SIX YEARS AGO
"I can't believe the professor, I'm so unsatisfied with my grade."
"You got an A- Anaya, I'm sure you'll live."
I threw Yara a dumbfounded expression as we strolled through the immense halls of Quivelon College.
"That's asking me to accept defeat which I won't do."
Yara rolled her eyes before muttering, "Here we go again. . ."
"I swear the professor has something against me. She's the only teacher who always marks my accounting exams that way." I continued to kvetch much to Yara's dismay.
"Naya ever since you've been in Honours, you've been obsessing over your grades," Yara argued in a matter-of-fact tone as she briefly waved back at some colleagues who were waving at us — well, her to be exact since my social skills were debatable.
One of the many downsides of befriending an extrovert.
"You and I should attend Friday's party, it'll do you some good." Her suggestion was enough to summon a blank look on my face.
I'd lost count of her proposing the same thing, knowing the exact reaction I'd have.
"You've finally admitted you can't live without my parties." the familiar voice from behind was enough to freeze Yara in her tracks.
Upon swiveling around, the sight of two of Quivelon's most certified heartthrobs reared into view.
And there went the thunderous thump of my heartbeat upon seeing his face in the company of his best friend.
Stalon and Ludovic briefly exchanged the same smug expressions on their faces before anchoring their alert gaze onto us once they came to an abrupt halt in front of us.
Quick Anaya. . . think of an excuse to escape.
"Get over yourself," Yara retorted as she addressed Stalon in boredom, "I was referring to someone else. You're not the only one who throws parties on campus."
Stalon snickered patronizingly as he briefly jabbed Ludovic's arm with his elbow who equally began to chuckle at their exchange. "Vic you're hearing this? She can't lie for the life of her."
Yara threw her arms in the air. "I don't even know why I bother with you. Anaya, please tell this chipmunk the truth."
How could I properly function with the intense look Ludovic was giving me that had the effect to turn my brain into mush?
It didn't help the school uniform he wore that day particularly made the colour of his eyes stand out.
It's like he knew the effect he had on me because he continued his gentle chuckles as he bit his bottom lip teasingly.
Avoiding his gaze at all costs, I pretended to be fascinated by the floor, inwardly thankful for my long locks curtaining most of my facial expression.
"Earth to Anaya, are you even listening to me?"
Her voice was enough to snap me out of my thoughts as I threw her an apologetic expression.
Yara threw me a puzzled look as she folded her arms. "What's gotten into you?"
Before I could respond, Stalon interceded amusedly. "It's called the Delmore effect."
And to emphasize his point, he posed his elbow on Ludovic's shoulder as they both began to stare at me teasingly putting me on the spot. "Anaya has fallen victim to my bro's charm."
That was enough to snap me out of it.
"Please the only person who's fallen victim to his charm is him since he's obsessed with himself," I responded blankly as I gripped the textbook in my arms.
"And she's back," Ludovic stated flatly as he still entrapped me in his piercing gaze whereas I was trying to come up with an excuse to leave.
Stalon and Yara snickered in response.
"Well, I'll catch you guys later." I didn't wait to view their reaction before withdrawing.
As I headed towards the opposite direction, I tuned out their background voices.
"What? Naya, we agreed to eat lunch before class."
"You're such a nerd, don't tell me you're going to the library?"
"You can run from me Anaya, but you can't hide."
My heart began to pound uncontrollably as I continued to march at a rapid pace towards the staircase.
When I initially attended the academy, I would often get lost in this labyrinth of a building and always struggled to find the library.
But there I was ten minutes later at my destination whereas it used to take me twenty minutes to find the room.
By the time I arrived in front of the tallest bookshelves, I cursed upon realizing that the one textbook I needed to reserve for my economics class was located at the highest shelf.
Since there was no staff in sight, I outstretched my hand upwards as I began to hop to reach the bloody textbook.
Gosh, I probably looked like a retarded bunny.
All my efforts were useless but I was not about to give up.
That last textbook was mine.
The sudden sight of a solid arm reach up for the same book heaved into view thereby making me freeze on the spot.
All my senses came to life as my pulse began to accelerate.
It couldn't be who I thought it was.
All my fears were confirmed once I rotated only to come face to face with the one person who had the power to destabilize me.
Ludovic.
There was no space between us since he was standing right in front of me with his chest almost pressed against mine.
