I HAVE UPDATED TWICE! If you haven't read Chapter 28 go back and read that first!
Song Above is....She by Jake Scott (This song fits the end of the chapter)
PSA: there is a small mention of abuse towards the end of this. Nothing major or anything but just a small warning.
Happy Reading!
"Trent." I groaned into the phone.
"I just want to have a friendly conversation with the guy." My brother said, trying to act innocent when I knew his intentions were anything but.
As soon as I got home from my shift at the bookstore Trent was calling me to continue our conversation earlier. I knew as soon as he heard Alex's voice through the phone he wasn't going to let it go. His protective older mode was in full effect, despite him being hundred of miles away. That is why I put off answering his calls until the next day.
"You're 'friendly' conversation will consist of you trying to run him off." I placed my phone between my ear and my shoulder as unlocked the front door and shut it behind me.
"I want to make sure the guy my little sister is hanging out with a good guy."
"He is Trent, you don't need to try and scare him off. Plus he isn't the only guy that I'm hanging out with." I didn't realize what I said until I heard my brother yell through the phone.
"What? You are hanging out with multiple guys?!"
I winced as he yelled, closing my eyes as I mentally yelled at myself for saying that. It did come out worse than it was though.
"They are my guy FRIENDS." I emphasized 'friends'. "They each have their own girlfriends." That was kinda a lie. Derek wasn't really with Olivia...yet. And Noah well I wasn't sure about Noah. But Trent didn't need to know that.
"They all have girlfriends?"
"Yes and we are also friends."
"Does this Allen guy have a girlfriend to?" I rolled my eyes at Trent purposely saying Alex's name wrong.
"No he doesn't." Trent mumbled over the phone about how he better not have one. He went on for a minute before I finally sighed. "Trent please."
"Ri, it's my duty as your older brother to look out for you even if I'm not there."
"I know."
"I didn't like that Mitch guy so I have to make sure about this one." His comment threw me for a second. I rarely talked about Mitch to Trent. Besides him being my brother I felt like I couldn't, especially after everything started going south.
"You didn't know Mitch..."
"Ri I may not be there but I still know what goes on in that town."
"What do you mean?" Did he know what Mitch did to me? My heart started to race in my chest a little bit. I didn't want Trent to know about that. It was my problem not his.
"I still have a few friends there and they know that Mitch is an asshole. Hell he was an asshole when I was there two years ago." Trent scoffed. I let out a breath hearing that he didn't know about the whole thing. I wasn't sure if I'd ever tell him anyways. "I'm just glad you guys weren't hanging out long."
When I did eventually tell Trent about Mitch I made it seem like we were partners in class and were only 'hanging' out a few times. He didn't need to know more than that. I don't even want to imagine what Trent would do if he found out. Trent may seem easy going but he had a pretty bad temper.
Like I said when I helped patch up Alex I've done it multiple times with Trent. I'd be woken up at 2 in the morning with Trent coming home from some party with a cut over his eye or cheek. Everyone around here knew about Trent's temper and not to piss him off. He only fought back if provoked at least.
"Me too." I mumbled.
"Just be careful sis. I won't hesitate to kick his ass if he breaks your heart." Despite the warning I felt a smile tug at my lips.
"Do you know when you'll get leave? You'll be here for Christmas right?" Halloween was literally a week away and soon after would be Thanksgiving and Christmas.
"I've already submitted in for Christmas but I'm not sure about Thanksgiving. I'll try my best but I'm not sure Ri." I felt my heart drop. Trent not being here for Thanksgiving was going to hard but if he couldn't for Christmas.... I didn't even want to think about that right now.
Not wanting to deal with that topic right now I quickly changed the subject.
"So Nicholas." At the mention of his friend Trent cursed under his breath. "He seems nice."
"He's a pain in my ass."
"You guys seem close." I put him on speaker as I moved around the kitchen.
"We met a few months ago when he came to base. He's part of my squadron so he's always around." Despite the little comments about Nicholas I had a feeling the two of them were best friends. It was nice to hear that Trent had someone watching his back.
Trent never said it out loud but I knew going into the military was a huge change for him. Here he was the star soccer player, popular, loved. Then he was thrown into a whole new world where none of that mattered anymore. And he had no one there either so hearing he had a friend made me feel better.
"Well I am glad you guys are friends."
"Don't let him hear you say that, he'll never let it go." Trent groaned. Suddenly in the background I heard a new voice.
"Who are you talking to?"
"None of your business."
"Oh it is your cute sister?"
