"This isn't how it's supposed to be. It hasn't been like this for over ten years. Hell, not even 20," said Jinx. He stormed over to me and grabbed my shoulder, spinning me around.
I know I was told to stay out of this guy's way. But he wasn't staying out of mine.
"Is there a problem?" I asked.
"Oh, no," Rock muttered when I said that. I heard people throughout the giant cafeteria start muttering small things. Shit. I shouldn't have said anything.
He leaned forward and grabbed a fistful of my shirt, then yanked me out of my seat. He pulled me up to his face and glared at me for a minute.
"The only problem, sweetheart, is you talking back to me," he growled. He let go of my shirt and roughly shoved me back into my chair before walking out of the room.
Everyone was completely silent. The entire room. No one moved.
"Girl, you's absolutely fuckin' insane," Shag finally said.
"And absolutely fucking lucky," said Red.
"If any of us had said anything like that, we'd still be getting beat senseless," said Blaze.
"Oh shit. I get it now. That's what you meant in line. You're the one who made the food," Big said.
"I, uh... yeah," I said.
"HELL YEAH!" some dude screamed from the back of the cafeteria. Everyone broke into chatter again, the room resuming to its normal noise level.
"Damn, if they liked you before, they really like you now," said Jake.
"Shit slaps," said Corey.
"Slaps? What kind of fucking words do you guys use?" Blaze asked.
"He's from Canada," Sam quickly said. That was the stupidest fucking excuse I'd ever heard, but I couldn't have come up with a better one.
"Oh. Makes sense," Blaze said, starting on his food. Me and the trap guys all suppressed our laughter, completely amazed that that excuse worked.
We ate our lunch, everyone much happier with this food than whatever they usually got on Fridays. Throughout the meal, the Center guys would occasionally chuckle in disbelief that I'd spoken to Jinx like that with no consequence.
Considering how amazed they were that I wasn't getting repeatedly kicked on the floor, I decided I shouldn't do that again. Ever.
It was yard time after that. I watched eight of the guys play some basketball while Rock was the referee. I was sitting on the side of the court in the dirt, my back leaned up against the tall chain link fence sporting coils of razor wire at the top. I barely noticed Ray walk over.
"Can I sit?" he asked. I nodded in response. He plopped down next to me and started plucking some blades of grass. "You've got some guts. You know that?"
"I gathered that from everyone's reaction," I said.
"You're new. You don't know how dangerous that was," said Ray.
"I won't do it again," I replied.
"Good. But if you do and you get away with it? For a second time? Man. Everyone's going to be kissing the ground you walk on," he answered.
"They sort of already do that," I chuckled.
"Can I ask why you did it?" he asked.
"I was told to stay out of his way but he had no intention of staying out of mine," I said with a shrug.
"No, not that. Why'd you embezzle all of that money?" he asked.
"Oh!" I said. Shit, I needed a backstory for this stuff. "I, uh... I didn't. I was an intern there before I started full time and I was trained to do it the wrong way. The last secretary hated the boss, so she taught me how to do it wrong. To the best of my knowledge, I was doing it right. But seven years down the road, I've ended up in a maximum security prison for just about the rest of my life."
"Hm. You know, a lot of men in here insist that they're innocent. But you? I actually believe it," Ray said.
"Then why does everyone treat me like I'm such a big deal?" I asked.
"Oh, no. They definitely all think you're guilty. Or they want to, at least. I guess you did technically do it, though. You just didn't know," Ray pointed out.
"I suppose," I replied. "So why'd you do it?" I asked, laughing. He stared down at the dirt ground and shook his head.
"You know much about Hitler?" Ray asked. That certainly wasn't what I had expected to hear.
"Yes. Probably a lot more than you do," I said. That was definitely true.
"He was a sort of... role model for me, I guess. Not what he did. Not the holocaust, I mean. Killing that many people for no reason? Yikes," said Ray. Uh, hello? What was your reason, then?
"I just mean his presence. The way he climbed to the top, took life and the world in his hands. He had an image for how he wanted things to be, and he made those things a reality the best he could," explained Ray. Seriously? He liked Hitler because of his 'image' for the world? He could have gone with JFK or something. Hell, even Nixon was way better than Hitler.
"And your image was to be a racist white supremacist that needed to kill one of the most influential civil rights activists of all time?" I asked, looking over at him. He shrugged.
"Basically, yeah," he said.
Words could not describe how much I wanted to punch this man. To scream at him, to jump on his fucking head, to kick him in the balls. But I couldn't. Not yet, at least. I needed him, as much as I didn't want to.
"Well that's quite possibly the worst thing I've ever heard a human being say in my life," I said in an even tone.
"Then you need to listen more, angel," he said with a laugh. I looked up to see Colby and Big walking over to us.
"Hey there," I said.
"Hi," Colby said, sitting on the other side of me.
"Ray," Big said.
"Dennis," Ray replied. Big's face slowly twisted up until it was clear that he was pissed off.
"Well, that's my cue to leave. Bye, angel," Ray said, patting my knee before walking away.
"What a disgusting excuse of a human," I said when he was out of earshot.
"You're telling me. Dude's been stabbed too many times to count. Lord knows how he hasn't died yet," said Big. "Why are you letting him talk to you like that? If you don't want him to waltz right up to you, I can certainly tell him not to."
"No, no. It's fine," I said. "I hate the guy. I do. But he's... I don't know. He's interesting. I guess if I'm stuck here, I might as well try to figure out what drives a man to do something so damn terrible." That wasn't true. I just needed him to think we were friends.
Colby gave me a small smile and nodded.
"Alright. If you're okay, I'm going to go play again. You in, Brock?" Big asked.
"Nah. Let Rock play. I'll sit this one out," said Colby. Big nodded in response and ran back to the court, leaving Colby and me alone.
"You're so fucking good. With these excuses and stories and shit," Colby said.
"I sort of have to be," I sighed.
"Hey, babe?" Colby asked.
"Hm?" I asked.
"Never, ever do that again. With Jinx, I mean. If he comes at you, I'm not going to be able to stop myself from coming at him, and it'll just be a whole mess. Plus people would probably figure out we're dating," he said.
"Yeah, I know," I sighed.
"I really wish we didn't have to hide that," Colby said.
"At least we get to share a cell," I pointed out.
"Yes. Thank god for that," he laughed.