07:
*Warning: This chapter contains an explicit scene*
What am I doing here? What am I doing sitting in Elaine's office with Ian's hand capturing mine? What am I doing sitting here allowing this to happen again? What the hell is wrong with me?
“I just...I just lost it and I'm sorry.” his heavy sigh sweeps across the tense silent room. I notice a small tear slide down my cheek so I lift my hand to wipe it. My right eye is still swollen and my lip still has crusted blood on it. It hurts to touch. I feel a reassuring squeeze on my hand that makes me want to pull away more. I try to pull out of his grasp but he holds it tighter.
“I'm sorry, babe.”
With my eyes trained on my denim jeans, I shake my head disapprovingly. I can't forgive him for this. Not this time, at least. The memories of that day still rattle my bones.
“Mommy!” I see Danny's tiny body running towards the car. His hair is disheveled and so are his clothes. He had a busy day.
“Hey munchkin! How was school?” I ask once Ian straps him in.
“It was awesomest! We drawed Tanksgiving Turkeys!” he smiles widely, revealing tiny white teeth.
Ian laughs while I turn to face him. His tiny fingers grip his bag while his legs swing freely.
“Ohh, lemme see!” I smile back just as wide when I see his lit up emerald eyes.
He starts digging through his backpack while I wait.
“Hello Mrs. Hunt, can I speak to you for a minute?”
Turning to the window, I see a middle aged woman with graying hair standing outside the car.
Once I step out the car I'm greeted by a warm smile and wrinkled face. The beaming teacher seems pleasant as she shakes my hand.
“I'm Mrs. Nichols. Danny's pre school teacher.”
“Oh, hi.” I smile nervously.
“Hi,” she half smiles then says, “I just wanted to address the note your son wrote last week.”
She pulls out something from her satchel. It's a piece of paper.
“I asked him and everyone else in class to write a letter to a family member they missed and explain why they missed that person or persons,” she frowns then says,
“Well, this is what he wrote.”
With my hand on the paper, I make a quick glance back to see Ian leaning against the car. He has no idea what Mrs. Nichols is saying and I pray he doesn't walk over here to find out.
“So, if there is anything going on-”
“What could be going on?” Ian asks abruptly. The heat resonating off his body bleeds into mine. I swallow nervously, trying to mask my sudden fear.
“I asked him why'd he write this...letter and he told me because his mommy needed help.”
Staring at the three bold words, my heart drops.
-Dear Grandma,
Mommy needs help.
He even left our old address on the letter.
“He wanted me to mail it to his grandmother who already lives with him. I'm just trying to figure out what kind of help she needs,” her hands lock together while she stands straighter. Her golden brown eyes hold Ian's unshakable stare.
I urge myself to speak but Ian beats me to it. He chuckles nervously before grabbing my hand. It's a very firm grip so I know not to pull away.
“Mrs. Nichols, the only thing his mommy needs help with is telling the truth.”
When I helped him write it I didn't expect him to actually write it, if that makes sense. I expected him to say we loved and missed her or something similar. When I helped him with this he asked me who I missed and why. Well I told him I missed my mom because she can give me the help I need. I didn't expect him to literally write it out. I guess that's what happens when he overhears his daddy and I arguing over the letters he hid from me earlier.
“Mrs. Hunt are you alright?”
Opening my eyes, I notice her brown irises frowning at me with concern. She reaches out to touch my shaking hand but I pocket it quickly.
“I'm fine,” I swallow the heavy lump in my throat, trying to relieve my anxiety. If I keep focusing on Ian's harsh grasp then I'm going to have a panic attack.
We left shortly after Ian and Mrs. Nichols dissolved the issue. He brushed it off as Danny's wild imagination while I listened silently and fearfully. I knew what the note consisted of and Ian did too. And although I had no intentions of Danny telling his teacher, I'm kind of glad he did it. I'm not angry at him because he didn't realize the severity of Ian Hunt's wrath. He was just trying to help.
Just like I have every right to want to write my parents and tell them to help me. I have every right to want to go back home. To keep living my life with the love of my life, Jared Rogers. But now that we're here, it's going to be a million times harder to leave. I should have thought this through properly.
“In the famous words of JFK: Change is the law of life. And those who look only to the past or present are certain to miss the future.”
Elaine's poised words spill from her fraudulent tongue, knocking me out of my reverie. She makes me sick to my stomach when she tries to justify Ian's destructive behavior.
“I'm sure JFK didn't have a bruise around his neck when he said that,” I spit venomously.
“Of course he didn't,” she smirks at Ian then looks back at me. “He'd never let that happen,” her glance is a bit taunting. This isn't funny.
“Are you saying what I think you're saying?” It's not okay for Ian to hit me. It will never be okay.
“No, I'm only saying that change is possible if you let go of the past. You two can turn this entire thing around and become the perfect family we want you to be,” She leans forward, clasping her hand together before an eerie smile appears on her red lips.