After he achieved his task of grabbing the textbook, he smirked as he playfully handed it to me.
I felt trapped in his presence as his arm was still outstretched above my head with my back pressed against the bookshelf.
"I knew I'd find you here," he said in a dangerously low tone that drove me crazy as he towered my frame.
This time I had nowhere to run.
After seizing the textbook from his hand, I tried to avoid his gaze again.
"You've avoided me for weeks," he stated the obvious in an unreadable tone as his face was dangerously close to mine, "When are you gonna give me an answer?"
It's like the intensity of the situation caused some of my walls to deteriorate.
"It can't happen Ludovic," I responded coldly, inwardly convincing myself I was doing the right thing.
My heart and mind were at war.
"Look me in the eyes," he ordered and despite his voice turning cold, I couldn't help but wonder if there was a tinge of desperation in his tone.
When I shook my head, he persisted boldly, "Anaya, look at me dammit."
I swang my restless gaze towards his only to be met by his intense ocean eyes which always took my breath away.
His eyes were desperately searching mine, my defensive walls crashing more and more by the second.
"I'm going insane," he revealed frustratedly as he ruffled his wavy locks, "why do you always push me away?"
At that moment I cracked.
"We come from two different worlds," I argued as I hoped my statement was enough to convince him it couldn't happen, "everyone will be against it and school is my priority right now. I can't afford the drama that will arise once the whole school finds out."
"Since when do you give a fuck about what those morons think?" He interjected as his brows furrowed in frustration. "This only concerns you, me and no else."
I continued to shake my head in antagonization. "I meant what I said before when I told you I could only give you my friendship in this —"
"Bullshit," Ludovic interceded as he refused to comply, "I tried being friends but it doesn't fuckin work. How can we just be friends when you're all I think about every damn day?"
My heart somersaulted hearing his words.
He was so close to digging deeper than he'd ever done and I couldn't allow it to happen.
When I failed to say a word, he took it upon himself to gently connect his forehead with mine, triggering the uncontrollable speed of my heartbeat.
"I know you feel it too," he almost whispered sending my emotions on fritz, "No matter how hard you try to fight it, your body language never lies."
My blood rushed through my veins with every word that escaped his lips.
Despite how he first asked me out weeks ago, I still couldn't believe it which drove me to live in denial as I kept refuting what he claimed to feel for me.
I mean let's face it, guys like him barely went for girls like me because his dating history showed he always dated experienced girls from his social class.
It just didn't make any sense.
"I'm not like those other girls that you've dated," I asserted desperately once my gaze met his again before I disrupted our facial contact, "I'm inexperienced and I have a boring personality. . .so I don't see how this can work."
A glint of hopefulness appeared in his eyes.
"Then go on one date with me to prove me wrong." He concluded as his sharp gaze didn't waver from mine one second.
It seemed like our staring contest lasted hours because neither of us was willing to break the silence.
First to break eye contact, I threw a glance at my phone screen to check the time.
Crap, I was going to be late for class.
I took my backpack from the ground before quietly taking my retreat.
"You still haven't given me an answer." his words were enough to pause me in my tracks once my back was facing him.
Maybe I was tired of running, tired of denying what this could be, tired of lying to myself, tired of building up those giant walls.
Before I knew what possessed me to do the following action, I found myself turning around by the time I was a good distance away from him.
His cold gaze was still fixated on me as he appeared on the verge of giving up.
I quickly began to type a message on my phone before sending it to him in one go.
Confused, he retrieved his phone from the pocket of his jacket before assessing the message attentively.
It's not until his mouth curved into one of the widest grins that I've ever seen, that I realized what I had just done.
There was no turning back.
Once his gaze locked mine again, I officially lost myself in his passionate stare because I no longer attempted to move as I felt shyer than I'd ever been.
The victorious smile never left his face as he said,
"I'll pick you up at eight on Friday night then."
༄ ༄ ༄
"Your eyes. . ."
"What about them?"
"What are they hiding?"
Neither of us dares to speak in the following seconds as we're measuring each other's gaze in such intensity.
The tension is fervent, tantalizing, excruciating.
Him manhandling me against the wall causes all the memories of college to come in a flash without warning.
It always drove me crazy when he did that and I could never deny the small part of me that always craved it.
And I'm damned for feeling the same way now.
