Luke
Today is the day.
I begin to turn down the radio as I enter the school parking lot. My subconscious is telling me to park in my old spot near the football field, that's where I had to park during my senior year of school. But now, things are different. I'm not nervous, well who am I kidding? I couldn't be more nervous. Everything I have worked for the last few years is finally coming to fruition. This is my dream... sort of. This is my realistic dream that can pay the bills, for now. I look over at my passenger seat and see my briefcase. My grandmother gifted that briefcase to me when I began college. She always believed in me, and she would be proud of me for making it this far. I let out a shaky sigh, grab the briefcase and leave my car.
I take my time walking into the building. Everything looks exactly the same, except there are a few yellow flowers planted by the front door. Also, it appears that the building has been painted an even more boring shade of beige. Wonderful.
I take out my keycard to enter the front doors, and I suddenly flashback to the first time I walked through these doors as a student. I had just turned thirteen years old. I was such a young boy to be entering into high school. I was terrified because I was a year younger than all the other freshmen. I skipped a grade in elementary school because I was intelligent. My age never seemed to bother me until I began high school. However, it did give me the advantage of graduating early and starting college earlier than others. And here we are, a full ten years later. I'm standing here as a teacher just as scared as I was when I began my freshman year.
One would think that I would be overflowing with happiness at this opportunity to work at my old high school. The truth is, I hated attending Canyon View High School. The teachers were beyond boring and they had no compassion for any of their students. They would always assign way too much homework and never cared enough to teach the lesson material properly. I learned how to look past the teachers, but I couldn't look past the bullying. Yes, yes. I was one of the millions of teenagers bullied in high school. It wasn't the cliché Hollywood bullying where I'm shoved into lockers, beaten to a pulp in the middle of the hallway, or have my head forced into a toilet. It was emotional bullying. People hating me for how I looked, picking on my voice cracks when puberty screwed me over and then making fun of my growth spurt where I seemed to grow two feet overnight. I think I could have handled the physical abuse better because being picked on for things you cannot change wrecks your confidence and mental health. I am thankful that I did have a few good friends and a family that supported me during this dark period. They helped me see the light and gave me hope to move forward. Their support inspired me to become a teacher. I want to be an advocate for my students, unlike my past teachers. I want to give students hope and a good education.
I make my way through the empty halls in search of the teachers' workroom. It takes me a minute as the layout of the building has changed, but I finally found it. I head straight for the coffee maker as I forget my freshly brewed coffee at home. As I walk to the counter I pass three teachers, none of which I recognize. I try to politely say hello, but they only stare at me in return.
"He's a new teacher." I hear one of them loudly whisper. She is a younger lady, definitely not as young as me. She is messily eating a muffin that looks drier than her skin. Sorry, but I don't think she's ever heard of moisturizer.
"Oh my, he looks so young." The oldest woman exclaims in a not so quiet whisper. She's probably one of those teachers that think part of the requirements to teach is being over the age of 30. You know how the saying goes, the older the wiser.
"Well, I heard that Sally had him when he was in ninth grade." The third teacher says as she fixes the buttons on her shirt. "She said he was a real geek."
I can't help but roll my eyes. If my new co-workers are going to continue to talk about me behind my back, I might as well turn in my resignation now. My coffee is now done, so I quickly grab the cup and leave the room without saying goodbye to my rude co-workers.
I walk down the wall until I reach my classroom. I shut the door behind myself and take a deep breath. The school day is about to start in ten minutes. Hopefully, everything goes smoothly, not that there is much to do on the first day of school. I have been preparing my lesson plans for over a month now. I think everything should go perfectly and according to plan.
I set down my briefcase on my large desk to take out the notebooks and supplies I've packed. I place everything neatly on my desk and wipe off the dust that seemed to have collected over the weekend. After I spent all last week cleaning and setting up my classroom, I'm not surprised that there is already dust settling in after two days. What else should I expect from a 30-year-old building?
I take a quick sip of my piping hot coffee and sit down in my comfy leather chair. I check my watch. Only eight minutes left.
I grab my planner and open it to the current week. My eyes start moving quickly as I skim over the plans for this week. Each day has a long list of different activities and reminders from both my personal life and for my new job, but mostly for my job. I must say, I am obsessed with being organized, and even more so with planning every minute of my life. I take every Saturday and write out the plans for the upcoming week, and I must say it's one of the highlights of my weekend. Planning never gets old.
In my peripheral vision, I see a small sticky note on my desktop computer. I lean over to read it. Ah, it's my login to view my class rolls and attendance tracker. I quickly log in and begin scanning over the roll for my first period class. I quickly whisper the names under my breath. I print out the roll so that I can have a hard copy. Then I give the roll one more look over and land on one person's name. Cassi Bell. Hm, strange. The only other person I know with the last name Bell is Matthew Bell. And you guessed it - he was the leader of the friend group who bullied me. Is it possible that they are related?
My curiosity gets the best of me. I pull up the school's database and type in her name. Her name pops up with her records, grades, attendance, and other information including her immediate family. My suspicions were correct, Cassi is Matthew's younger sister. Hope to God she is nowhere near as obnoxious as him. I open her records to see if they'll give me any indication of the type of student that she is. This girl was held back. There's no information as to when or why she was held back. Now I'm even more curious.
Without trying to snoop, although I already am, I check Cassi's age. Nineteen. A little too old to be a student, I think to myself. Being nineteen does not mean that you are too old to be a student, as for myself, I was considered to be too young to be a student. I did enter my senior year at the ripe age of seventeen.
