February twelfth. That's the day Sammy died. Today is the one year anniversary. I know something is wrong with me. I keep on thinking that I see Sammy, but then he just disappears. The boys keep on trying to help, but none of them understand. They can't sympathize with me on this. Oh my gosh, I'm a mess. Maybe it's just the realization that he's gone, but I feel so empty now. I'm not sure if the boys can get me out of this slump.
I had hoped for school work to distract me enough. Of course, Sammy never really left my mind. Not today. Although something else was taking a lot of my attention. Callie.
Callie normally sends me glares and attempts to flirt with Ollie, even though he harshly shot her down. Today, Callie's been distant. She hasn't spoken at all, and is in even more of a daze than I've been. Her eyes were filled with a look I have seen countless times before in my nightmares of losing my brother.
The look of somebody who's prepared to die.
At the end of school, which I had done no work in, Alex cuddled me like I would disappear if he didn't. I guess I didn't mind it. Having something real touch me kept me from fading away again.
The others all talked, trying to make a light and cheery conversation to cover up my gloomy mood while we waited for their parents. I wasn't exactly sure why they were coming to pick us up, but I get the feeling it has something to do with what day it is.
The talking stopped when a girl passing by looked up and screamed, pointing to the roof. We all looked, and there was Callie. She stood on the very edge, her plaid skirt swaying in the breeze with her red locks.
No. No way is this happening. I won't let it.
I broke away from the others, darting through the crowd and ignoring their pleading calls for me to come back. I couldn't let them keep me from this.
I stumble up the stairs to the school, and burst through the giant metal door, letting it slam into the wall and making the sound ring through the empty halls. Every student was outside, watching the scene on the roof. I made my way through the deserted halls, my mind filled with horrible thoughts of what could happen.
Callie could jump before I made it to her. She could refuse my offer and jump anyways. She could push me off the edge. Callie could even bring me down with her. So many things could happen—could take her life away. I wasn't about to let any of them happen, though.
I raced up towards the stairs, passing the gym with it's still-flickering lights. I heard the Art Man calling out to me, but blocked him out as I made my way into the stairwell. I took the steps two at a time as I rushed up. I heard the Art Man and other adults chasing me, their footsteps thundering in the stairwell so loud that not even my ringing ears could cover it.
My heart pounded in my chest, full of adrenaline. My breathing was ragged, and every step felt heavier with the growing need to get there sooner than I was going to.
I threw myself out the door to the roof, then quickly turned around and locked it. I had to do this alone, because she would surely jump before the adults tried to grab her and stop her.
"Stop! You don't have to do this Callie!" I yelled as my bully stood at the edge. "Please, don't do this, Callie! You have so much to live for!"
Callie looked back at me with tears falling down her face. "Says the girl who has it all! Parents who love her, brothers to look out for her, smarts, looks! I don't have that! I was held back twice, and I have to wear so much make up to look just somewhat-presentable! Not to mention my mom walked out on me and my dad yesterday!" She cried. "I don't even have a single friend!"
"You think I never suffered?" I asked. "My family is dead, my own mother killed them! I'm just as alone and hurt as you are, Callie! But I'm not trying to kill myself, I'm trying to do the opposite! I'm trying to live! Come down, Callie, let's get off the roof together. As friends." Tears streamed down my cheeks too. I walked to Callie slowly, and held out my hand, praying that she would take it.
I stared at Callie, keeping pity out of my eyes. There was nothing worse than the pity of others. Even if they understand, you don't feel like they do, and don't think they deserve to give you that look. It's the worst look anybody could ever give you.
"How do I know you won't just turn your back on me too?" She asked, stepping a bit closer to the edge. In my mind, I willed her not to move anymore. She looked so weak, so vulnerable. The same way I used to look. I'm stronger now, though, and I can help.
I laughed humorlessly at what she had said and shook my head. "That's the funny thing about life; you'll never know. Never be a hundred percent sure of anything. But, I am ninety-nine percent sure of this: sometimes taking a risk in life can lead to amazing things. Sure, sometimes those amazing things—well, sometimes they leave, but, there's still this chance that they won't. Please, take that risk. Take it with me; we'll do it together. Whatever happens, I'll stand by your side. Please just take my hand."
I was sobbing by now. I couldn't watch another person die and just stand by helplessly. Not again. I would protect her no matter what she did to me.
Callie looked at me with huge tears streaming her cheeks. Slowly, she nodded, and reached out for my hand. When a large gust of wind attacked us, Callie's foot slipped and she fell back. She shrieked and I jumped towards her. I landed on my stomach, a hand clasped tightly in mine. Callie, now dangling off of the roof, was sobbing and begging me not to let go.
"Callie! Callie, calm down!" I yelled, making her blubbering cries for me to help her stop. "I'm going to pull you up, okay. I've got you, it's going to be okay. Don't look down, alright?"
It was agonizingly slow how long I took to pull Callie up. With how little I've eaten and my lack of sleep, I'm not that strong. When I finally got her up, we stood there for a moment, watching each other. We were both in shock, and I was sure that Callie's life had just flashed before her eyes. Mine surely would have.
Callie stepped down from the ledge, then threw her arms around me and cried. We lowered ourselves to our knees and hugged, crying as the adults broke down the door. Even then, we still sobbed. The Art Man came over to the two of us and enveloped us in a warm hug. Then we let go completely. Every tear we had left came out in that moment.
After over an hour of crying we were taken off of the roof. Police officers carried both of us onto the safe ground. When we were put on our feet a man shot out of the crowd. He enveloped Callie in a hug and sobbed. She did too, crying out, "I'm sorry Daddy," over and over.
