When Eren woke up, he honestly didn't remember talking to Armin the night before, much less agreeing to anything.
"Eren you promised!" Armin pouted as he pulled on his sleeve in an attempt to pull Eren towards the medic office.
Eren sighed, "I already told you I really don't remember agreeing to anythin'."
"Seriously Eren, you looked walls awful last night, all you have to do is go get a quick check up."
"I get that you think I looked bad last night but look at me now," Eren responded as he gestured towards his face, "Does this look like someone who is sick?"
Armin frowned. "You can never know-and why are you being so stubborn about this! Just go get your temperature and if you're fine you'll be able to make it back in time for lineup."
"I'm being stubborn because there's no point in possibly missing part of morning lineup, making the commander mad, for absolutely no reason!"
"So you're admitting that you don't have a legitimate reason to not go?"
"Huh?" Eren responded, confused.
"The commander doesn't mind if you're late because of the medic, due to the plague scare a few months back." Armin smirked as he crossed his arms.
Shit, Eren had forgotten about that, despite it being the whole reason he was sure his plan to hide his wrist injury by pretending to be sick would work.
Around three months back, a couple of recruits had returned from visiting their families in the Calaneth district just a few days before an epidemic struck. Although they knew about the situation, because they hadn't been showing symptoms at the time, they weren't allowed to be exempt from training.
By the time the worst of the sickness was upon them they'd already infected half of the camp.
While it was much less intense in the camp, due to easier access to medical supplies, a number of cadets were rendered totally unable to train for weeks, even months afterwards.
(Some had also died, but Eren preferred not to think about that.)
Eren huffed, "It's a perfectly legitimate reason to not want to go! Plus what if he says something important during lineup?"
"Then I'll tell you later, but for walls sake just visit the medic!" Armin practically shouted, throwing his hands into the air. "You literally have no reason not to!"
Eren grimaced. He certainly had a couple of reasons he really didn't want to, but it wasn't like he could tell Armin.
"Look, I just don't want to, Ok?"
"Eren..."
He decided to look away, knowing exactly what was coming.
Armin looked up at him, lowering his eyebrows and starting to tear up for effect. "Y'know I'm just concerned for you right? Both me and Mikasa."
Fuck, this was part of what Eren was worried about. At some point Armin had realized that he could play both of his friends like a fiddle simply by playing up the whole 'I'm weak and need to be protected and only care about your wellbeing act' and despite the fact that Eren knew full well it was a trick, Sina was Armin good at it.
Eren turned away and crossed his arms.
"No, we've got lineup in twenty five minutes and there's no point."
"C'mon Eren it'll be quick, plus you don't want Mikasa to become involved and get worried do you?"
Oh so he was moving away from manipulation into direct threats now. Well two could play at that game.
"No, but if I go to the medic she'll find out either way, so the only way to avoid that is to not go." Eren retorted. Truthfully he hated lying to her about his well being, but she could definitely be overbearing sometimes.
Armin's beginnings of a smirk faltered as he realized that Eren was somewhat right. If he showed up late a second day in a row it would send the already worrying Mikasa into a frenzy.
"Look I'll make a deal with you that I don't really like." Armin conceded. "I'll get her off your back, and I'll ignore whatever weird thing you've been sneaking off to do-
"I have not been sneaking off to do weird things."
"-If, and only if you head to the medic right now."
Eren stopped for a second to consider his options. If Mrs. Servott got suspicious of anything that was happening, he was fucked. She'd have to report him to whatever military higher up she could, and who knows what would happen to him then.
However if Armin and Mikasa caught on..., well to be honest, he'd probably still be equally fucked, but in the long run he'd be spending much more time with the two, leaving them more time to figure out something was wrong and investigate themselves.
If he got Armin and Mikasa fully off his back now, he wouldn't have to worry about any of that, and to do it he'd only have to spend ten minutes at the medic tent, tops.
With a sigh Eren agreed, "Fine, I'll do it."
"Finally, I don't know why-
"But!" Eren interrupted, "But, you have to completely drop the subject. No more 'Eren, I don't believe you', 'Eren, I don't think that's the full story', and no more bugging me about it after I've already explained it to you."
Armin looked at him skeptically. It wasn't exactly normal for Eren to be so adamant about hiding things, but at the moment he was much more concerned for Eren's physical wellbeing than what was happening over the past few days.
"Fine, I'll do it." Said Armin raising his hand. "Shake on it?"
