Billie
i arrive at brandon's apartment in record time. i don't even knock and just let myself in to see jude sitting on the couch watching netflix.
"could have knocked." he says with his mouth full of popcorn.
"is he really not here?" i ask him heading into his room.
"swear to god. told me he was spending the night at your place" jude replies acting like it's not a big deal.
"dude, he was on his phone all night and told me you had gotten into a bad fight so he couldn't come over to my place and instead had to help you out"
"damn" he simply replies.
"brooo i swear to god if he's cheating on me" i say letting out a nervous forced laugh.
"can you help me out jude?" i say hoping he will agree.
"what's in it for me"
"what do you want?" i ask rolling my eyes.
"head" he says laughing not moving his eyes away from the TV screen.
"listen. i'll give you fifty bucks if you help me out"
that gets his attention and he turns down the volume.
"ok so what do i gotta do?" he asks.
"facetime him?"
"come on all you gotta do is facetime him and fifty bucks is yours" i say as i watch him think about it.
"fine" he says grabbing his phone from beside him on the couch.
jude facetimes brandon but doesn't answer and instead he replies with a text.
"what u need i'm kinda busy at the moment" jude reads aloud from his phone.
busy with fucking what bro.
"say it's important and you need him to answer real quick" i say quickly thinking of something.
"ok" jude says texting brandon back when jude recieves a incoming call.
"ok, shut the fuck up i'm answering" jude says holding the phone so i can see it but not in the view of the camera.
"make this quick" brandon says from the phone.
what the fuck. he's in a girls room. i know a girls room when i fucking see a girls room. i can already tell this is the type of girl that i would not get along with too.
i wasn't even listening to what jude was saying to brandon until i heard jude say my name.
"that's billies room? i thought her shit was like red" jude laughs acting casual.
"aight it's not ok, but your gonna keep your mouth shut or you are never going to be able to speak again" brandon says over the phone.
my heart instantly drops to my stomach. my mind races with emotions. i feel like i'm about to throw up or something.
i don't listen to the rest of the conversation and before i know it, it's over.
"what the fuck. what the FUCK. this can't be happening." i say pacing back and fourth around the room.
"sorry bil" jude says getting up from the couch to put his popcorn bowl into the sink.
"how the fuck is he gonna throw this whole relationship away? how the fuck long do you think he has been doing it for? this is such bullshit bro i swear to god" i say punching the couch as hard as i can before slumping onto it.
"told me he loved me everyday jude! everyday and i beileved his bullshit" i say as the anger starts to leave my body as sadness takes over.
i feel a tear fall down my cheek and more start to come after that.
"billie it's ok" jude says sitting down next me rubbing my arm.
"it's not f-f-fucking okay!" i say back.
i know jude is just trying to help but i'm a mess right now.
jude puts his arms out for me to hug as i cry into his chest.
"shit, i really didn't realize how serious you guys were. i'm so sorry. i would be pissed if i caught my girl cheating" jude says rubbing my back.
i don't reply and continue to cry into his chest. considering we arnt that close i gotta admit it's pretty nice of him to be doing this for me and being there for me right now.
after a couple more minutes of crying i finally compose myself and pull away from judes grip.
"wanna smoke? it'll get your head clear. make you calm down" jude suggests.
i never really liked smoking nor have i ever done it. plus the smell is nasty. but i know drinking is worse then weed and i've gotten drunk countless times at partys zoe, drew and brandon have taken me too.
"sure" i say wiping the wet tears off my face with a sleeve.
jude gets back with weed and a blunt and begins to roll it before lighting it and taking a hit then handing it to me.
i was a little hesitant but hit it needing to calm down instantly coughing.
"first time smoking?" jude asks laughing.
"yeah" i say back.
"that's surprising considering you have been with Q for almost a year"
"he was good about not doing it around me" i say which makes me a little sad but the cannabis is doing it's job and makes me way less tense.
after a couple more minutes of silence i'm almost completely calmed down.
"i still just can't believe it" i say finally breaking the silence handing the blunt back to jude to hit.
"yeah, when you gon confront him bout it?"
"tomorrow. i'll tell him to come over" i say anxious of the thought of seeing him.
