[Riley]
Messages
· Nasty Naz 8:36 a.m.
So, best weekend of your life or not? I'll bring lunch to your office before you two fly out to Charlotte Saturday and you can tell me everything!
· Mike Shiggity 8:40 a.m.
Tell me you said yes, 'cause it's about damn time, bruh.
· Les 9:02 a.m.
FACETIME ME IMMEDIATELY! I MUST SEE THE RING UP CLOSE, BITCH.
· Donny 9:15 a.m.
Riley Davina Coleman – Cole, is it?
· Pain in my Ass 10:01 a.m.
I'm stuck with you as a sister forever now? That might not be too bad, Coleman. Or are you Cole now? Lil Cole would be the little one.
· Pain in my Ass 10:01 a.m.
Ah shit, LIL COLE LIVES!
The second Lamarr and I powered our phones on from our weekend getaway, text message after text message and voicemail alerts lit up both home screens like wildfire. Family and friends were flooding our line and inboxes with congratulations, and the abundance of excitement felt from them all was valued yet shocking for me to see so soon. I hadn't informed anyone about our engagement, but from the tone of each message and all the kind words I could assume everyone knew about this surprise before I even did.
That was when everything clicked. Lamarr had clearly been planning this for some time now and had all our loved ones in the know, anticipating the aftermath and waiting for the second one of us made this engagement official. Funny thing about it all was that literally no one waited, they all figured things went perfectly and were sending their blessings either way.
For the first thirty minutes I elaborated on the basic details of my weekend and every other second Leslie was interrupting with questions she just had to have answered. She demanded to know what I wore here, did we do this there, how did I respond to this, and did I eat that. Literally everything I shared needed an explanation. My girl was itching to relive each day and its events, the dinner that Lamarr planned seamlessly, and even more the conclusion of my weekend that ended like a Jill Scott and Beyoncé slow tempo love song warped together.
Now we were both on a high, floating on a cloud in complete awe. I was still allowing this new shift sink in while Leslie was now merely amazed by my ring and 'glow' she noted from miles away.
"Good lord. You and that damn thing are just gorgeous," Leslie eyes admired the emerald stone that gleamed beside my cheek as I held my hand up, and wiggled by ring finger beside it. The sun shining brightly above accentuated its size through the camera and the extra touch the diamonds outlining it gave. "It looks even better on your hand than it does in iMessage."
"Wait, you've seen it before now?"
"Of course," she said with her forehead furrowed. "Why wouldn't I? I mean, who else was Cole going to go to for approval of the ring other than your best friend? Anyways, he sent me a picture of it first. I loved it, he bought it and I love it even more now that its sitting on your finger screaming fuck your life."
"Oh, well alright Drake." I lobbed back smartly as we both began laughing at her slick usage of his classic lyrics. Out of habit I palmed my stomach and began caressing it as my eyes fell, tracing the movement and the two symbols solidifying just an ounce of the love I held. I was sinking into my own little world again, but in the distance I could still hear the whispers of Leslie's voice questioning what was on my mind.
"I can't believe this is actually happening. I can't believe I promised to be someone's wife and mother."
"It's never too late to take it back, you know. Well, the wife part." she quickly recapped with a shrug.
"But I don't wanna," I pouted playfully. "It's not that I don't want to be a mom or Lamarr's wife, it's just that I allowed fear to keep me so far removed from genuine and unconditional love to the point I never actually saw any of this happening for me."
"That you did," Leslie mumbled as I sucked my teeth and shot her a glare. Though that was my reality, I didn't need her agreeing with it. She was rubbing it in. "What? Bitch, now you know you were out here training for the got damn Olympics with the way you used to jet the hell off on Lamarr. You ran off on the plug twice, Ry! Hell. Make that three times! Would've been four but you knew better."
"Your point is?"
"My point is, a person like you deserves the abundance of happiness that has come into your life." Leslie stalled her rant and sighed as she shook her head and took a second to, what seemed like, gather herself. I couldn't decipher her reaction. I didn't know if she was frustrated or from the silence and sudden tears brimming her eyes, sad.
"I'm just so happy for you. You might not have saw any of this coming, but I did. You just had to evolve and be ready to accept it. I'm glad you're finally accepting it."
"Leslie, I need you and your hormones to knock it off. I can not do the crying," I warned as I looked away from the camera and over my shoulder where the sound of rattling keys could be heard. While she continued to sniffle into the speakerphone, Lamarr was stumbling inside with tons of bags in each hand. My attention was visually captured by him as I wondered what the hell he bought, all while still stuck on Leslie and her mood swing.
"I refuse to join in on the water works, ma'am."
"I'm sorry, girl. I can't really help it." she protested weakly as she wiped at her cheeks. "I'm either mean, crying or both these days."
"I know all too well what you're going through. Still, clean yourself up so I can turn back around."
