Chapter 48
“Open your eyes, Isabella,” he murmured softly, but still with that strange timbre of repressed feeling.
Immediately I opened my eyes and gasped, both hands flying up to cover my mouth in surprise.
On a winding stone pathway lined with stunning roses, fragrant lavender and freesia, with sweet honeysuckle climbing over a trellis arcing over a white-picket gate of the low white fence surrounding the lovely garden in which we stood, Edward knelt before me on one knee.
As soon as I had released his hands, he reached into his pocket and withdrew a small box.
My eyes widened with shock; I knew what had to be coming next, but somehow I still couldn’t wrap even this amazing vampire brain around the fact that this beautiful, perfect-for-me man was kneeling, smiling tremulously with nerves, a ring box in his hand.
Edward’s soothing voice was strong and sure despite the uncertainty lurking behind his beautiful eyes. Wrapping one of my hands in his large, free hand, he held it tightly as he spoke the words that would bring us truly together…forever.
“Isabella, I have loved you since the very moment I laid eyes upon you. Although you were human and incredibly fragile that first day at school, I admired your strength and fortitude more than I can express. My love for you has only grown since then, both while you were human and since you’ve become one of us. Nothing in the world would bring me more happiness than having you by my side for all eternity. Isabella, will you marry me?”
I couldn’t speak. If I were still human, I would have been a tearful mess. Looking into his earnest, hope-filled eyes, I knew that I wanted nothing and nobody else in this existence more than I wanted, needed, and loved Edward Cullen.
I nodded, my shy smile spreading across my face until it felt radiant.
“Really? You will become my wife, Isabella?” he asked again, almost as if he couldn’t believe his good fortune.
Still unable to speak, I nodded more emphatically.
Smiling tenderly at me, he gently opened the box to reveal a ring that could be either an engagement ring or a wedding band. It was deceptively simple: a rounded diamond set squarely in white gold, with two small square-set diamonds on each side, also in white gold. A yellow gold heart, the rounded edges touching the square diamonds, narrowed to a delicate yellow gold band. The diamonds were not large, but they were perfectly set into this modest, lovely design that seemed antique in design.
“This was my mother’s ring,” Edward said quietly. “It dates to the 1890s. If you don’t like it…if you would prefer something more modern or with bigger stones, we can go to Tiffany’s—“
“No,” I interrupted, finally willing myself to speak. “No, Edward. It’s perfect just as it is. I love it.” I smiled at him, my eyes misting for just a moment with the ghost of happy tears. “I love you.”
“As I love you,” Edward replied in a soft voice, his black eyes burning into mine with utter contentment as he slid the ring onto my finger, then pressed a kiss to the back of my hand.
My silent heart did a flip.
I swear it did. Seriously.
Gracefully Edward got to his feet, opening his arms wide as I flew into them. Laughing with sheer joy as we embraced, he spun me around in two perfect circles before gently setting me on my feet again.
Our eyes met, and it was as if someone had lit a fire of passion in us at exactly the same moment. Before the thought could even pass through my quick-as-lightning mind, Edward’s lips were hungrily moving against mine, and we both moaned softly as I opened my lips to his silent questing.
My hands were buried in the soft hair at the nape of his neck while he gathered me so close that if I were still human, I doubt I would have survived. But now I gloried in his joyfully fierce embrace as we kissed each other shamelessly.
And of course, the kiss was perfect. The heat rising from the friction of our cold lips could not compare to the fire blazing within us both.
A moment later, Edward backed me against something and made of stone that was even colder than he was, his lips continuing to devour mine and mine his. Only the sound of a quiet cracking noise broke the kiss…on Edward’s part at least.
At the sound, sanity seemed to return to him, and he straightened up slowly, kissing gently up my jawbone, along my hairline, and across my forehead, giving us both a chance to calm a little and re-engage speech.
“I’ll have to fix that,” Edward murmured, nodding toward the cracked river rock edifice between kisses.
“Fix what?” I asked dreamily, not really caring.