My eyebrows furrow in confusion once his question begins to register in my mind.
Why would he ask me such a question when he knows the hell I've been through since I explained everything in the letter I sent him a year ago?
The one-letter in which his vicious response made me cry for days.
"What the hell do you want from me Ludovic?" I snap as I forcefully press my palms against his solid chest to push him away with all the strength in me, "Like you don't know all the shit I've been through. Your response letter pretty much showed me how you freakin feel."
Despite my attempts to hurl him away, he doesn't even move an inch.
His unreadable expression instantly gets replaced by a cold one mixed with pure lividness as the flames in his eyes reappear.
We continue to breathe hard as both of us want to break each other but paradoxically, none of us are willing to destroy our proximity.
"What the hell are you talking about?" he growls in frustration as he presses his hands against the wall thereby trapping my frame between his arms, "what fuckin letter are you referring to exactly because it doesn't ring a bell."
My anger begins to boil uncontrollably as I begin to shut down while holding his intense gaze.
"Get the hell out of my office." I order in a dangerously low tone as I stare him in the eyes in pure hostility.
He suddenly pounds his fist against the wall which slightly causes me to quiver but I quickly recover my expression with a blank one.
"I'm going insane, why do I ever put up with this?" he shares in frustration almost as if he's having an internal conflict.
Our breathing pace quickens as silence reigns for the next seconds.
A sudden vindictive sneer transforms his facial features, "Seeing me with your best friend that night can only justify how irrational you're being. It bothered you didn't it?"
I snicker in disbelief as I stare at him like he's grown a pair of two heads.
The audacity.
"I'm being irrational because of you two?" I reiterate mockingly as I run my fingers through my hair.
My reaction doesn't deter him one bit as he continues to assess me patronizingly.
Dear Lord, give me patience.
"I don't give a shit about what she and you have," I yell as I strike him on the chest another time, "And you have some nerve to insinuate that I'm irrational when you're the one cornering me late at night in my office. So who's the irrational one here Ludovic?"
My hits are suspended as soon as my hands begin to tire and undergo pain from striking him so hard.
How can someone have such freaking solid abs? It makes no sense.
He finally drops his hands as my final throw causes him to temporarily back off as he seems lost in thought.
I take a few steps away from him before my back faces him.
Sulking in a deep breath to regularize my tense breathing, I say, "I don't ever want to see your face again. Just get the hell out of my sight."
Ludovic doesn't seem to quit because what he does next is so unpredictable.
He suddenly yanks me from behind before my back ends up pressed against his solid chest causing my heart to jump out of my ribcage.
His breathing instantly causes my eyelids to close as I do not attempt to pull away.
He gently snakes his strong arm around my waist as we begin to breathe at the same intense pace.
"I'll break down your walls one by one and sneak into the gates of your icy heart before crushing it into tiny pieces." He murmurs mercilessly as his lips lightly brush my ear, the contact eliciting an indescribable sensation through every inch of my body.
The proximity is maddening and despite my unwillingness to submit, he knows he's got the upper hand as a sardonic chuckle escapes him.
He tightens his grip around my waist from behind, reducing my options of escaping his entrapment.
His fingers gently tuck my loose strands behind my ear before he foreshadows, "I'll make you regret ever leaving me and once you come crawling back to me, it'll be too late."
It takes me longer than I would've hoped to react to his words.
Nevertheless, I twist my body to face him once again as we're standing so unbearably close to each other with his arm still encircling my waist.
Tilting my head upwards to meet his challenging gaze, I press my palm on his torso as my lips curve into a sneer.
"I will never crawl back to you but rather hop onto the next chapter of my life after dismissing you and your bullshit revenge," I whisper coldly as he tightens his jaw while staring at my lips.
"Read my lips carefully," I tell him softly, "you never affected me and you never will."
His blue pools finally land on mine as he quirks a challenging brow, "Are you sure about that?"
By this time, his face dangerously comes close to mine.
My mind suddenly goes blank as I become crippled on the spot.
A smirk curves Ludovic's lips as they're only separated from mine by less than two inches.
When I fail to respond, his eyes gleam as though he's just won the most important part of the game.
"I guess we should test your theory to see if it's true," he whispers causing my whole body to scream with different kinds of emotions all at once.
Before he can brush his lips against mine, a sudden knock on the door is enough to propel us back to reality.