"Skank, give me a second!" Leslie shot back with chuckle, her sniffles still stifling her urge to cease her tears. "You're my person and whenever you're happy, I'm happy. These are tears of joy." she swore just as Lamarr joined me out on the balcony and leaned down into the camera to greet her.
"Cruella De Vil, how you? Your mascara is all smudged."
"Slenderman. I'm great now that your fiancé has helped me stop sobbing like the punk my mama did not raise me to be. How about you?" she posed the question with a smirk as she dabbed her finger along her cheekbone. "Word around town is you're my brother in law for real now."
"You should already know how I'm feeling. A month ago I told you I was nervous, but determined to do the one thing that's far more important to me than selling records, and with the one person it makes sense to do it with." Lamarr paused for a moment and peered down at me, our eyes immediately locking before his tongue rolled on and face lit up. "Now that it's come to fruition, I'm the happiest man in the world."
It seemed like a grin had been permanently plastered to my face all weekend, and Lamarr's need to express his love yet again with his God given talent so purely had it broadening. My insides were swelling beyond my baby and with saccharine; this excessively sweet and sentimental feeling, that mush.
"Why are you so perfect?" I asked lowly and only audible to us as my palm inched closer to his face to caress the stubble on his cheek.
"You make it easy," Lamarr disclosed as he bent down and joined us with a kiss. The taste of cherry, particularity that of a Jolly Rancher, lingered on my lips as he slowly but surely deepened the interaction with each brush. It was clear we had forgotten Leslie's presence until a loud clap of her hands broke our lock. My head dropped down once we pulled away from each other, leaving Lamarr chuckling as he swiped his thumb along his bottom lip.
"My fault, big hair don't care. I forgot you were still on the line," he teased as Leslie waved him and his new nickname off. "Aw, don't do me like that."
"Yeah, whatever. You all are sickening, just so you know. Disgusting," she hissed then exaggerated a gag. "I saw this all coming, last year when you chased her outside that club. I knew what it would lead to, I saw it! But I'm always knowing though. Anyways, I've had enough of your baby mama for now so I'll let you two love birds be."
"Well thank you, Leslie."
"No problem, Cole. Send my god baby some love, okay?" she directed to us both before blowing multiple kisses in my direction. Lamarr rose and walked over to the balcony rail with his gaze locked on the city outline ahead, giving us a few extra seconds of privacy to end our conversation. "I can't wait to see you guys on New Year's Eve."
"We can't either. You just make sure to take care of yourself and keep holding it down up there in NYC for me. Don't let those moods swings win, alright? I love you,"
"Love you too Ry." Leslie said as a precursor to end the call.
Though I was comfortable laying back in this new outdoor recliner Lamarr bought me, I found myself planting my feet onto decking and walking toward him. He remained engaged in the scenery with his arms crossed, fingers lazily stroking his chin. He was still enough for me to ease in, snake my arms around his waist and rest my head on his back; just what he needed for his body to relax.
"What's on Cole's mind now?" Lamarr snickered to himself as he shook his head.
"Nothing heavy, this weather is just conducive to creating ideas. While I was out today I kept hearing this one word over and over again, and suddenly while just existing right here in this spot at this moment, I have a whole song." he openly shared without hesitation. "My brain is pasting it together and waiting for me to write it down."
"I wish I had your brain,"
"No you don't," he chuckled lightly. "It's too much shit going on up there, too many random thoughts and concepts to all kind of things. Sometimes too much for me to decipher through."
"But you still manage to, and the things you've created as a result have been amazing. That's your genius and only yours. I just be wanting a little peak, understand a lil bit." I teased as Lamarr glanced over his shoulder at me with a smile. He shifted his body around within our embrace and hugged my hips. "What was the word that you kept hearing? If you don't mind me asking."
"Mine," he said simply.
"Interesting. When you write out the song and record it, you think I can hear it?"
"Nope," The emphasizes he added on to the p had me poking my lips out, practically sulking at his need to hide his music process from me – it was a first for us. "I'm also sure what it becomes will be put on the next album so you can just wait until then. Whenever, that is. Probably sometime next year once the baby is born. Until then I'm just writing and recording,"
"That's not fair, you know?"
"To who?" Lamarr challenged with a smirk. "Oh, just you. Sorry, baby girl, but this one is personal."
"Forest Hills was personal too but I helped you write songs for it and even listened to some in advance. What's the difference now?"
"A year," he said without a second thought. At first I assumed he was being sarcastic and would reveal his true reasoning behind his choice immediately after. Instead Lamarr remained unmoved with a grave expression and firm on his explanation. "This one is already unfolding naturally for me. I woke up with a theme in mind and now almost every day I'm digging into layers of myself I never knew existed. I'm exploring a new sound, a new me and I don't think I'll be ready for anyone to hear it until the release date. I probably still won't be ready then."
"Well in that case, I'll let you have your privacy. I'll leave you be." I promised as he nodded and mouthed thank you back. "How about we go inside now."