"Nicholas I will not hesitate to knock you on your ass."
"Oh come on I just want to say hi." I could hear shuffling on the other side of the phone.
"You already said hi."
"But I want to again." Nicholas said in a 'duh' tone. I had yet to actually meet the guy but I already liked him.
"Hey Nicholas." I greeted with a grin.
"Riley right?"
"Yeah. Nice to meet you."
"You know for the longest time I thought you were Trent's girlfriend because of how much he talked about you."
"We've gotten that a few times when we go out to eat at places." There's been a few times the waitress will say we are a cute couple or something. It was beyond disgusting.
"I knew it was too good to be true. Who would want to date that ugly ass anyways."
"You are uglier than I am jackass." Trent grumbled in the background.
"Dude I pull the most girls when we go out."
The two of them bickered back and forth about how much girls they could pull. I let them continue as I made a small snack before I got started on some homework. It was hilarious hearing them bicker like an old married couple. It now made sense why they were best friends, they seemed very similar.
"Fine. Next time we go out lets see who gets the most numbers. Whoever gets the least owes the other a twelve pack." Trent said. For some reason his words set something off in me.
"You two will not use innocent girls for a bet." I snapped. The line went quiet as I gripped the counter top.
"Riley-" Trent started but I interrupted him.
"No. You two will not do that to anyone. No girl deserves to be used for some stupid ass bet." Their words brought me back to Mitch. While it wasn't the same thing that Mitch did to me it was still a bet. A bet to lure some girls in only for it not to be real. I wasn't going to let that happen to anyone.
"Do you two hear me?" My tone was severely rude but I couldn't bring myself to care at the moment. The two of them were quiet for a moment before they finally replied.
"We won't." Trent and Nicholas said. I could hear the confusion in their voices.
"I got to go. Talk to you later." I quickly hung up the phone before they could say another word. I probably shouldn't have snapped at them like that but those words were sensitive to me. Trent had no clue why and was most likely confused about the whole thing but I would apologize for it later. Right now was not the time.
I was calming myself down when the sound of my front door opening caught my attention. I thought I locked it behind me. Who would be here? Alex? No, he had work today and then was picking up Harper. The sudden idea that someone just broke into my house had my heart racing. Maybe I should have stayed on the phone with my brother.
Just as I was contemplating reaching for a knife the sound of footsteps came towards the kitchen. Before I could lunge for some sort of weapon a familiar voice called out.
"Riley!" Not even a second later Lexi came into view.
"Lexi?" My heart was racing as I realized it was just Lexi and not some random murderer. "What are you doing here?"
"I'm hiding from Nico." She groaned as she took a seat across from me, dropping her own backpack on the counter.
"At my house?" Out of all the places she came here? I mean we weren't exactly the closest, she didn't hate me anymore at least but I hadn't thought she liked me enough to just drop by.
"Yep." I stared at her for a good minute still processing that she was hiding out here. From her own boyfriend.
"Why?" I questioned.
"He wants me to do something that I don't wanna do." She shrugged while toying with the strap of her backpack on the counter. I studied her and how she was avoiding my gaze. Something about her tone let me know I shouldn't pry more into the subject.
"I was just about to do some homework...."
"Great cause I need help on some homework." Lexi immediately jumped onto the new topic. I didn't miss the relief in her voice at me not pushing the subject more.
Grabbing my own backpack I went over to the dining room table for more room. I wasn't really sure what to say to Lexi. This was the first time we've hung out as the two of us, all the other times Olivia was there kind of like a buffer. Lexi has made it slightly known that I'm not her favorite person.
"Why are you acting weird?" Lexi suddenly asked.
"I'm not."
"Yeah you are." She looked over at me and this time she didn't any sort of wall or glare on her face. I glanced down as I twirled my pencil around my fingers.
"I just thought you didn't like me. So just a little confused why you came here of all places." Realizing how that sounded I quickly added, "but you are more than welcome here."
Lexi looked away from me sighing.
"I don't dislike you Riley, or I don't anymore." I cracked a smile at that. "I have a hard time...opening up to people, especially new people. Its not on you or anything." It was surprising to hear the vulnerability in her voice. Lexi came off as a badass, guarded, hard outer shell, type of person.
"I've moved around a lot in foster care so making friends is a bit...difficult. I don't like becoming attached to someone just for them or me to leave."
I couldn't imagine what it was like being in foster care, moving from different places constantly. I could see why Lexi was stand-offish with people. She didn't want to get close only to leave and start all over again.
