Warning: Not that many of y'all should care, since the Sansgirl fandom is full of sin, but.. Swearing in this chapter, so if you're an innocent smol bean, avert your eyes.
"Uh.. Not much to talk about is there, heh.. You probably already know why I.. Uh.. Freaked, heh.." Sans shrinks slightly as he speaks, leaning into my arm. I rub his back, making circles on his hoodie.
"Yeah.. Must be weird, seeing your ex fall in love with you again." I try to console.
"Can we change the topic? To.. Uh.. Something a little less this?" Sans asks.
"Sure.. Speaking of which, I'm sorry I kissed you. I didn't really have any other options, but sorry if you didn't like it." I offer.
"I'm not." I hear him mumble. "U-Uh.. Nah, it's cool. Tibia honest, you're a really good kisser, heh. I didn't really mind." Sans stammers out. I think back to what I heard him mumble.. He wasn't sorry I kissed him? A warm feeling spreads through my body.
"That's humerus. We only kissed for, like, a second. How could you even tell?" I try to laugh it off.
"Yeah.. Uh.." Sans looks at the ground, scratching the back of his skull. "Heh. I couldn't, really. I just assume that you'd be great at it." His eye sockets widen. "N-Not as a creepy way or anything, just as.. Uh.." He looks away. I chuckle slightly at his flustered form.
"It's cool. You seem like a pretty good kisser, too, I guess." I try to complement. I look away, realizing what I just said.
"Uh.. That's.." Sans blushes more. I twiddle with my thumbs, studying the ground. "(Y/N), can I kiss you?" He asks suddenly.
"Wh-?" I start to ask. Before I can finish my sentence, Sans' skull is on my lips. It feels oddly like flesh. A blue tongue prods at my lip, asking for entrance. I let it in, the blue ectoplasm exploring my mouth. Sans' eyes are closed, and he looks like he's enjoying himself. I relax into his arms, which have tangled themselves around my waist. I begin to kiss back, our tongues gently bumping eachother.
I've never kissed someone like this.. Slow, passionate. It was always lustful, quick, or during hookups. Never with someone I actually liked. Never with Sans.
I focus back on the makeout session, Sans' lips still pressing against mine. His blue tongue bumps mine again. I try not to move, not wanting to ruin the experience. He lifts his lips off of mine for a second, only to slam them back on at full speed. I inhale sharply through my nose, letting out a small squeak. I start to move my tongue around his, the sensation feeling weird. It's not hot, or lustful.. It's passionate and slow. He presses his tongue against mine once more, slowly moving off of my mouth. A string of blue saliva connect us. Sans' eyes widen. He looks at me with shame, standing up.
"(Y/N), I-I'm so fucking sorry. I didn't mean ta do that. It just sorta happened.. I'm not a perv, I'm so sorry.. T-That was just.. Gah.." Sans averts his gaze, backing away. I miss the feeling, as creepy as that may sound. He looks at my stunned expression, sighing.
"I.. Uh.." I let the situation sink in, blushing deeply.
"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to.. It was just the emotions, ya know?" Sans rambles, his eye sockets wide with panic. "Oh, no no no no.. You probably think I'm a perv, now.. I just ruined everything. I'm so sorry.. I'll go now. Sorry, sorry, SO FUCKING SORRY!" Sans shouts, kicking the wall, his eye flames up, as if he's about to teleport. I shake off my emotions, grabbing his arm. The blue fades.
"It's fine. I'm not mad at you. I understand- It was just the emotions." Even if I want it to be more.. I hug him from the back, burying my face into his jacket.
"I-I.. That's the thing! I-It wasn't just the fucking emotions!" Sans seems like he's going to calm down, only to flare back up. His eye begins to tear, blue, translucent drops falling from his eye socket. He shakes me off, teleporting to who knows where. I studder back onto the bed, stunned.
He probably didn't like me. He only kissed me because I remind him of Frisk in some way. I'm not good enough for him.. His comedic personality, his deep and serious side, his affection.. His broken soul, his hurt, his pain.. He's not perfect, but close enough to it for me. But I'll never be close enough for him.