“The chimney.”
Puzzled, I pulled back from his gentle kisses. “Chimney?” I asked, confused.
Edward took me by both hands and pulled me back toward the little garden gate we had entered by. “Look,” he said, gesturing toward the small building in front of us.
A perfect little stone cottage, right out of a fairy tale, was somehow nestled here, right in the middle of the forest. Surrounded by a traditional white picket fence covered with clambering Cecil Bruner roses in the palest pink, with fragrant honeysuckle blooming white and golden over the arched entry, the garden surrounding the cottage was magical by itself. Foxgloves waved under the windows and against the stone walls, and ivy trailed up one side of the cottage and over part of the roof. In the center of the old-fashioned, English-style garden, the stone cottage looked as if it, too, had risen from the ground as part of the garden, growing there over the years.
“Whose house is this?” I breathed, continuing before he could reply. “You couldn’t have brought me to a more romantic spot if you had planned for months, Edward. It’s perfect.”
Edward reached into his pocket again and pulled out something that flashed in the pale moonlight. Dangling it in front of me for a moment, he pressed it into my palm. “It’s yours,” he whispered, his eyes bright with emotion.
“Mine? How?” I gasped.
“While you were…changing,” Edward’s voice choked a little over the last word, the memory of my suffering still difficult for him, “Esme, Alice, Rose, Emmett, Jasper, and even Carlisle from time to time, worked on this abandoned cottage for you…for us, really,” he finished shyly.
Edward stepped to the side, motioning me down the path toward the front door. “Would you like to explore, my love?” he invited.
With Edward on my heels, I slowly moved down the stone walkway, stepping up the three low stairs onto the narrow stone-flagged porch. Carefully I inserted the old-fashioned brass key into the lock of the dark red wooden door, noting the graceful arched top set with a half-moon of lacy glass.
Before I turned the lock, I smiled mischievously at the beautiful man by my side, his eyes alight with anticipation. “It looks like a hobbit-house,” I whispered with a smirk.
Throwing back his head, Edward laughed, and I joined in the joyous sound that echoed through the garden and around the little cottage. “Emmett said that you’d say that,” he managed to gasp as our laughter subsided.
Turning the lock and hearing the satisfying “click” that meant we could enter, I pushed gently against the antiqued brass door handle which seemed Victorian in design. As the door swung open almost silently, I was glad that, as a vampire, I needed no light to view every detail of the lovely little cottage.
A quick movement at my side surprised me as Edward scooped me into his arms before stepping over the threshold. “We’re not married yet,” I giggled at him, and his joyful eyes met mine.
“But we will be. Soon.”
“Soon?” I asked quietly, perfectly serious for the moment.
He nodded. “Soon,” he assured me as he set me down on the polished oak floors of the cottage.
Our cottage.
Although the great room wasn’t large, it possessed a homey, cozy feel that I recognized as Esme’s esthetic in décor. A padded leather chair and a faded red-and-white flowered chintz armchair sat at angles to each other in front of the river rock fireplace; the rough-hewn mantel above was scattered with hurricane lamps, pale candles in a three-tiered iron candelabra, china teapots, and in the center, an antique Seth Thomas mantel clock that chimed the hour as we entered the room. Above the mantel on the natural pine walls hung an assortment of mismatched antique china plates in various shades of green, blue, and red.
Small tables stacked with books and candles were tucked into various nooks, two tall oak bookcases filled with lovely old volumes that Alice and Jasper had apparently sneaked from Edward’s room when we were away hunting. An antique freestanding globe on a brass pedestal stood in the corner, and the three windows of old-fashioned mullioned glass graced the far wall.
The center window contained stained glass in a lovely Tiffany-inspired pattern of a grape arbor at sunset with hollyhocks and red roses in the foreground and rolling Tuscan hills in the background. The red, greens, and golds of the stained glass added a sense of warmth and classical beauty to the room.
