Lisa tried to pull the crying Jennie out of the courtroom.
Her shoulder was pretty much drenched by now since Jennie had been crying non‐stop for more than fifteen minutes.
Lisa sat down on one of the benches, pulling Jennie with her.
She sighed and leaned back against the wall, not even sure what to say or do. She had gone beyond numb. Her brain had stopped working. She was staring blankly at the wall in front of her with her arms around Jennie. Everything felt so surreal. Like a dream. A very bad dream.
Jisoo and Yeri sat on each end of the bench, watching their friends in despair.
Jennie finally lifted her head from Lisa's wet shoulder and saw Aesook approaching them.
She stood up and lunged forward. She would have attacked the woman if it weren't for Yeri's fast reflexes that held her back by the arms.
"You had your chance and you threw it away! You didn't even want him! And now you're taking him away from us?! We love him! He's OUR son! We raised him!"
"Nini..." Lisa snapped out of her daze and stood up, holding the crying Jennie.
Yeri slowly let go and stepped back.
"Do you know that he even had problems speaking because he was depressed? A two year old! Depressed! Because his mother abandoned him! People thought he was mute! Nobody wanted him but we do! We love him! I love him!"
Lisa finally felt tears brimming in her eyes at hearing Jennie's words. The numbness started to recede and all she could feel was pain.
"Where were you?! Huh?!" Jennie didn't stop. "Five years later and you come waltzing in here, ripping him away from the home and the people he knows and loves just because you happen to feel sorry?!"
Aesook flinched and kept her head down, "I‐I'm sorry." She really didn't know what else to say.
"Bullshit!"
"Jen!"
"If she's really sorry then she wouldn't have done this!" Jennie told Lisa. "What the heck is wrong with meeting halfway? Doing this together? We're willing so why aren't you?" She was addressing the woman again, pointing at her. "Why do you have to be so selfish?!"
Lisa took a deep breath. "Jennie, let's go home. We'll talk about this later."
Lisa pulled Jennie away, making sure that they kept a safe distance from Aesook as they walked past her.
Lisa called the driver and told him to hurry.
She then half dragged Jennie inside the car without even saying goodbye to her friends.
The ride back home was quiet except for the sobs and random rants from Jennie.
Lisa didn't say a word, silently breaking on the inside.
She finally remembered something and took one hand off Jennie's back and dialed a number on her phone.
"Omoni? It's Lisa. Can you help pick up Inho and Heeryung from school today? Sorry it's such short notice. We'll come by the house and get them later." She paused to listen to the reply. "N-no, everything's fine. The court's taking a bit long, that's all. Yes, Omoni. Don't worry. Yes, we'll see you later. Thank you." She hung up and clutched the phone.
"Geunshin?"
"Yes, Miss Manoban?" The driver looked at her from the rearview mirror. His eyes clearly showed concern.
"Take us straight home, please."
"Yes, Miss Manoban."
Lisa silently sighed and kissed the top of Jennie's head. "We'll get through this, Nini... somehow..." She tightened her arms around Jennie.
-‐-‐-‐-‐
"Nini..." Lisa approached the woman lying on the small bed, clutching the blue Thomas blanket and sniffing the pillow. Lisa tried to make Jennie sit up. "Here, drink. I know you must be thirsty." She offered Jennie the glass of water.
Jennie didn't move.
Lisa set the glass down on the small nightstand and lay down next to Jennie. "We still have visitation rights. We can go see him every weekend." She kissed Jennie's forehead and stroked her hair gently.
"It's not the same."
"I know but it's better than nothing." Lisa quietly observed Jennie's swollen face for a few more minutes. "I think I'll go get some fresh air and then pick them up. You stay here and rest." She kissed Jennie's forehead and moved to leave.
Jennie grabbed Lisa's wrist just as the latter was about to stand up.
Lisa turned to see the sad eyes and sighed. She lay back down and kissed Jennie lightly. "I'll be back soon." She gently brushed Jennie's cheek with the back of her fingers. "I love you. We'll get through this somehow. Together. With Heeryung too." She tried to smile. "I'll be back." She pecked Jennie's cheek and got up.