“You want us to be?”
“Well, not just Martin and I but Ian also.” She tilts her head while pointing towards Ian.
He's leaning back in his chair. His hand is still clutching mine, kissing it softly.
“I'll give it a shot...I'll do it for Ava and Danny,” his brows pull together as if he's thinking hard.
“No, this isn't something that can change overnight, Elaine.” I try to pull out of his hold but he squeezes tighter. Wincing from the small pinch, I continue squirming uncomfortably.
“I don't know if you noticed, but I am a hell of lot better than I was before,” his voice is firm and authoritative. As if he demands I believe him.
“I just lost my temper, and for that I am sorry,” he apologizes in a hushed tone.
I want to tell him how much of a bullshit liar he is but I can't do that. That will only cause more arguing. So instead of being aggressively outspoken, I stop to think. I allow his words to settle in. All the times we argued over the stupidest things; whether it was the dishes being in the sink for too long, or not greeting him when he came home from work- he has never really hit me. Just pinned me against a wall or counter. Before that, I'd be lucky to be walking the next day. I remember every single day spent with Ian over the course of those three torturous months. And I remember an angrier, aggressive, possessive Ian. Not the calm, collected, undisturbed Ian sitting next to me now.
But what about three days ago, Ava? What about the bruise he gave you after finding out about Danny's letter?
As soon as we pull into the garage, the car is put into park and Ian steps out. The entire drive home was quiet. Meaning some shit is about to go down.
“I wants to eat now,” Danny's high voice awakens me. Ian has him in his arms before I can even exit the car.
“We'll eat soon. But for now go to the kitchen and have grandma grab you a snack.”
Danny nods fervently before running off.
“No, she can't be near him.” I open my door to stop Ian but a small gasp escapes when I feel my body being slammed into the cold, hard pavement. I hit the ground face first, busting my lip in the process.
“Correct me if I'm wrong, but you wanted him to spend time with his grandma, right?”
I feel my hair being pulled back and in that instant, I realize what he's going to do. I open my mouth to protest but a painful slap sends my palms to the ground. With my head down and my chest heaving, I try to crawl away.
“Uh, uh, uh. Come back here,” he uses his body to pin me down.
My chest tightens and my throat constricts as I find it harder to breathe. With a strong arm around my waist he hoists us up.
“We need to fix this,”
He scoots us to the wall, hugging me against his chest.
“I need to help you, Ava. Just let me help you,”
I shiver when I feel a cool breeze caress my neck. His lips graze the outline of my jaw while I try to steady my breathing.
“Okay,” I agree quickly.
“From now on I'll help him with school assignments. We'll do it together so there's no plotting behind my back. Is that clear?”
“Understood,” I nod once to let him know I get it. I don't want anymore problems.
He lifts me up so I'm facing him. I have to blink a few times to ease the stiffness of my bruised eye. I can feel the fresh blood drip from my lip but I don't wipe it. I wait for him to do what he has done time and time again.
“I love you too much to let you go again,”
He raises my chin before leaning in. Closing my eyes, I allow his soft lips touch my throbbing ones. He kisses me; even sucking some blood off my lips. His hands instinctively wrap around my waist while I place mine- hesitantly- on his shoulders.
We stay like this for a few seconds until I feel his nails dig into my side. I release a small whimper before hearing,
“I don't like hurting you but if you ever make me look like the fucking bad guy again I'll show you why you shouldn't,” eyes of jade glare down at me, making my heart race. The evil aura pours from his soul, polluting mine as well. My dull brown, teary eyes never leave his and before I know it my throat is being squeezed.
“Answer me, Ava.”
Coughing and wheezing are the only sounds I manage to make. My hands grasp his while my eyes plead for him to release his strong hold. The emotion in his eyes; once full of anger and wrath is now replaced with remorse.
“Shit babe, I'm sorry. I didn't- I wasn't thinking,” he starts rambling while I rub my neck. After a few gasps for air I am finally able to breathe properly.
“Why don't you join him for his therapy sessions?”
Elaine's suggestion forces my head to raise. My brows furrow while I chew on my bottom lip, trying to prevent back talk.
“I mean it's only fair, Ava. He has done so much for you and Danny, and what do you give him in return? A reason to hit-”
“Elaine, stop talking.” Ian's rude tone makes me flinch. “She agreed to go so you can leave now.”
“I did?” I look at him with a mix of confusion and anger. I didn't agree to anything.
“You will agree to go,” he pauses then whispers, “So Elaine can shut up.”
#
Thanksgiving Day
“You put sugar in the mashed potatoes because you thought it was salt?” he shakes his head at me.
“You know I'm a terrible cook,” I laugh when he gives me a playful nudge.