A few paintings of natural subjects hung on the walls, but they were small and simple enough not to detract from the masterpiece of the stained glass window. One larger painting even matched the window thematically—a bunch of grapes that looked too real to be merely painted on canvas. Antique maps were framed beside the door, and a hand-embroidered sampler that was obviously quite old, the formerly white material yellowed to a pale cream by the years, the red stitching perfect as the alphabet and numerals one through ten were embroidered in almost-perfectly upright printing below the stunningly-stitched calligraphy of a verse of Scripture, followed by a name and date:
“’Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning. Of his own will begat he us with the word of truth, that we should be a kind of firstfruits of his creatures.’
The First Chapter of the General Epistle of Saint James, verses seventeen and eighteen.
Elizabeth Anne Bentley March 2, 1888”
I was speechless. My eyes flew to Edward, and he nodded minutely. Finally I forced out the two words: “You mother’s?”
Smiling slightly but with pain behind his eyes, he nodded again.
“Wow,” I breathed. Words couldn’t express how amazing it was to not only see a sampler stitched by Edward’s mother when she was a girl but to have it framed in antique brass and hung on the wall of our cottage.
I continued through the room, touching a china teacup here, a beeswax candle there. Smiling gently, Edward watched me discover it all, one element at a time, as my fingers brushed an old Singer treadle sewing machine which doubled as a table between the two bookcases, a painting of an English castle hanging above it. In the back corner, an overstuffed loveseat upholstered in red velvet and decorated with throw pillows of contrasting colors would make a lovely place to read…if one didn’t automatically gravitate to the two cozy chairs in front of the fireplace.
“Electricity”? I asked quietly.
Edward looked uncomfortable for the first time. “No. I-I thought that we would prefer roughing it out here; we can always return to the house to watch TV or use the computers.” He peered down at me nervously. “Did I make the right decision? We can always add—“
“Yes,” I interrupted him smoothly. “It’s perfect. I’ve always wanted a place away from technology, with a fireplace for heat and candles for light.”
“So, do you like it?” Edward asked, excitement bright in his eyes.
“I adore it,” I smiled, reaching up on my tiptoes to kiss his nose. “It’s really, truly, perfect, Edward. I can’t believe what you all have done.”
Smiling in relief, Edward led me back to the other room behind the front one: a bedroom. The walls here were painted a sky-blue with white crown molding lining the ceiling which was a deeper shade of blue. Angled from the corner, the antique white iron four-poster bed was topped with a blue-and-white quilt, a deep blue hand-crocheted afghan folded across the end and white eyelet pillows piled in decadence against the headboard. Several white-painted armoires contained our clothing…which surprised me a little.
Edward immediately caught the drift of my thoughts from my bemused expression. “Alice wanted to add a closet larger than the entire house, but Esme and I conspired against her with the promise to convert one of our bedrooms in the big house to a walk-in closet for us there; we can have just the essentials here.”
Grinning, I asked, “How did you manage to convince Alice to be so…practical?”
Edward shook his head in mock horror. “It wasn’t easy. I had to promise her just about everything but our firstborn,” he joked. But then his expression changed from humor to sadness in an instant.
“What is it?” I whispered, immediately concerned. Gently I took Edward’s hand and led him to a lovely pale pine chest at the end of the bed where we seated ourselves.
Cupping my face in his large hands, he looked down on me, the emotions flitting through his eyes a mixture of sorrow, joy, and regret.
“Edward?” I prodded gently.
Closing his eyes, he pressed a chaste kiss to my forehead, then pulled back to watch my eyes. “I hate that I’ve taken that away from you as well,” he whispered with a rawness that showed the depth of his pain.
I didn’t get it. What had Edward “taken away” from me? My perfect memory rapidly replayed our conversation, and then the light dawned.
Edward almost cringed away from me when my expression revealed that I finally understood the source of his worry.
“Did you want children?” I asked him quietly, my eyes fixed on his as we tried to read one anothers’ expression as well as words and tone.
