Olivia's apartment
"I wanted you all here because I made a decision that everyone should know about" I said as Fin and Nick sat listening. I called them over to Olivia's so that everyone would be on the same page and also to clear up some misconceptions that I felt were long overdue.
"What's goin on?" Fin asked just as Olivia came from the nursery and sat on the arm of the chair where I sat.
"I already called Barba, he's gonna meet with me first thing in the morning. I've decided to seek prosecution for my rape and um...you guys are gonna find out some things that I want you to hear from me."
"Things like what?" Nick asked. I nervously looked over at Olivia who reached over and held my hand.
"It's okay Amanda" she whispered. I nodded and turned again to face Nick and Fin, taking a deep breath before I continued.
"I didn't... I didn't tell you guys the whole truth about what happened that night"
"Manda..."
"Fin, please let me say this before I lose my nerve" I begged. He stopped and nodded solemnly "I wasn't..." I squeezed Olivia's hand harder as my tears began falling
"That night I wasn't raped by just one guy...I was attacked by a group" I said as my voice trailed off but this time, no matter how much the shame gnawed at me, I kept my head up and looked at my friends dead on as I continued. "...there were um, there were seven of them and I couldn't tell you because I was too ashamed so I let you both think..."
The room fell quiet. I had stunned them both into silence.' And a long moment passed before either of them spoke again and even then, it was only at Olivia's insistence.
"Guys, please say something"
It happened so in sync, it was as if they'd planned it as both men got up at the same time, fury in their eyes and shouted
"I will kill every last one of those motherfuckers!"
"Listen to me, okay, no one is killing anyone." Olivia intervened as she stood and went to them. we have everything we need to make sure that they go away but you two cannot go off half cocked and give any of them a legal leg to stand on okay?"
Nick wiped the tears from his eyes as Fin made his way over to me, it was only the third time I'd ever seen tears in his eyes, the first being after Liv's ordeal with Lewis, the second was when I initially told him about the rape, and now. He held out his hand and I took it as he pulled me to my feet and threw his arms around me. We stood like that for a long moment before he released me, kissing me on the cheek.
"I gotta get back to work. Liv take care of her" he said, his voice full with emotion. Olivia nodded her compliance and Fin turned to leave.
"Come here" Nick said as he pulled me in for a hug."I told you before, anything you need..."
"I know" I said tearfully as he too kissed my cheek before turning to exit the apartment. "So what now?" I asked, turning to Olivia.
"Now we pray that they don't do anything stupid before Barba can get handcuffs on your attackers!"
***
Late that afternoon...
Everyone had gone and after feeding Noelle and playing with her for a while, Olivia now went about cleaning the apartment talking to Noelle while she completed her chores. Noelle sat contentedly in her bouncy chair, her blue eyes following her mother as she went back and forth about the apartment.
"All done!" Olivia said softly as she returned the vacuum to the closet. Noelle was falling asleep and she didn't want to startle her. Olivia quickly made her way to the kitchen to wash and dry her hands before she walked back to the living room where Noelle sat on the coffee table and unbuckled her infant daughter from the chair, lifting her to cradle her in her arms. Noelle suddenly forgot about her plans for sleep and looked up eagerly at her mother, giving her a big smile.
"Are you smiling for mama?" Olivia cooed, giving Noelle an even bigger smile in return and Noelle responded with a happy squeal, making Olivia laugh. These little interactions with her daughter were the very things she lived for. She brought Noelle closer and smothered her little cheeks with kisses.
"If only you knew how much I love you!" she said as put Noelle on her shoulder and began rubbing soft, soothing circles on her back while Noelle curled into her neck, deciding she was comfortable and nuzzled there. She had familiarized herself with Olivia's sweet scent and found it as calming as she did the sound of her voice."I think you already do" Olivia smiled and slowly began to sway her body, rocking her daughter. Their moment was interrupted when the doorbell rang.