"Yeah." Responded Eren as he gripped his hand, giving it a good shake.
When Eren stepped back to finally get a look at Armin's face he noticed he looked frustrated, more upset than he was letting on about the results of the deal, and for a fleeting second Eren felt really bad about what he'd just done.
"Well you better get off to the medic then, you only have about twenty minutes now." Armin said, breaking the tension.
Eren rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. "Yeah, I guess... See you at lineup then?"
Armin gave a small smile as he responded, "Yeah, see you in a bit." And with that he headed off.
Eren watched his retreating back for a second before making a quick turn on his heel.
As much as he didn't want to head over, a deal was a deal, and Eren wasn't gonna be the one to break it.
-
Once he reached the medic tent and explained his situation, Mrs. Servott was surprisingly sympathetic.
"I knew somethin' was wrong when ya' walked in 'ere a couple days ago." She explained as she rooted through her supplies to grab a thermometer. "As much as ya claimed you were just tryna' skip a lil' bit, you didn't look right."
Eren huffed. Well yeah that was because his wrist still hurt like a bitch at that time! It had nothing to do with any sort of sickness, and he hadn't been sick in Walls knew how long.
Wait.
Eren stopped to think for a second. If he could heal from cuts and regenerate limbs did that mean he was immune to sickness? After all, sickness was just your body getting hurt while trying to fight off, uhhh, well he forgot the word for it-he'd have to ask Armin later-right? If his body didn't get hurt, or healed from that super fast, wouldn't it mean he wouldn't get sick at all?
He stared down at his hands for a second as he continued to contemplate. It was definitely possible. He hadn't tested any internal injuries or issues like poison or disease, Sina it hadn't even occurred to him!
If he could fight off those nasty infections, could that ability be transferred to someone else, could any of his abilities be transferred to someone else!? If so that would give humanity and even better fighting chance! He could become a powerful asset, both saving people and attacking, he could lower the death rates in the Survey Corps, he could-
"Ok hun, I'm gonna need ya to open your mouth real quick."
Eren was pulled out of his thoughts to see Mrs. Servott standing in front of him, a thermometer held out expectantly.
"Oh I, umm, ok."
He opened his mouth and allowed the thermometer to be placed in, angling it upwards so he could see the little markings on the front, a big black line placed at 100.4 degrees fahrenheit.
"Just make sure to keep that under ya tongue, ok?"
"Yes ma'am, I will."
She smiled up at him. "Good. Now that's gonna take a lil' while, so I'm gonna keep filing records in the front room while it warms up. Just call me if you need anythin'"
"I understand." Eren responded, as he attempted to watch the small red bar creep upwards.
As Eren continued to wait, she gripped a large mass of paperwork and made her way to the front, totally separating the two.
He simply continued to sit, as he watched the red bar rise, and rise, slowly inching its way up the glass tube. He didn't think much of it until it started getting close to that black line, then closer, and the past it all together.
Now, Eren had almost no clue what that line meant, but at worst it was probably normal temperature, so passing it was probably not a good thing.
Even after the line had been passed, the red continued to rise, creeping ever closer to the large glass bell at the end, finally stopping around the 110 degree mark.
Eren stared at it for a second. That was...not good? Fuck, he had no idea what the average human tempature was, but it was always better to be below than higher right?
He quickly ripped the thermometer out of his mouth, staring at the reading for a second as it began to fall.
"Has the red stopped movin' upwards yet?" Mrs. Servott hollered from the other room, accompanied by the sound of moving papers.
Eren opened his mouth to respond before suddenly realizing that if he did, it would have been very obvious the thermometer had not been in his mouth.
"Mhmm." He hummed, hoping that it sounded as convincing as possible.
Papers rustled again as she responded, "Ok then, just sit tight, I'll be there in a sec."
He glanced back down at the thermometer, noticing the red bar still much too far from the line for his liking and started to fidget. Walls, he hoped it dropped below before she got back, even if he did have a high temperature he couldn't afford to miss any more training.
He waved the thermometer through the air, attempting to get the temperature to lower as he heard footsteps start to move in his direction.
Just as they rounded the corner, he stuffed the thermometer back into his mouth, hoping it looked convincing enough.
Luckily for him, Mrs. Servott didn't even look up from her papers, just held out her hand with a, "Could ya hand that to me dear?"
He shakily placed the bulbous end of the thermometer into her hand, praying to whatever would listen that it was normal enough to pass. She looked up from her papers and hummed, eyes flitting over all the different readings.
