it was the night of mckays party and i was making the finishing touches to my makeup.
there was a slight knock at the door, a unique knock belonging to a unique man, my dad.
"you looking stunning my love, so innocent yet so fierce" he said before sitting on my bed.
"dad shut up" i said with a slight chuckle as i rolled my eyes.
i'm not a dick. he does this every time i get properly dressed up to go out. any moment now we're about to get a speech about staying safe and "not letting some fucking man slut force me into doing something i'm not comfortable with".
i appreciate his concern but i did do 5th grade and have heard numerous safety talks about every topic under the sun.
"now i know you're a mature young lady".
this man just dropped the "mature young lady card". the speech is starting.
"but just be careful tonight, and i know nothings happened to you before but tonight could be different, in america alone..."
i zoned out, i love my dad with my whole heart but to be quite frank, i couldn't give two fucks about what he's saying.
"mia... mia, did you hear me?"
i zoned back in "yeah totally i'll watch my back and besides i'll be with cassie the whole night".
nice way of deceiving your parents that one, always say a friend your parents like is gonna be there.
"i better go cassie will be waiting for me" i said whilst adjusting the straps of my heels.
my dad kissed the top of my head "ok again be careful, don't go fucking wild".
i chuckled "of course dad, i love you" i said as i made my way downstairs and out of my room.
i lit a cigarette as i made my way down the street towards cassies house so we could make our way to mckays together.
"don't go fucking wild" uh sorry dad but this is the first party in forever i've not been 'working' at, i'm gonna have a fucking good time tonight.
<33
me and cassie arrived at mckays and it was the perfect atmosphere, it wasn't too wild that the cops would be at the door any minute but it wasn't totally dead.
"i'm gonna find mckay see you in a bit" she said before kissing me on the cheek.
i smiled "go get him hun".
i was making my way to the kitchen to get a drink when i saw maddy.
i smiled but she just rolled her eyes and walked by me as if i was invisible.
i wasn't surprised. she'd hated me ever since me and nate hooked up at a party when they were on a break, i don't even like nate.
but maddy held a grudge against me and i didn't give enough of a shit to fix it so it's been like that ever since between us, which was fine by me.
i got to the kitchen and started to take some vodka shots and i was determined to finish the night how i started it: full of strong alcohol and good times.
it did not last long.
as a shock to absolutely fucking nobody, the nights a bit blurry but i'll tell you what i can remember.
i was heading to get my millionth drink of the night when i heard shouting from the kitchen.
it was nate losing his shit telling everyone to get out of the kitchen.
the only people that remained in the kitchen was nate and this girl i didn't recognised.
"who the fuck are you" nate raised his voice at the girl.
"i- i'm jules" the girl muttered, obviously shaken up.
"who do you even know here" he asked her "hey does anyone know who the fuck jules is" he addressed the now small crowd outside the kitchen.
no one dared say anything, apart from the few whispers amongst the crowd, even if they did know jules they'd have to be fucking brain dead to say anything now.
nate started hollering more abuse towards jules and i'd had enough.
"ok nate that's enough leave her alone" i said approaching the two of them in the kitchen.
"fuck off mia" he muttered.
"just fucking lay off her, she's done nothing wrong" i rolled my eyes at him.
"you know what, when your parents get jobs that doesn't involved breaking the fucking law i might listen to what you've got to say".
i scoffed "you know what nate, you've got serious fucking anger issues and you take it out on everyone else well guess what nate" i stepped closer to him "you're not the only person on planet earth with fucking daddy issues" i started to walk away, bored shitless of this.
"yeah that's it walk about you fucking whore" he shouted.
i laughed and turned around "oh i'm the fucking whore" i chuckled know the bomb i'm about to drop on nates whole world "you know your precious little maddy, she's being fucked in the pool with some random guy".
he just stared, the most blank stare i'd ever seen.
"go on nate" i paused as i pointed in the direction of the pool "go get your little whore".
he stormed past the crowd and shoved me out the way making his way to the pool.
i chuckled before making my way out to the garden for some fresh air.
i saw fez sitting on the couch smoking a joint.
"can i join you" i said as i walked over to him.
"yeah bruh" he replied, evidently high as shit.
i slumped myself down beside him with a sigh.
"rough night" he asked as he handed me the joint.
i took the joint from him "apart from the bust up i just had with nate jacobs pretty quiet actually" i took a drag of the joint "how's your night been".
"fucking lit bruh this is some good fucking shit" he said chuckling.
i smiled "yeah our suppliers branching out" i pointed at the joint "it's kinda like a trial run".
"hey you seen rue anywhere, i'm kinda worried about her after the conversation we had" he asked me.
"nah bro sorry, are you good you seem like somethings on your mind" i said turning to face him.
"it's just since she's came outta rehab man she don't wanna stay clean and i'm scared incase she hurts herself again" he shook his head at himself.
"and you feel like it's your fault because you're the one that sold her drugs in the first place".
i sighed as i lay my hand on his wrist "you're a good person fez, if she don't wanna get clean she don't wanna get clean but the only thing you can do is be there for her".
"yeah i know but it still fucks with my head you know".
i nodded my head in agreement "yeah i know, i'm always here if you wanna talk or shit".
he smiled "thanks mia, you're a good one".
i smiled at him.
"so what you gonna do now" he asked me.
i sighed "idk i'm probably just gonna find cassie and go home, tonight's been a bit of a head fuck".
i got up and turned to face fez "see you around" i smiled.
he smiled back "yeah see you".
i went to call cassie to see when she was but as i opened my phone i got a text from her:
cass<3
spending the night with mckay, don't wait up for me x
i sighed slightly before making my way through the crowd towards the back door.
i made my way home in a pretty shit mood to be honest, this night was not what it was suppose to be.
i've said it before and i'll say it again, nate jacobs is a dick.
you know what, i'm not even gonna waste my time thinking about that prick, he's not fucking worth it.
it was 2am, i was stumbling home with a cigarette in my left hand and my shoes in my right hand.
i didn't really know how i was feeling but i knew what i wanted: i just wanted home.