“I never thought about it,” he sighed. “When I was still human, I was too wrapped up in becoming a soldier, serving my country with distinction and valor. I was incredibly shy around girls; most of them probably thought I was not worth the trouble to get to know.” His words were not bitter, just matter-of-fact, resigned.
“The thought of children never occurred to me until a lovely brunette, who did not—and still does not—understand the extent of her beauty, entered my existence. But by that point, I was what I am, and children are not possible among our kind.”
Edward paused, then I caught the regret in his tone as he continued in a slightly harder voice, “I am so sorry, Isabella. I should have considered the repercussions of your change more deeply at the time. I should have found out before the attack about your wishes regarding becoming one of us. I’ve now condemned you to a childless existence, and you had no choice. I am…so sorry,” he choked out the last words. Gently he nudged me aside to stride to a large open window graced with sheer white drapes, averting his face from the scrutiny of my gaze.
Considering the best way to approach him for a moment, I slowly got to my feet and joined him at the window, enjoying the fragrant breeze on my face and as it fluttered the delicate window dressings. Clasping his hands in mine, I brought them to my lips and kissed his clenched fists, my eyes fixed on his anguished expression.
Edward needed to know the truth.
My truth.
“I am not sorry, Edward. Not in the least. First of all, you saved my life…or my existence, if you want to be technical. No, there wasn’t time to ask me about my preferences, but if there had been time to discuss my change, I would have begged you to go ahead and change me.”
His relieved sigh brought a slight smile to my face as I continued. “And having children? After all I’ve been through, I have no desire to have children. Yes, my childhood was lovely until the death of my mother. But then the death of my father left me alone in the world—no grandparents living, and with both of my parents being only children, too, I had no aunts, uncles, or cousins, either. The Blacks were the closest thing to a family I had, and they took me in gladly…at first. But with Sarah’s death, everything went to hell very quickly. In good conscience, I couldn’t bring a child into a world like this, Edward.”
My voice dropped to a whisper as I continued, “In this world, hatred and evil seem to triumph far too often. You and I—we love one another absolutely and completely, yes—but even if we were both human and we had that possibility, I would struggle with the idea of having kids. So, to tell the truth, as much as I adore you, I can’t see myself having a child.”
A long moment passed while he fully comprehended my words. Then a tiny smile graced his full lips. “Really?” he asked, his expression hopeful but tentative.
“Really,” I whispered, bringing his hands to my lips again and kissing his palms this time, one then the other, my eyes not leaving his. I could feel passion thrumming between us deliciously.
Apparently to gauge the truth of my words, Edward gazed into my eyes for a long moment, and then, so quickly that even my vampiric senses couldn’t keep up, he yanked me against his long body and lowered his head to kiss me passionately.
My arms reached around his neck as I pulled myself against his hard form, even harder in some intriguing places. The energy between us built as we hungrily consumed each others’ lips, and without protest I parted my lips to welcome his questing tongue.
Low growls emanated from both of our chests as we kissed, his large hands ghosting gently down my back, pressing my body even more intimately against his. My hands moved across his broad shoulders beneath his button-down shirt, then down his powerful upper arms to his bare forearms where he had rolled back his long sleeves. The electricity between us hummed as the kiss continued.
Conscious thought was far from my mind as his lips consumed mine, and I began to edge him toward the beautiful bed so near us. When the backs of his legs touched the mattress, I gave Edward a gentle push, landing him on his back, crosswise across the bed. Propping himself on his elbows, he grinned at me sexily, and I returned his smile as I stepped between his open legs and crawled up his delicious form like a predator, kissing him teasingly.
A fraction of a second later, I was lying on my back, my head resting on the white eyelet pillows with Edward’s body atop mine, his weight balanced on his forearms, our lips extremely busy, my arms twined around his neck, holding him snugly against me.
Then Edward groaned loudly. We both broke the kiss, myself in curiosity, he in frustration.
“What is it?” I asked, concerned.
“Eleazar,” he hissed. “We were supposed to return within an hour, remember?”
