Hey everyone! This is my new story, I really hope you guys all like it and comment. I have written up like nine pages of this already (guess I got carried away a little bit). So if you like it just leave me a comment and or vote and I will put up all the other parts one by one. Until then I will try and write some more on my other stories which for some reason I'm not having fun writing anymore. But I will try I promise! Please vote and comment because I can't wait to see what you guys think of it :)
Just Look At Me Now
I just lay there on my bed dreading the school day ahead. I was up early as always, because I was asleep early and the reason I went to bed early on a Sunday was because I have a lack of something; I think people call it a ‘social life’. Now it isn’t that I don’t have friends, I do and they are the most amazing and most supportive people you will ever find. Wes and Vanessa. They’re both confident and outgoing; they enjoy their lives and do the stupidest things. Most of all they were the only ones who took me in when I transferred to Phoenix from Seattle into their High School halfway through freshman year.
Now, they’ve invited me over to a countless amount of events and sure I disappoint them every time I give them a straight ‘no’. You would think after two years of knowing me, they would just simply learn to not ask me anymore. But no they still do. And it hurts every time I give them an answer, which hasn’t changed for two years, and the pained looks they get on their faces.
The reason I bear it, all of it is because I’m overweight. There. I said it. I’m fat and ugly and I have very little confidence in myself. The reason I say no every time is because it brings back memories from my past. It opens up this little black box that I have managed to bury deep, deep inside of me. Afraid that if it opens up again, I might not be as lucky as I was the first time.
Just as I was about to burry myself underneath into my duvets, Costa, my maid comes bustling in.
“Morning Miss Rohannie (Ronnie).” This plump old woman was always smiling at me and when I was crying, telling me that everything would be okay. She had been there for every single moment in my life, best or worst, important or not. She was like a mother to me.
You see I’m the only one living at home. Except for Costa. It’s just the two of us, before you go assuming the worst; my parents are both alive and healthy, living in Seattle in my old home. They both are so partners in an extremely large business company that they have been running. They didn’t ship me away because they didn’t want me to be seen as their fat daughter. They sent me here because I asked them to. They both begged and cried for me to stay, but I just couldn’t let them suffer for my wrong doings, I had hurt them, but for their best I knew. Soon they agreed to let me live here with Costa as long as they were updated about everything that I was doing in my life and if I went to see a phycologist every week. They didn’t want to send me over after the incident but in the end I think they understood where I was coming from.
“ So should I set up the computer so that you can talk to your parents?’
“ That’s okay. I forgot to shut it last night.” I grudgingly made my way across my room (which was quite large) and moved the desktop. Just on time, my skype accounts' ring went off and I opened up a video confrence with my parents.
“ Hey mom. Hey dad.”
“Morning sweetie. How are things? Are you ready for your first day as a junior?”
“ No, not really. I’m well, afraid actually.”
“ Honey,” my dad interjected “ You’ve been there for a while now, and you’re a strong person. You won’t let a few jab of words get in your way will you? You need to learn to live your life fully.”
“ I know dad, I know, it just still feels a little fresh you know?”
“ Pain like that doesn’t go away fast darling. But you need to start loosing weight soon.”
“How much have you lost so far Ron?”
“ Around 22 pounds in the last summer vacation.”
“ Honey! That’s a great achievement! What are you down to now?”
“ 160 pounds. But you know, I’m still overweight right? I mean I’m short so the weight is proportional.” I stood at only a short 5’1 I guess I just stopped growing in that direction after a while.
“ We know. But you only started sweetie. You can’t expect results like that. And you do know that this is the best way. We didn’t want you to go through the surgery.”
“ Neither did I mom. I just didn’t think it would be this hard.” My eyes started to water and my voice choked up a little.
“ Why don’t you come back? We could hire a personal trainer for you.”
I took a deep breath to calm myself.
" No dad, I’m going to do this myself. And I’m going to stay here for a while, just get used to it.”
“ We have darling. We just wanna help anyway we can.”
“ Just be supportive like you always have been.” I managed a smile for them both. “ Well I should go get ready now. I’ll talk to you after school I guess.”
“ Bye Hun.”
“ Bye mom.”
“ Bye bird.” I smiled, “Bye dad.”
After a cool shower, I tied my long brown curly hair back and proceeded to put on a shirt with a jumper and some yoga pants with slippers. I walked downstairs and got my new healthy breakfast from Costa. After finishing my oatmeal and glass of orange juice, I grabbed the keys to my ‘66 ford convertible in a cream colour. It was my pride and joy; I just enjoyed cleaning it and looking after it while Nessa and Wes were out having a good time.
Playing my mixed CD I made my way towards something which I like to call ‘hell’. Well it was my personal one anyway.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Just as I shut my locker, I was hit over the head with a textbook.
“OW!” I exclaimed and turned around to see that Vanessa was the culprit.
“ That was for missing out on our ‘ We’re becoming juniors so lets go and get wasted before we actually do party’. “
“ Please don’t tell me you actually called it that.”
“She actually did” Wes said slinging an arm over my shoulder casually.
