I had a lot to explain to my former colleagues when I went to the Secretary Lounge, looking for my coat. I think they kind of learned how to approach me better, since they weren't bombing me with questions, they just waited for me to talk and explain.
"Does that mean you're working exclusively for Mr. Jackson?", Reina asked, opening her Tupperware that had homemade food. "Ay Dios mío mi amor, will you be okay?", she said, and I nodded my head.
"He's a scary guy", Lenore said, taking out her own stuff from her food bag.
"I don't have much time to explain it all, but I just have to say that he's not as scary as I thought he was...", I trailed off, thinking about the way he spoke to me earlier. How he had assured me that I was out of the war and that he'd protect me. I couldn't help but feel goosebumps.
"Don't let your guard down, girl", Reina scolded me, seeing me lost in my thoughts.
"Queenie's right Lou, he might be doing this with another purpose, one can't just jump from bad to good from overnight!", Lenore said, and I bit my lip, assuming she was right. But still, something inside of me insisted that he wasn't bad. He had been edged to be bad. That's the difference between him and his uncle.
"You're hesitating", Reina pointed out, squinting her eyes at me.
"No... listen, I've got to go now", I said, gripping my coat tightly as I started walking out of the room.
"Hey! Aren't you going to eat?", Lenore hollered, but I didn't reply, rushing my way back to Mr. Jackson's office.
Michael was waiting for me, he was wearing only a white shirt with a black blazer on, his pants matching the blazer. He looked at his clock and tapped his foot, looking quickly down to his phone before noticing me coming to him.
And boy, when he looked at me, I felt butterflies fluttering in my stomach.
That's when I knew it wasn't right.
I shook my head, having Georgie in the back of my mind. What he would think of me if he knew I was falling for another man? It hasn't been long since he passed away... This isn't right. No matter how much my mind tries to not think of Michael in that way... my body was betraying me. Because I had smiled at him as if seeing him was something that made me feel alive.
I haven't felt this way in a while. I've been feeling so broken and lonely until now, when Michael smiles back at me.
"You're ready, Louisa?", he asks me sweetly as I nod, reaching him to walk next to him. "We're going to one of my favorite restaurants", he says as we wait for the elevator.
"Oh, really? What's their specialty?", I asked, genuinely curious. I knew for a fact that this man doesn't eat that much, he's slim but still he looked strong. I bet he's into the healthy lifestyle.
"You'll see", he smirked, and I simply shrugged.
We reached the parking lot and I had the keys to his BMW as Daniel has given them to me a few minutes before. "He's a terrible driver, if anything, avoid him going behind the wheel", Daniel had told me.
I really had no problem in driving at all, but as I took the keys out of my pocket, Michael quickly snatched them away from my hand. I blinked repeatedly. "H-hey!"
"Let me guess, Daniel told you not to let me drive, huh?", he said with a cheeky smile, making her blush and look at her feet. "I'll take that as a yes..."
"Yeah, he did", she blurted out, making him laugh. "Why is it so funny?"
"Just to make my nerves leave, it's been a while since the last time I drove ...", he said with all seriousness in his face, making me go pale as I entered the seat and slowly buckled the seat belt on... very tight.
He laughed again. "What now?", I asked, a bit annoyed and scared.
"I'm just kidding Louise, I'd never do anything to hurt anyone", he said and turned the engine on, starting to go in reverse to get out. I gave him a quick look that he caught because looked at me at the same time. "You don't believe me!", he said, pretending to be hurt.
"I barely know you", I shrugged. Part of it was real, no matter how I felt some kind of happiness within me by just being with him, in his company. It's just as if I was starting to relax with him being around.
That's just it... right?
"Ask me anything, I'll be glad to answer", Michael said as he started paying a lot of attention to the road. I bit my lip, because I've started to notice that Daniel was right... he isn't the best driver, but he was merely good enough to be out in the streets.
"I don't know what to ask", I admitted, also paying attention to our surroundings, not wanting to be in an accident. "Just tell me a bit about yourself"
"Well...", he started, pressing the brake as we were in a red light. "I'm starting to discover myself, too", he said, and I looked at him with furrowed brows.
"What do you mean?"
"I started noticing that it's either I'm not being myself now or I'm re-discovering myself", he admitted, sighing and then looking at me. "What do you like better? The old me or the new me?"
"You want me to be nice-and-kind-honest or mean-truth-slapping-honest?", I raised an eyebrow, because I also had to set some boundaries on myself, knowing well that I might be capable of saying something that'd upset him.
He seemed to find it funny, as he laughed. "Whatever you feel that's right, honesty is honesty, Lou", he said and I felt something in either my heart or my stomach making me know that I really liked the way my nickname rolled out of his tongue.
"I think... that you need to have the both of them", I told him after a few seconds in silence. He was driving again because the light went green now. He briefly looked at me, curious. "If you're too nice, people might want to step all over you... but if you're too mean, you'll only give people reasons to avoid you... and neither of them are right"
"Hmm...", I heard him sigh. "So, what do you suggest?"