"and what you gonna say? you not gonna rat me out right?" jude says with a nervous tone in his voice.
"no. i'm gonna tell him i asked you what was up with your girlfriend and you said nothing then asked you to have him call me but you said how you thought he was with me" i say thinking about the conversation already.
"and what if he denys it?"
"he wont. if he's sorry for what he did and if he loved me he will tell the truth. and if he doesn't then i don't fucking know what i'll do but." i say hoping he will just admit it.
"will you get back with him if he confesses and tells you the truth?"
"oh no fucking way. if you cheat once you will do it again. cheating is the one thing you can't fucking do in a relationship. it breaks every single rule. plus who knows how long he's been doing this for" i say as a small rush of sadness comes over me again and jude seems to sense it as he passes back the blunt.
"i should go. thank you for everything jude and doing all this." i say taking one last long hit from what's left of the blunt.
"you cannot drive home high bil" jude then says to me as i wasn't even thinking about that.
"i feel fine" i say honestly.
"yeah then you get into a wreck and die and i live with it being my fault for the rest of my life" jude says making a fair point.
"touché"
"you can spend the night if you want?" jude offers which sounds nice. being alone isn't ideal right now.
"just have to leave early obviously. wouldn't be a pretty scene if Q walks in and sees you here asleep" jude says laughing which makes me laugh at the thought also.
"well let's get more high then if your staying the night" jude then says heading towards the fridge.
he pulls out some brownies from the fridge each separated in a plastic bag and throws me two.
"here. these are even better. i'm gonna go use the bathroom"
i eat one of the brownies before jude comes back out and sees an empty plastic bag on the table.
his eyes get wide and he looks at me.
"what?" i question as he comes over and sits down next to me on the couch.
"uh. did you eat that whole brownie?"
"yeah why?" i say back quickly.
"that's a lot of weed. you only supposed to have like half of that for a pretty good high." he then says smiling.
"well. good thing you can't overdose on weed right?" i say a little worried now.
"no. but too much can cause anxiety which has happened to me before. plus you are pretty small so you probably don't even have a high tolerance" he says taking the empty ziplock bag and crumpling it up.
"or you have the best high of your life" he says with his voice lighting up a little.
"why did you give me two whole brownies then!"
"to take home! plus i was gonna have a little" he says laughing.
"well i don't feel anything." i say honestly.
"yeah, not yet you don't. edibles are not instant like blunts. gonna take about an hour" he says laughing even harder.
"you are in for a ride ms. eilish"
we pass the time by watching some netflix.
"woah." i say in the middle of the movie we were watching.
"what's up?" jude says grabbing the remote to pause the movie.
"what does water taste like?" i ask in all seriousness.
"what?" jude says laughing.
"no, i'm serious describe me the taste" i say again.
"shit i don't know" he says shrugging.
"bro think about space. like how it's infinite? fucking infinite? like never ends? and then your gonna tell me aliens don't exist?" i say which makes jude laugh again.
"stop laughing i'm serious it's almost scary to think about. like black holes? what the fuck even is that? like why? like i know it's a bunch of matter and gas or whatever but like WHY"
jude just continues to laugh as i think about it.
~
"billie wake up"
i open my eyes to see jude standing over me shaking my shoulder lightly.
"oh hey" i say sitting up and taking the blankets off my legs.
"you past the fuck out last night" he says while folding the blankets. "you should get going though. i don't know when Q is going to be back."
i check my phone to read the time which read 7:30.
"thank god you set an alarm that would not have been good" i say helping jude fold the blankets.
i grab the other brownie off the table and shove it in my hoodie pocket before walking towards the door.
"i'm gonna need this for later" i say thinking about how brandon is going to be coming over which makes me sick to think about.
"thanks jude" i say hugging him one last time before walking out towards my car.
"oh and don't worry about the fifty bucks!" he says which makes me laugh.
"trust me i wasn't worried jude" i say before getting into my car smiling but only for a couple seconds before i think about brandon and how today going to fuckin suck is the only thing on my mind right now as i drive home.
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a/n - billie high, a concept. wouldn't be mad if she made it happen. lmaoo