The Foster Man and The Foster Lady came rushing out and hugged me. "Quinn! Don't you ever scare us like that again!" The Foster Lady sobbed.
"Mom, Dad. I'm sorry," I sniffled. "I'm sorry I never called you that before, I'm sorry I ran off, I'm sorry for every time I got mad at you, I'm so sorry Mom and Dad!" I was sobbing again. They stared at me in shock for a moment before hugging me again.
"Quinn, we love you so much," Dad whispered as he kissed my head. "So, so much."
"It's all okay now, baby. We love you," Mom sobbed.
I wailed as the school crowded around us. My siblings all shot out of the crowd and joined the hug. After a while, I broke away from my family and walked over to Callie. I hugged her tightly and whispered, "I mean what I said. We're friends now, and we're taking the risk together. You'll give life a chance, and I will too. Fight to live like I have, and something amazing will happen. I promise, Callie, you'll see."
Callie nodded and hugged me tighter, whispering, "Thank you, Quinn. Something amazing already has happened, though. I have you as a friend."
After a few more minutes of the crowd being put under control, Callie and I were taken to an ambulance. We were sat down and wrapped in shock blankets. My eyelids were heavy, and drooped down. I let out a yawn as I slowly drifted off. Callie did the same.
When I woke up, I was in my bed. When did I get home? I wondered. The door creaked open, and Devin peaked his head in. He smiled at me, walking in and sitting beside me. Up close it was easy to see how red his eyes were.
"Quinn, how are you feeling? Does anything hurt?" He asked.
"No," I whispered. "I feel okay."
"Did you just," Devin looked down at me in complete shock.
"Yeah," I said with a grin. "No more being mute."
Tears slid down my brother's face as he hugged me. My bones were crushed, but I didn't care. "I'm so happy," he whispered. "Quinn, this is the best day of my life!"
"Devin," I sniffled. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry, big brother! I hurt you! I'm sorry! I won't be mute ever again!"
I started sobbing and clung to him like my life depended on it. Devin held me tighter and kissed my hair. We rocked back and forth for a while as we cried. The door opened and Mason came in, he watched us for a minute, nervousness spread across his face.
"M-Mason," I choked out hoarsely. "I'm sorry I didn't talk to you. I love you."
He sat beside us and joined the hug quickly. We sat and hugged until Alex, Chance, Nora, Camryn, and Leigh came in. They started freaking out, trying to get us to explain why we were crying. Alex lifted me into his arms and hugged me tighter than Devin. Camryn and the others hugged Devin and Mason while asking them what had happened.
"Guys, I'm sorry I went mute. I want to talk now; I want to talk to my family," I gushed. "I love you, and I'm sorry I didn't talk to you for so long. I wanted to, I swear. I-I—"
"Quinn, that's enough," Alex hushed. "We're so proud of you, kiddo. For calling us your family, for saying you love us, for talking. We're so proud of what you're doing right now, and we couldn't be any happier."
"I'm sorry," I sniffled. "I'm sorry!"
Everybody came over and hugged me. I was enveloped in the arms of my seven older siblings, and it was amazing. I finally felt whole again. I'll always miss Sammy, but I know he's watching over me from heaven. I know that he's happy for me, and glad that I've moved on.
"It's a sudden change for you to not be mute anymore. I like it," Camryn whispered after a bit of hugging. The others voiced their agreements.
I giggled and kissed my sister's wet, salty cheek. The others started looking at me sadly, and Alex set me down to go pout on my bed with everybody but Cam. I smiled, racing over to kiss their cheeks.
When I got to Mason, he grabbed me and refused to let go, making my smile widen. I shut my eyes and rested my head on his shoulder, earning an "awe" from the others. Mason just hugged me tighter while kissing my temple.
"You're going to eat and sleep too, right?" Mason asked hesitantly. I nodded into his shirt. "Good, 'cause you won't be skipping any meals for a long time. At least not until I'm off to college, and even then I'll make sure to call and check." I giggled and positioned myself to straddle Mason, my legs wrapping around his waist and my arms around his neck. I let out a soft sigh and relaxed into his arms.
"She still looks tired," Leigh whispered.
"I'd be tired too," Chance chuckled. "I mean, she is just finally sleeping after a year."
"She's cute when she sleeps," Devin cooed. "I wish she slept more before, just look at that little bed head."
I hid my face in Mason's shirt and blushed. My siblings laughed and each kissed the top of my head. They whispered goodnight before filing out, leaving just me, Camryn, and Mason.
"I thought you were going to jump, Quinn," Cam announced solemnly. Tears started trickling down her cheeks. "I was so scared that my little sister was going to die. I-I couldn't bare it."
"I'm sorry," I sniffled
"Not only that, but you were on the edge of a roof holding onto a girl for both of your lives," she continued. "I really thought I was going to loose you, Quinn. I thought my sister was dead."
"I'm sorry, Camy. It was something that I really had to do. I couldn't just stand there and be helpless again while somebody dies," I explained.
"I understand. Just give us a little warning next time, alright?" She asked with a small smile. I nodded and she gave me a feathery kiss to my forehead before leaving. Immediately, I tucked my head back into Mason's chest.
"I'll be staying with you the longest, Quinn. You'd better believe that I'm going to be the best big brother I can be," Mason assured. "And that means I'm always going to be by your side, I promise. Just please don't ever stop talking again. I can't stand to see you in so much pain again, there's just no way."
"I promise I won't," I said around a yawn. "No matter what."
Mason laid me down and pulled the covers on top of me. He kissed my forehead and whispered, "I'm glad. A voice like yours should never be silenced."