"I'm protective of my friends and when I met you I wasn't sure who you were. I didn't want someone to come in and hurt the only real friends I've ever made. I shouldn't have been such a bitch."
I now completely understand why Lexi acted the way she did with me at first. Hell I probably would have to if I was in her situation. You never know what could happen when you suddenly let another person into your tightly knitted group of friends.
"You don't need to apologize to me, I understand why you did it." I licked my bottom lip as I continued. "You guys are the closest thing I've had to friends in...well forever. Even before this year the few friends I had were only friends with me because we had classes together."
"Plus I'm just always a bitch." Lexi joked making me laugh.
"I wouldn't call you a bitch."
"But you clearly thought it at first." The smile eon her face let me know she wasn't mad.
"Okay yeah I did." I laughed. "But you've redeemed yourself."
"I guess I'm lucky Nico sticks by me when I am one." A fond look crossed her face as she thought about her boyfriend.
"You guys really fit each other."
"You think so?"
"You're both...now don't take offense....you both are kinda moody and give off that 'don't mess with me vibe'. Nico is like seriously scary." Lexi laughed at my words.
"He acts scary but he really isn't. You should see how he acts with his grandma." I grinned at the imagine of Nico being told what to do by his grandma.
"It's clear he loves you." The same look crossed Lexi's face as she nodded. "So...why are you hiding from him?"
I wasn't sure if I should bring it up but I could tell it was bothering her. If she needed I would gladly listen.
"There's something he wants me to do but I don't want."
"He wouldn't want you to do something if it was going to hurt you though." I pointed out. I couldn't see Nico pushing Lexi to do something if it would hurt her in anyway.
"He doesn't know anything." She almost snapped but railed it in. "It should be on my choice whether I want to or not."
"If you need to talk about it." When she didn't say anything I let it slide. I wasn't going to force her to talk about it if she didn't want to.
"My birth mother wants to contact me." Lexi said a moment later. Her response shocked me for a second, not fully expecting that response. "I made the mistake of telling Nico and now he wants me to contact and meet her."
"You told him you didn't want to?" I asked.
"Yeah and he still thinks I should do it. I don't want to meet her. She gave me up when I was born and now 17 years later she wants to re-connect. Bullshit. She had almost 18 years to find me yet she hasn't until now." Lexi shook her head as anger filled her voice.
"Does she seriously think I'll just instantly want to meet and act like she never gave me up? That I didn't spend the last 17 years bouncing from foster home to foster home, completely alone."
I sat there and let Lexi vent everything on her mind. It was clear she needed to get it all out and I had a feeling she hasn't told anyone any of this until now.
"I have spent so many years wondering what I did to wrong to make my own mother give me up. That I wasn't good enough because of it. All of that isn't just going to go away with one little letter." Lexi angrily wiped at the tears that ran down her cheeks.
Keeping my voice soft I gently asked, "Have you told Nico all of this? The way you truly feel about the whole thing?"
"He wouldn't get it." She shook her head. "His mother didn't choose to leave him, she died in a fire. If she could she would have stayed. Mine didn't. Mind choose to leave me."
Hearing about Nico's mom made my chest squeeze. It made me realize how little I knew of everyone. It seemed like almost everyone in our group has lost a parent or someone they loved. No wonder they are all so close.
"I won't let my choice be taken away from me again. Not this time." She said through gritted teeth as tears rolled down her faced. Her mascara was smeared around her eyes, making her look more goth with her purple hair.
"Wait." At her words I sat up straighter, pushing everything else to the back of my mind. "Your choice....has Nico done something to you?" If she was implying what I think she was. When she didn't say anything I reached over and grabbed her hand. "Lexi has Nico done something to you?"
"God no!" She ripped her hand away from mine. "Nico would never hurt me, he's never even raised his voice at me." She said it with so much conviction I knew she was telling the truth. My shoulders relaxed. I wasn't sure if I could handle knowing if Nico was hurting Lexi in any way.
"Sorry I thought you meant him and I...I didn't mean to draw to conclusions." I was afraid I made her even more upset when she didn't say anything for a moment. As I opened my mouth to apologize again Lexi started talking.
"About a year and a half ago I was in a relationship this guy." I watched as she clenched onto the table until her knuckles turned white. "He was...he was a horrible person. He was nice at first. Gave me the kind attention I had always craved for since I had no one. He made me feel loved and worth so much."
I had a feeling I knew where this was going. I swallowed thickly as she continued on talking.
