Bom-bom made a splash at dinner, speaking to the cook in French, the captain in Russian and Aludel in English. All thought it was a distinct improvement, and Hyacinth found herself awash in compliments and anxiety. She bolted her food and tried to make a graceful exit.
Unfortunately, Mortis and Galena cornered her by the dessert table and asked the Abomination if they had any new homicidal tendencies; Bom-bom replied first in Cantonese and then in Hindi.
"This is what you get for playing around with squishy biological brains," Galena said.
"Now dear," Mortis said, "Lady Hyacinth is still inexperienced. I'm sure she'll manage a simple brain transfer eventually. Why, I remember my first creature couldn't speak and only maimed my minions."
Galena shook her head slowly. "That kind of sloppy science might fly at King's College, but I expected better of a Royal University graduate. Lady Delphinium will be so ashamed to hear of this."
Hyacinth said, "She doesn't have to find out. Really."
"Of course she does. I'm getting back in touch with my dear college classmate; I need to tell her all the details of her daughter's failure."
~~~
"It's not that bad," Aludel called through the cabin door. It had been three days, and Hyacinth had only ventured out to use the head. Dirty dishes from the lunch Bom-bom had brought her were piled in the middle of her floor.
"You don't understand," Hyacinth said into her mattress.
"What did you say? I can't understand you."
"Exactly," Hyacinth said, this time to the door. "You decided on a specialty. You graduated first class. You even have beautiful feathers! You don't know what it's like to be a disappointment to your parents."
"That's what you think."
"Obviously that's what I think, that's why I just said it."
"Well you're wrong!"
Hyacinth opened the door. "Really?"
"Yes, really."
"How could you be a disappointment to your parents?"
"I'm not going to tell you in the corridor," Aludel said and pushed her way into Hyacinth's cabin.
"Well?"
Aludel preened her flight primaries. "I happen to have run away from an engagement."
"You're engaged? To who?"
"An earl, if you must know."
"What, were you holding out for a duke?"
"No, I just don't want to marry him."
"Is he unattractive?"
"Not particularly, at least by aristocratic standards. But it would never work. I'm a follower of Sappho."
Hyacinth was unfamiliar with Sappho, but she supposed it was another elder god. They were always popping up and creating new cults. "Following Sappho means you have to stay a virgin?" Some of the cults insisted on only feeding virgins to their god, even though elder gods didn't understand virginity as a concept.
"Well, no. Rather the opposite, really. But I want to marry a woman."
"Surely your parents could find someone suitable. There are many aristocratic ladies, and some of them will inherit land."
"I want to marry a woman who wants to marry me," Aludel said.
"Oh. That is trickier. Still, there must be other ladies who want to spend their lives with a lady; it sounds much more pleasant than always having a man underfoot."
"I know who my parents would choose, and I can't stand Duchess-apparent Veronica. She's just the worst. No, the only solution was to flee my engagement and get a traveling position, even if it was scandalous."
"What did the earl say when you broke your engagement?"
"Well, nothing. I haven't actually told him yet."
"Your parents are keeping it a secret?"
Aludel winced. "They don't actually know, either. And you can't tell anyone, especially Lady Galena. She says she knew my father in University."
"I promise. But how did they not know you ran away?"
"My parents were happy to hear I wanted to travel before the wedding. At least, my mother doesn't know; my father might suspect. He did find me a position on a submersible instead of a dirigible like he knew I wanted."
"What's wrong with a submersible? I find them the superior form of transit; much less likely to fall out of the sky for no reason."
"Only because they're never in the sky in the first place. I want to be up there flying with the birds, not stuck under water for weeks at a time." Her neck feathers fluffed up. "I've been watching from the observation deck, and I haven't seen a single bird. Fish, sharks, sea turtles, a beluga whale, but no birds."
"You saw a whale? Where?"
"As I said, from the observation deck. Except I never finished my tour, did I? If you're ready to stop sulking in your cabin and want to go sulk elsewhere, I'll show you where it is."
In fact, Hyacinth wasn't feeling sulky at all right then. It was cheering to know that Aludel was miserable as well. "Let's go. I'm sure Bom-bom will find us with my snacks."
~~~
Hyacinth soon learned that the observation "deck" was in fact a bulge atop the submarine made of transparent steel. There was just enough overhead clearance for Hyacinth to sit on a cushion; Bom-bom had to crawl when bringing refreshments or additional cushions. Hyacinth's only knowledge came from her uncle's seashell collection and her appreciation for seafood, but she passed many enjoyable hours watching various things swim by.
Perhaps this was her opportunity for glory. Discovering a strange creature was almost as good as building one. Over the following week, she reported all of her observations to Bom-bom.
"Look, it's a whale!" she said, pointing at a rock formation.
Her Abomination, too gracious to contradict his mistress, nodded.
Hyacinth pointed to some drifting seaweed. "It's a giant squid!"
"I'm sure that's a dolphin."
Spotting a piece of driftwood, she said, "A turtle! I didn't know there were any of those in the sea."
"Oh my, a one-man submarine. Right there!"
"A mermaid!" she said, pointing at nothing at all.
When she told Aludel about her discoveries, the lady said, "That's nice and all, but did you see any birds?"
"I've heard jellyfish have remarkable regenerative properties," Mortis said. "Can you imagine the homunculus I'd be able to make from one?"
Lady Galena just snorted at Hyacinth's report. "You might have seen a mermaid, but no one is going to believe you saw a turtle swimming in the Atlantic. Not unless you kill one and bring it back to England for study, that is."
Captain Chilton did not appreciate being bothered on the bridge. "I am not going to stop this submarine and send my sailors out the airlock to collect a sea turtle." Unlike the ladies, he had heard of the creature before and did not think it merited special treatment.
"I'm calling it a Hyacinth Water Turtle," Hyacinth said.
"I don't care what you call it. We aren't stopping the submarine."
Hyacinth took a deep breath, stomped her feet and screamed. Six hours later, Chilton was in his room treating his headache with copious amounts of bourbon and the Widowmaker was stopped at the bottom of the ocean.
Hyacinth had struggles of her own. The diving costume was horrible: there wasn't room inside for her hoops or her bustle. Worse, the only ones available were clearly designed for men: they had trouser bottoms. Hyacinth insisted she didn't need a diving costume at all and would simply wear a winter dress to protect against the crushing forces of the deep.
For the two hours Hyacinth was throwing a second fit, Bom-bom was busy with a needle and thread; in the end he was able to present a diving suit with an attached skirt (taken from Hyacinth's least favorite ballgown).
"They're still trousers underneath," Hyacinth objected.
"Come now," Aludel said. "They're really more like drawers. Completely hidden under the skirt."
"You think so?"
"I know so. Besides, look how beautifully your Abomination has decorated it: ribbons, ruffles and even a pleated trim. It really is the height of fashion for underwater exploring."
The ship had been sitting motionless on the ocean floor for three hours before Hyacinth pinned her hair up in a style that would fit inside the diving helmet, bolted everything in place and took her first steps out into the ocean. With only her trusty Bom-bom, chief minion, two lesser minions, and two sailors, she set off alone into the unknown.