"You feel the same? You feel the fucking same Rachel? Or are you just doing all this because you need a hookup and Kristie isn't around? Is that what I am to you? A fucking plaything?" Natalia was fuming. She shoved Rachel away from her and stormed to the door. She half expected Rachel to stop her, to try and change her mind, but she didnt.
"I fucked up. I know I did. And there's nothing I can do to change that. But I promise you, there's a feeling there. And I promise you that these feelings are real."
Natalia's mind froze. This was not how she expected the conversation to go. She expected yelling and screaming and shoving but the Dash player was calm.
"When you've processed what I said and are ready to talk, I'll be around. I won't bother you, when you're ready come and find me." And with that she was gone, leaving Natalia stuck with her feelings. Her head felt fuzzy and her heart was beating fast. Was it real this time? Of course not. It never could be. Could it? She knew she'd have to talk with Rachel sometime, but maybe it could wait a few days, till the end of camp at least.
--
Camp came and went with no real shocks. They had beaten Jamaica in a friendly and had been beaten by Germany. The only shock for Natalia was Rachel keeping her distance. She kept true to her word. Nat still wasn't ready to talk but she knew she would have to eventually. She at least expected to not she her till the next camp.
"What do you mean she's staying with you?! Why isn't she back in Houston?"
"It's the off season over there and she wanted to stay here for a bit, she's only at ours to the end of the week and then she's going up to Leeds to see her family. Why are you so upset about this? I thought you guys were close" Jordan replied. They had just finished a weights session and were the only two people left.
"I just.. things are complicated right now Jordan. I need to fully focus on myself, I'm so close to being match ready, I can't have her distracting me."
"She wont be! She wont even be around! The only time you'll see her is when we have you and Beth round for food. Besides why would seeing her be a distraction?"
"Because her and I need to talk. And I know what I want to say. And I know how she'll react. And I'm just not ready."