"Well you're a lil' warm, but otherwise you're good to train."
Eren felt like he could collapse into a boneless heap. Thank fuck it was fine, but that still didn't solve the issue of him having no idea what constitutes a fever, or abnormal tempature.
"Um, ma'am, what would make me not able to train?"
She smiled back at him, amused. "Why? Are ya tryn' to skieve again?"
He flushed as he realized, that yeah, that was exactly what that question made him sound like he was gonna do. "No, no, no, I was just wondering because I didn't know and m' confused about what that little black line is there for."
"Ah, s' really nothin'. Just makes it easier to see and remember at what point a person is runnin' a fever."
Eren felt his blood run cold. That black line was supposed to be a high, and he hadn't just moved past it, Walls he'd blasted past it at the same speed Hannes had moved away from the titans, but how? What was the upper limit?
"Ah, that makes sense." Eren paused, wondering how to formulate his next question, before he had an idea, "Out of curiosity, ma'am, what is the highest fever you've ever seen?"
She exhaled sharply as the mood seemed to drop a bit. Nonetheless she still answered his question with, "In ere' the highest was a 105. Poor kid cut his arm on a tree and didn't tell anyone, cause' he was scared they'd be mad. It got infected and by the time he got to me there wasn't anythin' I could do."
Eren shifted awkwardly in his seat. "Ah, I see."
"It was much worse out there after Maria though y'know, with all the crowding and such."
His small half smile fell off of his face. Yeah he definitely knew.
"Lotsa kids gettin' sick, and no meds for em'. A real little one came ta me with a temp of 107 after bein' picked up off the street."
Eren looked down at the floor. Even though it'd been less than two years since he spent time in the Wall Maria refugee camps, it felt as if it'd been eons ago. The hazy days in which people ran around the area screaming, and you couldn't take a single step without seeing some kid or another collapsed and dying.
In some ways they'd gotten lucky. They'd still had Armin's grandfather up until the mass culling, and by the time that had happened, they'd escaped the worst of the disease and filth on the streets.
That didn't mean they didn't see any of it happen though.
"It was a real horrid thing y'know?" Mrs. Servott continued as she placed the thermometer back among the mass of bandages and gauze. "S' why I'm so glad some of you youngins' are here and fightin'. Shows me we haven't lost yet."
Eren looked back up at her and gave a soft smile. "Yeah, I'll do my best."
"Good to hear hun, but if ya really wanna prove that ya better get a move on. Mornin' lineups' in five minutes."
-
Despite having to sprint for a solid minute in order to make it, Eren was able to slide into his normal spot relatively smoothly, save for a few odd looks from those around him.
As the commander started his normal yelling drills, Eren allowed himself to zone out for a minute, figuring if anything was really that important he could get Armin to fill him in later.His mind wandered to the bits of information the medic had given him before launching him back into memory lane.
So his average temperature definitely wasn't normal then. He'd figured as much, considering he'd have to be at least somewhat warmer internally in order to produce steam from cuts (and considering the fact that those who've had contact with titans claim that they're extremely hot), but he'd never considered exactly how warm that would be.
Ten to eleven degrees above normal human temperature was far too much of a discrepancy for him to be comfortable with. He'd have to be much more careful when it came to contact and medical procedure than he'd initially planned.
He heard the commander's voice begin to get slightly quieter, signifying that lineup was almost over, and began to zone back in, his arms aching from holding a salute for so long.
As the group was dismissed to breakfast, Eren trotted over to both Armin and Mikasa, who were waiting for him expectantly.
"Eren why were you late again?" Mikasa asked him as soon as he stepped into hearing range.
He knew that it was meant to sound much more stern than it actually had, coming off as more worried than anything.
"Hey, I wasn't late today!" Eren retorted, "I've just been having a couple of issues with my straps lately. I think Jean or someone else has been shortening them while I sleep."
Mikasa stared at him passively, opening her mouth to respond until Armin snorted.
"Yeah, sure someone's been messing with them. That person is yourself who decided that properly hanging up your straps isn't necessary."
Eren flushed. While he was glad that Armin was holding up his end of the deal and defending him, did he have to bring that up? He'd just been too tired lately to do it properly.
She hummed thoughtfully and placed a hand on her chin. "That does sound like something you'd do."
Eren whipped around to face her and defended himself, claiming, "That was only one or two times! I swear someone is messing with me!"