"Yeah let's do that. Even with the sun beaming it's mad chilly," he groaned, pulling away just enough to get a glimpse at my attire that looked almost identical to his, minus my slippers compared to his Pumas. "Glad to see that you're not being a rebel and decided to throw on a sweatshirt."
"Well of course. I knew my baby daddy would have a fit if I didn't. We're matching," I pointed out as I stood back completely, then gave a quick spin that ended with me holding up the center of the hoodie that read Dreamville. "You see that? Let Ari know that I'm also the first lady of it, we can take turns. I'm off on the weekend though."
"I'll let her know," Lamarr muttered. "Yo, you've got a lot of titles now. Writer, A&R, music connoisseur, founder of a music label. Shit, you're even an executive since you call all the major shots for the label. You're a mommy, wife-to-be, executive director of the Dreamville Foundation and word around town is you're lowkey producer. Now a first lady? You're just a renaissance woman, huh?"
"You forgot that I'm a dancer unlike yourself. I'm also a goddess, the embodiment of the divine feminine. Oh, and ya girl might just be a soul snatcher." I added arrogantly, attempting to fight back a smirk as Lamarr's brow rose in shock. "Don't hurt yourself acting like you don't know."
"Well shit, my fault."
"Yeah, your fault." I jeered and grabbed his hand to lure us both inside. All the amusement I was riding on slowly died the second I saw, and out of force of habit, counted all fifteen of the bags scattered along the living room.
Lamarr was meant to go to the store and buy extra Christmas lights for the tree we chose to decorate for the holidays. From the looks of things, he purchased way more, and stuff we probably didn't need.
"Now Lama--"
"Before you start," he interjected as I waited impatiently with my hands on my hips for his excuse. "Let me explain myself. So I was at Macy's and went straight to the seasonal section for the lights like I had planned, but while I was there I saw some stockings and figured, let me grab a couple of those to hang over our fireplace and on the doors. But then I also saw some decorated wreaths and thought, oh shit! Those would be dope too. After adding all that to the shopping bag I had, I remembered we needed a star or angel for the top of the tree. Who decorates an entire Christmas tree and leaves off an angel? I wasted like fifteen minutes alone trying to find a black one. You know they only had one black one?" he asked rhetorically as my lips parted to interrupt him, but not before he did just that to me. "They had her hidden on the back of a clearance shelf, Ry. That's disrespectful as hell."
"Lamarr..."
"I'm not done," he held his hand up and raced off toward a huddle of bags where he started to take different items out of each, some he had yet to mention. "After that I realized we needed some more ornaments too. In the midst of grabbing a box or two I remember I needed some boxer briefs and basketball shorts so you know, that leads me upstairs where I fucked around and bought mad socks and t-shirts. I didn't forget about you though."
"You better not have," I mumbled under my breath and began to mirror his exact movements. That's where I found all the decorations he listed and attempted to finish embellishing the living room while my ears were still hooked to his voice. "What'd you get me?"
"Those camis you sleep in sometimes and of course," Lamarr glanced over at me near the fire place with a mischievous grin on his face, and off the bat I knew exactly what it was, "granny panties!" We both blurted in unison.
"Thank you, babe. I love those fugly things now, they're so comfortable."
"I know you do. Now about this other stuff..." His words hung in the air. "You can't flip out, aight? Promise me that you won't."
"Oh boy. Just spill it, Cole."
"I might have bought some bottles, pacifiers, bibs and other unimportant things like a tub and highchair to be exact." he rambled off then bit his bottom lip. "Also, there may be a registry up and running for the baby at Macy's too."
"You made one without me?" I immediately froze in place, arms dangling in the air with ornaments in my hands as my head swung his way. "No wonder you were gone for three damn hours! Lamarr that's supposed to be something we do as a couple, parents, a family. I feel left out."
"Chill, baby girl. We can start one together at another store, your choice. I just couldn't help myself, it was fun scanning shit," he confessed innocently as I sighed and decided this was major yet way too miniscule to stress over.
Lamarr strolled over to me and grabbed the two glittery snowflakes from my hands as my shoulders slumped in relief. "How did you even know what to scan?"
"This middle-aged lady named Debbie who manages kids recommended some products she felt were the best of quality for a newborn. Then she showed me all the other must-haves they'll need in their first couple of months down to the entire first year. She was pretty nice," he muttered as I moved out of his way to adorn the rest of the room. "Very helpful. Almost five-thousand dollars in the hole helpful."
"Mhm, glad we're not the ones buying most of this stuff. Well, I hope not." I quickly corrected as my mind slowly wandered off to the fact it was December but felt like May. I was still trying to adjust to the climate change though it wasn't easy, and feel at home in my new home during a season that by my norm was known for snow and below zero temperatures.
"This all feels so weird." I murmured.
"What?" Lamarr wondered with a bit of worry in his tone. "The baby?"