Lisa grabbed the car keys from the table near the door and walked out of the house.
She got inside the car and closed the door.
The silence of the small space quadrupled the empty feeling in her heart. It suffocated her. She felt everything closing in on her and quickly pushed the door open to get out, panting.
Lisa slammed the door shut with all her strength and kicked it with the base of her foot, letting out a loud frustrated curse. Her voice howled and echoed through the street, making some passersby turn their heads in surprise.
She leaned on the car and sobbed, unable to hold it in any longer.
Her legs gave way and she slouched down onto the pavement, hugging her knees and crying her heart out.
-‐-‐-‐-‐
Jennie didn't want to answer the ringing phone but since it didn't seem to stop, she finally pushed herself off the bed and went to her room to get it.
She saw the name on the screen and frowned. She answered the call. "Mom?"
"Hi, Jennie-yah, are you back from court?"
"Yes. Why?"
"When are you going to pick them up? Can they have dinner here or do you want them to have dinner at home?"
"W‐what?" Jennie looked at the clock and although she didn't know exactly when Lisa had left the house, she knew that it certainly had been more than an hour. "Lisa hasn't arrived?"
"Um... no. Is she on her way?"
"She left at least an hour ago." Jennie started to worry.
"Oh? That's strange. Maybe she had to go somewhere first or got stuck in traffic."
"Maybe." Jennie was pretty sure that that wasn't it though. "They can have dinner there, Mom. I'll call Lisa and see where she is."
"Okay then. Take your time."
"Bye."
Jennie quickly hung up and dialed Lisa's number. She heard the distant sound of the default ringtone and walked out of the room in search of the source. She went downstairs and finally found the phone on the table near the door. She sighed and ended the call.
Jennie went back upstairs to get her bag and decided to go out and search for Lisa. Her gut feeling told her that Lisa was not okay and she was growing more worried by the minute.
She grabbed the keys to her car and pulled the door open.
Jennie stepped out of the house to see Lisa's car still parked out front. She then saw the person sitting on the pavement, legs stretched out.
Lisa was leaning against the dented car door while staring blankly down at her hands.
"Lili!"
Jennie rushed to Lisa's side and kneeled down to see the red and swollen eyes. She quickly pulled Lisa and hugged her. "You've been sitting out here all this time?"
Lisa said nothing.
"Lili, say something!" Jennie shook Lisa's shoulders.
Lisa looked up at Jennie. "How did this happen?"
"Sigh... I don't know." Jennie brushed Lisa's bangs aside. "But like you said, we'll pull through somehow."
Lisa let Jennie hold her for a few more minutes.
"What did you do to the car?" Jennie finally asked.
"Huh?"
"This." Jennie pointed at the dent.
"Oh. Must've kicked it harder than I thought."
Jennie sighed. "You have to stop trying to look strong, Lili. I don't want you shouldering everything alone, keeping things bottled up inside then exploding like this. You always say that we're in this together. Let me share your pain." Jennie leaned her forehead against Lisa and held the sides of her face. "Please?"
"I..." Lisa gulped.
"You're human and humans have limits. That's why we have other people. That's why you have me. I'm grateful that you always try to be strong for me and for this family but you don't have to be that way all the time." Jennie gently kissed Lisa.
"I made a promise to take care of you when I asked you to marry me."
"Yes but that doesn't mean that you have to turn into a superwoman." Jennie smiled. "I'm glad that you love me and them so much that you're willing to do anything for us. But again, Lisa, you're just human. It's okay to rant, cry, rage and be vulnerable with me. We can rage and cry together." She chuckled. "Give me a chance to take care of you too. I want to do this together. We're in this together. You and me."
Lisa smiled. "And the little monsters."
"Yep, and the little monsters." Jennie's smile faded a bit at the mention of the little ones. "What are we going to tell them?" Jennie let go of Lisa and sat down next to her, holding Lisa's hand.
"The truth." Lisa took a deep breath and laced their fingers together.
"Tonight?"
Lisa shook her head. "I'll talk to Jisoo first tomorrow. We still have a few weeks. Let's just try to make the best of it." She leaned her head on Jennie's shoulder. "If anyone asks, just tell them that the car got randomly dented in a parking lot or something."
