DISCLAIMER: Everything here does not belong to me, only the plot does. All characters here belong to the amazing Hideyasu Takahashi. All the pictures belong to their respective artists but I mostly get the pictures from Google Images.
Hi guys!
I got the inspiration from this from an animatic by a mess called Maci on YouTube. It's an animatic on an AU made by ayaptre (YT account). It's really goon and I recommend you check it out! It's a HermitCraft Fanfic centered around Grian!
Enough about me telling you about a completely different fandom! Onto the fic!
⚠️ ¡Suicide Warning! ⚠️
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I've been so good, I've been helpful and friendly
I've been so good, why am I feeling empty?
I've been so good, I've been so good this year
This was a new all-time low, he told himself. He hasn't felt this bad since his parents. Was he doing enough? Was he not worth enough? People always told him every action matters but does it really?
I've been so good, but it's still getting harder
I've been so good, where the hell is the karma?
I've been so good, I've been so good this year
Life was so hard. They say what goes around comes around right? He's been doing good things this year, right? He must have done something worthwhile right?
Why, are you asking me why?
My days and nights are filled with disappointment
Fine, oh no, everything's fine
I'm not sure why I booked today's appointment
"Hey, J0(3r, are you okay?", Spade asked him, noticing the dark circles under his eyes. "Huh?", replied J0(3r. He rubbed his eyes before saying, "What are you talking about Spade? I'm perfectly fine!".
I've been so good, I've been helpful and friendly
I've been so good, why am I feeling empty?
I've been so good, I've been so good this year
"Okay... if you're sure...", trailed off Spade on an unsure tone as he walked away.
'Wait!', is what he wanted to cry out. 'No, I'm not okay! I need help!'. He desperately wanted to cry out but his throat tightened and he could only watch as Spade left.
I've been so good, but it's still getting harder
I've been so good, where the hell is the karma?
I've been so good, I've been so good this year
This was tearing him apart. He couldn't do this for much longer. He just wanted to rest, oh God, he just wanted to rest.
What, am I normal or not?
Am I crazier than other patients?
Right, I've done everything right
So where's the karma doc, I've lost my patience
"Is it just me, or is J0(3r more tired than usual?", he heard them from the other room. What were they doing? Talking about him behind his back, or is that genuine concern?
'Cause I've been so good, I've been working my ass off
I've been so good, still, I'm lonely and stressed out
I've been so good, I've been so good this year
"Oh no...", whispered J0(3r as he ran towards his room. Once he got in, he slammed the door shut, locking it, and then slid down the wall. "What do I do? What do I do? What do I do?!".
He just needed someone to tell him what to do!
And I've been so good, but it's still getting harder
I've been so good, where the hell is the karma?
I've been so good, I've been so good this year
He was sorry! He was really sorry! He wanted to redeem himself from whatever he had done!
Ah-ah-ah-ah
"Hey, J0(3r! You can talk to us, you know that right?", said Queen
Ah-ah-ah-ah
"Yeah. I know.", he hid a painful smile.
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah
"Just making sure you know!", said Queen as she walked away.
Ah-ah-ah-ah
"Actually, Queen I-", he hesitated.
'What are you doing?! She doesn't need to be burdened by our problems. She's probably having a harder time than you! Stop complaining and suck it up!'
Ah-ah-ah-ah
"Nevermind."
It doesn't matter, he shouldn't burden them. He walked into the hall, towards his room.
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah
It was nighttime now, nobody in the ship. Joker entered the bathroom and got a box from a compartment in the wall. He pulled out a box and pulled out a gun loaded with a single bullet.
I've been so good this year
Hachi wasn't here tonight. He was staying with Phoenix and Hosshi for the week.
I've been so good this year
"Okay, time to do it.", he brought out his phone and called Phoenix.
Time, I know we're out of time
But what if sad thoughts come and I can't stop it
Bye, I don't wanna say bye
If only I could keep you in my pocket
"Hello?", called Phoenix who was previously sleeping. "Hey, Phoenix.", he called out. "Sorry to call you so late but I just wanted to say bye."
"Joker, what do you mean?"
To give me some diagnosis of why I'm so hollow
Please give me instructions, I promise I'll follow
I tripped on my ankle and fractured my elbow
But doesn't that mean that the tour's gonna sell though?
"I wanted to say goodbye before I go away. I just feel so tired. I wish I could rest but I can't.", he said with so much exhaustion and fatigue that Phoenix could feel it.
"Joker, what are you getting at?"
I try to explain the good faith that's been wasted
But after an hour it sounds like complaining
"I want to rest so bad... and I'm about to. I wish there was more time. I just don't think I can do this anymore. I wanted to explain to you and the others but I realized I was just complaining. So, I'm going to rest."
Wait don't go away, can I lie here forever?
"Wait, Joker, where are you?", Phoenix said through the phone with a tone of realization. "Don't do it, it's not worth it. I can help you get better."
You say that I'm better, why don't I feel better?
"Heh.", he chuckled humorlessly. "I'm sorry, Phoenix. I really am, but, what if I don't ever feel better? I'm just a waste of space in this world."
The universe works in mysterious ways
But I'm starting to think it ain't working for me
"I was born in the wrong world, wrong place, wrong time. I can't last in this game we call life..."
"Joker, no, listen to me, don't do it.", yelled Phoenix through the phone, his voice getting desperate.
"I'm sorry, Phoenix."
"Don't you dare hang up, I swear to God! JOKER-"
Doctor, should I be good?
Joker put the phone down as he held the gun in his hands. He aimed it at his head as he could faintly hear the flapping of wings approaching him.
"I'm sorry."
Should I be good this year?
BANG.
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Whoa. That took a while to make!
I'm sorry it's so sad but that's what my brain came up with!! I'll try to make it happier next time!!!
Buh-byyyyyeeee