"Step away from the boss right now," the commanding voice of the room instantly causes us to pull away from each other as we anchor our gazes towards the source in full alert.
The sight of four built security guards rear into view as they begin to invade my office.
It suddenly occurs to me that my earlier call to the security department is what caused their invasion.
"Sir, we're gonna have to ask you to leave this building effective immediately." One of the guards asserts in intimidation as he and his colleagues begin to march towards Ludovic.
The latter chuckles sardonically as he states pompously, "Do you guys know who I am? I'd think twice of provoking me if you wanna keep your jobs—"
Fuming, I maneuver my way in their direction before inserting myself between the guards and Ludovic's figure.
"Just stop talking." I interrupt him impatiently once I come to an abrupt halt in front of him. Ludovic looks utterly pissed but it doesn't phase me one bit.
"It's okay boys," I reassure the four huge men once I pivot to address them, "I made the emergency call in the heat of the moment but everything is fine. He'll walk himself out."
Other Varos employees outside the room try to glimpse through the door of my office to assess the commotion.
"You sure?" one of them insists as his hand is still hovering his firearm secured within the side pocket of his uniform.
I nod my head.
With his forehead still scrunched, the guard presses his walkie-talkie close to his mouth, "Varos office to security, we have a code blue at members 4. No assistance required. "
"Roger that." the voice on the radio of the device can be heard before the security officer redirects his gaze towards mine.
"We'll still wait by the door until he leaves for security measures."
"That is just bullshit," Ludovic roars in anger but the guards disregard his outburst as they collectively exit the room.
The timing of their exit coincides with Vanna's sudden intrusion in the room.
Her expression is just terror-stricken as she freezes on the spot upon assessing my vehement glare.
"I'm so sorry," she apologizes desperately once she's standing next to one guard who still hasn't left the room, "I went for a quick washroom break and I couldn't intercept Mr. Delmore's intrusion. Please, you have to believe me."
Blankly, I fold my arms across my chest before affirming, "Vanna you're fired."
A crestfallen expression behalfs her face as her mouth widens in utter shock.
She shakes her head in denial as she tries to come up with a word to say but fails.
"Vanna you're hired." Ludovic's statement is enough to shift my lethal glare towards him.
The same vindictive expression he wore earlier remerges on his features.
I'm about to lose it.
"I take that back," I assert before redirecting my gaze towards my soon to be PA, "Vanna you're rehired."
"That's too damn bad because Vanna works for me now." he snarls but I refuse to let him have the upper hand.
"Over my dead body."
Vanna seems like a scared mouse as she keeps tilting her head left and right while assessing our dispute alarmingly.
Silence reigns for a while before she chooses to speak.
"I'm gonna pretend we never had this conversation and assume that I'm still working for Varos," Vanna babbles as she takes quick backward steps, "see you tomorrow mam."
Before I can talk, she immediately disappears from sight.
She's safe for now.
Once I meet Ludovic's cunning gaze, I clench my fists, "Get out of my office or the guards will use force."
We measure each other's gaze ardently before he adjusts his cufflinks while stating, "This isn't over."
As he begins to take his retreat, the security guard nods his head curtly towards me before they both exit the room simultaneously.
I pose my palm against my erratic heartbeat upon theorizing what could have happened had we not gotten interrupted.
Get a bloody grip Anaya, where the heck is your self-control?
Before I can berate myself further, the sudden message alert on my phone captivates my attention.
Once I reach the phone on the desk to view my phone screen, my eyes widen in shock upon registering the message :
From Detective Landford
8 : 30 PM
I found the surveillance footage you're looking for. We're one step closer to finding the murderer. I'll come to your office first thing tomorrow afternoon since I'm not in Seattle.
A mixture of anxiety and excitement surge within upon reading the good news I've been longing for all these months.
"Soon Lolita," I mutter to myself, "Soon I'll avenge your death. I promise."
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I've missed you guys so much. Thank you all for continuing to support my story, it means the world to me. Since I'm currently on spring break, I wanted to write a chapter for you guys and hope I didn't disappoint. I hope to update before this week ends since my spring break lasts one week.
Any theories on the mysterious letter Anaya keeps referring to?
Who loves the intensity between Ludovic and Anaya?
Also shoutout to my readers who mostly come from India, the U.S., Philippines, the U.K., Nigeria and much more. You guys are the best.