"Actually-"
"Forget it!" Yelled Eren, throwing his hands into the air, "If ya'll wanna gossip and miss breakfast that's fine by me, but I'm gonna go eat."
Mikasa and Armin watched as he stomped off towards the dining hall, obviously attempting to seem angry, but coming off as simply flustered.
Mikasa was the first to break the silence as she asked, "Is there really an issue with his straps or is he lying again?"
He simply shrugged and put his hands behind his back to hide his fidgeting, a gesture not missed by Mikasa. "He really has been forgetting to put his straps up properly and fighting with them for the past few days."
"Hmm."
"I think he's just been really tired, but I don't know from what. Maybe one of those seasonal colds?"
The two stood in silence for a minute as neither knew how to respond. Armin knew she didn't believe a word of what he'd said, but he'd already made a deal with Eren, one he couldn't afford to break now.
But Sina, he'd been so sure that it was some kind of sickness causing Eren's odd behaviour for the past couple days. That was the only reason he'd made the bet in the first place, and now that Eren had been cleared by the medic, he was back to square one.
"Y'know you guys can tell me about whatever's going on right?" Asked Mikasa, pulling her scarf up closer to her face and beginning to fidget with it, "If something's happening m' more than willing to help out."
Armin gave a small smile before responding, with a "Yeah." As much as he wished he could fill her in one what Eren had been doing, to be honest at this point he had no clue.
-
Oblivious to Armin and Mikasa's torment, Eren continued on with his testing as if nothing had ever happened, and it had always been a normal part of his life.
Now that they were both off of his back, and Armin was defending him, he had much more time to himself, meaning much more time to test whatever he pleased.
While Eren knew that the amount of time he'd spent in the woods over the past two weeks was a little ridiculous-Jean had even made a comment about Eren suddenly needing much more private alone time, but a swift left hook had shut him up-he'd found out much more than he would have ever been able to before.
At first he'd simply judged how long it took for injuries to close based on sight, but after stealing both a pocket watch and a journal his records had become much more accurate.
For starters he found that a shallow gash on his forearm that would normally take a week or so to heal completely sealed shut in about a minute, leaving not even a scar behind. A larger gash would take quite a bit longer, often healing around the four to five minute mark, depending on where the cut was placed. The further from his heart, the longer it took to heal.
He'd even asked Armin as much as he dared about the topic-Walls, that'd been an awkward conversation-and he'd claimed that stuff closer to your heart got better blood flow, so maybe that was it.
Speaking of blood flow, over the past week Eren had found what was probably his least favorite part of his newfound abilities, the residue it left behind.
While smaller injuries clotted and stopped bleeding within seconds, larger ones did not, giving ample time for blood to drip all over the forest floor, as well as his clothes.
He'd been forced to abandon his original clearing in favor of one that was much more hidden, as he didn't need anyone finding a giant puddle of blood on the ground and assuming the worst. Originally he'd thought that his blood would probably evaporate after being outside of his body for too long, just like a titans', but of course the universe couldn't make it that fucking easy could it?
He'd already had to scrap one pair of pants due to the massive stains that he had no wait of explaining, and thank Walls Armin had always been so insistent on him having an extra pair.
Other than that though, his testing had been relatively mundane. He'd eaten the stem and flowers of a plant with numerous white, bell shaped flowers, that Sasha had pointed out was poisonous long ago, but had really felt nothing other than a stomach ache. Whether that was simply the plant's effect, or if his powers truly did help, he wasn't entirely sure.
He'd also tested with small scrapes and bruises, smacking his hands into trees and timing how long they took to heal. Most of the time he could barely get the pocket watch out to check them time before all injuries were gone though.
Oddly enough, after ten or so failed tests, his hands felt heavier, like they were being weighed down at the knuckle. He'd asked Armin what that could mean, and while Armin had given him a weird look, he'd responded with, "It's micro fractures."
"Huh?" Eren had asked, "Micro whats?"
"Micro fractures. A fracture is when you break your bone or chip off a piece."
"So my hands feel heavier because I'm...breaking them?" Eren continued with an odd look, finally getting Armin to look up from his book.
"Well, yes, but not exactly." he grabbed Eren's hand as he guided it to an exposed beam. "When you hit stuff like this, your knuckles kinda um, break a bit?"
Eren looked down at where his knuckles were touching the wood and asked, "Wouldn't that hurt?"
