Friday, June 5th, 2020
My parents had signed the forms, informing the school that today would be my last day. They'd had a meeting this morning to discuss what happened with Aubrey.
It was safe to say that dad wasn't happy that no one had been able to stop it. He also wanted Aubrey to be expelled but I was able to explain to him that that wasn't fair. Aubrey had lost her brother because of Nix and despite having anger issues, she was just hurting.
It was lunch and instead of eating, I was cleaning out my locker. My parents had driven me to school today and had said they'd pick me up. I wasn't complaining because my bag would be heavy, but I knew that they were starting to get overprotective again. They were scared that people at school might hurt me.
I guess I didn't blame them.
I sorted through everything, throwing out sheets of old tests I wouldn't need. I rummage through my maths folder and spot a note Harry had given me once. I smooth it out as much as I can but its crumbled and old. The ink as smudged slightly, but I can just read what it says.
Song recommendation: The Night We Met by Lord Huron.
I smile at the memory, running my hands over his neat handwriting.
He'd randomly passed it to me during math class a few months ago. I had pretended that I'd never heard of the song, just so I could get him to tell me all about how good it was. Hearing his voice was enough for me.
Unexpected tears well up in my eyes. I fold up the note neatly, pocketing it. It crinkles in my blazer pocket as I move to wipe my tears.
Someone leans against the locker next to me. I jump, knocking my shoulder against my door.
"You're clearing out your locker?"
I turn away from Kennedy, wiping my teary eyes. I don't turn back to her until I know I won't cry.
"Yeah. I'm leaving."
Kennedy's expression falters momentarily. I almost see a hint of remorse and regret before she covers it up, her expression stoic.
"Where are you going?" she asks, turning towards me.
"Well, my mum got a new job. My parents want a fresh start. Again."
She's quiet for a moment, watching me carefully. "When?"
"We're moving sometime next week. But they've already enrolled me at my new school, so I've gotta clear everything out today."
"They don't muck around then, huh?"
I shake my head, grabbing the last of my books. "No. They're adamant that we start again as quickly as possible."
"So, that—"
"Hey, Ken. I was— oh. Lonnie. Hi."
Sydney comes up next to Kennedy, clearing her throat. She stares at me awkwardly, picking at a thread on her school jumper.
"Hey," I whisper, zipping my bag closed. The only thing left now was the books I needed for my final class.
"You're— you're leaving?" Sydney asks.
"I guess it was inevitable," I shrug. "Secrets always get out. Aubrey just sped up the process for me."
They're both silent as I place my bag back in my locker. "Do you want to leave?" Sydney asks.
"I— well, it's complicated," I answer, pulling my sleeves over my hands.
Kennedy rubs her forehead like this conversation is giving her a headache. "I never got to say how sorry I was. About the newspaper article. I promise I didn't tell my mum about you. I think it was Aubrey who tipped off the paper."
"It's alright, Kennedy. What's done is done. I just want to move on."
"By running away?" Sydney chides.
I look away, down the hall. People were milling around. Some were staring and me. Some were glaring and pointing. But no one was spitting. No one was shoving me against lockers and telling me to rot in hell.
It might not have been perfect, but I was going to miss Bakley High.
"It's not up to me," I answer. "My parents have made up their minds."
"You're eighteen, Lonnie. You don't have to listen to them anymore."
I shake my head. "So, what? I just say that I'm staying? I don't have a job. I don't have a place to live. My parents are the adults here and if they want to leave, then I just have to accept that."
Kennedy shakes her head. "You're a passenger in your own life. Why don't you fight to stay if you want to?"
I shut my locker door, placing a hand on my hip. "I wanted to stay, alright? But if I think about it, do I have any reason to? There's nothing left for me here. If my parents don't stay, why should I?"
I wanted her to tell me that if I stayed, they'd all be here for me. But that was unrealistic. I'd hurt them too much.
"So this is it?" Sydney asks, her voice soft.
"Hey! We've been looking everywhere for—"
We all turn to see Cooper and Ash walking down the hallway. They're grinning but they both hesitate when they see that the girls are talking to me.
I clear my throat, turning my combination to lock the door. I pretend to take longer than I need to, avoiding eye contact.
"What's, ah... what's going on?" Cooper stammers, rubbing the back of his neck.
"I'm leaving. Today's my last day," I respond. "Don't worry, you won't have to see my face ever again."
It was supposed to be a light-hearted comment, but everyone stares as me like I've just kicked their dog.
"Lonnie," Kennedy sighs. I expect her to say more, but she stays quiet, staring at me sadly.
"Harry hasn't— he isn't back at school yet?" I question, my chest tightening.
The answer is written in their silence as they all look at each other.
"He's— he'll be back soon," Asher speaks, nodding his head like he's trying to believe his own words.
Remembering something important, I turn back to my locker, reopening it and unzipping the front pocket of my bag.
"Well, um, could you— could you maybe give him this?" I produce an envelope with Harry's name written across it.
Asher reaches for it, nodding.
"I, um, wrote something for all of you," I read each name on the envelopes, passing the letters out to everyone.
I'd each written them a personal letter about how they'd changed my life over the past months. I wanted them to know that they'd always be my best friends no matter what happened. If I never saw them again, they'd still hold a special place in my heart.
They all stare down at the envelopes like they can't quite work out what to do.
The bell rings, signalling the end of lunch. Everyone seems to come out of their daze, putting away the letters.
"So, anyway," I speak. "I guess— thanks for everything."
I look around the small circle we had created, completely blocking out the rest of the people milling around.
I watch Cooper as he slings his arm around Kennedy, his mouth pulled down in sadness. I look at Sydney as she watches me intently, listening to what I say. I observe Asher, his eyes never leaving mine. And Kennedy, her eyes full of concern.
"I'll never forget you guys," I croak, my eyes welling up with tears. "I'll never forget how much you helped me without even knowing it. I know that you probably don't think very highly of me right now, but I was just trying to protect you from the truth. I was afraid of hurting you all because I care. A lot.
"You guys are the best friends that I have ever had. So, yeah. I guess— I guess this is...goodbye."
I quickly grab my books, before closing my locker. I turn back to them briefly, trying to memorise their faces so that I could always remember this moment.
"Good luck with everything," I finish, stepping away from the circle. I turn away, hugging my books to my chest as I will the tears to stay in my eyes.
If I never got to see any of them again, at least I could say that I'd known them once. That was enough for me, knowing that friends who were your soulmates were out there.
I'd never forget them. Never.