"We have a visitor" she cooed as she made her way to the door and opened it. "Brian...hey" she said, somewhat surprised o see him standing there.
"I'm gonna say you completely forgot that you wanted me to stop by" he couldn't help but smile at seeing Olivia holding a baby in her arms.
"I did, I'm sorry. Come on in" she apologized, stepping aside as Brian entered the apartment and discarded his jacket.
"Oh man, is this her?" He asked, looking at Noelle
"It is. This is Noelle" Olivia smiled proudly as she moved the baby from her shoulder to the crook of her arm so that Brian could get a look at her.
"Aw, Liv she's beautiful!" he said as he looked down at the infant
"I think so too" Olivia said as she gazed lovingly at her daughter whose curious eyes darted back and forth between looking at her mother and the stranger who had just entered their home but when she saw her mother's smile, she offered one too.
"Look at that smile; hey princess! Wow!" he mused before looking up at Olivia "You think maybe I could hold her?"
"She likes meeting new people, don't you baby girl?" she adjusted Noelle's receiving blanket before carefully placing her in Brian's arms. "just...be careful"
"I got her"
"Watch her head"
"Liv - we're good" he laughed softly as they made their way into the living room, amused at how protective she already was
"Sorry, I'm just... so anyway, I got as much information as I could about Sara" Brian sat down on the sofa with Noelle while Olivia went to retrieve the list from the bookshelf and handed it to Brian. Noelle decided that she liked this stranger and smiled at him before yawning, her eyelids getting heavy; he completely melted.
This kid's already a heartbreaker!" Olivia smiled and sat down beside him on the sofa.
"Already has Nick and Fin wrapped around her little finger" she said
"Just like her mom.
"So um, do you think it'll be enough?" she asked about the list as Brian quickly looked it over.
"Russ is pretty resourceful so I'm sure this will be more than enough" he said as he put the list in his pocket "White hair, huh? " Brian asked as he stroked the small, snowy patch of Noelle's hair.
"Yeah, I guess it'll darken eventually but for now..."
"We got ourselves a little Targaryan"
"We?" Olivia asked
"I mean...you..." he said, finally looking away from Noelle and up at Olivia with a smile. Their eyes caught and for a brief moment each held the others gaze. It was Olivia who looked away, clearing her throat as she did and stood up from the sofa.
"Um, I should put her down" she said, looking at her now sleeping daughter.
"This is a good look for you"
"What?" she asked as she bent to take her from Brian
"Motherhood" he answered. She smiled as he put the Noelle in her arms, having not been able to avoid getting a peek down her shirt and they again caught each other's eyes .
"You know, if you're not busy maybe I could hang around for a bit... do some catching up"
"Okay, um there's beer in the fridge"
"Yeah, I think I'll have one" he said, still grinning at her
"I'll be right back. FYI, I know that look; we are not having sex!"
"Who said anything about sex?"
Later...
"Oh god, Brian FUCK!" she cried, trembling as her sweaty, naked body collapsed on top of his, her hips still moving involuntarily, orgasm crashing through her as their tongues danced greedily in each other's mouths. He thrust up and into her one last time as the last of his climax left his body and he began to soften inside her; both of them now spent and out of breath.
"I haven't come that hard since..." she began
"The last time we were together" he finished "Holy shit babe, the way you work those hips... my god!" he panted. She grinned as she rolled off of him and onto her back.
"Why do we keep doing this?"
"Because you love me and because you want us but you're too afraid to admit it."
"Or because it's good sex"
"Yeah" he grinned cockily "Because I'm sure you've screamed "I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you; oh god I fucking love you" to every man you've ever been with."
"You're an ass!"
"I'm an ass who's in love with you."
"Brian..."
"Liv, please. Give me one more chance to prove myself to you"
"I can't take that risk, I have Noelle now. I can't let you in her life just to have you decide later that we're not what you want anymore."