I smiled seductively. “Somehow this supposedly perfect vampire memory becomes short-circuited when you kiss me,” I teased.
He laughed softly, leaning down to press one last kiss to my lips before gracefully standing beside the bed, offering me a gentlemanly but unnecessary hand to assist me to my feet. Sighing, I allowed Edward to help me up. Together we looked around the lovely bedroom before reluctantly leaving our perfect cottage behind and returned, hand in hand, to what we now called “the big house.”
Eleazar was waiting for us on the back deck. When he saw us leaping the river holding hands, he smiled, apparently amused by our rather long “break”…which I couldn’t help wishing had been just a little (or a lot) longer, for several reasons….
As one, we whisked up the back stairs and joined Eleazar just as the rest of the Cullens—the rest of my family—streamed out of the back door, shooting questions at Edward and me.
“So, how did you like the cottage?”
“Did you like the river rock? We used a local supplier when we designed the fireplace.”
“Do you like the bedroom colors? You do like blue, don’t you? Alice insisted on purple, but I didn’t think—“
“Is the place still standing?”
This last question from Emmett stunned the whole group for a split second before everyone except Edward and I broke into raucous laughter. Edward squeezed my hand as we exchanged a rueful glance.
“Shall we tell them?” Edward asked me, more to tease his family members than to truly inquire regarding our news.
All eyes were on us immediately. “News?” asked Alice excitedly, and I smiled smugly. Anything related to me was off limits to our resident psychic, so Edward had been able to keep his proposal plans a complete secret.
Edward wrapped an arm around my shoulders, holding me close and whispering in my ear, “Show them.”
Without a word I extended my left hand, my ring glittering in the well-lit room.
Alice’s squeal of delight was nearly deafening; Emmett and Jasper covered their ears while the rest of us laughed. Then Edward and I were passed around the circle of family members to be congratulated, kissed, hugged, and generally made a fuss over.
While I was being hugged by Rosalie, I glanced back at Edward; he was smiling at me, his eyes alight with joy. His obvious happiness warmed my heart—seeing him so different from the melancholy, brooding boy he was when I first met him made me just as happy as he looked.
“I hate to break up the celebration,” Eleazar finally said, “but I really need to work with Bella for a while.” He sighed. “I don’t usually get strong impulses regarding something, but I am feeling that training Bella is urgent and needs to be done as soon as possible.”
It was amazing how quickly the joyous emotions in the room could dissipate. Edward was frowning at Eleazar, and Carlisle looked worried. Jasper’s eyes were wary as he took in the emotional climate of the family.
“Certainly,” I said quietly, moving toward Eleazar. I was not surprised when Edward shadowed me, taking my hand as we followed Eleazar outside, the rest of the family apparently backing off to let us get to it…whatever “it” might be.
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A/N: Thanks for reading!! I had planned to update this story on Friday—had it ready to go with everything but the author’s note, but Thursday night we had a power outage which fried our wifi modem. And it won’t be fixed until Monday at 5:00 PM. So I had to drive 15 miles to Starbucks to be able to update this story for you all.
With my weird grading schedule and NaNoWriMo (I’m drafting Chapter 51 now), I’m planning to update next Friday…after seeing Breaking Dawn Part 2 with my daughter at the Friday early matinee. I have final research papers coming in Friday and a week to grade and return them to the students, so I’ll be busy.
Thank you for all of your wonderful votes and comments!!! I loved them all!! Your relief over Bella’s return was lovely to behold. ;) Thank you!!! :D
However, I was more foolish than usual in attempting NaNoWriMo with so many essays to grade this month, but I guess that anything I write is to the good, even if I don’t completely finish all 50,000 words. My real goal is to complete a first draft of all of PbF.
Also, I posted photos of the stained glass window, the painting of the grapes, the cottage, and the stone fireplace on my blog:
http://cassandralowery.blogspot.com/2012/11/photos-to-accompany-pbf-chapter-48.html
Have a wonderful week, everyone!!
~Cassandra xxxooo :D