I quickly shook my head to calm his concern, "I was talking about winter time in LA. There's no snow, this cold compared to New York and Chicago's feels like spring time and it's just strange. I suppose that's why we're still giving the house a holiday touch with all this extra shit you decided to waste money on."
"I peeped game baby girl and that was shade." Lamarr accused. "You're right though. That's exactly why, and also why we're flying out of here and heading to Charlotte this week. North Carolina with Kay Cole feels a little bit more like the holidays, trust me."
"And yet y'all don't get snow either unless you're in the mountains."
"We get more than California!" He snickered as I pursed my lips not believing him the least bit. The more we conversed the faster we seemed to clear the couch, it was a useful technique. "By the way, I bought all my Christmas gifts today too. So don't go being nosy in that shopping bag sitting in the hallway."
"Thanks for the warning, I'll definitely peek inside now." I retorted smartly, making him suck his teeth. "Did you get your mom something too? Because if not, negro I'll fight you."
"Yes I did, so mind your business. We need to wrap all our gifts and drop or mail them off since we'll be gone for a week." he reminded as he picked up the plastic box holding the topper for the tree. Lamarr opened it up completely then stretched his arm out, placing the angel directly at the tip without any trouble. "You know, you never told me what you wanted for Christmas other than what I already got you."
"That's because I don't want anything."
"Lie again,"
"I'm serious," I argued as I grabbed the bundle of wreaths to hang around anyhow near the kitchen and front door. "All I want is a gift from myself to myself, which is actually more like a goal than a gift. I need - want to finish my website and make it available to the world-wide web by the top of the year. I'm just running into a couple of road blocks though, so that may not happen so soon."
"Issues like what?"
I wagged my finger with Lamarr's intentions in mind and stopped him before he got ahead of himself. "Cole, I know what you're doing. Don't worry about it, I'll figure it out myself."
"You talking like you can read my mind, like we're twin flames or some shit. You don't know me, woman." he teased as he ditched the boxes of lights on the floor, leaving them for later then plopped down on the couch. As Lamarr's back sunk into the cushions, he patted the space beside him as a clear invitation to keep him company.
"Seriously, is this website for your label?"
"No, it's my personal website for branding purposes," I explained, draping the last garland on the front of the coat closet. I was tempted to end it there until I looked over my shoulder to see a quiet Lamarr gesturing for me to press on. "And...and it also serves as a blog where I plan to share more of myself. I want it to be a source for black women to connect and communicate on. I want them to read my experiences whether their personal or universal, be able to relate to them, express their own testimonies and heal. I want them to have a space where they can be free, which is why I want to add a small message board too."
"You never told me you were trying to do all this. How come?" I shrugged as I made it over to the couch to sit down and chucked my legs onto his lap.
"I don't know. Maybe because I wanted to do this on my own and surprise everyone with it. Too bad it's not working out how I planned or nearly as easy as the label's website did."
"But it could," he countered as his soft palms instinctively began rubbing up and down my calves. This had become the one thing that easily relaxed me over the last couple of weeks, and it was more so his touch alone than the actual action. "So now you're obligated to tell me what the issue is other than your stubbornness. And let's be clear, I'll keep bugging you about it so you might as well just say it, Ry."
"It's money," I disclosed bluntly. "What I have envisioned, outlined and what's being created as we speak by this web designer I hired is just awfully expensive. That's without the interactive application for smart phones I want to fashion with it. Together they'll empty my pockets. With everything that's goin--"
"Just show me what you have so far, tell me what else you need and I'll handle the costs." Lamarr cut into my reasoning as if the solution were that simple. "You'll have it done at 11:59 p.m., December 31st fuckin' with me."
"Thank you, babe. Seriously, thank you but no." I said and shook my head as a smile crossed my face.
I appreciated his support, but this was something I wanted to do and alone. As much as I spoke about ego I could admit that's all this drive to decline his help was, but I still wasn't quite ready to put something so detailed and special to me all in his hands yet. Lamarr heard me loud and clear though, which is why he grumbled a few words that I'm sure epitomized his frustration with my defiance and gave my leg as squeeze. Regardless how he felt about the situation he let me be though, just as I do for him.
As we sat in silence for a few minutes and simply relaxed, my eyes settled on something Lamarr forgot to mention that he purchased today. Now that my attention was stuck on it I was tempted to sit up on my knees and reach over to grab it from the arm of the couch.
"Is this a mistletoe?" Lamarr's own eyes opened and rolled over toward me where he saw the plant decked in a red bow in my hand. I tossed my leg over his thighs, this time my body melting into his lap instead as I held the mistletoe over our heads. "It is and I think you should kiss me since I just made it that much easier to do so."
Lamarr gazed at me with a smirk slowly curving his lips and reached his hand up to snatch the mistletoe from my grip. He threw it aside and planted his hands on my hips, firmly pressing his fingertips into them as I snaked my arms around his neck and leaned down to capture hips lips in a painfully steady kiss. The motion was far innocent though, our tongues invaded each other's mouths and slowly explored every bit as if this was our first-time kissing. As amazing as this felt, I wanted to taste more than just Lamarr's lips. I had to part ways from them and trail a few pecks down to the soft skin of his neck that oddly turned me on so much.