Everyone starts laughing, giving the dining room a lighter feel. Most of Ian's family members are here. His twin cousins, Mandy and Melanie showed up. Mandy came with her fiance Joel. Yeah, you read correctly. They're engaged and I could have sworn the only way they'd get hitched would be in a dream. But hey, I guess I was wrong. Joel kept his distance from Ian while Ian himself, acted like Joel didn't even exist.
Anyway, bitter ass Mel had to tag along. Maybe because she follows Mandy everywhere or maybe because she loves her cousin, Ian so much. Either way, she's here encouraging Danny to play with his food. Elaine and Martin couldn't keep their hands off each other. Pecking on the cheek, whispering in the ear, caressing arms. By their sixth glass of wine- yes sixth because I counted- they were full on making out. It was quite disgusting. Like watching two fish lock lips. Sloppy, wet, and not very attractive.
As the even came to a close, things became more pleasant between Ian and his father. They managed to sit through dinner without even fighting. And he too, shared the same, beaming smile as me.
Once dinner ended and our guests left, Elaine and Martin decided to head to bed. Senator Hunt has been here for a couple of weeks due to Thanksgiving. He's on vacation.
“Did you like that chef I hired to teach you?” Ian asks suddenly, he must have tucked Danny in already.
“Yeah, he's really good at his job.”
It's been three weeks since our little discussion in Elaine's office and Ian has made some very noticeable changes. He helps out around the house more; even allowing me to sleep in some days. He takes us out every Saturday night and even participates in Danny's school functions. I was surprised when he enrolled him in little league baseball. Anyway, along with that, he hasn't had one violent episode and because of that, it's so much easier to talk to him. I know it's still too early for assumptions but from what I've witnessed he has changed for the better.
“Here, let me help.” he grabs the plates from my hands and walks over to the sink.
“You can't clean all of this in just one night,”
He later explained his reasoning for not hiring maids, nannies, butlers, and other services most wealthy people have. His exact words were, “Growing up with those services made me lazy. It made me dependent on the help that weren't going to be there my whole life. So, I decided I never wanted them doing normal, everyday things for me. Plus, it sucked not knowing how to do my laundry in college.”
I laughed at him for that and he joined in. But soon after the laughter faded I began to realize the true meaning of his words. This guy who has so much and has lived a life of luxury and privilege is humble enough to realize that he needs to do things on his own. That alone made me see another side of Ian Hunt. A more humble side. And in that moment, I realized there must be a somewhat decent guy behind that mask of crazy.
The kitchen was cleaned in a few hours and we were both exhausted. We headed upstairs to shower. He allowed me to take mine first before taking his. After we cleaned ourselves and dressed in our pajamas, I tied my hair back before heading to the door.
"Where are you going? I already tucked him in."
He's standing in the doorway, blocking my path with the cockiest smile. Damnit, I don't have time for games.
"I have to stay with him to make sure he doesn't have nightmares." My eyes pierce his while I stand my ground. I know it's a terrible excuse to get out of sex but the longer I can keep myself from betraying Jared, the better.
"He's three Ava, if he's having a bad dream he'll come to our room."
And before I can push past him my hand is gripped tightly. Swallowing the lump forming in my throat, I gather the courage to speak.
"I'm going to check on Danny." I pull forward, trying to pull out of his grip but my efforts are in vain.
He chuckles when I stumble back into him, not able to break from his grasp.
"Still as stubborn as hell, I see." His arms are now snaked around me while I breathe heavily. They go under my shirt to cup my breasts.
"Mmm." He moans into my neck while I try to think of what to do. Do I push him off? Or, do I just go with it? What's my next move?
The wind is knocked out of me when I'm lifted up and brought to the king sized bed. Its' scarlet silk sheets enamor me in comfort. Trapping me in tranquilty. If not for Ian eyeing me like a piece a meat, I'd feel very comfortable laying on these sheets. They feel so good.
"My Ava, I've missed you," He bends down to capture my lips with his.
The feeling startles me before my eyes slowly close. The deeper we kiss the more my body reacts. His tongue flicks around, making a point to dominate while I wrap my arms around his nape. I feel his rough hands go up and down my sides until my pajama shorts are pulled off.
I feel a tight grip on my hips before he brings them up to be wrapped around his waist. My bare chest is pressed to his shirt, making me excited for what's to come. Oh shit. Excited? What's wrong with me?
"I've been waiting so long to feel you again," he whispers while I continue panting heavily. I watch him swiftly remove his tee shirt, sending my wandering eyes to his toned chest. My mouth drops at his firmness. His body is more than delectable. His abs are the first I notice so I trail my fingertips along them, imagining dirty thoughts. I want to devour his sexy body right now.
"You..you're so-."
The longer I gawk at him the more lost I become. His lips are slightly parted while his eyes shine with lust. My heart starts fluttering again when he flips his blonde hair. It's a bit longer now because it lingers over his gorgeous green eyes.