His action made me blush deep red to my embarrassment. It wasn’t entirely my fault. I just kind of had a little crush on Wes. I mean I think every girl in this school kind of did. Well except for Vanessa. And she told me that she would totally ‘tap that’ if she were into guys. Yep. Those were the exact words used when she came up to me and ‘fessed up about her sexuality.
But it’s so cool to have a lesbian friend, and surprisingly, she is one of the most popular girls in school. Not like the others of course, she was popular because she was nice, and Wes because he was a basketball player. He just says that he would rather hang out with his two favourite girls rather than dumbass jocks. Even though some of his friends are way nice and way hot.
“Okay well you two have fun in drama. I’m off to workshop. See y’all at lunch.” And with that Wes was off. And I was left with Vanessa staring at me.
“You have got to get over him. Honestly, if he doesn’t care about you right now, why would he ever care? In that way I mean. Seeing you’re just so adamant about not telling him about how you feel.”
“ Well that’s, because A) he would be so much happier with someone more preppy B) I’m not even sure that I like him that way, I mean its just a crush and C) look at him and look at me!”
“ Not that, I’m not good enough crap okay? You are an amazing person, inside and out you need to realise that.”
“ You’re one to talk I mean you’re like one of the hottest girl in this school”
And she was, her long willowy frame stood at a tall 5’6 and her auburn hair was cut in the tilted bob her clear blue eyes glinted. She really looked like a supermodel. She waved her hand around as if trying to brush it off but I knew she was flattered; I smirked.
I had decided to take drama as something which would help me gain confidence this year, I mean next year, I was going to be a senior and hopefully more confident and secretly, slimmer.
Mr. Klemmer walked in with a bunch of scripts. Oh goody a play! I actually quite enjoyed them even though I always wanted the lead; I obviously never tried out for them. I would just stay backstage and help the magic happen instead be a part of it I guess.
“ Hey guys. Okay so this year, I thought we would kick it off with an amazing musical. Hopefully we’ll perform it at the beginning of next semester. Now I was thinking a romance and have an open audition instead of juts us drama kids doing the performance?But now you’re going to have a lot of competition seeing anyone can audition. Now, I know you probably want to know what musical we’re doing?” He was answered with a lot of yeses from the class.
“ Okay, okay. Now, I thought we might do the great 'romantic’ musical, Cry Baby. The one with Johnny Depp? I thought it might be a fun one to do. So here are your scripts, I want EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU to audition okay? You have to take part in it no matter what, cause it will go towards you’re grade. We are putting a lot of effort into this.”
“Oh my god!” I yelped. “ That movie is AH-MAY-ZING. I swear I fell in love with Johnny Depp when I watched that film.”
“ Eh? I’ve never even heard of it. And from the expressions from everyone else in this room, I don’t think they have either.”
“ Really? That movie is so hilarious! I mean it’s so wrong its right. I watched it with…” Alan. My face dropped.
“ With who?” Nessa stared at me
“ Oh just a friend in Seattle.” I brushed it off.
“ So you’re trying out for the lead role.” Nessa stated.
“ What? No! Why would I do that?” I mean I couldn’t even think about it. Could I really stand in front of all those people? Even the thought made me sweat.
“ Why not? I mean you obviously know the musical, and you’ll enjoy it, I mean you’re good, you just never ever try out for this kind of stuff. And you have a good voice you know. I’ve heard you sing at home, in the shower.”
“ That’s in the shower Ness. Its different in front of people.”
“ Well you’re gonna have to do it anyway, I mean its for your grade, so why not just try out for the main character? It’ll be fun and if you don’t get it then you can just work backstage like you always do.” Nessa shrugged.
I thought about it. Maybe, I should. Like dad said, start living my life, how long was I going to let my weight get into the way of me enjoying myself?
“ Okay.” I whispered.
“What?"
“ I said OKAY.”
“ Oh my god!” Nessa stood up and yelped throwing her hands into the air. “ You are finally doing something un-boring! That’s my girl.” She patted me on the back taking her seat again, ignoring all the weird looks she was getting from everyone in the class.
“ I do fun stuff.” I protested.
“ Cleaning your car isn’t fun Ronny.” She said exasperated.
“ Well it is for me.” I mumbled and Vanessa rolled her eyes, smiling.
Mr. K continued, “ Okay so, try outs are next Friday, I want you guys to start making some posters this lesson to put up on boards. And your homework is to watch Cry Baby. Right,” he said clapping his hands together “ Disperse and make yourselves useful.” Everyone laughed at his attempt to be strict and spread out around the theatre, some even went off to the library or walked out of class.
“Okay lets get this over with.” I grumbled, I wasn’t very good at art
“ Hey, isn’t Wes training today?”
“ Mhmm. I think so.”
“ You mind if we watch? He’s my ride.”
“ I could drop you off if you’d like you know.”
“ Naw I live like on the other side of your house, just wait with me will you? It’ll only take and hour and a half. I feel weird watching hot sweaty guys shirtless.”
“ Of course. You would.’
“ No shit,” she laughed, “ I would rather watch the girls volleyball team.” She winked
“ Eww” I laughed along with her.