Jennie chuckled. "They won't believe the truth anyway."
"Why?" Lisa lifted her head and looked at Jennie. "I'm strong!"
"Yeah, sure." Jennie scoffed. "You can't even put the head back on a Barbie doll."
"The hole on that head was weirdly shaped, okay?"
"Then how come Jisoo could do it?"
"Because she's weirdly shaped too." Lisa grinned.
Jennie laughed. "This is so random."
Lisa stared at Jennie. "I'm glad I have you here with me."
"Glad to be here." Jennie pecked Lisa's lips. "Thank you for always trying to protect me and look out for me."
Lisa shrugged. "I have to. You could get snatched away easily since people never stop asking for your name and number. We should get you a 'Property of Lalisa Manoban' tattoo on your forehead or something." Lisa playfully poked Jennie's forehead. "'The Mother of Lalisa Manoban's Children' sounds pretty good too."
"Dork." Jennie punched Lisa's arm with her other hand.
A sudden low growl made them both laugh.
"I think I'm hungry," Lisa said.
"Let's go to Mom's and eat." Jennie stood up, pulling Lisa with her. She checked the front door of the house one last time before getting into the car.
-‐-‐-‐-‐
"Hi everyone." Jennie walked into the dining room and greeted her mother before kissing Heeryung's cheek. She then took a seat next to Inho, kissed his cheek and tried to hug him.
The boy resisted, trying to finish his ice cream, so Jennie let him go.
Lisa walked in soon after, greeting Jennie's mother and ruffled Inho's hair before sitting next to Heeryung, stealing a piece of Oreo from the girl's bowl.
"Umma!" Heeryung pouted.
Lisa grinned. "Umma's hungry. Please kindly share your food."
"Where have you been?" Jennie's mother asked Lisa.
"I'm sorry for being held up, Omoni. I had a little incident with the car but nothing severe," Lisa said, glancing at the boy across the table.
The woman saw the look. She raised her eyebrows, giving Lisa a questioning look.
Lisa sighed and shook her head. "Bad luck, Omoni."
The woman stopped chewing her dessert and set her spoon down. She leaned back and took a deep breath.
The butler came bringing Lisa and Jennie's meal.
"Thanks, Ahjussi," Lisa said.
"Have you finished your homework, Ryung-ah?" Jennie asked.
The girl nodded. "Grandma helped."
"Good girl. Go on then, take Inho and go watch TV or a DVD or something."
"Okay."
The kids left the table and the oldest of the three women watched them until they had disappeared around the corner. "We lost?"
Jennie nodded.
Lisa quietly chewed her food.
"But we still have visitation rights so it's not like we'll totally lose him," Jennie tried to reason but her voice shook.
Lisa looked up.
Jennie's mother sighed and patted Jennie's arm. "How much time left?"
"A few weeks. We need to get him familiarized with his mo‐... that woman." Jennie clenched her jaws. She lost her appetite and set her fork down.
Lisa stopped eating as well. "I'm going to get some ice cream. Do you want some, Nini?"
Jennie shrugged. "Sure. Why not."
Lisa excused herself and left the dining room.
"How are you holding up?" The older woman asked Jennie.
Jennie sighed. "I don't know. I can't think or feel anything right now."
"Sorry." The woman stood up and hugged her daughter.
"I'm fine, Mom. At least Lisa and Heeryung are still here."
The woman let go. "I would have never thought I'd say this but I'm glad you married her." She sat back down in her seat.
Jennie smiled. "Finally done resenting her now?"
Jennie's mother merely shrugged. "I haven't resented her in months."
Jennie laughed. "I've noticed. So you won't even mind coming to the house once in a while?"
"To babysit?"
"Not necessarily. Just hangout, play with the kids, relax... like Dad does."
The woman sipped her drink. "We'll see."
Well, at least there's a small silver lining to this dark cloud, Jennie smiled to herself.
-‐-‐-‐-‐
"Ready?" Lisa's head popped up at the doorway.
Jennie finished combing the boy's hair. "Almost." She grabbed a pair of socks from the drawer and told the boy to sit down. "Here," she squatted down and handed him one sock. "Since you're a big boy now, how about trying to put this on by yourself?"