The scent of his cologne filled my nose as the tip of my tongue slowly circled around and traced every vein it could find. Here and there I'd leave my mark behind with a nibble or suck into his flesh, and each time Lamarr's breathing would pick up and his body would tremble against mine. The last time I softly drew his skin between my lips however coaxed a groan from his mouth, and it seemed ignite heat between our bodies and force all of the blood running through our veins directly to where it needed to be.
"Fuck this shit," Lamarr grumbled as he nearly tore my sweatshirt from my torso to reveal my bare chest the second I sat up.
Without a thought, he curled his tongue around one of my exposed nipples as his hand roamed up the left side of my frame to clutch my breast. He rubbed and kneaded the circumference as his thumb simultaneously flicked the nipple, and what drove me even more insane was the fact he kept the same tempo with his hands and his mouth going all while showing equal attention as he switched off. The action and the regard behind it had the inside of my thighs moist and clit throbbing.
"L-Lamarr..." My voice broke out into a moan as I barely called out his name. I threw my head back and slowly began rocking my pelvis against the rising peak pressing against me, ready to enter. My hands were roaming around his shoulders as I slid them down his arms to grip tightly as he popped my nipple out of his mouth, leaving both hardened in the brisk air. Lamarr's moist lips hung open as his broad eyes locked with mines and his fingers tugged at the rim of leggings.
It was almost if magic took over our bodies the way my bottoms quickly disappeared and his sweats and boxer briefs released his stiff length. The height I was still elevated at as it sprang out was enough for Lamarr to brush his tip against my slit, back and forth and all the way down to the center until his erection was lubricated enough for him align with my core and bury himself deep inside.
"Dammit," I gritted as my hands gripped Lamarr's shoulders tightly and my teeth bit into my bottom lip.
As many of times we had been in this exact same position, my walls would never be completely prepared for his invasion. I needed a second to adjust, to shift my hips and allow Lamarr to scoot forward enough for my legs to ease down to his hips and wrap tightly around his waist. He held me close, but far enough to attach his thumb to my clit and massage it in circles as he pacified me for several long minutes with unhurried strokes. Every bit of me was practically dissolving, fitting to Lamarr like a glove and as if we were made only for each other and especially for numbers like this.
The air remained almost silent, my whimpers and his grunts were increasing and clashing as the momentum intensified. Lamarr's strokes were now meeting the thrashing of my hips as I took more of him. Our bodies jerked with each crash and my walls continued to saturate every inch he drove inside me creating a wet melody to Lamarr's ears. In reaction he cursed under his breath and pounded into me harder, giving me more potent thrusts.
"Shit, Ry." Lamarr groaned as I pulsed around him, almost ready to let the tingling starting in my toes ripple through my body. "Hold it for me, baby girl."
But I just couldn't.
I had to squeeze my eyes and bury my head into Lamarr's neck just to keep some kind of composure. My body was becoming undone from the inside out, weakening in the heat swarming us as my grinds against him came to a halt. That's when that tingle, a powerful orgasm surged throughout every limb and had me yelping out as my walls clamped Lamarr firmly. That didn't stop him from going overtime for his own sake, and as his rag doll I took every harsh thrust and ignored the over sensitivity brooding between my thighs. The feeling was unbearable yet amazing, one I wanted to challenge but even more so give in to.
So I did just the latter. I exhaled deeply just as Lamarr groaned out loudly and released himself deep inside my canal. It elicited a chain reaction of me milking him as I damn near let off a stream over him yet again. Though we were both gradually falling from our high, Lamarr remained burrowed into me, continuously but sluggishly rocking his hips against me as he slithered his now glistening thumb from beneath me. Lamarr hooked it inside my mouth and watched as it vanished.
"That what you really wanted," he mumbled as I held my gaze to his and sucked him dry. I released him then inched forward to latch onto his bottom lip, sucking it roughly until I was completely satisfied.
----------------
[Lamarr]
"I sure hope Ms. Kay is home since you decided to pop up unannounced," Riley snarled as she unbuckled her seatbelt and tipped forward to gaze out the front window. The driveway to my mother's home, that we both examined, was empty and showed no sign of a presence. There were no glares of light sneaking from the cracks of her shades, and the sprinklers she left on during the day were shut completely off.
"Let me tell you now that I will not be spending the night at a hotel, Cole. So you better cut your surprise short and call her."
"Nah, I'm good." I snapped back, killing the engine of our rental car. I could feel Riley's evil eyes burning through the side of my face from the passenger's side as I removed the keys and unlocked the doors. I didn't need to turn my head in her direction to know I needed to acknowledge her frown and immediately. "What?"