"Breathtaking? Yeah, you are too." He chuckles at me before giving a satisfied smirk.
What the hell am I doing? Why am I so awestruck over this man? The same man who kidnapped me, raped me, and murdered my best friends. Why am I feeling this way? Was this always in me?
No. I shouldn't be giving in to him. My fingers slide off his chest while I try to sit up. I need to shake myself out of these thoughts. These dirty, desirable thoughts of him. I need to think about Jared.
"You okay?" He's still straddling me, preventing me from moving my legs.
"I'm...I'm really tired, actually." I use my elbows to prop myself up. A dizziness overtakes me for a second, forcing me to close my eyes.
"Lay back down,” he demands sternly. "Now."
My eyes open at his tone. It's solemn yet enticing. Part of me wants to punch him while the other part urges to obey.
"Ava..." He warns. This time he's pinching my nipple and making me wince.
"So-sorry..." Noticing the iniquity in his green eyes, I gulp before slowly laying down. My palms start to sweat when I feel his fingers near my entrance.
I can't let this happen again. I won't.
"Wait!"
"Wait for what?" He questions teasingly. "This?"
In an instant my legs are spread and my eyes begin to tear. My heart sinks when I see the sadistic smirk line his attractive features.
My chest constricts while I try to breathe properly. I know what he's thinking and I know what's to come. With my eyes closed, and my hands pressed to his chest I brace myself. I brace for the excruciating pain of him, I brace for the blood, and I brace for his anger.
The entire time I'm waiting for him to push into me, I can't help but think he's teasing me. Like it's a game to him. A game he is in control of. I fight back tears as I lay helplessy underneath him. This is it. He's going to rape me again. What do I do? How do I get out of this?
A sudden pulsating force rams into me, causing my throat to erupt. A loud groan parts from me while I try to squirm away.
"Relax your muscles and follow my lead,” he instructs gently.
My quaking body relaxes and soon, the discomforting ache is replaced with... ecstasy? I can't describe it but I know it feels good. Too good.
He goes down on me again, repeating his motions while I continue following his lead. I'm learning and he's patiently teaching me.
"Knew...you'd...feel good." He grunts out while I arch my back. I surprise myself when I allow him to go deeper.
At first it took everything I had in me to resist him. It took all of my being to fight this. But the louder our panting became, the more I couldn't hold it in anymore. I needed to release this. I needed to feel more of him.
With his breathing just as heavy as mine, he strokes my cheek before pecking my forehead. Lifting my head, I go in for a kiss. It's mystifying and breath taking. My hands hold onto his head while we kiss. I hear a small moan from him before I'm lifted up and moved. He walks us to the wall. I know because I can feel my back pressed against it. With my legs still wrapped around him, I wait for him to position himself. I feel his tip again, making me gasp.
With my mouth now open he takes advantage.
My toes curl when he grips my rear, pushing me further . My nails dig into his back while I moan out. This time we're faster and more balanced. The vibration of my core startles me. The way he makes me feel startles me but I push those thoughts away. All that matters is how amazing he feels inside of me. I'm able to climax and soon, I'm resting my head in the crook of his neck.
We're hot, sweaty, panting and filled with lust. Both of our bodies heave from the previous workout.
With silence casting over us, he carries me to bed. I can walk but I'm too tired to protest so I let him carry me. He lays me down with the gentlest touch while I hum in content. My eyes are now closed, being lulled to sleep by his fingertips gliding along my bare arms.
"Ava look at me,"
This time the way he says it isn't threatening or filled with malice. He wants to tell me something so I turn my head to face him.
"You deserve the world, Mrs. Hunt. You know I can give you that and so much more,"
My heart skips a beat when he reveals shining, white teeth. His words, along with his smoldering eyes give me chills.
"You know that, right?"
His malachite eyes roam mine while my throat becomes dry. He's dissecting me while my thoughts race. What am I doing? Was this part of my plan? Can I really lead him on?
I jump when I feel his electric touch on my chin.
"And you also know that I'll always get what I want. That includes when I want it, and how I want it."
He licks his lips emphasizing the word 'how'. I know Ian Hunt, and I know that tonight was a sacrifice for him. His motto is pain before pleasure, and my pain is his pleasure. But tonight was different. Something tells me that this will be the first and last time I'll receive enjoyment from it.
I groan when he squeezes my chin painfully, forcing me to nod my head in agreement.
"Glad you understand babe, now let's sleep."
I lay down rigidly, too afraid to move. And just like he made me feel safe earlier, he's making me feel frightened now. His hands are tightly wrapped around me in a protective way. I can't even move to turn over. I notice his chin rests atop my head while the rest of his bare body presses into mine. What did I just do? My troubled thoughts suffocate me as we lay tangled in the sheets. As I lay tangled in the arms of danger.
**--**
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