Trixie's POV
Milk: hey where r u?
I rolled my eyes as I sat on the beach looking at Katya. "Are you okay?" Katya turned to look at me. She was standing with her feet in the water. Katya wanted to come here after spending the day at the school, painting. We didn't really talk much but I didn't mind that really. I didn't really know what to say anyway. "What's up?"
"Milk texted me."
"Hmm, everything okay?"
"Yeah, he was just asking where I was."
"Told him?"
"No." Katya hummed as she kneeled down and picked something up.
"Trixie?"
"Yeah?"
"Can I ask you something?"
"Sure."
"If the world ended today, what would you want to do?"
"Huh?"
"What would you do, if it was the end of the world?"
"What kind of question is that?"
"A question that I want to know the answer to."
"I don't know Katya. I barely know what I want to do now and I have my whole life ahead of me. How would I be able to know if I knew I was gonna die? I have never known what I've wanted."
"You're such a sad sack."
"Shut up."
"I mean you are. You're still young Pixie, you can be happy you know?"
"Yeah, yeah. Well, what about you? What would you do?"
"Just what I'm doing now."
"Pick up shells?"
"Well, no you ass." Katya smiled at me as she walked closer to me. "I would spend it with you. Talking, laughing, even in silence."
"Bullshit."
"Just because you don't believe something or know how to handle it, doesn't mean it's bullshit Ms. Mattel."
"Whatever."
"Why do you sass me?"
"Because I can." Katya stood in front of me and looked down at me.
"Can you?"
"Last time I checked, I could do what I wanted." Katya grinned and got on top of me, pinning me down.
"Really?" I felt my mouth go dry as I looked up at Katya. Her blonde hair was tickling the sides of my face but I could only focus on her eyes. The memoirs flooded in when I let myself focus on her touch. The slight tightness that I felt around my wrists sent my heart on a ride. Katya smiled and tighten her grip a little.
"Katya."
"Yes?"
"Kiss me."
"What?"
"Kiss me Katya."
"Are you sure?" I nodded my head slowly. Katya leaned down and looked in my eyes before letting her lips press against mine. I closed my eyes and let myself sink into the familiar softness of Katya's kiss. I quickly began to remember why this was my favorite feeling. Katya pulled away and I missed the feel of her, just as I did while she was away. "Are you okay?" I touched my lip and took a deep breathe.
"I just wanted to see..I wanted to understand."
"See what? Understand what?"
"Why I missed you so much. Why I still miss you."
"I'm here."
"Are you? Maybe I just got so sad that I cried myself to sleep and this is all a dream." Katya put her hand on my cheek and smiled. She kissed me again, this time she seemed like she had a purpose. A goal she was trying to reach. Katya pulled me into her lap and put her hands under my shirt on my sides. She ran her hands up and down my sides softly. I could feel myself being sucked into Katya's world. I wanted to be. I wanted to be apart of it fully. Katya pulled away again, her hands still under my shirt.
"Do I still feel like a dream?"
"Not any kind of dream that I've had before."
"God.."
"What?"
"I forgot how beautiful you are in the moonlight."
"Oh, shut up."
"Pixie?"
"Hm?"
"Are you happy?" I looked at Katya. Her ocean eyes making me drown.
"I am now right now. I am with you, that is my problem."
"Is it a problem?"
"Yes."
"Why?"
"Because I'm not yours. I never have been actually. But my heart doesn't seem to grasp that."
"Trixie, I'm always going to be here."
"You don't know that. I could make you mad and you could leave again."
"You'd leave with me."
"You're funny."
"I'm not making a joke. If I leave again, you are getting on that plane with me." Katya held my hand and kissed it.
"Are we doing this again?"
"I don't know, are we? You aren't single anymore."
"Mmhm."
"Pix, do you love him?"
"Milk?"
"Yes."
"I don't think so."
"Then why are you with him?"
"He asked? I didn't want to be alone? I missed you? There are a number of reasons that could be given. But the main one has to be that I felt so empty and didn't care. He doesn't love me, so I don't love him. We are barely friends so I just..we're wasting time I think."
"Why waste it when you could actually be happy?"
"Because Katya, I don't want to love you like that anymore."
"Are you sure about that?"
"Maybe?"
"Well Pixie stick, if that is what you want then you can try."
"What do you think I've been doing?"
"Well, you're not doing a very good job missy. You told me to kiss you."
"Shut up." I crossed my arms as Katya laughed.
"Listen, I told I'd be your friend. If you don't want to love me anymore then I understand. You have a life that you are trying to live and emotions can be confusing. Letting go of the past can be the first step to finding happiness in the future."
"How do you do it?"
"Do what?"
"Don't you hate me Katya?
"Wait, why would I?"
"I'm the reason you left. Why aren't you mad at me? Why are you acting like nothing happen? You are acting like we didn't stop talking..like we didn't see each other."
"Actually you're wrong."
"How?"
"Because Trixie, I missed you so much that honestly I don't care. I missed you so much I want to just talk to you and hear about every single thing. I would want to hear what you ate for breakfast as long as you're talking to me."
"You're crazy."
"Maybe, but that craziness has nothing to do with how I feel." Katya smiled as she kissed my cheek.
Katya brought me home after two more hours at the beach. She confused me. I played her words over and over again in my head. I missed you so much that honestly I don't care. Was it really that easy for her? I finished drying my hair as I walked in my room. I picked my phone up and saw that Milk had called and texted me a few times. I swiped his messages away and smiled a little at a text Katya sent.
Katya:I still hate to see you leave my car. I hope you had a nice time because I sure did. If you need me Pix, remember I'm here. Goodnight💕