I sigh, heaving myself off the bed, slightly reluctant to go back home. When I eventually do teleport, it's to my cottage. I don't feel like facing my friends right now. My phone buzzes twice. I ignore it, flinging it onto the couch. I run to my room, slightly hurt. I swing myself onto the bed, instantly missing the warmth of Sans' room. I try to sleep, tossing and turning. Eventually, I succeed, drifting into dreamland..
"(Y/N)! Wake up!" Gaster shakes me up. I sit up, remembering about the void. "Oh, thank goodness. I let you sleep without training for a night, but I was highly concerned that you would be unable to return to the void afterwards."
"Gaster, can you train me? I need to take my mind off of something." I request. I slightly wonder why he would think that I would be left unable to return to the void, but I brush it off.
"Certainly. I must teach you how to increase your stamina. It's something I never got to teach Sans, which has proven to be quite an ignorant mistake of mine." Gaster hisses regretfully. "Here. Open to page 79." Gaster hands me a large textbook, the symbols on it slightly different from the last textbook I studied from in the void. I flip to the requested page, looking over it.
"So.. This'll help me go for longer without getting tired?" I probe.
"Basically. It'll also assist you in taking more hits. At an average, both you and Sans have very low defence, making you vulnerable to attacks. You also have lowered max health, due to little amounts of HoPe." Gaster explains.
"What does hope have to do with anything?" I ask.
"A monster's soul is generally very sensitive. Since you are a hybrid of sorts, your soul also follows these guidelines. If a monster is depressed, their soul also becomes depressed. It's more vulnerable to cracks, and is generally weaker. Sans is not in a good mental state, and it appears that you aren't, either. This technique will teach you to make your soul derive less off of your feelings, and more off of the faith you have, which it appears that you have quite a bit of. If you lose faith, however, your HoPe can still decrease. But I'm hoping that we can avoid that." Gaster explains. I nod, not pressing further.
The textbook tells me to imagine all of my sadness letting go of my soul, and to focus on the faith I have for my friends. How determined I am at their success. How patient they are. How kind they are to me. How brave they are, and how honest and whole they are. How they always persevere. It tells me to focus on that. There are strings from those emotions. Where the sadness used to hold my soul, now they hold it instead.
I focus on these feeling, connecting the strings to my soul. I summon it, trying to focus on its bright pink colour. It's (F/C) aura begins to glow brighter, a mixture of colours dancing across its surface. Red, light blue, green, orange, a darker blue, and purple. A sudden warmth rushes through me. Gaster looks at my soul in amazement, staring at its flickering colours.
"Amazing.. Now, try to fight me. I'm incorporeal, so no matter how much you beat me up, I'll be alright. Do your worst." Gaster smiles, shutting his eyes. I fling him into the wall, his body making a thud. My blasters take less time to charge, and the bones are faster and lighter. I teleport quickly around the room, flinging bones at him quickly. I pin his body to the wall, blasting him. The power grows, and it feels good to let it out. I smile, breathing out. I then look at Gaster's wounded figure. I help him up quickly.
"You good?" I ask worriedly. His features concentrate for a second, all of his wounds disappearing.
"I'm alright. I'm sending you back, now. That took longer than I thought it would. It'll be morning, soon. See you when I find something else to teach you." Before I can wave goodbye, a drowning sensation engulfs me. I fall asleep somehow, dreaming of Sans..
A/N: SO!! YOU AND SANS BOTH KISSED AND MADE OUT!! How was the romance bit though, for real? Like, am I good at that, or..? And what should I change? Also, do you think the story's moving too fast, or do you want me to get (Y/N) and Sans together quicker or slower? By the way, I'm like super tired so apologies if the end bit is a bit meh. I'm trying to get as many chapters out as possible, soooo.... ALSO!!
Thanks so much for 1.5K! I won't get all mushy and stuff- I'll save that for 5K. But seriously, I'm glad that people are reading my books and liking them. Okay, I just spelled liking wrong, so imma go sleep nao. Byeeee. )Cathpraise een proograss(