I tapped my chin. "Like I said, you need to have both... create a balance. Know who your enemies are, who you allies are, learn to negotiate with yourself and then with the others", I babbled and then went silent.
"You're making me reflect a lot, you're good at talking", he said, and I looked at the window. "It reminds me of your father", he admitted, and I looked at him with my eyes filled with sadness.
"Yeah, sometimes I remind myself of him, too", I said with an eerie smile. "How old are you?", I changed the topic quickly, trying to avoid a gloomy mood.
"I was born in 1984", he said, and I realized we arrived at some restaurant, he was trying his best to park properly. "We're only two years apart", he said, and I don't know why I had the feeling he was hinting me something with that sentence. Nonetheless, I simply shrugged, taking my seat belt out.
But I was surprised as all of the sudden, Michael ran around the car to open the door for me. I could tell I had a surprised face as he flashed me a smile.
"Don't get me wrong, Lou, I'm a gentleman", he said, extending his hand for me to catch and get out of his car.
"I haven't seen one of your kind in a while", I said sarcastically as I rolled my eyes at him, still, accepting his gesture. "Thank you", he locked the car and then he walked next to me to the entrance, opening the glass door for me and putting his hand on my lower back to push me in, softly.
I could feel the burn in my cheeks, feeling embarrassed and disturbed (in the good way) for his gestures. He was being really sweet to me; I wonder if he's trying to erase all the bad things he's done to me. I'm not the kind of person that holds grudges, if someone wants to change for good and proves that has changed, then the past doesn't matter.
"Table for two, Jackson", he announced to the girl on the entrance as she quickly nodded, maybe recognizing him. She took two menus with her and let us in.
"Follow me, please", she said kindly, showing us the way.
I liked how rustic this place was, it was really comfy and warm. I liked how everything was from wood and once we got in further, I noticed it was a Mexican food restaurant. A classy one.
"You like Mexican food?", I asked Michael curiously.
"I love Mexican food", he said as we stopped in front of a private booth, he again, put a hand on my lower back and guided me to my seat before sitting in front of me.
God, why are you doing this to me? Why do I feel so good with him even though I know it's not alright? Am I disrespecting my late fiancée? If you could only send me a signal...
"Is anything you'd like to drink?", the waitress asked us, ready to write down whatever we say.
"I'd like a glass of water", Michael said and then looked over at me.
"I'd like water, too – please, thank you", I smiled at the waitress that smiled back.
"I'll be back soon", she said and disappeared.
I looked at Michael that was smiling at me, again. "What?"
"You look pretty today", he casually said, making me feel all heated up again. You know why? Because of the light in the roof that gave me a perfect insight of how handsome this man is. I mean, I've noticed it before, but now, looking closely... it seemed surreal.
"Thank you", I managed to say, looking nervously at the Mexican decorations around us. The music was soft but pleasant, I was enjoying watching around. "This is a nice place", I said, trying to change the topic.
"Yes, I love coming here... I try not to frequent, though"
"Why is that?"
"Because I'm used to eating more vegetables than anything else"
"Are you vegetarian?"
"Not strictly, but I try", he said, and I nodded at him. "My adoptive mother always complains about me eating a little, so the only time I ever interrupt my lifestyle is when I go home... which reminds me, I'll be coming back after thanksgiving with a few pounds more", he chuckled. I was glad he was opening a bit to me, but still...
"That must be nice...", I said, a bit envious. I had no one to be with during thanksgiving. Not even a relative. I sunk down in my seat, trying to change the topic, but he interrupted me.
"Would you like to spend thanksgiving with me?", he blurted out and I froze in my spot. "I mean, if you have anything else to do—"
I looked at him with my sweetest look, because he was really trying hard to get on my good side. And I had nothing to do for thanksgiving, why not spending time with him? He was a good guy now, he said himself that he felt different. Having a new friend to rely on seemed to be a good idea.
"I'd love to", I said, laughing at him acting all flustered.
"Great! I'm sure Mama Imani will be thrilled to meet you", he assured me, and I tilted my head. "I call my adoptive mother like that... also, Dr. Oaks is my adoptive father, I call him Papa sometimes... but I find it cringey at this age", he said, and I laughed with him.
"It's not cringey!", I said as the waitress came with our glasses of water, we dismissed her, since we haven't seen the menu yet. "Do you have any siblings?"
"Yup, they're four girls", he said and made a funny face. "I grew between beautiful and delicate flowers", he joked and rolled his eyes. Michael's eyes were dripping glitter as he spoke of his adoptive family. I think it's nice that he still managed to have a family, after all that he's been through.
"And with you, I'm sure it makes a beautiful garden", it slipped out of my mouth as I felt my eyes widen at my own words. The way Michael looked at me assured me that he wasn't bothered by my comment.
But he rather liked it.