"If I didn't love you, I'd smack you in your smart ass mouth. That's what."
"Actually," I dragged out and finally peered over at Riley who had her eyes squinted as she waited for my smart-ass remark. "That's domestic abuse." I corrected.
"That's you needing to watch your mouth." she quipped with a far from intimidating smack against my arm, then proceeded to open her door. While Riley wasn't paying attention, I took the chance to grab my camera and switch it on, just to get a quick shot of this particular part of Charlotte. "FYI, I'm not getting out this car until you're sure she's home. I don't feel like walking up the driveway just to walk right back."
"And yet, as you speak, you've got one foot inside the car and the other almost out as if you're about to do just the opposite." I tittered, going through motions parallel to her own. "Just lying, lazy ass."
"Excuse you, negro. My feet hurt like hell from walking around that entire damn airport that lost my damn luggage for exactly fifty-seven minutes after landing. So yes, I am lazy and trying to stretch them and my legs out." Riley admitted all while I hiked around to the passenger's side and grabbed her hand to help her out. Riley's mini rant, that was now under the study of my lens, however wasn't over though, and I'd let her aggressive ass air it out if it kept her heedless to the fact she was going against her own demand.
"I can't believe people are paid to separate and place luggage on the wrong carousel when there are tags with its corresponding one on it already. What sense does that make?"
"I don't know, baby girl." I muttered and gently closed the door behind her in effort to not break her train of thought. Riley kept complaining about every single thing that pissed her off while at that airport, and she did it as those same sore feet inched closer and closer to the door where I rang the bell. "I think you should write a longwinded letter just like your rant to the city of Charlotte and let them know you weren't impressed with their services."
"You're being sarcastic right now, but it's cool." Riley nodded in acceptance as she snatched her hand from my grip and her arms folded themselves over the other across her chest. "I'll remember this day...and get that camera way from me."
"Girl, you know I love you." I sang as I threw my arm around her shoulder and bowed down to place a kiss on her forehead. "No matter what you do."
Riley scrunched her face up as she swatted me away, "Sure you do, Lenny. Can you just ring the doorbell again? You're not slick."
"But you got out that car though, didn't you?" Riley ignored me as a silence remained and stood as an obvious answer.
In the midst of all the pestering and jokes, I had reached forward just enough to press the bell again and now I could hear a very familiar voice shouting I got it as it neared the front door. There were echoes of old school music, classics that I grew up on, playing in the background. It let me know exactly what was going on behind these concrete walls, and after a few more seconds of waiting patiently, the door swung open and revealed just that. My Aunt Connie was in the city for the holidays and from the expression on her face she was shocked to see us in arms reach - figures.
"Ah, Lamarr!" she greeted excitedly as she stretched her arms wide and threw them around my body for a hug. "My favorite nephew,"
"You better be careful before Zach hear you," I joked as we embraced, my Aunt Connie squeezing me tight as if it had been years since we last saw each other. Eventually she stirred backwards and away from the doorway to welcome us in with her hands covering her mouth in awe.
"Oh my gosh," she exhaled, shaking her head. "It's so good to see you all, and especially this beautiful woman on your arm. You're glowing," she directed just as my camera did toward Riley, who smiled back at her bashfully as she closed the door behind us. "It feels like it's been forever since I've seen you two."
"We saw you in Fayetteville, auntie. That was back in September, it's only been three months."
"And so much has happened since then that you might as well be a whole different man. You're engaged and having a baby," she listed as we followed behind her toward the kitchen where the heart of the music settled. "I wouldn't be shocked if you had more news for me. Enough about you though, how is mommy here doing?"
"Oh, I'm better now that I'm in my second trimester. I can breeze through life for the time being," Riley breathed out as a whiff of steak and potatoes hit our noses. The pleasant scent cut right into her thoughts as they veered off to an entirely different topic. "Mm, we're just in time for dinner, I see. Luckily for you all I am hungry and ready to eat as we speak,"
"Well we're glad you came with an empty stomach," Aunt Connie chuckled as she pushed the marbled frames on her face up. "I'll make sure to scold my nephew for not feeding you enough."
"You know," Riley uttered as she glanced over her shoulder at me, sticking her tongue out then looked back at Aunt Connie. "You should, and excuse my language but put your foot in his ass too."
"Aight, so what we not about to do is make this a gang up on Lamarr segment. I feed her all the time since she can't cook."
"Bite me, Cole."
"I'd love too," I shot back smartly as Riley rolled her eyes and held back a smirk just as we walked into the doorway of the kitchen.
My mom had her back turned, facing the stove where she busied herself with a tray of macaroni that was sprinkled with freshly shredded assortments of cheese. To the side and on the countertop were chopped red and yellow potatoes tossed in her usual garlic, rosemary and oil concoction. The scene reminded me of Sunday evenings in the Ville where I'd come in from being outside all day at the courts, bathe and rush to the dining table with my brother for dinner. The platter alternated depending on her mood, but despite that she never failed us. Just like I knew she hadn't today.