"He changed fairly quickly. One second he was a sweet boyfriend and the next he was cutting me off from any sort of friends I had made. Telling me I couldn't go to certain places or hang out with other people. Told me to stop dressing like a slut." I watched as her eyes almost glazed over with past memories. I reached back over and pulled at her hand, making her unclench the counter and held it in mine.
"Didn't take him long to become abusive. He told me he loved him so I stayed. I wanted love and thought that was what love was suppose to be like. He took away who I was." Lexi's eyes met mine and it took everything in me not to cry.
"Once it got to the point I couldn't cover the bruises a teacher finally noticed. He got arrested and is in jail. I got sent to another foster home...here." I squeezed her hand tightly. " I refuse to feel like that again, especially after knowing what love is really suppose to be like."
"Does Nico..."
"He knows all about it. He's the greatest person on this planet and he would never do anything to hurt me but....this feels like that again. Like my choice isn't being accounted for. It's my choice if I want to contact my birth mother or not, not his."
I literally had no words to describe Lexi. She's the strongest person I know. How someone can go through that and still find it in her to love someone again, is truly amazing. I couldn't have handled what she did that is for sure.
I also understood where she was coming from. Nico pushing her to contact her birth mother when she didn't want to, is bringing her back to that horrible place. He was forcing her to do it but in a way it could be seen as such by Lexi. She really needed to talk to him and tell him what she just said to me. I know for a fact he'd instantly back off.
Nico is just trying to help her but sometimes the person doesn't need anyone's help. This was all on Lexi and what she wanted to do. No one else had a right to sway her decision.
"It is your choice Lexi. You don't have to contact her if you don't want to. No one is going to take that right from you, not even Nico. But you need to let Nico know how you feel."
"Tell him he's slightly reminding me of my abusive ex-boyfriend? To see the look on his face? No."
Not wanting to push her any further, especially after what she just told me, I just nodded.
"Okay."
Almost if on cue Lexi's phone started ringing. By one glance at it on the counter I knew it was Nico. Lexi stared at it until it stopped. Only for it to start ringing again seconds later only this time followed by a loud knock on my front door.
It didn't take a genius to know it was Nico at the door. Lexi's eyes widened as she shook her head.
"I don't want to talk to him right now. I can't." She shook her head rapidly. "Please make him go away. Just for a little bit until I've calmed down." She pleaded. At her plea I found myself nodding.
"Okay, I'll be back in a minute." With a soft smile I stood up and headed for the door. A quick glance over my shoulder I saw Lexi with her head in her hands. She needed a bit to calm down and get her thoughts in order before seeing Nico.
As another knock sounded I quickly opened the door and stepped out, shutting the door behind me as I did so. I had wanted to close the door before Nico forced his way in, he was much stronger than I was, but by doing so I was now chest to chest with him.
He quickly took a step back and brought those intense eyes to mind.
"Is Lexi here? Is she okay?" Nico rattled off.
"She's here and she's okay." I tried to ease his tension. He started for the door but I stepped in front of him to block his access. "She needs some time first."
"What do you mean 'time'? What happened!" I could see an almost wild look on his face. Damn he was intimidating standing in front of me. His stupid height didn't help.
I crossed my arms and gathered myself.
"She needs time to put her thoughts in order." I instantly saw something flash across his face. I realized it a second later.
"She wants to break up with me?" His voice got quiet yet almost lethal. My eyes widened.
"No! No!" I put my hands out. "That's not what I meant."
"Then what did you mean?" Nico asked, his voice hard as rocks, the tension in his shoulders visible.
Getting him to leave was going to take me a bit longer than I thought. Knowing what I had to do I looked up into his face.
"Take a seat." I gestured to the front steps. He hesitated but when I didn't look away he slowly nodded and went towards the steps.
I sat down beside him, his huge frame taking up most of the space. We sat in silence for a moment as I tried to figure out what I was going to say. I didn't want to betray Lexi and tell him some things but I think he deserved to know, even if it was me saying it.
"She told me."
"Told you what?"
"About her birth mother and you wanting her to get in contact her."
"That's what she's so upset about?" I nodded. "She has been dodging my texts, calls, avoiding my at school for two days now, all because of that?" I wanted to face palm at his comment. Guys are seriously so oblivious sometimes I swear.
"Nico." I sighed. "It's not all about you wanting her to contact her birth mom. It's about you pushing the topic on her."
"I'm not pushing it on her. She won't talk about it so I keep bringing it up." I pinched the bridge of my nose and took a deep breath. Guys are such idiots.
"You bringing it up constantly is making Lexi feel like you don't care about her feelings."
