take in the scenery. I see the oak tree. Many memories that I remember and I am slowly remembering. I wish I could remember all. A soccer ball rolls to the bottom of my feet. I pick it up. I haven't played soccer in forever. I used to be good. A young man comes up to me.
"You've got my ball."
"Oh here."
"You any good?"
"I used to be. I haven't played in a while."
"Wanna play with me and my friends?"
I really shouldn't but I decide why not.
"Sure why not."
"That's great. I'm Zach by the way."
"Alex."
I run over with Zach to his friends.
"Hey guys this is Alex. She's going to be playing with us."
"Cody"
"Will"
"Hey" I say to them.
"You're too pretty to play rough." Will said.
"Bring it."
"Ah. I like you."
I'm on Zach's team. I run to my position. Zach looks at me and smiles. I smile back. Just to single I was ready.
We get the ball and Zach passes it to me. I run down field passing Cody. Now I have him on my trail. I turn and pass it to Zach. He kicks and scores.
"I think you still got it."
"Maybe I do."
"Here's my number. Even if you are taken text me. You seem cool."
"I'll think about it."
I run to the coffee house. Zoe isn't here yet. I walk up to the counter and the man turns around. Hunter.
"Alex."
"Hunter."
"How you've been?"
"Hunter I'm not small talking with you. Just my usual ok?"
"I got ya. Usual coming up."
"Thank you."
As I turn around Zoe walks through the door.
"Alex."
"Zoe."
"Hey beautiful."
"awe Hunter. Hey handsome."
Am I missing something.
"Hunter you're dating Zoe?"
"Yea. After all the stuff we went through I knew I was never going to make it right. You're happily with Luke so I moved on and I really like Zoe."
"Awe I'm happy for you two."
"Wait you two dated?"
"Yea. but not like really dating. It was more of dating so I wouldn't find out who I was really dating."
"That makes no sense Alex." Hunter said.
"Then you explain it. The only reason we dated was I didn't remember who I was really dating so my mom said it was me and you and you went along with it."
"But then I did really like you and you went back to Luke cause you started to remember."
"So you two dated. Wait. Luke? Luke who?"
Do I say hemmings? Do I keep it a secret?
"Just Luke."
"Not Hemmings."
"Oh I'm too ugly to get that Luke."
"No you are not Alex. He would be lucky." Zoe said.
"But the one dating him is"
"Hunter shut up."
"What?"
"Nevermind Zoe."
"Just give me my coffee babe."
"Mine hunter?"
Hunter hands us our coffee and we sit down.
"You are not ugly Alex."
"You called me a slut and fat Zoe. I think I can add ugly."
"You are dating Luke Hemmings."
"Yes. For more than a year. Well with a break when I was dating Hunter cause I didn't remember Luke."
"Because of your accident."
"Ya."
"I'm so sorry I said those things. Just jealousy because you know. Luke Hemmings."
"Yea. I understand."
"I'm feel terrible."
"Oh it's ok."
"No its not. I said those things and I shouldn't have."
"It's behind us now. Please Zoe."
"Fine."
------------
I lay on the couch alone. The boys still not home. I put my hand on my stomach. I am fat. Maybe not a slut but fat and ugly. I look up Luke and new girlfriend and read the comments.
"She's just after your money. Golddigger."
"So ugly. Can do better Luke."
"She's probably a slut. Slept with hundreds of men."
"It's probably not even that model. Could be anybody. Maybe she is pretty." I smile at that one.
"Luke dump her."
Everyone is so mad. I read a few nice ones that I smile at but mostly are mean. I get up from the couch to the bathroom. I open the cabnit and pull the little box that has Luke's weed. I grab the bowl and pack it, lighting it. My baby lungs burn from the smoke but other than that it's not that bad. After 3 hits I start to feel the high. It's pretty fun actually. I take 2 more hits and put it back. Giggling i walk to the kitchen and make a bowl of captin crunch. I go to my purse and take a cigarette and light it. Not remembering how I even got a pack of cigarette, but i continue to smoke it anyways. I walk around the apartment in spandex and a flannel shirt smoking. I plop down on the couch and put spongebob on and eat my cereal, I hear keys opening the door. I stop and freeze. Mikey walks in. It's just him though.
"Mikey!" I yell at him, he walks over and sits down next to me and drapes his arm over me. I could smell the cheap liqour on his breath.
"Is it just you?"
"Alexxxx hi?"
I relight my cigarette and put it in Michaels mouth.
"Why Michael, why would you think I would do something!"
"Well you do reek of pot and your eyes are redder than the devil's dick." For some odd reason I found that the funniest thing in the world.
"It's not that funny Alex.." Even though he was laughing too.
Hey guys its rachel, i edited it cuz well it didnt make much sense ily tho lex