"I know you heard us coming in, miss lady."
"I did and I'm so sorry I didn't greet you sooner, Riley." My mom stressed her name specifically in effort to ignore me as she twisted around and grinned back at us both. Riley closed the distance between them with a few steps as my mom's hands instantly went to frame her stomach. "Look at you two! Just gorgeous," she admired before they cradled each other. "It's so good to see you, sweetie."
"It's good to see you too, Ms. Kay. Thank you for inviting me into your home for an entire week. I'll try not to chase you out of your comfort,"
"Oh honey, no problem. I was looking forward to your company this good ol' evening anyways." My mom shared as she drew away from Riley and gave her wink. Though the gesture was small and could easily go unnoticed, I peeped it and her choice of words. "So how is my grandb—"
"You told her we were coming, didn't you?" I interrupted my mom before she could finish her sentence and watched as Riley shrugged in response. "You did! You see this, baby girl? Your mama be lying," I said into the camera as I placed it on the kitchen island.
"Oh Lamarr," My mom chuckled and slapped my arm with the towel in her grip like I was a kid again. "You're terrible."
"What? She do though!"
"Don't go feeding that mess to my child. And technically I didn't say yes or no. That was a maybe I did, maybe I didn't." Riley clarified. "Now hush and give Ms. Kay some love so us grown folks can finish talking,"
"Y'all both sneaky," I said under my breath and reached out to cape my arms around my mom just as she did the same. It was so good be back in her presence, smell her sweet scent and hear her warm voice. No matter how old I get, the feeling of security and genuine love, that motherly love, was something I yearned for and needed.
As her eyes remained shut and her head rested against my chest, letting me know she missed me just as much, I leaned down to peck my mom's forehead. "You good?"
"I'm great, my baby boy. Just glad to see you again." she gave me one last squeeze before we released each other. "This year might just be my favorite Christmas yet, or next year. I'll have a grandchild and hopefully a daughter-in-law too."
"Ry is already your daughter-in-law, ma."
"I know that, but it'll be official; with a ring, the wedding, family and all." she specified as she nodded at Riley's left hand that rested on the island top, and smiled. "I guess you're stuck with each other forever now. Bless your heart, Riley."
"I know, right! How unfortunate," Riley blew out. "I don't plan on leaving this Earth too soon, but even when I do he'll still be stuck with me. My spirit will haunt him."
"Aight, again. Why are we doggin' me out while I'm standing right here listening?"
"Trust, no one is worried about you." Aunt Connie claimed as all three of them shared a laugh, and my mom went on to finish preparing dinner.
I sat down across from Riley and picked up the camera to angle toward her and my aunt who within seconds became engrossed in a deep conversation about only God knows what. The topic was sure to be caught on film along with all the other details of my mom's kitchen, her simplistic cooking style and even the chants of Simply Beautiful playing in the background. Though I was detached from it I still managed to watch, or should I say admire how all three of these important women in my life easily interacted with each other. I imagined this entire week they'd grow closer together, and the experience would feel more family oriented.
In the past, things never felt complete and maybe that's because something was always happening that put a dent in the so-called family we had. It was either my father leaving, my step pops and his bullshit or a ton of other things I needed more than both my hands to count on. Something was always missing, and now I realize it was just the right people. Back then, not everyone we allowed in our space and home was genuine nor cared about anyone outside of themselves. However, each person present in this moment, my brother and a few other immediate members that Riley would soon meet were all we ever needed; including our amazing friends. To finally see that image of love and family drawn out in front of my eyes even if it wasn't as conventional as the that I grew up watching on a TV felt fuckin' amazing. Like this song playing, it was simply beautiful.
"Dinner is almost ready," My mom said, breaking into my thoughts. It had me shaking my head and shutting my camera off before I rose up from my seat. "You guys can go and get freshened up while Connie and I get the table together,"
"I can help too, Ms. Kay." Riley offered as she proceeded to stand and reach for the plates my mom gathered from the cupboard over the sink. In return she swatted Riley's hand away and placed them far away from her grasp.
"No. You're my guest and I will not have you working, sweetie." My mom asserted. "Lamarr, go and grab her luggage so she can go upstairs and get comfortable. Connie..."
"I'll show you the guest room you two will be in," My aunt followed up with as Riley smiled and threw her hands up to surrender. She'd learn just like I did over the course of my life that Kay Cole would not argue with anyone, she won before the argument even started. You just had to give in off bat.
As they left out of the kitchen with me trailing behind, my mom suddenly called me back in. I stopped in my tracks and trickled back a few feet, peaking my head inside the doorway with a raised my brow.
"Wassup, ma?"
"I'm happy for you, that's all." The beam on her face was bright and contagious and one I could stare at all day. It was almost as if her seeing me content with life made her content in her own. "I'm also proud of you and the man you've become. You're gonna be quite alright."