"But I do-" I put my hand up to stop him.
"What you think you are doing isn't what she wants. Nico it is Lexi's choice whether she wants to contact her or not. She doesn't need you butting in making her feel like she has no choice in the matter."
"I just know she will regret not doing this later on. I don't want her to live with that." Nico tried to reason. I saw what he was trying to do, and it was sweet of him, but he wasn't necessarily coming off the right way.
"Lexi also told me about her ex." I glanced over at him as I spoke. The moment I mentioned her ex he sat up straight and his jaw clenched. He clearly hated the guy.
Knowing this wasn't going to go over well I stilled myself for what I was about to say next. If Lexi wasn't going to say it I will.
"In a way Lexi feels you telling her to do this is like you are taking away her choices, that her feelings aren't being accounted for...like with her ex." The moment the words were out Nico reared back like he had been hit.
"She isn't comparing you two. Trust me she knows, I know, hell the entire world knows you would do nothing to hurt her. You are nothing like her disgusting ex." I hesitated for a second before placing my hand on his forearm. He needed to know she didn't see him that like guy at all.
"I would never do that." Nico spoke, his voice almost horse from holding back.
"Lexi knows that which is why she doesn't want to say anything to you about it. But Nico," I squeezed his forearm. "you need to let her decide. Whether she regrets it or not it is her choice to make. You just have to be by her side when she makes that decision."
I could tell he was taking in my words as he stayed silent.
"I know we don't know each other well or are that close but I know you are a great guy Nico." He looked down at me. "Even if you are scary as hell sometimes, you will never do anything to hurt Lexi. So don't think for one second she believes you are anything like that guy. And if you are going to blame anyone you can blame me. She wasn't going to tell you anything but I did. So be angry at me for it."
"I'm not angry." Nico finally spoke. "I just don't understand why she wouldn't tell."
"She was worried how you'd take the whole ex-boyfriend thing." I shrugged.
"It didn't feel good but I could never be mad at Lex. I never knew I needed someone like her until the day we met."
"You two have the strongest relationship so you are going to go inside and tell her that you love her, and that you will support whatever decision she wants."
"I thought you said she wanted to be left alone?" He asked confused.
"When a girl says she wants to be left alone she really means she doesn't." I rolled my eyes. "I'll give you a piece of advice...if a girl says she's 'fine', 'wants to be left alone', 'I'm not hungry', do the EXACT opposite of what she says." I patted his arm and stood up. Before I could get more than a step away a hand on my wrist stopped me.
"Riley thank you." I had to tilt my head up to look at him.
"Of course." I smiled.
"You're pretty great, no wonder Alex likes you so much." My heart fluttered in my chest at his words. Before I could make a fool out of myself in front of Nico I stepped back and gestured to the door.
"Ready?" Nico nodded, determination clear on his face.
Crossing my fingers that Lexi wouldn't be pissed at me for this I opened my front door and entered, Nico trailing behind me. I turned the corner to find Lexi still seated at the table staring at nothing.
"Lex." Nico spoke first. At his voice her head snapped towards us. Her eyes went from Nico to mine and back to Nico. Not wanting to be in the middle any longer I quickly walked towards the table.
"I'm gonna let you two talk." I gathered my stuff in my arms. I looked at Lexi who was staring at Nico. They'll be just fine.
While they were busy staring at one another I made my way towards the stairs.
"When you are done please don't have sex on my couch." I started up the stairs before quickly adding, "Or in my kitchen!" I yelled. I heard Nico cough at my words so before either of them could say a word I ran up the stairs and to my room.
As soon as the door shut I leaned against it and found myself smiling. I just bonded with both Lexi and Nico and quite possibly helped their relationship. Damn I'm good.
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I updated two chapters at once! Who I am? Have I been taken over by an Alien?! Maybe so. Once again sorry for making you guys wait so long for an update but I hope this made up for it.
This is a slightly different chapter. I wanted to show you guys more about Lexi and even Nico since they haven't really been talked about. So you got to learn exactly what happened to Lexi. Lexi is probably one of the strongest characters I've written and I hope I can write her story one day too.
One last thing before you go! The Fiction Awards are up! Last year we didn't win sadly (we only lost by like 100 votes) so this year is ours! If you'd like to Nominate this book or any of my other ones (not Silent Love), you can head over and do so! I have the link on my profile that will take you right there. Just read through the instructions cause they have different categories this year. So if you'd like to nominate me it would me so much to me! LOVE YOU GUYS!! <3 <3 <3 <3
VOTE, COMMENT
-Ken