two months later..
Here I stand, in the same place I was told to enjoy my first ever kiss while it may last. Guess it never lasted long enough.
I looked up to those beautiful eyes and I couldn't help but smile a bit as Edward's dimple seemed to long for it burst of happiness. Edward made it clear in the last two months that nothing shall happen unless I please so. He promised to not touch me or force me to do anything. He was a man of his words.
"Dearly beloved, we are gathered together here in the sight of god, and in the face of this congregation, to join together this man and this women in holy matrimony. Who giveth this women to be married to this man?". The last time I heard this question, my father replied with his gentle touch on my palms, now I feel nothing but his soul standing by me, unable to feel, unable to show me his happiness. And now I had no man, not an uncle, nor a father nor an elder brother to agree. I smile softly as sir Ralph, Edward's father takes my hands and places them in Edward's. He was all I got. All that's left.
"I, Edward.." the Archbishop spoke in order for Edward to repeat. "I Edward" Edward gently spoke as a small small forms on his lips. "Take thee, Elizabeth Conner" the Archbishop continued. "Take thee, Elizabeth conner" Edward repeated. It was the small repeat-ion of small, fragile words of forever promises that never lasted. Time flew by and I didn't feel nervous as I spoke these words. My heart didn't know whether it's because I've said it once, or it's because Edward is the right person.
"I announce you husband and wife, you may kiss the bride" the Archbishop said, moving backwards. I look at Edward and I see his worried face, he knew despite the two months, my heart still manages to be in love with Oliver. However, my mind knew nothing of such love. My mind told me to smile an assuring smile that promised peace and I did. He leaned in and kissed me. It was sweet and soft, he didn't linger in it though, as he pulled away for my respect.
He smiled mildly and his soft warm palms caressed my cheeks multiple times. I was happy, I was truly happy. I was happy in his touch, in Edwards. The cheers of everyone behind us and their eager claps, made it's clear excitement and agreement to this choice I made and that's all I wanted.
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I left the hall of the now empty room of people, and I smile brightly as I felt alive in a long time. Edward stood by me, when everyone came and spoke to me about how I was feeling after my loss. It was hard but not as hard as it could've been. I was half full, but not half empty. The part of my own void was slowly being filled with Edward's presence. And half was to be born in a month. "We'll make sure all doors are locked." Caroline and my mother spoke simultaneously as I and Edward giggle at their actions.
"It's not-" I started off as I waited for Edward to complete. He nodded lightly and said to them "maybe after this little one comes" he smirks to them as he points to my belly. "Edward!" I gasp at his foolish courage. Mother and Caroline both laugh as they as excuse themselves and leave, giggling in their own silent conversation. Edward's eyes shift from their fading silhouette to my own wide eyes that seemed to still be in shock.
He chuckled "what?". I try to hold my smile in and my eyebrows raise in confusion, "what about all these 'unless you please so' promises". He laughs, laugh deep and pleasant, "oh it's still there my queen, it's just a matter of time until you 'need' me". I gasp at his last words as I prepare myself to kick him, "until what?!!". "Until you need me~" he sang as he moves quickly from beside me and makes his run. "Oh you just wait Edward!" I yell as I grab my dress and run after him.
Our laughs were musics to these lonely walls that surround us. I panted heavily as I tried to run after Edward. He was fast, really fast. And I didn't bother to run so after a few seconds I walked slowly, smiling ear to ear, rubbing on my belly "I'm sorry, it was a sudden workout". My panting became normal in a bit as I came near my bedroom. I opened the closed doors, expecting to see a happy Edward.
But I was faced with silence.
My smile didn't fade, it stood strong with its denials power. I step inside slowly as I call for him, "Edward?". My calls where more of a whisper rather than my fearful calls of help, but i knew deep down, Edward would hear me no matter what, "Edward..are you there?". My anxiety slowly and yet harshly rose to a level I felt uncomfortable in. I was in agony, memories and imaginations of Oliver's death knocked onto my mind and I did my best in these few second to push it all out.
I moved on.
I should be.
I feel as my feet leave the ground in a split second and I Yelp. The steady arms of Edward turn me around to face him and I was still comprehending what just happened. My eyes flutter and laid their sight on his, he cupped my cheeks and grinned, "I'll make you the happiest person ever. I promise". I mildly smile, a smile that gave everything and promised nothing. I chuckle softly as he held me and swung me around the room. "Hey! Hey, go slow, I have a child in me, remember" I yelp in fear of falling. "Oh come on! I bet she's having fun too!!" Edward suddenly said as he put me down on the wooden floor.
My hands still rest on my tummy and his words slowly get the hold of my mind. I look down at my own belly and then back at him, who's eyes were tracing my every movement, "and what makes you say it's a girl?.." I whisper, voice hitching in memory of Oliver's wish. Edward was confused himself as he spoke, "I- I don't really know! I just feel it" he chuckles, dimples piercing into my heart.
I felt it too. I hope it to be so.
My dear O̶l̶i̶v̶e̶r̶ ̶ Edward.