The boy nodded and took hold of the sock.
"This part goes here," Jennie pointed at the sock heel and then at Inho's right heel. "So it must be at the bottom." She fixed the boy's hold on the sock. "Now put your foot in... yep, just like that. Now pull it up," she helped pull the small sock up. "And there you go. Smart boy!" She smiled and kissed his cheek.
"One more!" The boy pointed at the sock Jennie was still holding.
Jennie chuckled and gave it to him.
His brows creased as he tried to repeat what he had just done, struggling to reach his foot with his short arms.
Lisa grinned at the cute yet serious face.
"Done!" He proudly lifted his left foot.
"Good job!" Jennie fixed the sock, turning it a bit so it fits better. "Such a big boy." She hugged him, trying to hold back her tears. She gulped and let go. "Now let's get your shoes on." She stood up and took hold of his hand, leading him out of the room.
"Nice job, Inho‐yah." Lisa pinched his cheek as he walked past her.
"Is Heeryung ready?" Jennie asked.
Lisa sighed.
"She still won't get ready?"
"Nope. You wanna try talking to her? She won't listen to me."
"Sure." Jennie handed Inho over to Lisa. "Don't forget to pack his snack."
"Okay." Lisa swung the small hand. "Let's go pack your snack! Which juice do you want today? Orange? Grape? Gasp! Apple?!"
"Chocolate!"
Lisa laughed out loud. "There's no chocolate juice, Inho."
The two chatted away, making their way down to the kitchen.
Jennie smiled then sighed at the sight. She composed herself before she headed to the closed door and knocked.
"Ryung‐ah, can I come in?" She pushed the door open a bit and peeked inside.
The girl on the bed didn't answer.
Jennie saw Heeryung hugging her teddy bear and staring at what looked like one of her Barbies perched on one of Inho's toy trains.
Jennie had to smile. "What is that?" She sat down on the bed.
"If I let Inho play with all my Barbies, can he stay?"
Jennie swallowed the lump in her throat. "It's not up to him or us, Ryung‐ah. I'm sorry." She sighed, "I don't want him to go either but his umma-‐..."
"I hate her."
"Hey! What did we tell you about using that word?"
"I don't care."
"Ryung-ah..." Jennie moved the toys aside and pulled the girl close. "Let's say you lost your Barbie and someone found it but that person didn't know you so he couldn't return it to you. Then one day you saw that person with it and you want the Barbie back. Do you think that person should give it to you?"
"Of course! It's mine!"
Jennie smiled bitterly. "It's like that with Inho's umma. She wants to take care of Inho now so we have to let her do that."
"But if that person really wants my Barbie, he could keep it. I can just ask you to buy me a new one, right?"
Jennie chuckled. "You're too smart. Yes, if it's a toy then it's easier to just get a new one. But your brother is not a toy, Ryung-ah. We can't just replace him now, can we?"
The young girl frowned as she tried her best to understand the situation.
"Besides, we can still go see him during the weekends." Jennie stroked the girl's soft hair gently.
"Who will I play with?" The girl looked up with earnest eyes and it made Jennie gulp.
"Me or Umma? There's always Grandpa and Grandma and your aunties too." The girl looked at the blue plastic train and sniffed.
Jennie hugged the young girl quietly. "Sorry, Ryung‐ah. We tried. We really tried." She fought to hold back her tears.
Jennie let go of the girl after a while. "Please go get ready?"
"Why do I have to come along? I don't want to see her."
Jennie sighed. "To help your brother, Ryung-ah. It will not be easy for him so he needs his noona to help him. Please?"
"For Inho?"
Jennie nodded. "Yep. For Inho."
The girl took a few more seconds before she slowly let go of the teddy bear and took hold of the train. "Here," she gave it to Jennie. "That's Gordon. Inho will need it to race Thomas."
Jennie smiled. "Thanks," she kissed the girl's cheek. "Come downstairs when you're ready?" A trickle of tears escaped her eyes. She quickly wiped it away.
The girl nodded. "Don't cry, Mommy."
"I won't," she hugged her again. Don't you ever leave me too, Ryung‐ah.