-------------------
"I'm so exhausted," Riley slurred out as she crawled into bed beside me, dressed in my classic Bulldogs basketball jersey from high school.
After dinner my mom thought it was a good idea to swing down memory lane and pull out a box of my belongings from my Terry Sandford years. With every item she found she had a story, and that left Riley with tons of questions that needed answers. After almost three hours of flashbacks they finally decided to call it a night, and for Riley that included draping herself to her knees in, believe it or not, something I still took pride in.
"You should be tired," I grumbled as Riley curled up next to me, throwing her leg over my waist. "You were running your mouth all night and ate like six plates of food."
"I did not," Riley swore as she poked her bottom lip out. "It was two plates of dinner for your information, and a big bowl of banana split."
"You mean a big bowl of banana split and half of mine. Altogether that might as well be six plates." I teased. "Now you gone keep me up all night, groaning in pain from a stomach ache."
"When have I ever kept you from sleeping with a stomach ache, Lamarr?" Riley stared up at me as if she was clueless to the answer. I only shook my head and fought against breaking down five nights ago and the six hour timeline of her intruding my space with her tossing and turning that ended with me rubbing her stomach at 3 a.m.. There were things these days that she craved, but could not and should not eat. She always went against the instinct though and ended up as she was at this moment.
"That's what I thought," Riley hissed as I slid my hand up her thigh to caress her soft skin. "So tell me, what do you and your family usually do for the holidays?"
"It depends. When I was younger everyone on my mom's side would gather at my grandmother's house, cook a huge dinner and play games, catch up and then sit around and lounge." I unveiled as she listened intently, her eyes locked to my lips. "After she died, we all kind of ventured off and did our own thing. My mom thought it would be cool for her and my brother and I to decorate the house, build snowmen, do some caroling around the crib, and other shit like ice skating for the twelve days leading up to Christmas. Each day was one or the other. Now, I was kind of hoping we could do the same thing just with you in addition. I mean, if you'd like."
"I'd love too," Riley eased out with a smile. "You should carry the tradition on every year and we can add our own little flavor to it; the modern-day Coleman-Cole edition. My family was pretty much the same so this could work out."
"Of course the Huxtables did corny shit like that," Riley rolled her eyes at my slick joke as I chuckled. "You know your ma and pops were the epitome of black love, don't front."
"Eh, they were alright."
"More than alright," I said, stating nothing but a fact. "To be real with you, we're kind of like the younger, slightly dysfunctional, alternative version of them taking over mid and late 2000s. Don't you think?"
"I-...nope." Riley denied me as she snuggled her face into my neck, smothering her snickering. "That sounds ratchet as hell, just no. You couldn't call us a more young, soulful yet eccentric version taking over the mid and late 2000s? We just had to be straight dysfunctional which is code for a mess."
"I mean, if you think about it we were kind of a whirlwind, baby girl."
"I don't think I like your tone, sir." she said sarcastically, making us both break out into a laugh. Riley's however faded into a whimper, but what made it so weird was the fact that she didn't sound as if she was in pain. From the slightly contorted yet peaceful mien of her face that had her eyes closed, I honestly couldn't make out what was going on. That alone frightened me and she knew that.
"I'm fine, Lamarr."
"You sure about that?"
"Yes," she insisted as she glanced up at me. "I tend to get this weird sensation in my gut sometimes. It feels like a swarm of butterflies are fighting against each other for room in there or even like someone is tickling me from the inside. I read some of those pamphlets Dr. Jones gave me the other week and it's called quickening. The rush I just felt though was harsher, way more intense."
"What does that mean, Ry?" My hand had stopped brushing her thigh and instead griped it tightly out of fear. I couldn't help it though. What Riley had just shared, my lack of understanding and natural anxiety had me afraid something was wrong. As she always did though, Riley had it all vanishing before my eyes in midair with just a stroke of her hand against my chest.
"It's okay, it's just the baby moving. It's just letting me know that it's healthy in there."
That was when it hit me that everything was perfectly fine. That was a sign that our baby was developing as it should be and that as every week passed by, we were getting closer and closer to seeing them up close and personal. Knowing that, I exhaled and was finally able to accept and allow this moment to unfold. I could let it sink in anf become a vivid memory.
"You meant to say she is letting you know that she is healthy," I slipped out as my hand slowly slid up Riley's thigh and directly up to her stomach. One way or another I knew we'd be ending up in this position, now just for a totally different reason. This one was pure fascination.
Riley yawned as her eyelashes fluttered and her lids slowly eased shut. My hand was working its magic, doing the trick of slowly driving her into a sedation.
"You just insist on calling it a her,"
"Well it's better than you calling her an it, like she's an alien or something."
"That's because it is an alien." Riley mumbled into my neck before she kissed my skin softly. "You won't be able to feel it move yet."
"So? We can still bond," I argued lowly. "Now hush and just let my daughter and I bond."