"It's small enough and not deep enough that it doesn't really hurt, and when it heals it comes back stronger I think. I'm not really sure how it works to be honest."
"So it like, builds up more bone? Because I'm breaking bone?"
"Basically." Responded Armin as he looked back at Eren's knuckles. "Normally people don't really notice though, because it heals slow enough that you get used to it by the time it's done."
Eren's eyes flit up to a spot above Armin as he nervously responded, "Ok, wow that's really cool y'know, s' cool that you know that."
Armin face scrunched up in confusion as he looked back at Eren.
"What are you planning to do?"
"Me, planning to do something? No, why would I be?"
"Eren, when are you not planning to do something?"
"Um, pretty much all the time? I don't really plan to do much except join the Survey Corps and kill all the titans."
Armin huffed as he turned back to his book, "Actually you may be right, I'm not sure you ever think, you just do."
-
Although his testing was outside of what a normal person would do to themselves, Eren had come to the conclusion that he was unfortunately not a normal person, and outside of the minor amputation he'd done earlier, he hadn't done anything too major.
Nothing like the injuries the survey corps faced daily.
Which brought him to his current predicament. He knew that he could regrow bone and limbs and such, but what good would that do him if he bled out before anything could regenerate? It's not really that helpful to be able to get his arms and legs back if he's dead.
Although it would make for a prettier looking corpse.
Either way, he couldn't exactly cut off his arm to check, as he probably didn't have the mental will power or the leverage, so there was really only one way.
He knew that there was a major artery in his neck, and he could feel his pulse through it due to the amount of blood moving. From what he knew so far, the more blood flow that an injury could get, the faster it could heal, so if he just put a small cut in there...
He'd been prepping for a whole week in order to make sure that this went off without a hitch, as even the slightest mistake could lead to some pretty intense blood loss, or even worse, him being discovered.
Although he'd long since abandoned the whole 'hiding a knife in his boot' in favor of simply burying one in his testing area, Eren had had to steal much much more for his plan.
Towels, to clean up or apply pressure, an extra set of clothes, a blanket that he'd be using as a tarp, and possibly the hardest item to obtain, a small pocket mirror. With these he should be able to make the test go off without a hitch, right?
Which is why Eren Jaeger found himself frustrated and alone, standing without shoes or shirt, in between trees with a letter opener to his neck.
He'd gone over the scenario hundreds and hundreds of times. All he had to do was make a small cut in the artery right below his jaw, just enough to create tons of blood flow, then see how fast it heals. The pocket watch was set on a low hanging branch near him in order to provide a timeline of events, as well as warn him when he should start applying pressure if the wound hadn't healed yet.
He figured that if it was still bleeding after two minutes, he'd have to intervene.
Eren had thought of every way this could go wrong, and accounted for it five ways from Sunday so he just had to stop being such a fucking coward and do it.
Of course that was easier said than done, as Eren nervously watched his hand shake as the knife was placed against his skin. Not enough to cut, but just enough so that he could feel the bite of metal.
He could feel his heart rate increase as every instinct he had screamed 'What the fuck are you doing!', but he'd have to try this at some point, and Walls, he already had everything here. To attempt to move it for another time would honestly be more difficult than simply destroying some of it, as he planned to do.
Yet as he just kept staring down at the mirror, eyes catching the glint of metal oh so close to his neck.
He could do this. He could do this. He'd seen broken bones all but disappear, bruises that faded within seconds, and cuts sometimes close even faster, and what was this but a bit of a more dangerous cut?
Gulping nervously, careful not to have the letter opener cut anything before he was ready, Eren backed into a tree, bracing himself against it in order to gain better leverage, as he began to slice.
The flesh parted cleanly underneath the sharp blade, as the telltale burn of exposed meat and tissue began to take place, yet something was wrong.
Blood began to slowly trickle down his neck and over his hand, but it was slow, pooling into thick globs just above his collarbone as the wound began to hiss and knit itself back together.
Eren tilted his head back to get a view of as it continued to close. He could see the separation of skin and tissue, but that's really all it was. A superficial wound that bled slowly and closed easily; it's placement concerning for someone who would have to wait a week or so for it to heal, but ultimately inconsequential.
Fuck, he hadn't cut deep enough.
While he'd known this was possible, and was by far preferable to cutting too deep, it was still frustrating. In order to get the best results possible he'd have to wait around a minute to try again, as the blood continued to dry on his body, creating a very uncomfortable film.