"Look, I admit that I was wrong, the whole adoption thing seemed like nothing but a knee jerk reaction to you losing our son but the second you opened that door an hour ago...I got it; hell a blind man could see the love you have for that little girl"
"And all of a sudden, you're ready t what? Be a family?"
"I don't know. I didn't plan on us ending up in bed together when I came here and I sure as hell didn't plan on saying these things to you but seeing how happy you are and holding Noelle...something about those few minutes just seemed right. All I want is a chance. Liv?"
"I should get her bottle ready, she'll be awake in a minute" she said as she got up from the bed and reached for her robe
"So that's it? You don't even think about it?" he asked, feeling dejected.
"Why don't you get that information over to your friend and come back...we'll talk" she said, a faint smile on her lips as she tied her robe.
"You mean it?"
"Yeah. But no promises so save the guilt trips"
"I'm done with those"
"Good" she kissed him quickly on the lips. "Let yourself out, I'll see you tonight." She said and left her bedroom.
***
THE FOLLOWING MORNING
Office of ADA Raphael Barba
"Thank you for agreeing to see me on such short notice" I said as I entered Barba's office.
"It sounded important" there was a note of concern in his voice as he shut the door and walked over to his desk, pausing before he sat "Please" he gestured to the chair facing him. I quickly thanked him before sitting.
"So, what can I do for you detective - I guess Agent Rollins would be more appropriate" he grinned as sat down behind his desk.
"Not agent yet but..."
in spite of the fact that I was now ready and willing to put this whole thing in motion, actually doing it scared the hell out of me! my life, for better or worse was about to become a circus and as I sat here in the D.A.'s office, prepared to open up and tell him about that night, my stomach began doing flips, my throat suddenly felt dry and all I wanted to do was to take my now rapidly beating heart and haul ass out of this place, just forget the whole thing! Calm down, girl. I told myself as I took a deep breath.
"Rollins... are you okay?"
"I um...could I trouble you for a glass of water?" I asked nervously as I cleared my throat and tried to quell my apprehension.
"Of course" he said, quickly getting up and walking across the room to the crystal water pitcher that sat atop the sideboard by the window. I found myself wringing my hands as I willed my knees to stop shaking and I thanked Rafael when he returned with the water, taking a long drink that emptied the glass then let out another deep breath.
"I'm sorry"
"Don't apologize. What's going on?" he asked as I sat my glass down on the desk.
Amanda, nothing is forcing you to do this. Just forget about it and go! Was what my nerves screamed but my heart saw the bigger picture and as it began to soothe my mind I thought back to yesterday and the promise I made to Noelle as I sat rocking her in her nursery...
"You don't even know it babydoll, but since you came you've given me more strength and more courage than I ever dreamed possible and what I'm about to do is for you. I want you to grow up fearless like your momma, not a coward like me. I ran away and I was willing to let them get away with hurting me because I was afraid but I'm stronger now and I'm ready to get back up..."
"Amanda?" Rafael called, jarring me from my thoughts
"I'm sorry...I mean...I need you to take my statement." I said boldly, suddenly feeling more sure of myself and the reason I was here.
"Regarding...?"
"Last summer, July 23rd..." I paused to catch my breath and my eyes swelled with tears but I remembered why I was doing this and found my nerve again "I was raped and I want to press charges!"
***
Chad's penthouse
He sat in the middle of his oversized leather sofa, his flaccid penis in his hand. He'd been watching the assaults he'd recorded for the last two hours while he got high and jerked off and now, as he watched his favorite in the group series, the one with the hot blonde from last summer, he worked especially hard to get himself off.
"Please...please stop!" she begged while he and Grayson held her down as Kip and Jason used their fists in a manner inconsistent with her lower region.
"Man her holes are gonna be a fuckin caves when we're done!" Kip laughed as the others cheered them on
Chad smiled and did another line of blow.
"Yeah...definitely my favorite hoe!" he said, pleased that he had finally stroked himself back to an erection.