I close out of all my tabs, then open a slide show that I created for the first day of school. Its title, not too creative, is Welcome to English 12. I chuckled to myself as I look at the hilarious meme I pasted onto the first slide. I know that this should win the students over. They love memes these days! At least I hope so... but there is no time to overthink.
I pull up his sleeve to check my watch. Three minutes until the first day. Butterflies begin to erupt in my stomach. I couldn't be more prepared for today, however, with each moment that passes I become more anxious. I don't want the students to assume that I will be a cringey teacher for being so young and attempting to be hip or funny. At the same time, I don't want to appear too strict and boring. I would like to be the best teacher that I can be and share my knowledge with my students.
Two minutes. I look out at my classroom again. The empty desks are going to be full, and for the first time in forever everyone's attention will be on me.
One minute. I can already hear a couple of voices coming from the hallway. It must be the students that are excited about school. Or the students have been dreading the first day and they are complaining to their friends.
Brrrring. The first bell goes off. I stand up from my chair and walk to open the door. I stand there to greet the students as they walk in. Two girls that were waiting in the hall walk into the classroom. I give them a smile and say hello. The girls glance at me before turning to each other. Both girls blush and try not to stutter as they say hello back to me. That was weird, almost as if they thought I was attractive? I shake my head as they walk away, I'm sure they think that I am a student as well. But can I blame them? I'm only twenty three.
As more students enter into the classroom, some acknowledge me but most walk past me without saying anything. I'm almost certain that none of them are aware that I am their teacher. They'll soon learn.
The second bell finally rings, indicating that school is now in session.
"Good morning," I say with a nervous smile while walking to the front of the classroom. Everyone starts to slowly stop talking as I pick up a dry erase marker. "My name is Mr. Hemmings." My shaking hands write my name on the board.
"You're our teacher?" One girl asks him.
"Indeed. I guess I will take roll call then we will start our first lesson." I pick up the paper copy of my roll.
"Sarah Anderson."
"Here." A girl says. She is sitting at the back of the classroom with another girl, probably her best friend. I mark Sarah's name off before calling out the second name. I call out two more names for coming upon Cassi Bell's. Here we go. I say a silent prayer, hoping that she is nothing like her older brother.
"Cassi Bell," I say, with my eyes glued to the paper. No one responds. "Cassi Bell," I say again. I glance up to find that other students are looking quickly around the room.
"Is Cassi here?" I ask my class. (Wow, this is my class). I hear a few "I don't know"s and see shrugs from students.
"Okay." I sigh. This is already off to a great start. "Julia Bra-"
"I'm here!" A girl burst through the closed door yelling out. She stops in her tracks and takes in a deep breath.
"And you are?" I inquire.
"Cassi. Um, I'm Cassi Bell." She says. Her bag begins sliding down her shoulder, but she quickly pulls it back up. "And you are?" Olivia sassily asks me the same question.
"Mr. Hemmings, your teacher," I reply looking straight into Cassi's eyes. Strangely, she looks nothing like her older brother. She has very delicate features as opposed to Matthew's very average and dare I say, slightly (very) ugly features. Compared to Matthew she is quite beautiful if I might say. I would have never guessed that they were related.
"You're Mr. Hemmings?" Olivia asks in disbelief. Trust me, sweetie, I'm shocked myself.
"Yes, now take a seat," I say as I point to an empty seat with my blue pen. Olivia walks to her seat without saying any other word. Maybe she won't be as bad I thought.
I continue taking roll, finishing with Taylor Walker's name. I have 25 students in my first period class. They all seem nice, granted it is only the first day of school. In a month, I might take that statement back.
I pick up the stack of class syllabuses I printed out and begin to hand one out to each student.
"Okay, so as everyone knows I am Mr. Hemmings. You've probably noticed I do have an accent, and you guessed it, I am Australian. Uh, I just graduated from college in May, and I am here to teach you everything I can about English. It's my goal to set you up for success in college and in the real world. It may take me a while to learn everyone's names, but I will try as hard as I can. So, before we start does anyone have any questions about this class or any other topics?" I ask.
As I finish my question, a girl's hand shoots into the air. I'm pretty sure that the girl's name is Anna.
"Anna?" I say in a questioning tone. The girl nods her head before speaking.
"I was wondering why we were required to read Romeo and Juliet. I mean, we've already read that in like ninth grade." Anna babbled.
"I understand that everyone has already read Romeo and Juliet, but did you learn much from it besides two young lovers killing themselves? I want to take the story and look at the deeper meanings, as there are many. But don't worry, that's not the only topic we will discuss this semester," I explain. "Anything else?" I glance around the room.
Cassi raises her hand with perfectly manicured fingers.
"Yes?"
"I actually have a personal question for you," Cassi says with a smug smile.
"And what is it?" I inquire while letting out a small sigh. I already have a feeling about what her question will be - something about my age. I knew that someone was going to ask me about my age. Better sooner than later. I walk closer to Cassi until I am standing right in front of her desk.
"Aren't you a little too young to be a teacher?" She inquired. I bend down until my eyes are level with hers. "Aren't you a little too old to be a student?" I ask the girl in return.
No one says anything as all eyes are on Cassi and me. I have a feeling that no one knows about her being held back.
Cassi certainly seemed shocked. I don't think she was expecting that I would already know about her little secret. I'm sure most teachers don't find out right away, let alone on the first day of school. Cassi stares into eyes as I stare right back into her deep brown eyes.
Cassi says nothing, she only lets out a deep sigh. I stand up straight and glance down at Cassi. I need to make sure she will be a good student, not a hassle. And I need to do it today before it's too late.
"And I want to speak to you after class," I say before walking back to my desk.
Updated 3.21.20