And Sina, it would be awkward if someone found him with his chest covered in blood, no wounds in sight, and a letter opener in his hand.
He let out a small breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding as he lowered the mirror and blade for a minute.
He knew he could do it. That simple cut, right over the artery was already healing nicely, the edges becoming fresh pink skin. There was no way that something like a small nick would take that long to heal.
Plus even if it did take a little longer, it would just be a small cut. Enough to lose a fair amount of blood rapidly.
He lifted the mirror back up as he checked the wound once more, only to be greeted with fresh skin, rather than any type of laceration.
Good.
That was good.
It seemed he was at least somewhat right with his blood theory, as that had healed around a minute or so faster than normal, meaning that his arteries would probably heal really really fast as well.
Right?
Steeling himself one more, he carefully placed the blade over his previous cut, his fingers brushing the skin, only to find a strong pulse pumping right under his fingertips.
A pulse that was about to be brutally disrupted.
Once more he let the metal bite into his flesh, applying slightly more pressure than last time, keeping the blade steady.
He continued to drag it slowly through his flesh, watching as blood began to fall in rivulets, once more pooling around his collarbone as it fell faster and faster and-
A crunch of leaves from directly beside him alerted him to someone, or somethings' presence as his arm jerked, the careful precision of the blade lost as it carved sideways and down, down into his throat.
Eren's head felt fuzzy for a moment as he watched his neck spit blood down his chest and across his mirror, as if he'd just been an outsider looking in, as if he'd had nothing to do with the situation before what he'd done hit him.
The knife was quickly ripped out, a stream of blood following it, smacking the tarp with a wet sound, and holy shit what had he done what had he done!?
He looked down to see a puddle of blood falling beneath him, growing bigger and bigger by the second as more continued to join it, and that was wayyyy more of his blood than Eren was comfortable with seeing outside of his body.
He staggered back a few steps, the thick stream following him, forming new puddles in his wake as he struggled to lift the mirror back up.
It definitely hadn't been two minutes, but this was far too much blood. Even though he was certain the healing process should have started by now, he needed to see how far along it was, as if it wasn't close to closing yet he'd have to start applying pressure.
Through blurring vision he angled the mirror to his neck and saw-
Nothing.
Nothing but blood, blood, and more blood, now gushing freely from the large gouge in his neck. No steam.
Without even the slightest attempt to heal itself Eren's body simply kept pushing out more and more of his remaining lifesource as he began to panic.
He took a deep break in an attempt to get some fresh air, only to choke on fluid and fall to his knees, adding more blood and phlegm to the pool.
Fuck he needed the towels.
He needed to apply pressure, as it was his only hope if he wanted to staunch the bleeding and give himself a chance, but they were so far away and his vision just kept blurring.
His arms shot out in front of him, as he attempted to balance under whatever force was pushing on him, shoving him to the ground as his arms and legs gave out, forcing him to fall in the ever increasing pool of blood, which now stained his face and hair a bright red.
Fuck he was going to die here wasn't he? Not by titan jaws, not by heroically sacrificing himself to save someone else, but by his own hands, in a stupid attempt to test his weird regeneration or whatever it was.
It seemed like Jean's nickname suicidal bastard had been spot on.
Eren attempted to give a weak laugh, but it only came out as a soft gurgle as more fluid made its way into his lungs.
Walls, he didn't want to die here, not like this. Not when he hasn't done anything with his life, not when he hasn't gotten his revenge.
He'd never get to see Mikasa or Armin again, and they'd be crushed, crushed trying to figure out what happened, probably blaming themselves for not seeing the signs.
He'd never get to train with Annie again, or share stories of his hometown with Reiner or Bertholdt, or watch Sasha go batshit for breadcrumbs, or be a part of Connie's numerous schemes, or argue with Jean, or do anything he wanted to do.
He'd die alone, in these stupid fucking woods, with nothing but trees and the wind to keep him company.
Walls, he didn't want to die. He didn't want to die, Eren thought as tears pooled in his eyes and flowed down his cheeks.
His vision was beginning to fade as sleep pulled at his eyes, inviting him to a cold embrace as his body began to grow numb.
Not like this.
He didn't want it to end like this.
It couldn't end like this.
He wanted to see the outside world, what's beyond these walls, the Ocean.
He wanted to see Shiganshina again.
He wanted to say goodbye.
He wanted to live.
He wanted to LIVE!